~Mark of Love~ c-section mom/mum support group

[SLCMommy]

Most doctors in Minnesota where I was from planned the c-section for the day after your due date.

However, the doctor who delivered my first child wanted it to be exactly one week before my due date, to hopefully ensure I don't go into unplanned labor.

I think this question should be asked to your doctor, he/she will let you know

 

[AmaryllisRed]

Sounds like it really depends on the dr...
I'll have to ask her, if I can remember and get up the nerve. I just don't want to seem petty... Silly, I know.

 

[SLCMommy]

Naw, you won't seem petty at all. Ask her

 

[DarlingMe]

Sounds like it really depends on the dr...
I'll have to ask her, if I can remember and get up the nerve. I just don't want to seem petty... Silly, I know.

I would ask her, it depends on the situation too. If there is a risk for labor or keeping the baby in. It isnt petty and I am sure she is expecting you to ask!

 

[KellyC75]

Okay, a question for those who have had planned c-sections.

I am now 27 weeks and don't know my date for my section. I know some other ladies have said that they have already scheduled theirs. Will my dr be scheduling my section sometime soon or is it possible that she will wait until I get closer to term and watch baby's growth and then pick a date?
Do dr's ever do that?
I know my hospital won't do it before 39 weeks... but I'd like to know more specifically what day we're looking at, just so I can plan and prepare...

I was booked in for DD birth at my 14 week consultant app in the Uk! For 39 weeks

Just arrived in Australia & the Doctor has said I can have this LO at 38 weeks May wait for 39 weeks though, not sure yet?

 

[AmaryllisRed]

Hmmm... I wonder if it depends on the hospital whether they'll do it before 39 weeks or if pretty much all the hospitals in the US are that way. Not that I'm wanting to have it sooner... Honestly I'd like to do it as close to 40 weeks as possible if I knew I wouldn't go into labor before that. Cook this baby all the way through!!

 

[SLCMommy]

It all depends on your situation I think.

I've heard of doctors scheduling c-sections in the 36th, 37th & 38th weeks of pregnancy for woman who will be having their 5th,6th,7th,8th,9th (lol) c-section. Doctors are very afraid of uterine rupture & depending on your medical history, dr's might fear a woman is at higher chance for a natural uterine rupture.

My first OBGYN appointment is in a few days, I'll be just shy of 10 weeks. My DH wants me to talk to the doctor and see if it's possible for me to just pre-schedule/plan my c-section because his work is really competitive when it comes to vacation days off, and since I am due in July (the most vacation requested days off) it's even worse. In your opinion, would it be tacky to bring this up to my doctor this soon - and just explain that my DH would like to have that day off, but it's really competitive so the sooner I know, the better...or should I just wait until later in my pregnancy and cross fingers that DH can get that day off?

Thanks!

 

[RachA]

I don't think there is any harm in asking already. Get the ball rolling as it were.

 

[SLCMommy]

I don't think there is any harm in asking already. Get the ball rolling as it were.

Okay I just don't want to look weird or too silly lol!

 

[AmaryllisRed]

I think with the possible risks and disadvantages to a c-section, being able to plan ahead is one of the positives. So why not use it, you know? Can't hurt to ask.

 

[SLCMommy]

Okay. I'll ask.


.....Am I crazy, for deep down wanting to try vaginal? All my children were planned C-sections so I've never experienced labor. I know it's really hard to get a doctor to do a vbac after 3 c-sections, and my state actually has malpractice laws against any midwife or doctor assisting in a vaginal birth after three c-sections, in fact, in my state, the cut off is at two....legally!! So, once a woman has two c-sections, BOOM...that's it. The state will not let her try vaginal. My only option is to either go to a different state (which is not going to happen) or try a home birth which my DH and I have discussed, but a maternity ward RN warned me against. She said after having three different cuts in your uterus it gets really risky and even though she works in a state that doesn't have such strict malpractice laws, she herself has never seen a vbac after 3 c-sections.

On the bright side, I can make sure my husband is there with a planned c-sections.
On the down side, I guess I am still grieving or feel that I "missed out" and real labor.

 

[AmaryllisRed]

Awww. I'm sorry you feel that way...
There are probably women on here who would say it's your birth and if you want a vbac, do whatever it takes to get it.
I, however, am not one of those women.
Personally, I think it's just a lot easier to have a repeat section. My dr asked me if that's what I wanted, and I said yes, and then she went on to state some (probably overblown) statistic about the dangers of vbacs. It would bother some women, but not me, because that's what I had decided already.
It worries me that your state wouldn't even permit you to have a vbac. To me, that shows the danger of it.
I'm not saying that all women should start having c-sections for no reason. But in certain cases, I think a planned c-section is not only permissible, but wise.
Idk. I was in labor for.ev.er with DS and it stank big time. And nothing came of it. So I have no interest in doing THAT ever again.
Just my two cents.

 

[pichi]

i think after having 2 sections there is an increased risk is there not? i think the same goes for home births. i know what you mean by feeling like you missed out on the birth experience but at the end of the day as long as you are healthy and well, baby is healthy and well then you just have to tell yourself it doesn't matter how they entered the world you know? x

 

[Ozzieshunni]

I would have never chosen a c-section (not like I could have living in the UK, lol), but it was what was best for Alex's heart. I feel cheated though. I'm still thankful every day that he's here and healthy . In this case, my desires were secondary. Would I like a VBAC? Sure! Will it happen? Probably not as there's a 20% chance our next child will have the same heart condition.

 

[RachA]

I think there is always going to be a certain amount of felling loss at not experiencing a virginal birth. I hated my recovery after my section so much that the only way i'd of had another one would of been if i'd been told i 100% had to have one. I wanted to give a vbac a chance and i'm glad i did because it paid off and went really well (apart from the horrendous amount of stitches i had but that was soooooo my fault!).


You have to do what is safest for you and baby more definitely.

 

[majored]

I cant stop worring, someone please HELP!

Ive had 2 sections both emergency my son is 15 and my daughter is 12. I didnt plan on having any more children as my oh was ill and it would of been impossible to bring up another child.

Anyway ive got older and put on some weight. I split with my ex husband and have a new partner . He didnt have any kids and in the past he had tried IVF with his ex and it just never happened.

I wanted to have kids with him but thought we would have to try IVF. So i said i will loose the weight he can give up smoking and were try IVF before im 40.

Im 18 weeks pregnant now and we never got round to trying IVF it just happened naturally and it was a big shock when i found out, it took ages to just sink in. I then said to myself i would have to have another section and that was that!

My MW came round to see me and handed me a leaflet about birth after a section. So it would show me the options for natural or a planned section. Well i read it, then read it again, then again. Now everyday i think about it. and everyday it makes me cry. My MW said i could try for a natural birth if i wanted there was no reason for me not to. The information tells you of the downside of natural birth & section after a previous section. So this information is ment to help you pick, what birth is the best. Well the way it comes across just sort of says either way is bad. The way i read it both are dangerous, both are not good, both have problems. It seems from this nobody can have a good birth after a section its all doom and gloom. There are no postitive sides to birth. I know everything has a risk. I wont go into detail with what it said as i cant seem to think about it because i will start to cry.

I know it may seem silly as ive been there twice before. however because ive seen it wrote in black/white its in the back of my mind.

I now feel i have something inside me and its got to come out but either way it will be dangerous i feel i have no options and both ways will end up giving me problems or worse. I can not enjoy this pregnancy, i cant relax, i worry about it everyday. I have to keep telling myself 1000's people give birth everyday, people have sections everyday.

If my oh sees me crying he gets cross after a while, as nothing he says can stop the thoughts going through my head. I cry and wipe away my tears before anyone sees.

Im sorry to be on a downer im just in a right mess over this.

Sarah x

 

[RachA]

Quite honestly I think we are given at to much info into what can go wrong. All births are risky but you shouldn't of been made to feel as if whichever way you chose its going to go wrong. I jnow quite a few women who have had sections and then vbac and have had no problems at all.

I think you really need to speak to someone in the medical profession about this as its causing you undue worry

 

[SLCMommy]

With me, I could of had VBACS in Minnesota but the "deal" was that I had to go into labor, naturally before my due dates.

...And, my kids HUNG ON. So, of course, I had the sections. lol

With my first pregnancy, I had GD, high BP, preecamplisa & my daughters head wasn't in the birth canal...her neck was actually underneath my pelvic bone. My OBGYN said (while she was pulling her out) that even if I were to have tried natural with her, I would of laid in labor and nothing would of happened, & she probably would of gone into distress. So, even though my first was a planned c-section due to my health - I know in the long run I would of been a c-section anyways.

I also think you are right, the fact my state has laws against it does light a lightbulb. I mean, sure, my state is already ultra-conservative, but I think they have that in place to protect children & moms.

I guess, in away, c-section moms have their own "labor pains" so-to-speak...which is the healing afterwords LOL

 

[DarlingMe]

With me, I could of had VBACS in Minnesota but the "deal" was that I had to go into labor, naturally before my due dates.

...And, my kids HUNG ON. So, of course, I had the sections. lol

With my first pregnancy, I had GD, high BP, preecamplisa & my daughters head wasn't in the birth canal...her neck was actually underneath my pelvic bone. My OBGYN said (while she was pulling her out) that even if I were to have tried natural with her, I would of laid in labor and nothing would of happened, & she probably would of gone into distress. So, even though my first was a planned c-section due to my health - I know in the long run I would of been a c-section anyways.

I also think you are right, the fact my state has laws against it does light a lightbulb. I mean, sure, my state is already ultra-conservative, but I think they have that in place to protect children & moms.

I guess, in away, c-section moms have their own "labor pains" so-to-speak...which is the healing afterwords LOL

I hate hearing that I "took the easy way" or women acting like you lose your badge of honor for delivering via c-section, I was still pregnant for 9 months, still had to deliver, and recover- probably for several more weeks than a vaginal delivery! It is so strange that people see a c-section as no big deal...

 

[KellyC75]

SLCMommy & majored, I think you really need to work out why you had csections before....

I strongly believe that my csections were because my pelvis is a 'odd' shape, all my LOs were back to back & brow presentation (I also seem to have big babys too!)....So these reasons alone meant my after my 2nd csection, I would always go for another one...

I share the same feelings of 'wishing I had experienced a natural birth'......But above & beyond all that, I am so very grateful that all my LO's were born safely (it was a close call with DS1)

Good luck Girls