well i have had a very eventful few days, had nct classes 3 times with another saturday, midwife tuesday and found out my husband was having another virtual affair!
nct classes have been really good would recommend them to anyone, they are alot of money but i think it has been money well spent, it has made me so much more relaxed about the rest of my pregnancy and labour.
midwife has said baby is very stong and growing to plan, head down and ready to go, small plug loss over the past couple of days too so im hoping i am able to wait it out until at least new years. she has also said that, although i am very unlikely to get a waterbirth, it will all depend on the on duty midwives so time will tell.
so anyway, after suffering from pre-natel depression for the last 10-15 weeks due to trust issues with my husband from past mistermeners, i find out he has been meeting up with my 17 year old cousin in secret and messaging her, nothing has physically happened with her or any of the others as they have all been virtual affairs but the fact he could do this to me again and after getting me pregnant and knowing how i have been feeling, has really knocked me for 6, dont no what to say, think, feel anymore. the stress is making bh's unbareable and im desperate to sort out one way or the other if our marriage can be repaired this time, it has gone too far too many times.
god i am so full of exciting, positive news arent i! its my birthday tomorrow so i shall be a 35 week pregnant 28 year old, sober and depressed this year but i will have a lifetime of birthdays to enjoy with my baby