Interracial relationships

[Blah11]

I have been in an interracial relationship in the past and it caused no problems at all, but I grew up in a very multicultural area of London and perhaps that is why. But we were British - our culture was the same. It is so sad that it is something that even needs to be discussed in this day and age! I hate when people say that they aren't races they just 'aren't attracted to other races'. How can you know that you aren't attracted to every single person in an entire race? So weird.

personally i am basing that on looks alone. Obviously every race has certain physical feautures that are common and occur on pretty much everyone of that race. I've never seen a black guy or a chinese guy and thought they were really hot. i can appreciate theyre good looking but i dont want to make babies with them iykwim? i just see it as a personal preference the same as some women like tall guys and some women like men with dark eyes.

 

[Yammas]

Its also only from people personal experiences you'll never see every person in a race its not possible. I can say im not attracted to asians anlthough there peobably are some out there that i would be attracted to, from the one ive seen I just didnt like them that way if that makes sense...

 

[MrsHernandez]

My Husband is Mexican and i am Caucasian. I don't think that race impacts our relationship at all, if anything, i think its our differences that make us a stronger couple! But, i do think, that going into a marriage/relationship with someone who has a different culture/traditions than your own, you have to be open minded and accepting. Because if not, you're going to end up unhappy/confused at points.

 

[sophxx]

I completely agree with this they are both as bad as one another. I live nr Nic in one Of the other riots towns do racism is rife here if you walk down tge street with acasain man you get abuse from both. Sadly people are very racist and we gave a awful kit if bnp here. My oh has lots of White and Asian friends we was once out with his White friends when for sone reason conversation changed and they launched in to a racist rant about pakis while my oh was sat there people seem to forget that he's asain cos he's there friend. X

I have to say, from what Ive seen heard, my friend tells me. There isnt a more racist city in the UK other than Bradford. Its like casual and open racism is the norm.
Makes my head spin the stories she tell me.

Exactly like that. But both ways. Racisms against the Pakistani people and Racism toward white British is abundant in equal measure. Fort 3 years I worked in the city and Ive been called a White pig, White cow etc etc. ALways with the "white" bit thrown in.
Worst incident was when the English defence league came and the fighting between them and the Muslim defence league was awful!!
Its so sad because if you talk to old school Bradfordians, you only went shopping to Bradford in the "old days" if you had a Rolls Royce and fur coat!

Sorry for taking off topic a bit x

 

[sophxx]

I always think it's easy to date a guy from a different religion background it's once things start to get serious and you start meeting family's ect that you really see tge reaction from family's and find out that often here it's not as easy as just being in love sadly x

 

[Dragonfly]

My ex had to dump me when his parents found out my religion and I didnt even do religion then they just asked him out right and they banned me from their house to! said no catholics allowed and they where protestant. He eventually dumped me, said his granny wasnt to happy about him seeing me. I think I defo had a lucky escape with him. Wasnt nice being treated like crap when I was allowed in before the ban from his parents who where only suspicious at that stage. He isnt even on line after that and this was like 9 years ago? he just disappeared of the face of the earth.

 

[Andypanda6570]

I see nothing wrong with it, you can't help who you fall in love with. My first love ever was Albanian , his parents would never accept me, even if I converted to Muslim it didn't matter i had to be Albanian. He was engaged to be married all their marriages were arranged. He broke off that marriage for me and I stayed for awhile, but his father told me straight out if my son marries you he will be disowned and on his own, we will never accept you
So I left him cause I knew I would never be accepted . My father also had a problem, he is very Italian and wanted me to marry in my faith he didn't care he was Albanian just that he was muslim , I knew my dad would come around even if I married an Albanian . My dad would never disown me. I just thought about how he would loose his family and how if I had kids they would never know their grandparents, It was so complicated and I was so young. So I did what I thought was best and left him. I am now married 21 years to my love, but I often think of my other first love and I wonder if I did the right thing.

 

[Lightworker]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

 

[caz81]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

Im the opposite, Im white but im really not attracted to white men at all. I read a survey once (I think it was the daily fail so probably not much weight to it) that people are actually more subconsciously attracted to people of different races. I think a lot of the time interracial dating/marriage does not happen more due to cultural reasons and lack of acceptance of it more than anything else. I do find your theory an interesting one though and am interested in what others have to say about it.

 

[Nibblenic]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

Ive never only ever found black and Mediterranean men attractive. I am mainly drawn to very tall, well built (like rugby player build) with dark features and lots of brains.

In the main Asian men tend to be a little shorter and northern European men tend to be fairer obviously as a stereotype

Ive heard you are mean to be most attracted to someone who has close physical features to you but as close to opposite genetically however that works

 

[tina3747]

My ex had to dump me when his parents found out my religion and I didnt even do religion then they just asked him out right and they banned me from their house to! said no catholics allowed and they where protestant. He eventually dumped me, said his granny wasnt to happy about him seeing me. I think I defo had a lucky escape with him. Wasnt nice being treated like crap when I was allowed in before the ban from his parents who where only suspicious at that stage. He isnt even on line after that and this was like 9 years ago? he just disappeared of the face of the earth.

I never realised how bad sectarianism was till at a Celtic / rangers game!

 

[smelly07]

I am mostly attracted to blonde blue eyed white men (<<my husband) and obviously although im half white i have brown hair/eyes and olive skin so we are complete opposites in the way we look.

However i do find certain men of certain races attractive, again for me its more they religious aspect would put me off having a relationship with someone rather than the race.

 

[tina3747]

I don't think I'm attracted to a certain type... I like different things as well as looks
There's black guys I find attractive not all,also Asian but not all, dark haired guys mainly (hubby) ... So I suppose I'm attracted to an individual thing rather than a race ect.
I know a lady, her parents are devout Catholics from Yugoslavia . She loves black men, the darker the better.. Mostly Jamaican guys that speak patwa... She goes mad for them. She's never married, simply because her parents would disown her if they knew and she could never give up that kind of guy so she just flits from one to the next!
I could probably name someone from most races / cultures I find attractive like light worker!... I'm a sucker for a singing voice or accent!

 

[alaskagrown]

I've been in one mixed relationship. I'm white and he was Alaskan Native.

Mixed relationships are super common here. I live in a community where the population is roughly 40% Filipino, 45% Caucasian, 10% Hispanic, 2% Alaskan Native, and 2% Samoan/Pacific Islander.

I watched a show recently on why so many men are attracted to Asian women. The men perceived them as very stereotypical and submissive, and when the women heard that...boy, were they PISSED! Haha!

 

[Blah11]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

Ive never only ever found black and Mediterranean men attractive. I am mainly drawn to very tall, well built (like rugby player build) with dark features and lots of brains.

In the main Asian men tend to be a little shorter and northern European men tend to be fairer obviously as a stereotype

Ive heard you are mean to be most attracted to someone who has close physical features to you but as close to opposite genetically however that works

my oh and I both have bigger lips, big eyes, long eyelashes but i am fair skinned blonde with blue eyes and he is olive skinned black hair and dark brown eyes. both the kids have the same eyes/lashes/lips. roman is a little fairer than amelie but she has caramel coloured hair, blue eyes and her skin is nearer to his than mine

 

[TattiesMum]

I live in the outskirts of Bradford. Bradford is often described as the second most multicultural city after London. The center is of the city is predominately Asian and in those areas you tend to see very few white people. What tends to happen here is the suburbs, like where I live have very few residents who are not white and that's why the segregation and racism is still pretty dreadful around here. A mixed race relationship between a white person and an Asian person would be frowned upon sadly. Our village has been a BNP seat for quite a few years now so either that has an effect things x

That's really interesting ... I live in Luton which is also pretty multicultural (much like Leicester as well) and here things are a lot more mixed I think. There is one section of town just off the centre which is predominantly Asian, but certainly in the suburbs and other areas in the centre of town everyone just lives side by side.

There is very little racism in general, particularly with my generation and younger .... and mixed race relationships are two a penny - no-one turns a hair. The BNP are laughed out of town regularly here - they generally don't even bother to field candidates any more and even the EDL, although they claim to be Luton based, are mostly outsiders - they don't have any real support in the town.

 

[Yammas]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

I dont think the attraction is as pp have said they are attracted to other races, I think that the pressure from certain communities to have a partner of the same race is more to do with it as I've had 'whats wrong with black men?' and 'there are plenty of nice black guys out there?' among other comments from family members.

 

[Lina]

This is a good example of a thread that discusses a very sensitive subject, without offending anyone. Very commendable.

I wanted to ask..does anyone think that perhaps some some people are not attracted to "outside" races more as a natural instinct i.e. to preserve their race..sorry I know that sounds weird, but do you think that's possible?

No, I don't think that is weird in the slightest, very valid point and perhaps one we do subconsciously. I can see why a smaller ethnicity/culture would want to preserve itself. I am all for mixing people and have often joked that a forced assimilation of all the races will eliminate 'racism'. My sister has/is in a relationship with a mixed person and it has not gone down well. There exists a double standard as a previous poster has said between the sexes, I suspect this is so as children take the fathers name and women are generally viewed as a vessel who should further the enlargement of her particular ethnicity.

 

[tina3747]

I wonder how many people want to date or marry outside thier own race or religion but wouldn't for fear of family members? Will the rate of mixed race or religion marriages be higher within Britain in 10/20 years when this generation become more tolerant?!
How will we feel when it comes to our children dating ? Will you be wanting to 'preserve' your heritage or religion?
Personally I don't think I'd like him to marry into religion, we're not religious at all although I'd call myself agnostic rather than atheist...

 

[Dragonfly]

My ex had to dump me when his parents found out my religion and I didnt even do religion then they just asked him out right and they banned me from their house to! said no catholics allowed and they where protestant. He eventually dumped me, said his granny wasnt to happy about him seeing me. I think I defo had a lucky escape with him. Wasnt nice being treated like crap when I was allowed in before the ban from his parents who where only suspicious at that stage. He isnt even on line after that and this was like 9 years ago? he just disappeared of the face of the earth.

I never realised how bad sectarianism was till at a Celtic / rangers game!

That was the only people I ever met like that. And they didnt live in my area lived in a very sectarian town where I felt like I was going to be shot when I went in to the place was covered in flags. Not safe for me to be in. My name dosnt give me away. Names give you away here, Irish name in that area you would brick it. I have received a threat letter in an Irish pub as someone thought I was a protestant when they heard my name. I was with my ex and his dad who where patrons of the pub and was handled well. The note was wrote in Irish and all.