January Jellybeans 2013!...

[Soniamillie01]

Aruppe - I've been back for two days already. In the UK we can have up to a year off and can do ten keeping in touch days which is what I've done so far, two of them. It was actually really good and I really enjoyed it. Yes I missed Archie tremendously but it was nice to have some me time (which I chose to spend at work lol).

Could you delay going back at all?

 

[BlossomJ]

Sorry for not posting since Elsie arrived. It's been a tough 10 days! DH took a day and a half off then returned to work. We won't see him for another week yet. Boy am I finding it hard with two children by myself! My family had said they would take some time off & help out, but that didn't materialise, however they have been a great help in evenings so at least I can get DS to bed. He has not coped well with the new arrival & it's breaking my heart. He has gone from being a sensitive, gentle little guy who does what he's told, sleeps well, laughs & sings, to the very very definition of terrible twos. He screams, hits, kicks, throws things & won't stay in bed. He gets up after I put him to bed, in the night & early morning & cries. I'm not actually sure that he's even trying to get attention, it seems more like he is genuinely distraught. I'm finding it so upsetting..... and Elsie sleeps most of the day, so I am still trying to play with him a lot, but it doesn't seem to help. Not sure how long it will take for him to adjust, or if he will. Anyone have any ideas or tips to help?

I also got admitted to hospital this week & A&E (despite double checking) cocked up & gave me the wrong drug, which is not to be used by breastfeeding women, so Elsie has now received blood thinners through my milk, which were given to me at twice the standard dose. She seems ok & has had no bruising or bleeding, but who knows whether it's harmed her. I'm furious!

Such a stressful week. I don't know how I'd be coping if Elsie weren't so good! I've had 4.5-6 hours sleep most nights, which is heaven compaired with what DS was like!

Sorry to all those of you having a rough time. Brieri - I'm so sorry & am thinking of you & your family

Nell - Very very gorgeous little lady there! Definitely worth waiting for!

 

[ARuppe716]

Blossom- what a mixup... I would be livid! But glad your LO seems ok!

Sonia- I could extend a little but it would require finagling the system to get more disability benefits and I'm not 100% comfortable with that. I'm actually lucky as it is to live in one of only two states that provide partially paid leave and work for a company large enough to have good disability benefits. I really do love my job and if I left or went part time elsewhere in the company I would never be able to get my position back. Right now I'm planning on returning and seeing how it goes. If I really can't stand it then we will look at our options. I do think like you I will like having some me time and interacting with adults but just worried that ill miss out on so much. I guess only time will tell how it will all go. You UK ladies are very lucky to have that year!!

 

[Soniamillie01]

Blossom - sorry to hear that, I too wouldn't be pleased re the drugs!

Well I've just found out that work have sacked the guy they employed to cover me!

 

[BlossomJ]

Blossom - sorry to hear that, I too wouldn't be pleased re the drugs!

Well I've just found out that work have sacked the guy they employed to cover me!

Lol... Not that much of a surprise though?! They must appreciate you so much more after all that!

 

[Betheney]

Blossom - You toddler is not reacting negatively because they feel negative about the change they are reacting because there IS a change and that's just what happens. My friends toddler got a new little sister which he adored and loved and doted on but like your toddler he really regressed in alot of areas, after lots of conversations with professionals they explained that it's not good change or bad change that triggers these things it's just change. Because my friends toddler liked the change, he loved having a baby sister yet he went backwards in everything because our special little toddlers are just sensitive to change that's all. So don't think of him as distraught because i'm positive his brain isn't thinking "i hate this change and i want it to stop". His reactions are just a knee jerk reaction, it doesn't mean he's actually feeling upset, because my friends toddler certainly wasn't.

As for what to do i'm really not sure. Just be gentle and kind at all times as i'm sure you are. Eva has taken the adjustment well i'm not sure if it's just within her nature or if it's because of how we've dealt with it. Eva get's so many cuddles and love and attention throughout the day and nothing to do with Remi is off limits, i never use the words "you have to be quiet Remi is sleeping" i let her hold him, cuddle him, kiss him and if she doesn't want me to feed him then i try and calm the situation first before feeding him. When other people start giving Remi lots of attention to Remi particularly at daycare when all the toddlers flock to see him, i hand Remi to Eva (with my hands helping) and then i swear she thinks people are then doting over her, she get's this satisfied look on her face.

I think keeping his routine as normal as possible would help.

Maybe Remi hasn't disrupted her enough to affect her, he really does just sleep all day and my life with Eva hasn't really changed at all. Maybe it's because she visited him in hospital for 2 weeks so was able to adjust easier. Maybe it's because she has always done well with disrupted routines because i have forever been disrupting her routines, she's always had a routine but i'm constantly throwing them out with shopping, errands, jobs, uni, visitors. So maybe she's grown accustomed to being disrupted. Maybe it's because she's incredibly placid like her father

I also remember you talking about how difficult it was with lack of sleep with your son so i'm very happy to hear you have a good sleeper

 

[ARuppe716]

Sonia- was this the guy who pretty much didn't know how to turn on a computer or send an email attachment? I can't believe he lasted this long!!

 

[Nikkilewis14]

I have to tell you ladies.. i went back to work a week after ella was born. Yes, I only teach mon tue and wed nights and sat afternoons and im not away from her for more than 4 hours, but let me tell you, I enjoy that time to interact with adults and clear my mind of any frustrations i have towards ella. I love her to pieces, but being away lets me clear my head, and I always come back in a better mood and ready to take care of her ten fold. I actually race home just so I can see her and love up on her!!

 

[mellywelly]

Hi ladies I hope you all and your little ones are doing well.
I was wondering if anyone can help me. My little girl is almost 4 weeks old and just the last few days when she is feeding she gets Very frustrated and squirms and pulls at my nipple then cry and comes off. Sometimes I try to burp her and that works but most times it's usually right at the start of a feed. And then when I try to put her back on, my nipple is in her mouth but she won't attach and her head goes frantically from side to side trying to find it, then she kind of sucks but won't attach and she gets frustrated all over again. I swap sides and it still doesn't make a difference.

I get this too, he will even shake his head from side to side with my boob still inside! At first I thought it was my letdown which is quick, but he will cough/choke when that happens so I think it's trapped wind as usually a little while later he does a huge trump, and I mean huge! I've started using colief which seems to be helping.

 

[BlossomJ]

Betheney - thank you for sharing your friend's experience. I think he just doesn't know how to handle the change. He got out of bed & cried at the top of the stairs six times at bed time tonight and actually only settled when I took Elsie with me to put him back to bed. He definitely doesn't have any negative feelings towards her, which is good & talks about her & says goodnight & strokes her. I just wish I could make the transition easier for him.

We went to a local breastfeeding group today, then did the shopping & visited my MIL & I think getting out and about helped. I guess we just need to get back to doing more regular things again & as you say, doing as much of his old routine as possible will help - although we tended to be a bit like you & things changed depending in what was going on.

Your daughter sounds like a really sweet girl. Remi is lucky to have her! (and such a wonderful momma!).

Yes I am so thankful about the sleep! & glad I had my babies this way around. I couldn't have dealt with a bad sleeper and a two year old! How are you doing sleep wise this time compaired with DD?

 

[DittyByrd]

DH has a really nasty stomach bug with vomiting and diarrhea. I am so nervous that Violet will catch it. DH has been quarantined to the spare bedroom and I am allowing him to walk from bedroom to bathroom. No handling of the baby. I am cleaning everything.

We have a huge Norovirus outbreak in this area (the causative agent for "the stomach flu"). Please keep your fingers crossed for us.

 

[La Mere]

Hope you and Violet don't catch DH's bug, ditty! Will be thinking of you!

Its been a while since I posted here! we're all doing good, Sam has started to sleep better st night finally and I am starting to feel human again. Afraid Rayven may be coming down with something as she has got a bit of a cough that started yesterday. My little guy is now over a month old, where is the time going? And he is already fitting into his 3 months clothes! Hope all is going well for all you ladies! Blossom, hang in there hun.. I wish I had some advice, but hopefully getting back to a semi-normal routine with Ds will help.

Here is a pic of my two babies!

 

[BlossomJ]

Hope you all stay well Ditty!

La Mere - You have cute kids

 

[els1022]

I still have just over 2 months of maternity leave but I'm already feeling sad about going back. We could probably afford for me to stay home but it would be tight and we would eventually like to save up and move into a bigger house. I also love my job and co-workers but am already fighting with the thought of missing out on things with my LO. He changes so much daily! Anyone else going through this?

I feel the same. I go back to work on Tuesday, 3 12 hour shifts a week. It breaks my heart to think I'll be away from Katie for that long. She depends on me so much for nursing and comfort. DH is great with her and he'll be the one with her when I'm gone, but he doesn't have boobs lol. I have no choice but to go back, I used up all my paid leave while on bedrest and my short term disability income ended yesterday. I'm the primary breadwinner and our health insurance is through my employer and I can't go part-time and still receive benefits. I do love my job and I know that my co-workers will be supportive of me pumping, though. Also Katie is still up to nurse a few times a night and I don't do well on uninterrupted sleep.

 

[DittyByrd]

I still have just over 2 months of maternity leave but I'm already feeling sad about going back. We could probably afford for me to stay home but it would be tight and we would eventually like to save up and move into a bigger house. I also love my job and co-workers but am already fighting with the thought of missing out on things with my LO. He changes so much daily! Anyone else going through this?

I feel the same. I go back to work on Tuesday, 3 12 hour shifts a week. It breaks my heart to think I'll be away from Katie for that long. She depends on me so much for nursing and comfort. DH is great with her and he'll be the one with her when I'm gone, but he doesn't have boobs lol. I have no choice but to go back, I used up all my paid leave while on bedrest and my short term disability income ended yesterday. I'm the primary breadwinner and our health insurance is through my employer and I can't go part-time and still receive benefits. I do love my job and I know that my co-workers will be supportive of me pumping, though. Also Katie is still up to nurse a few times a night and I don't do well on uninterrupted sleep.

You will prevail! I promise! The idea of leaving my baby makes me sad but I know it will be necessary soon enough.

 

[ARuppe716]

Thank you ladies!! I had a nice heart to heart with my parents today and am feeling better. Glad to hear you have some great support els!

 

[Lillian33]

Stay healthy Ditty & baby Violet!

Blossom, so sorry your DS is having a tough time & that you are too at the moment, things will get better I'm sure sending hugs!

LaMere, Rayven & Sam look so cute!! Glad he's sleeping better now!

Aruppe, try to just focus on the time you have with him now, you will still experience so much amazing stuff! Glad you feel better after the chat with your parents!

Els your DH sounds great, mine gets a little funny when Harry cries so not sure he'd handle covering 3 12 hr shifts a week!!

Hope everyone else is well!
xxx

 

[mellywelly]

Hi ladies I hope you all and your little ones are doing well.
I was wondering if anyone can help me. My little girl is almost 4 weeks old and just the last few days when she is feeding she gets Very frustrated and squirms and pulls at my nipple then cry and comes off. Sometimes I try to burp her and that works but most times it's usually right at the start of a feed. And then when I try to put her back on, my nipple is in her mouth but she won't attach and her head goes frantically from side to side trying to find it, then she kind of sucks but won't attach and she gets frustrated all over again. I swap sides and it still doesn't make a difference.

I get this too, he will even shake his head from side to side with my boob still inside! At first I thought it was my letdown which is quick, but he will cough/choke when that happens so I think it's trapped wind as usually a little while later he does a huge trump, and I mean huge! I've started using colief which seems to be helping.

I'm back to thinking overactive letdown again. I'm going to try using the Australian hold and see if that improves the situation as jake is now screaming and thrashing at nearly every feed

 

[River12]

Nelly I think that's what my problem is too fast let down. It seems to generally only happen with the one side and it happens to e the side that my nipple is a little inverted.

 

[Lilahbear]

I have a forceful let down too. Eva pulls off and coughs and I catch catch the rest if it in a cloth before putting her back on. It was also suggested to me that I hand express a bit at the beginning to make things easier.

What is the australian hold Melly?