is it wrong? am i a bad mum?

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by feisty_filly, Dec 21, 2009.

  1. feisty_filly

    feisty_filly Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2009
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    0
    well heres what happend:

    we left LO with his uncle to go up and see our horses and i started chatting to another lady on our yard. we must have been there an hour at the most but when i got in the car i got shouted at by my hubbie telling me i had taken too long and he wanted to get back to LO. he said it was like i didnt want to spend time with LO and i didnt care about him. i was devistated and tryed to explaine that i know he wants to spend as much time with LO at the weekends as he works all week but i spend all day with the baby, i never see any one except LO or my hubbie, i just need to tallk to people, i need to get out sometimes!

    anyway hubbie then changed the subject and went along like nothing had happend.

    is it wrong that i dont mind leaving my LO with people i trust for a few hours?
    am i being selfish?

    i love my LO more than anything and would never let anything happen to him but now im stuck feeling like im not good enough.

    :cry:
     
  2. xxxjacxxx

    xxxjacxxx My Eggo is Preggo!

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2008
    Messages:
    13,719
    Likes Received:
    0
    No you are not!
    we all need a break for time to time. As long as LO is safe with the person you have left him/her with then I dont see a problem tbh. I can understand your husband though, as he doesnt see him much..maybe he was just pissed cos he was sat in the car all that time (or was he?)
    us mummies need grown ups time sometimes for us to stay sane!
     
  3. whiby

    whiby Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Sep 7, 2008
    Messages:
    1,202
    Likes Received:
    0
    I don't think there's anything wrong with it - like you said it was a couple of hours with someone you trust. It's important you have time with grown ups too!

    x
     
  4. Kitten

    Kitten Mummy to Theakston & Nyah

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2008
    Messages:
    6,300
    Likes Received:
    0
    Sounds like OH was just pissed at waiting for you so tried to make you feel bad.
     
  5. Blob

    Blob Sarah :)

    Joined:
    Mar 10, 2008
    Messages:
    13,945
    Likes Received:
    0
    Agreeing with Kitten :hugs:
    You need to get out else you'll go mad even if its only 10 mins.
     
  6. xkirstyx

    xkirstyx mummy to Jack and Emily

    Joined:
    Apr 24, 2009
    Messages:
    5,012
    Likes Received:
    0
    hunny theres nuffing wrong with wen jack was 4weeks me n OH left him at MIL so we could go see we wil rock you in edinburgh so if ut a bad mum i hate to think what i am! hehe dont worry you need ur own time every now and then xxxx
     
  7. feisty_filly

    feisty_filly Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 24, 2009
    Messages:
    932
    Likes Received:
    0
    thanks guys, im just feeling a bit trapped at the mo :)
     
  8. xxxjacxxx

    xxxjacxxx My Eggo is Preggo!

    Joined:
    Apr 8, 2008
    Messages:
    13,719
    Likes Received:
    0
    :hugs:
    have you tried explaining to OH how you feel? That you love your little boy dearly but you NEED some time away from her to gather up your senses again? I went through this with Ant but after I had a little rant and cry he got the message and started telling me to go to my friends/shopping etc and I liked that. Made me feel a little more human, not just a walking, talking milk machine :haha:
     
  9. v2007

    v2007 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 16, 2008
    Messages:
    28,554
    Likes Received:
    0
    We all need time out once in a while.

    Christ sometimes i cant take anymore Cebeebies and doing bottles and dirty nappies and i think we earn time out.

    Your a fantastic Mum.

    xxxx
     
  10. lillysmum

    lillysmum Mum of 2 cheeky monkeys

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2008
    Messages:
    3,808
    Likes Received:
    0
    thats not bad at all, you deserve a break now and again
     
  11. Twiglet

    Twiglet Mum to 2!

    Joined:
    Dec 10, 2008
    Messages:
    7,819
    Likes Received:
    0
    My mum has Caitlyn every saturday for her benefit and mine and Liam's so if your a bad mum what I am?! :blush:

    We all need time out.
     
  12. Abz1982

    Abz1982 Mum to 2 nutters!

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2008
    Messages:
    5,685
    Likes Received:
    0
    Nothing wrong in that at all!! My friend takes Emma about 3-5 hours a week so that I can have a break and not constantly be waiting for her to wake up etc.
     
  13. dizzyspells

    dizzyspells Mia & Finnlays Mummy.xxx

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2009
    Messages:
    7,424
    Likes Received:
    0
    Us Mummies all need a break and a good natter from time to time.I would just try and explain to him how you feel.xx
     
  14. Kiddo

    Kiddo Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2008
    Messages:
    3,519
    Likes Received:
    0
    God no! I leave Harvey with his daddy for 3 hours every week and sometimes we'll leave him with his grandparents to go see a film or something on a weekend. I'd go potty otherwise.
     
  15. sobersadie

    sobersadie 2 sons and a daughter :-)

    Joined:
    Feb 24, 2009
    Messages:
    898
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hubby sounds like he was acting like a brat! If it was him chatting to someone he prob wouldnt have bothered but was mad coz he was left sitting in the car (men!!). Can you not go see some friends yourself at the weekend and leave hubby at home with the baby if he wants to spend more time with your LO? Its good for u to get time to yourself away from the baby. As much as we all love our kids it gets quite draining caring for them all day every day without a break.
     
  16. jenny82

    jenny82 Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2009
    Messages:
    8,986
    Likes Received:
    0
    youre def not a bad mum!! I had a thread like this myself last week as I was feeling the same way! I love my LO but I also love a bit of time out too - I think it ultimately makes me a happier, better mummy :)

    I went into town on Saturday with my mum & sister whilst OH babysat. had an amazing day, lunch, cocktail, mulled wine & came home to my lovely family feeling like a million dollars! i def recommend it!
     
  17. summerarmahni

    summerarmahni summer and bailey

    Joined:
    Dec 2, 2009
    Messages:
    889
    Likes Received:
    0
    Can your hubby not look after lo while you go up to horses on ya own, then everyones a winner you get me time and hubby gets 1-2-1 time with lo :) xx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice