LTTTC #1 - Support Group *Please share your story

[Renaendel]

Wow, that was a great improvement in numbers just based on the time of day. I had no idea it could vary so much. Thank you for posting this. Good luck on the Gonal-F for just the perfect number of follicles.

 

[KatO79]

Thanks everyone!
The stars were aligned with us and the SA came back with over 26million mobile sperm. Which is significantly higher than the 1.9 and 1.8 we got for the last two IUI's. So it seems the issue is the time in which the specimen has to be produced. This is great because the office is willing to accommodate us with the later time. so hopefully if i can produce the perfect follicle and he can produce some active sperm this could be our luck #3!!
I just hope I dont over Stimulate. They have me on 150IU of gonal-f which to me sounds like a lot. but really what do i know?

Wow that sounds like a good number

Yes it sounds like a lot, especially compared to my 75 IU But I'm sure they know what they're doing. Hopefully you'll produce more than 1 follie, to up the chances I warn you though that if you're like me you might experience very occasional and slight twinges/pain in your ovaries from the Gonal-F (I did with the Puregon). For my 1st IUI, I had a lot of these twinges/pains but they have gradually decreased and last time I had it less. This time I barely have any but there's still a bit of time yet.

For OHSS, here's a list of symptoms to watch out for:

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases...on-syndrome-ohss/basics/symptoms/con-20033777

 

[EmmyReece]

that's a brilliant improvement Myshel

Everything crossed for you xx

 

[EmmyReece]

Well ladies I have the proof that I need that my "friend" doesn't give two hoots about me

Last night she tagged me in a status along with her daughters and another friend about her hoping to find out the gender at her scan today

I really think everything I told her last week went in one ear and out the other and just goes to show once and for all that I mean absolutely nothing to her.

Ah well, it will be her loss as we've actually got a house viewing this afternoon, far away from this grotty estate and quite close to my mum. It's my dream home

TTC wise, I'm thinking about maybe taking a break while I focus on the weight loss. I'm literally petrified of getting pregnant at this size and would never forgive myself if there were complications because of this

 

[KatO79]

Wow, yeah I'd cool off the friendship and tell her that you feel like she's constantly rubbing her pregnancy in your face even though she knows you're LTTTC and you told her how it makes you feel. Some people just have no sense of boundaries I would almost understand it if she was pregnant with her first and super excited but since it's her 11th, you'd think she'd be more relaxed about it and not constantly talking about it so much. She's probably so "drunk on power" that she doesn't care how she affects others, her pregnancy and needs must take center stage.

I don't think she'll ever be able to understand your struggle. Heck, I even have women who had a less amount of kids that don't really get it or even people with no kids (my childish friend), never mind someone with soon 11 children Maybe just avoid talking to her about it anymore and tell her it's ok to have a e.g. monthly update (or whatever you can handle) but you can't stand to have a total blow-by-blow of her entire pregnancy. On FB it's easy to avoid these updates as I believe you can choose to hide her updates so you aren't constantly confronted with it and can look at them when you feel up to it. But if she starts to personally talk to you over the phone or in person, tell her.

It's hard though, I have a childish friend (she's 32 but acts like she's 16-20, a bit selfish), no kids, and I found out recently she doesn't get it either She told me recently that maybe my infertility is like her trouble finding a nice guy and that I should think positive and believe it'll happen She also told me 1 year wasn't long enough, she's heard of people getting pregnant after 1½ years. When I tried to explain what infertility is and that there is some unknown biochemical reason that I'm having problems getting pregnant (since any physical ones haven't been found e.g. blocked tubes) she just scrunched her face up and looked totally confused. So I ended up SMSing her and telling her I don't want to talk about my infertility anymore since she doesn't understand. Her response: I misunderstood her (even though my DH heard her and understood her the exact same way I did) and she's the one who's hurt even though I told her in a very polite and nice manner So she made it about her I'm so over it, not going to respond and going to drastically cut down on how much I see her as I obviously can't set a boundary without offending her

Sorry for the rant

I hope you get the house

If you feel a break would be good then by all means try it. I can understand your concerns with the weight maybe creating complications in a pregnancy. Maybe losing the weight will also help even out your cycles and get them down to a more normal length which will help improve your fertility. I hope you soon lose the weight you need and will still drop by and keep us updated

 

[EmmyReece]

no don't be sorry at all. It's hard enough having to deal with infertility without having to deal with (sometimes) moronic people on top of that too

I think if we do get the house I'll be hiding her updates and really limiting my contact with her as it's just too much at the moment, and for her to tag me in her status really hurt

I'll probably still post as I want to keep up to date with how everyone is doing and I can update then how things are improving as the weight comes off. I actually lost 5lb this week, which I was so shocked about. As long it carries on coming down I'll be happy

 

[KatO79]

no don't be sorry at all. It's hard enough having to deal with infertility without having to deal with (sometimes) moronic people on top of that too

I think if we do get the house I'll be hiding her updates and really limiting my contact with her as it's just too much at the moment, and for her to tag me in her status really hurt

I'll probably still post as I want to keep up to date with how everyone is doing and I can update then how things are improving as the weight comes off. I actually lost 5lb this week, which I was so shocked about. As long it carries on coming down I'll be happy

Yes it truely is I just think my friend's selfishness and her constantly taking offense and getting upset when I tell her she's being too much or upsetting is really getting to me, especially when I'm going through something so difficult as infertility. I'm actually surprised she hasn't tried to involve DH in this since that's her regular MO It's just insane for her to tell me that now she's upset because I told her that she upset me with her comments I can already see this friendship will fade out when I do have a baby because she requires too much attention and that we treat her like glass because of her past (abusive boyfriends, she's adopted, her biological parents leaving her by the side of a road at age 3, her problems finding a decent guy when she goes almost 100% by looks and won't listen to reason ect.). Hopefully I'll have made friends with other mothers or other childless women that better understand how a friendship works by that time because unfortunately, she's the only friend I have (since most women my age have children and don't make new friends, especially if you're childless they won't befriend you).

I really think that'd be a good idea to limit your friend as well. Especially if she keeps refusing to understand how her behaviour effects you and respect your wishes. Maybe also try telling her you understand she's excited about this pregnancy but you're having issues conceiving and while she may not understand why, if she could please limit her updates and how much she talks about it because it's painful for you to hear about it constantly and maybe she could lean more on friends that already have children at this time.

Wow 5lbs in 1 week, congrats You must be doing something right It'll be exciting to see how this weight loss helps and creates any positive changes in your cycles.

 

[Stine]

Myshel- OMG that amazing news about the SA. #3 sounds like it might indeed be your lucky number

Emmy- I have taken many breaks and come back over the past 10 yrs TTC and it is always nice to break. You always know when you need one cause you will say just that "I think I need a break". Regroup, take some you time and when you are ready we will be here

So, I started the Femara yesterday. I am doing CD3-7 and I have my U/S on CD12 which will be the day after St Patricks day. Hopefully the luck of the Irish will be with me and I will get the green like to trigger and have my IUI that Friday. I normally O CD15 to CD19 so I am not sure how the Femara will effect that. Do you normally O sooner, if you do O on it, or is it the same?

 

[Renaendel]

stine, the Femara made me ovulate a few days earlier. My normal LH surge date was the 15-16 and for me it bumped it up to the 13-14th. I did six months if it.

 

[Myshelsong]

Stine ... Yay for fermara. For me on 5mg it didn't really change my ovulation date, however on 7.5mg it went from day 17 to day 11 or 12. You may want to see of you can get in a few days since just to see how you react.

Having my day 9 scan tomorrow. Will be interested in seeing the progress with gonal, will be interesting as the last two times just on femara I was at 20 and 22 ...

Emma Good luck with the weight loss, it is hard to get it off I understand. Congrats on five so far, keep up the good work.

Kat I believe it is time to say goodbye to your selfish friend. Sorry hun

 

[KatO79]

Stine ... Yay for fermara. For me on 5mg it didn't really change my ovulation date, however on 7.5mg it went from day 17 to day 11 or 12. You may want to see of you can get in a few days since just to see how you react.

Having my day 9 scan tomorrow. Will be interested in seeing the progress with gonal, will be interesting as the last two times just on femara I was at 20 and 22 ...

Emma Good luck with the weight loss, it is hard to get it off I understand. Congrats on five so far, keep up the good work.

Kat I believe it is time to say goodbye to your selfish friend. Sorry hun

You're of course right Myshel and I've been trying to get DH to agree with me but I think he's caught in feeling sorry for her because she's so helpless and childlike and has had a sad past I feel for her as well (I'm not heartless and think it's sad she's been through all that) but she's just too much. I mean this woman constantly wants to go on vacation with us and is talking about going somewhere this year Plus she has other friends so it's not like she'd be completely friendless afterwards (until they tire of her as well when they have husbands and children and she tries to fill up too much in their lives). I'm now just trying to get him to agree we should see much less of her but he's a softie and she knows now to call him when she wants to see us because he gives in easier to her whims

I can't decide though if I should respond to that SMS she sent me anyway and let her know that her hurt feelings are ones she's creating and I can't do anything about how she chooses to feel plus I'm the injured party, not her

That's another thing, she likes to one-up me. I remember New Years 2013/2014 that she came by to get ready with me (she was thankfully going to another party than us). It was actually going well and was kinda fun until I mentioned I was a bit down that I wasn't pregnant yet. She then started in a pathetic voice that "At least you have a husband and will have children, I'll never have a husband or children"

 

[Myshelsong]

Don't reply. People like that have nothing to feed off of if there is nothing there. Honestly just stop communication all together. If your hubby wants to talk with her let him make that choice, but as far as you are concerned you are on a break.
Good luck!
Off to the clinic

 

[KatO79]

Don't reply. People like that have nothing to feed off of if there is nothing there. Honestly just stop communication all together. If your hubby wants to talk with her let him make that choice, but as far as you are concerned you are on a break.
Good luck!
Off to the clinic

You're right, I was just tempted to tell her that I find it disgusting that she's making it about her and discussing her hurt feelings when we were talking about how hurtful I found her behaviour. To make it worse, she even told me that I misunderstood the depth of her advice I'm just afraid that she'll want to discuss it with me next time I see her, she always does.

Definitely need to get DH on board with this but it's difficult. He already has a selfish friend (luckily he's DH's problem since I see him maybe every 3-4 months), I just don't see why he wants another one I'll try again and see if I can get him to agree to having a break from her.

BTW I'm going in for a scan tomorrow

Good luck Myshel

 

[DBZ34]

Wow, Kat. Your friend does sound super selfish and like she wants all the attention she can get. I don't blame you for wanting a break from her. And the fact she's playing your DH like that...I'd keep a careful eye on her.



Good luck Myshel! I hope you have some great follies!!



AFM- Femara starts today! I'm super excited. My scan is next Wednesday and then I guess we'll see when the IUI gets scheduled for. I'm hoping I won't ov early on Femara...but it's a waiting game. I kind of wish we got as many scans as I did in the UK here in the US so I'd know what was going on in there....

 

[Stine]

AFM- Femara starts today! I'm super excited. My scan is next Wednesday and then I guess we'll see when the IUI gets scheduled for. I'm hoping I won't ov early on Femara...but it's a waiting game. I kind of wish we got as many scans as I did in the UK here in the US so I'd know what was going on in there....

Sounds like you and I are on the same schedule right now I am just I think 2 CD ahead of you but everything else the same. I hope I don't O to early too or that we miss it since my normal O time would be that weekend. Excited to hear how things work out for you

I have noticed that I am liking Femara WAY MORE then Clomid. I was so nasty on that and I had some of the worst hot flashes. I have felt pretty good on the Femara with only a couple hot flashes and only got edgey once with DH but was able to snap out of it pretty quickly.

Myshel... Any updates yet?

 

[KatO79]

Wow, Kat. Your friend does sound super selfish and like she wants all the attention she can get. I don't blame you for wanting a break from her. And the fact she's playing your DH like that...I'd keep a careful eye on her.



Good luck Myshel! I hope you have some great follies!!



AFM- Femara starts today! I'm super excited. My scan is next Wednesday and then I guess we'll see when the IUI gets scheduled for. I'm hoping I won't ov early on Femara...but it's a waiting game. I kind of wish we got as many scans as I did in the UK here in the US so I'd know what was going on in there....

Yes it really is too much. She's super manipulative. Although I think she's just using my DH for attention since he doesn't live up to her "model good looks" criteria of a man so she's not after him for herself. Plus he's a nice guy and she's attracted to men that treat her like dirt so no worries there. I truely believe she isn't in the slightest bit attracted to him and my DH would never cheat on me.

I actually managed to get him to go along with us taking a long break from her and then we'll see.

Here's hoping the Femara works for you

 

[Myshelsong]

Just got back from my scan. So far seeing one at 16 mm and four at 12 mm some at 10 mm all on the right side.

It appears the Gonal is slowing the fermera down to give me more follicles, normally by day nine i have one follicle at 20mm so hoping to grow these few fast. On daily scans now!

 

[KatO79]

Just got back from my scan. So far seeing one at 16 mm and four at 12 mm some at 10 mm all on the right side.

It appears the Gonal is slowing the fermera down to give me more follicles, normally by day nine i have one follicle at 20mm so hoping to grow these few fast. On daily scans now!

Sounds good Myshel Did they mention how many they think will mature for the IUI or do you find that out at a later scan?

 

[KatO79]

So just got back from the clinic and I have 2 follies, one on each side (first time for that). I think they measure 14 and 16 mm if I remember correctly She says I'm ready to trigger so tonight I take one more dose of Puregon tonight so the follies grow a bit more, Friday morning I trigger and Saturday morning they do the IUI. So just about 25 hours from trigger to IUI which I didn't reach to ask about since they normally have me trigger 36 hours before the IUI Maybe because I'd already Oed last time and they prefer to inseminate before O????

She says she has a good feeling about this time but could be wishful thinking on her part

 

[DBZ34]

AFM- Femara starts today! I'm super excited. My scan is next Wednesday and then I guess we'll see when the IUI gets scheduled for. I'm hoping I won't ov early on Femara...but it's a waiting game. I kind of wish we got as many scans as I did in the UK here in the US so I'd know what was going on in there....

Sounds like you and I are on the same schedule right now I am just I think 2 CD ahead of you but everything else the same. I hope I don't O to early too or that we miss it since my normal O time would be that weekend. Excited to hear how things work out for you

I have noticed that I am liking Femara WAY MORE then Clomid. I was so nasty on that and I had some of the worst hot flashes. I have felt pretty good on the Femara with only a couple hot flashes and only got edgey once with DH but was able to snap out of it pretty quickly.

Myshel... Any updates yet?

Nice! It'll be great to have a IUI buddy.

I usually ov on CD12, which would be Thurs according to FF or Friday according to my doc's office. So, I'm feeling a little worried about oving pre-IUI.

First dose of Femara down and so far so good. I'll hope I'm less hormonal and moody on it too.

I forget, how many days before the IUI do they say to abstain from BDing? Is it 48 hours?