London TTC buddies chat thread

[mk8]

Hi girls

Hope you're all well. I'm exhausted, slept late and early start st work. Ugh. So cd27 for me, af due around tomorrow. For some reason I thought this was it but my breast pain (which was very painful yesterday) subsided this morning and I might have had very, very little spotting yesterday (teeny bright red specks), not to mention cramps. All in all, I feel disappointed. What makes it worse is that my friends have excluded me from a party shes throwing her little girl (includes more adults though) because I don't have a baby- kick in the teeth. "friends" are telling me that I should have a kid soon, helpful aren't they? My Pms Is so exaggerated on clomid (cycle 2 now) its unreal. Need to book a doc appt and will push for an hsg. Even if I have to pay for it! Leeze- how did you choose who to go to for it?

 

[Leeze]

Hi lovelies. Am doing this one-handed on my phone so sorry if a bit brief. Trying to get kia into bit of routine which is very time-consuming and exhausting. Basically she was staying up really late then sleeping all day. Last night it was a lot better and she slept for 7 hours through the night. I couldn't sleep though, I kept checking on her! Soph, really sorry to hear the cycle didn't work but great to know they've changed your meds and hopefully this will give you a much better chance the next cycle. You sound like you're being really brave so big hugs go out to you for that. MK8 sorry that it sounds like AF is on her way, really hoping it's implantation bleeding instead. I found the Doctor online that I went to, I'm sure I've got her details somewhere if you want me to give them to you. She has a clinic at The Portman Hospital. But I'd advise you check with your GP to make sure it doesn't impact on yourchances of getting free testing and treatment etc. When do you go back to your GP? Probably good to get the 100mg Clomid if you can. I know a couple of women on here who conceived with this. Clanger, I relate to the bit about not being sure I you're getting it right. In the early days if I got to the end of the day and had managed to feed Kia, myself and the cat the right number of times then I was pretty pleased with myself and didn't really manage much more than that on a lot of days! So, has he got a name yet and do we get to see a photo! Big hugs to you all xxx

 

[Leeze]

Sorry, Star - I just realised I didn't include you then. That's amazing it's only 3 months till the wedding, time is going so fast. You must be getting really excited now. Sorry to hear your cycles are none-existant. Clomid sounds like a good idea. Did you ever try the maca? Xx

 

[mk8]

Hi Leeze - so good to hear from you. Happy new year to you and your whole family!

I have an appointment with my GP on Thurs to discuss referrals. I want an HSG done so will ask if I can on the NHS, if not, then privately and if I do it privately, how it impacts my chances of fertility treatment on the NHS. I will also ask about clomid. I am going to take cycle 3 of clomid at 50 mg as day 2 will be Fri 13 (how ironic!) and my appointment is next Thurs. Here's hoping eh? Someone said maybe I have endo because I have brown spotting a day or two before AF. Hmmm!

 

[Clanger]

Hi again ladies,

Leeze 7 hours is amazing-what a brilliant little lady she is!How's it been the last few nights and what type of routine are you using-am very interested in how you find it all.Kia must have grown so much can't believe shes getting on for 3 months!How are you finding your days-are you doing any groups etc?

Mk8 so sorry about af.Everything crossed for clomid cycle no 3.Lots of luck with the gp too...it's so unfair that different pcts will fund different things.Really frustatibg.However-I really think if you get no further with your gp app why not try seeing another gp in the practice.It's such a shame that after being so brilliant and proactive you still feel in the dark about potential further testing and the next steps.Perhaps another gp would be clearer or push things forward for you.Though really hopeful you won't need it and will be bfp-ed up this cycle.Do you have any other fantastic hols planned this year?

Sophiebee-as in previous message thinking of you at the moment and hoping you are coping ok at such a challenging time.

Hey to Starrilicious too!

All ok here-still being an anxious Mamma which isn't helped by tiredness.The boy is a little beaut even if he does mainly eat-sleep-cry-poo

 

[mk8]

Hi clanger

So good to hear from you and to see how loved up you are with mummy hood!

I have considered changing docs but not on the same practice as my doc is the head of it- it's his practice. I dont see a point in changing in the same pct either as they seem super strict. I will ask about a private hsg tho.

 

[Leeze]

Clanger, i'm losely doing the baby whisperer EASY routine. Kia has slept 8 hours a night for the last 5 nights or so. Amazing. I think she was over-tired before and that's why is was difficult to settle her. I'd say it's been the last 2 weeks or so where she's become more alert and not just doing the whole feed, sleep, poo thing! MK8, hang in there honey, your time will come and it's great you're being so proactive. Soph, hope you're doing ok and not too stressed with all meds etc. Star, hope things good with you xxx

 

[Clanger]

Hey,

Mk8 that's a shame re the doc.Is your pct saying 100% no extra tests or ivf etc? So rubbish if they are.But from what Ive heard some pcts are very vague in their guidance and will still fund some tests and treatments but people don't always get their entitlement from gps.That's why I think it's so important to make sure your gp is clear in what's available for you if you need it.Sounds like you're being so proactive and pushing forward with everything.Am really hoping it happens for you this month lady.You've been through so much effort and worry on your ttc journey-I am cheering you on so loudly-can you hear me over there in London???

Leeze, you are actually my hero mumma inspiration!You have got the EASY routine going and your little munchkin is sleeping lots.I live the idea of the EASY routine put can't quite see how aI would put it into practice.....how do you get your little lady to go to sleep after activity time?I still need to resort to milk overload to get my babster to sleep.Anyway-you are supermum and I am in awe-what an achievement!

Love to Sophiebee and a shout out to Starrilicious too!

 

[SophieBee]

Hello all

Sorry I've been so quiet - there hasn't been much to update from me, but I've been really touched by your messages of support, so thank you all so much

This IVF malarkey is hard. My body feels wrecked by all these hormones that I've been constantly pumping in since early December. I keep trying to tell myself that it will be worth it, but it's really hard.

Sorry! Trying not to feel sorry for myself too much at the moment

Lovely to hear updates from the new mummies - so glad things are going well for you both.

Star - hope those wedding plans are coming along. Not long now!!

mk8 - it sounds like you're having a pretty rubbish time too. I hope you manage to find a way to get your tests. I think it is definitely worth getting the full guidance directly from the PCT so you can see for yourself what you're entitled to. There should be a Patient Advice & Liaison Service (PALS) for your PCT and they will be able to point you in the right direction. Your PCT can also help you move GP surgery if you need to, so definitely get talking to them.

I've been down-regging again for the last couple of weeks, but my scan today was "inconclusive" and it is probable that I've got another week of the buserelin before I can start the stimming injections (and hope against hope that I respond this time). I had a blood test today, so they'll give me a call tomorrow and let me know what the score is. Not holding my breath though.

Will let you know if anything changes xx

 

[mk8]

Hey gals, thanks So much for your support.

Sophie- keep us posted. Keeping fingers crossed for you.

Mamas- you're both doing a great job, when it's our turn, we will get tips from you!!

Star- hope you're doing ok.

As for me, saw my gp, was ready to demand a referral for an hsg and to ask how much it costs to go private. Surprisingly, before I said anything, the doc asked me how long it's been. I lied, bad I know but I felt I had to because of the pct im in. People seem to get an hsg after a yr and I have to wait two. Anyway, I said feb/mar will be two yrs but we had a 2 month break in between. He told me to try clomid for 1 more cycle after this one, so altogether 4 on clomid and if nothing, he will refer me for an hsg. He couldn't confirm waiting time though. I am pleased though. He said if they find some blockages, they will fix it, if not, then nothing more the Nhs can do if it's unexplained fertility! Here's hoping my bfp arrives soon.

 

[SophieBee]

Hi ladies

mk8 - that's some good news! A bit of movement at last, although it's difficult to know what to hope for - it would be horrible to discover you have blocked tubes and IVF is your only option, but equally difficult to be in that limbo of unexplained fertility. I guess I hope you get some answers at least - remember that we're all here for you

Most of all I'm hoping that clomid does the trick and you get your bfp before even having to think about having an hsg

A bit of good news from me - the clinic gave me the go ahead to start the stims again So I shall be double stabbing from Saturday, this time on the higher dosage. Send me all the you can ladies!

Will keep you posted - next scan at 9.30 on 30th January...!

 

[Leeze]

quick check-in from me - we went on the tube for first time today, scary but exciting too!! Kia slept the whole time

Soph, great news you got the go ahead for next steps, really hoping all goes smoothly and for a very successful cycle for you - must feel like you're permanently in the 2WW!! xx

MK8 - great news too that you're getting referred for HSG. Is your Clomid dose being increased for next month to 100mg or staying the same? Might be worth trying to get it increased if you can?

Clanger - I relied on feeding to sleep for first 6 weeks or so but once they get a bit more alert I found it didn't work so well. After many late nights of trying to settle Kia - sometimes 3am, 4am before she settled for night - I realised by following EASY and giving her regular naps that she settled at night too. You have to look out for "sleepy cues" like yawning, rubbing eyes etc that I realised Kia was naturally doing after about 75 mins of being awake - then put them down to settle while they're in a "sleepy phase" - I'd say it works about 80% of the time and the rest of the time I resort to feeding her to sleep. I'd recommend getting the baby whisperer books - I got them cheap off Amazon marketplace!! xx

 

[mk8]

Hey girls

Sophie- great news about the stunning . Hopefully a nice bfp arrives in time for your anniversary celebrations!

Hey Leeze and clanger!!!

I feel a bit crappy today. I was talking to dh about the hsg and how my doc thinks there's a low chance of blockage because I've never had an infection or surgery. But I can't help but wonder what the hell the prob is then. I went for an std check last yr just in case and got the all clear. But the doc at the gum clinic said it is possible to have an std and for it to clear up on its own. Dh and I have been together for 8 yrs. at the start I did an std check- all good. He didn't. So I wondered if I could have got something from dh years ago (he had unprotected sex with his ex) and then it went away but damaged my tubes. Anyway, I was saying this and I upset dh, he thinks I'm blaming him and he said he was stupid but he was annoyed I brought it up again. Understandable and I felt rotten about it. I dont want to turn this into a blame game, but this unexplained infertility malarkey is making me wonder all sorts.

 

[Leeze]

Aw, hon. It's natural to want to find answers and be wondering about all the things that might have an impact on fertility. I'm sure your DH understands that. With the HSG, even if you don't have blocked tubes it somehow improves your fertility for the next 3 months anyway so it's worth getting it just for that in my opinion. Also, i'd recommend using softcups and pre-seed too to see if these give a helping hand xx

 

[Clanger]

Hey,

Sophiebee-wooohooo I am so, so pleased to hear that.Brilliant news and so exciting-keep us posted on the process.It all sounds so draining with these mega highs and lows.Are you getting good support in rl from people close to you?

Mk8 sorry to hear the evil thought demons have been messing with your head.People can have blocked tubes for all sorts of reasons and in the very unlikely event yours are blocked you would never be able to work out how it happened-whether you did have an STD or other infection etc.Given this I wonder if you can just try to bat away these thought demons when they pop up, maybe tell yourself how ibhelpful they are and then go and do something distracting to banish them!It's totally understandable that you are searching for answers and I really really hope you get them in the form of a bfp.Are you getting support too?Can you talk to your Mum or lady pals about this?

Leeze thanks for the tips...I have those books they they are great-not too strict.Would love to have the time to rea them properly though!Hows your house coming along?Are you and KIA going to any groups?

 

[mk8]

hello ladies, how are you all? good weekend?

leeze/clanger - how are things with the little cherubs going? i saw my friends baby yest who is 9 weeks old- such a cutie but a massive handfull and the mama is super duper drained. hope you ladies are doing ok.

nothing new with me sadly. been fretting on and off this weekend. im going on holiday next month to the states (california) to take my mind off things. on the one hand, i think a break away will be good, on the other hand, i think it will just remind me that i am still not pregnant (i wouldnt be on holiday if i were). im petrified that i have blocked tubes, which would really upset me as ive never had surgery, my sexual history is not colourful at all and as far as im aware, i have never had an std. then i think the chance of blocked tubes is rare and i know people who have been trying for over a year and all their tests checked out fine. i wonder if i am a true "unexplained" case...in which case, what is the problem? what would i do next? i have heard that ivf may not work as well. also read that theres a theory that bodies can reject a fertilised egg. going a tiny bit nuts. all i want is to get pregnant. i know i will be a really good mother, i dont understand why i am not pregnant yet.

also doesnt help that a male friend of mine harped on about how having kids over 35 is REALLY dangerous and has a REALLY high downs possibility. i told him hes talking crap, whilst the chance is higher, plenty of women over 35 have healthy babies. i wanted to kill him!

 

[SophieBee]

Hi ladies

Sorry I've not been on for a while, hope everyone is well.

mk8, I hope everything is OK with you and that the evil thought demons have gone away. I don't think there is any one of us who hasn't been driven a bit mad by it all at some stage. I hope that you're doing OK now

Lovely to hear from Leeze and clanger on the mummy update - hope you and your little ones are well

Star, how are the wedding plans coming? Not long now

I've got a scan tomorrow and I'm sooooo nervous. However, I really think I'm feeling different to last time. I'm definitely bloated and crampy, which I wasn't last time - I'm actually pretty uncomfortable, so I really hope that this means something and I won't just see two measly little follicles tomorrow. Keep those fingers crossed for me!

In other news, I decided to put myself in the ballot for the Royal Parks Half Marathon - coincidentally, I'll find out tomorrow if I have a place on that. Obviously I'll give it up if we get lucky with the IVF treatment, but I felt that if it doesn't work then I'm going to need a focus to get me through some difficult months.

Anyway, hope everyone is well. Wish me luck for tomorrow

 

[SophieBee]

Hi all - sorry I missed your post last night mk8, I must have been writing mine when you posted it so we crossed. It sounds like you're really going through it at the moment

Just a quick update from me - it's slightly better news. Just back from my scan and I have 6 follicles

Obviously I'm still in the poor responder category, but there are definitely 6 and 5 of them are good sizes (one 16mm, two 14mm and two 12mm, with a straggler at 10mm). So I'm back in for a scan on Wednesday, with likely egg collection on Friday

I know I'm not looking at having lots of frosties for future babies or possibly even more than one embie to transfer with these numbers, but it is a much better chance than the last cycle, so I'm feeling a little bit more hopeful.

Send me lots of ladies - I've got an exciting week ahead...

 

[Leeze]

woo-hoo Soph, that's much better than last time. I don't really know much about it, but am definitely keeping everything crossed for you that you end up with more than one embie (very cute word, btw!). Good luck for Wednesday and hopefully Friday too. Great idea re signing up for the run, let's hope you're not in a fit state to run it (in terms of being in a lovely pregnant state!)

MK8 - lovely idea to go on hols to California. I know it's easy for me to say now that I've got a healthy LO - but I'd say try your best to not think worst case scenario. I know it's easy to let your mind wander, but try your best to take it one step at a time. You're doing everything you can to get things checked out and being really proactive. I know lots of older mums (most of my friends had their first babies over 35, in fact most of them 38 or 39 and I've got another friend who's just had her second baby aged 41). None have health problems and none had an increased risk of downs.

Clanger, hope you're managing to get some rest and still enjoying every minute of mummyhood madness!!! I definitely recommend the EASY routine, or at least trying some of the principles. Can't remember if I said before but the main things that made a difference for us were making sure Kia has regular naps, like 4-5 naps every day and not letting her stay awake for more than 2 hours at a time. Kia and I haven't been to any groups yet, I've decided I want to wait till she's a bit bigger - even maybe just 3 or 4 weeks - so she can enjoy it more. We're still waiting for planning permission re the house, hopefully we'll get that in the next couple of weeks then can start the building work.

Hi to Star too, hope all ok with you - been a bit quiet recently! Hope this means you're busy planning for the wedding!!!

Things are going pretty well for us, makes such a difference to get a good sleep most nights. I've even stopped getting up in the night for a pee the last couple of nights so I've actually slept all the way through the night myself for the first time in about 11 months!!!! Kia is becoming more alert and starting to get interested in things around her, which is very cute!!!

Hugs to all xx

 

[mk8]

Hi ladies

Sophie- great news again about your follies. Good luck for mon and keep us posted! What will happen exactly on mon?

Leeze, great to hear that youre getting decent sleep now. How is your little one doing?

You too clanger- how is your little guy?

Star- hope the wedding plans are going well.

As for me, day 25, 11dpo ish and bfn this morning. Boobs hurt and cramps so i am pretty sure af is flying in. I feel ok tho. Disappointed that clomid didnt do the trick but hey ho. Holiday this month and will be on cycle 4 of clomid, if nothing then, then its hsg time! Not sure how long my wait list for that is though. Nhs...grumble grumble