Just found out I'm pregnant at 14 and scared

[tag74]

you are super brave! I really applaud you. I have a daughter just a little bit older than you. I'm glad your parents are being a support to you!

From a mom of a 15 year old, please do me a favor. Block your boyfriend's mom from contacting you. It's completely inappropriate. If you must, reply back and cc your mom and dad and tell her from this point going forward you would like her to include your parents on any emails she sends you.

Second, please get on birth control going forward. I know it makes sense to all of us including you...but you deserve to have a future as much as your little baby. And by only having one...you can do it. I was 23 years old when I had my first and that was young (and I was married and then divorced) but I managed to put myself through college twice. You're going to have some times where you feel depressed or even left out...but it sounds like your family is amazing...lean on them and your friends and keep your head up.

You sound very mature for your age...stay well and at peace.

 

[Kuji]

Let me start off and say that I'm pretty proud of you! You were very brave and confronted your parents and boyfriend early on (kudos on that!) and didn't wait in fear. I'm really happy that your mother is being supportive in all this, we all need someone there for us, especially when it's a first pregnancy, no matter how old we are.

I can say that I am disappointed in his mother. I understand being upset but the way she talked to you was unacceptable. I wouldn't take what she said to heart though and ignore her. If you want to, block her as well, you don't need that negativity right now. If she still tries to communicate with you in any other form, make sure to always tell your parents.

And just so you know, having a child as a teen does not mean that you'll be forced to live on welfare or whatever else your boyfriend's mother said. My sister was pregnant at 17 years old and today she has a great job, is married, own a new car and they're looking into buying a house. And right now, she's only 23 years old! You can still do a lot, it'll just take a little extra work.
My one advice is to try your best to finish high school. The only bad thing that came from my sister's story is that she doesn't have her diploma (working on it now though) and because of that, she actually lost a really amazing job opportunity! So definitely do your best and stay in school as long as you can, preferably to the end. You can do this!

Good luck and keep us updated!

 

[candicelayla]

Hey guys. I havent posted in a couple of days but have lurked while eating some ginger and drinking ginger ale getting rid of this darned morning sickness. The good news is that my morning sickness is starting to subside. Now mostly dealing with sore boobies, bloat and hoping this morning sickness goes away .

I was out shopping with my mom at one of our stops and we ran into my boyfriends dad and sister. He apologized for his wife and son since they have been living together since their seperation and said he wishes the best for me since I'm carrying his grandchild and will help out however he can. His sister even hugged me which was a total surprise. I felt loved from his family for the first time.

His mom even sent an email apologizing to me for the way she acted and thinks its cool I'm carrying his child and he should be more responsible. All after I sent an email saying I'm keeping the baby.

But now im not dealing so much with morning sickness. Oh, its still there… just not as intense. But the soreness in my boobs and the frequent urination are becoming things now and im not sure how, to lessen it along with my tiredness. Any tips?

 

[Kuji]

Unfortunately there's not much that can be done. The first trimester is considered one of the hardest trimesters due to those symptoms.
I'm not sure if there are any tips for the sore breasts since I mostly just toughed it out. They hurt since the beginning and all the way until 12 weeks. But remember that every pregnancy is different so your symptoms could leave earlier.

The frequent urination will unfortunately only get worse so there's not much to do about that. And you can't just try to drink less since you actually need more water to stay as hydrated as possible. Baby is also going to need some of that water for it's amniotic sac

For the tiredness, again, not much can be done. It's best to not drink too much caffeine either. I think only a cup of coffee a day is what's best (assuming you drink coffee). What I would do is, when possible, I would nap once or twice during the day. It definitely helps to sleep as much as you can and when you can.

Hope it helps!

 

[skyesmom]

So happy to read your feedback Candice! what a great and lovely surprise from his family, both from his dad and sister, and even more so from his mom (although she should have thought better and kept her mouth shot in the first place!!).

i hope his mom really puts her nice words into practice and gets some reasoning into her son as well.

as pp said, frequent urination won't leave you until the baby is out, as for the rest, the general tiredness can lift off when placenta takes over around 12 weeks.. as for sore boobs, they were one of my first symptoms when i was pregnant; i don't know though how it is in your case, as you are only 14 and they probably didn't even develop fully so all this hormonal rush may add some extra strain on them!

do you still go to school despite feeling crappy?

 

[Powell130]

Everyone else has said what I would have but just wanted to let you know that I commend you for being so mature in such scary/exciting situation at your age! I think you are going to do just fine

 

[DaisyDreamer]

Just jumping in here... You are very strong for facing this! Having a baby means growing up but it also means becoming a very beautiful woman. Was so sorry to hear about all the drama between you and your boyfriend's family.
If it helps, I was (sort of still am in) the same boat.... My partner and I only knew each other/have lived together for a year by the time I fell pregnant and his parents were less than supportive. In fact they have just said plain nasty things about it behind my back. Well I am glad that his mother apologized and hopefully the father of baby will step up with more responsibility and maturity too.

Bravo on his dad too, showing you support and love for his grandbaby. A lot of people can act out in fear but glad that's all over now. This may not be good news but challenges of parenthood have just begun! There will be plenty of comments from your peers and strangers about your choices, etc but just remember to keep your head up high--THEY just don't understand the precious joy it is to bring a baby into the world. But maybe keep it at one baby until you are older.

As for the urination, that's just a part of the package. Frustrating, isn't it? For sore breasts I would use ice packs or massage. Wearing a nice supportive bra helps a bunch, if that's your style. Fatigue is also a part of the deal, but sitting around too much can make you feel more tired. Take a few 20 minute walks to get blood and oxygen flowing and use that time to think about your beautiful baby.


I will be checking in on this thread every now and again and see how your journey is coming along. Feel free to message me if you need any reassurance or questions. Best of luck to you!

 

[MyFavSurprise]

Hello, I wanted to say that I think you are being incredibly mature about your pregnancy and I think it's amazing that you are finding so much support! It will help so much to have his dad and sister supporting you as well.

I got pregnant with my first when I was 22.. I was living with a friend, smoking a pack or more of cigarettes a day, smoking marijuana all day every day, and I had just gotten out of an abusive relationship and was being somewhat promiscuous with a couple of my neighbors.. I was on birth control, but it failed and there I was. Anyway, the day I took the test my life changed. I quit everything and moved back in with my mother who was supportive, however my dad was terrible and had only supported me when he thought I was going to have an abortion..my baby was referred to as "the problem" throughout the pregnancy, and at my baby shower my dad got wasted and it was just a mess with him.

Anyway, my son is 4 now and he is the most amazing thing in my life, my father and I are close for the first time ever and he's proud of me, and I'm pregnant again, planned, and getting married to an amazing man who loves my son as his own. I just want you to know that even though you're young, your behavior says you are ready to take this on and your baby will be the most amazing gift ever, you won't believe it and having a baby young doesn't guarantee your life will go anywhere you don't want it to no matter what people say.. it's still up to you

 

[Amy92x]

Just read this thread - hope you and baby are doing OK!

You sound like a really strong girl I wish you all the best.

 

[DaisyDreamer]

Teen pregnancy can be a problem. There are health risks for the baby and children born to teenage mothers are more likely to suffer health, social, and emotional problems than children born to older mothers. Also, women who become pregnant during their teens are at increased risk for medical complications.

This article is more arbitrary than fact. Surely OP's OB will give her all the information she needs.

Need I remind that this is a support thread

 

[tinkerbelle93]

Teen pregnancy can be a problem. There are health risks for the baby and children born to teenage mothers are more likely to suffer health, social, and emotional problems than children born to older mothers. Also, women who become pregnant during their teens are at increased risk for medical complications.

This is a fairly old thread but I echo PP in saying this is supposed to be a support forum and I don't think the original poster needs a lecture on teen pregnancy being a problem. Also, pregnancies in women over 35 are deemed as more 'high risk' with increased likelihood for medical complications than teen pregnancies, so that point is invalid.

 

[BabyBlondex]

What a brave girl you are and I'm so glad how supportive your parents are, you will get there, it always gets easier in time. I'll be following this thread 😊💜

 

[Bumblebee2408]

Your story moved me.... you sound so responsible and grown up for your age and I think the way you've handled speaking to your parents as well as dealing with your boyfriend and his mum has been amazing. I'm so glad everyone seems to have come round now though and things sound like they're getting better.

I hope you come on to update. Please message if you need any advice or just someone friendly. You're going to be a great mummy.

Keep strong.

 

[Key]

You seem like a very responsible girl and very strong willed! I'm happy you have supportive parents. Your story touched me.

 

[Tryingagain3]

Is love to know how your getting on now. Hope your good x

 

[Key]

It's going to be tough but that's OK and normal. If you need any advice, feel free and PM me. I am a mom of two, a 10 year old, and expecting a little bundle of joy! I was scared when I was pregnant at 16 but I got through it because of family and friends support and a lot of help.