I'm such a horrible mom.

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Third Trimester' started by Kristin52, Nov 20, 2011.

  1. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    And he's not even here yet.
    Me and OH got into it, and lately I've just been so depressed and stressed out.
    and I said:

    I wish I never got pregnant, I'll give him to you, I don't want him

    I'm sitting here crying, and just cannot believe those words came out of my mouth, I waited so long for him, and this miracle, and I said that. :cry:

    What kind of soon to be mother says that? :cry:

    I'm such a horrible person.
     
  2. Luluchaos

    Luluchaos Well-Known Member

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    Bless you! Everyone's capable of saying things they don't mean! Especially when you're pregnant! I have a bit of a problem bonding with bump because he's just an imaginary friend at the minute... But when he's here i'll love him more than anything. Actions speak louder than words Hun. Don't beat yourself up about it :( xxxx
     
  3. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    I'm so in love with him. I couldn't wait for him to get here.
    I just can't believe I said that. :cry:
    I'm trying so hard to not hyperventilate, before I go completely nuts and end up going to the hospital or something.
     
  4. Luluchaos

    Luluchaos Well-Known Member

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    Well if you know how much you love him then just try to relax :) you don't need to prove anything, to anyone, especially yourself...

    Just forgive yourself a moments emotionality and move on, secure in the knowledge that you love him even more :p stupid words mean absolutely nothing :) you know how you feel, and he doesn't understand. I promise he still loves you exactly the same amount and won't hold it against you :p
     
  5. Abigator0806

    Abigator0806 Well-Known Member

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    Don't be so hard on youself! Everyone has said things while they were upset/angry that they didn't mean. You love your little guys and he'll know that. Just forgive yourself, you're not a horrible mother.
     
  6. ashley_gee89

    ashley_gee89 Mummy of 3.

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    Hunni try not to beat yourself up over this. I said something along the same lines wen i was pregnant with my son, its just hormones, our temper goes faster than normal and we blurt things we dont mean.. Chin up hunni, your not a terrible mom, you will be fantastic!
     
  7. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    I just can't believe it. :cry:
     
  8. FirstLadyM

    FirstLadyM Well-Known Member

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    I've said some pretty crazy things when I'm mad. I will sometimes say whatever will hurt the other person if my feelings were hurt. :blush:

    And surely you understand that being pregnant and hormonal might have had a little to do with it. As long as you know that you didn't really mean it and make sure you let OH know you didn't really mean it once you have cooled off.
     
  9. StranjeGirl

    StranjeGirl First time mommy!

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    You're being way to hard on yourself...words mean nothing. We all say things that we don't mean because we are angry, sad, tired, frustrated etc. Of course you love your baby, and your actions of taking care of yourself, following all these awful pregnancy rules, trying to do what is best for him, putting up with all the aches and pains etc are what matters, not some meaningless words you said when you were emotional. Give yourself a break and be proud for all you are doing! :)
     
  10. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    thanks girls.
    I'm just in shock.
     
  11. Aapoll

    Aapoll Well-Known Member

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    Being stressed and depressed ontop of being pregnant causes word vomit. Don't beat yourself up over it, I am sure your oh knows you didn't mean it and your baby won't hold it against you. You will be a great mom, the fact that it has upset you this much is proof of that. I said similar stuff when I was pregnant with ds1... In fact I was so miserable after he was born ( abusive relationship) that I said here take him I don't want him anymore he is half you! I just couldn't believe I even said it...I still have my son with me he is 6 now I have never been away from him, I couldn't love him anymore and I get a hug, kiss and I love you before bed every night. I am not a bad mom because I said something I didn't mean. In fact I get told almost daily by my husband that I am a wonderful mom and I am sure you will be the same.
     
  12. nikkinoo36

    nikkinoo36 Well-Known Member

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    big hugs... xxxx
     
  13. Johnnieswife

    Johnnieswife Well-Known Member

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    Someone told me once... ''If you worry about whether you're a good mother or not, then you already are''.

    Everyone has bad days and says things they don't mean, I have bitten the head off my daughter (11) a few times and have cried afterwards for hurting her feelings :(
     
  14. poppytal pope

    poppytal pope Well-Known Member

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    hormones hun its all hormones just try to relax a bit and take the pressure of x
     
  15. poppytal pope

    poppytal pope Well-Known Member

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    hi im all ways saying things i dont mean, dont beat yourself up your hormones and emotions are up the wall at the minute and will be for a while wich is why i think a little chat with midwife for some professional reassurance will help, he knows you didnt mean it, you never had a row and said horrid things? we all have especially when we are pregnant , and they come home saying how much they ache! so dont let it eat you up, but please mention it to mid wife they are there to help and support and you dont need to feeling this on you're own, and i dont think for one minute you are the first or last person to be having these feeling either.:thumbup:
     
  16. Elizax

    Elizax Well-Known Member

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    Aww bless :flow:
    Don't beat yourself up about it sweetheart, we all say things we don't mean when we're angry/stressed.

    As long as you know you didn't truly mean it that's all that matters :hugs:
     
  17. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    thanks ladies!.. after awhile, I just went to sleep, and now I just woke up.. OH is next to me, so I guess he realizes that I didn't mean it.
    I was in so much shock last night from even thinking those words I really felt like dying.
    I know people say things out of anger and stress PLUS the hormones, but I just couldn't believe I had said that. I mean, it's an innocent baby, how could you?

    But like you all said, people make mistakes and say things we don't mean. And now I feel alot better. All your kind words are appreciated!

    And Johnnieswife, that is a very good quote. Made me really smile!
     
  18. xxsteffyxx

    xxsteffyxx Single Momma

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    Hun I've said nasty things in the past, maybe once or twice the same as what you have said... please try not to beat yourself up about it. I'm sure your little bubs didn't hear or even understand you, so don't worry.

    You'll be a great mum!
     
  19. BeachComber

    BeachComber Well-Known Member

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    I have also said some really horrible things when I have been upset, tired and stressed over things, especially lately. I have felt sooooooo horrible afterwards, so please give yourself a hug and try not to be too hard on yourself. :hugs::hugs:
     
  20. Kristin52

    Kristin52 Well-Known Member

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    thanks ladies :)
     

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