Money worries

[orange-sox]

Well I'm in a complete mess with money at the moment.

I've had to take a pay cut due to the economic climate, so I'm only making approx £550 a month... £500 of which is supposed to go to my mother on rent, how on earth am I supposed to pay my bills and food on £50 a month?

She just won't listen to me when I say I can't afford to give her what she's asking for, she simply says "Well that's fine, I'll go bankcrupt then, and you'll be homeless, you're so fecking useless just like your father, you get such an easy ride here you're paying the bare minimum etc etc"... personally I don't think £500 a month is the bare minimum, it's crippling me and I'm so stressed about it all the time.

I just want to crawl into a hole and die at the moment

 

[faun]

£500 a month for rent to your mum is a lot you could probably rent your own 2 bed house for that where i live. If you don't pay her that much will she kick you out? Do you have anywhere else you could stay for a while that would be cheaper? If it's just you lots of people rent out rooms in their homes all bills included, my friend lives with an elderly couple she has her own room, bathroom and kitchen and she pays £300 all bills included. I know you would need more space when baby arrives but it would give you a chance to get your finances in order.

 

[Char&Bump-x]

You can rent a 1 bedroom flat here for about 400, sometimes even less! Thats terrible. I hope you can sort something out soon, its horrible to be stressed over anything, let alone money!

xx

 

[Sara-Rose89]

£500 pound is quite alot, my 3 bedroomed house is 380 a month lol and the area is nice, close to everything shops bus etc
x

 

[lorrilou]

Jesus, £500 is a hell of alot of money. My sis, who is 20 and works, only pays my mum £25 a week. You could rent your own place for that.

I really think you need to see about getting out of there huni, its not doing you or baby any good at all. Hope things get better for you soon. xx

 

[Ema]

Bloody hell 500 a month and its not your own place??

Thats a hell of alot of money. XxX

 

[missjess]

£500?? holy crap ! xx

 

[sparkswillfly]

I can only echo what everyone else has said £500 is ridiculous. I paid £30 a week to my mum when I was at home and she fed me. And my mum is tight! lol. you could rent a double room in london for what you pay. I would tell her to shove it and move out. Shell miss the money... selfish cow

 

[Char&Bump-x]

Yea i'm only paying £15 a week, and although i dont work now i was paying the same when i did!

The way my mum does it is she was getting her £18 child benefit for me which stopped at 18, so i'm basicaly just paying her that

x

 

[nightkd]

£500 I have just started paying £100 to cover my mum's lost housing benefit + rent etc.... That's ridiculous, you could get your own house for that! Seriously!

x

 

[orange-sox]

She's a very controlling person, and expects me to take on the responsibilities that were my dads, I worked all through school etc to pay for my food and clothings plus some rent.

I don't really know how to explain it... she's got a few credit cards that have really really high balances and for some reason she blames me for the spending on it... not thinking that she's the person who's been out spending all this money... when she gets a statement she'll highlight the things that she says I've bought and 9/10 of the items aren't anything to do with me (for instance she said I'd bought something in our local town, when I was 1000s of miles away in Istanbul!?!)

I'm at my wits end with her, and I know for a fact this stress isn't doing me any good... all she ever does is moan at me - she treats me like a slave in this house, I cook, clean, doing the laundry, walk the dog, buy all the groceries, walk the dog etc and she doesn't appreciate one single bit of it, and then picks on one element when I might have dropped the ball... like forgetting to dust a shelf of something.

I just don't know what the hell to do anymore

 

[sparkswillfly]

Honestly the best thing to do is to get out of there. Speak to your local housing benefit department because you are on a low income and should be entitled to help. Dont worry about her debt and problems shes not worrying about you. Best thing to do is go to citizens advice and they will be able to advise you on everything you could be entitled to, to help you get out. You could apply for a loan from the job centre to help with a deposit on a flat for example. The sooner you get out of there the better...

 

[Eoz]

AWW hun.Get on to the council.Get your own place.Your mum is taking the mick out of you.My 1st place was a studio flat and was 350 all inclusive.Once baby comes you'll be entilted to a lot more benefits so you should cope ok.As for me I'm paying £925 rent plus bills and it is crippling me!!!

 

[Char&Bump-x]

I agree, get out! With my council they will pay housing benifit for you towards a privately rented place if you have a low income, worth a look?

x

 

[Abz1982]

MOVE!! Your mother is ripping you of big style! My oh and I are about to get a 2 bed flat, adn the rent for that is only £64 a WEEK! Plus council tax ans bill will still be LESS than £500.

What does your mother think you will be givin gher once you are on maternity leave? Is she planning on demanding your benefits from you? I know she is your mother, but that is emotional abuse the way she is treating you.

Call her bluff. Say you are moving out and apply to the council. She will be fine! She wont lose her house I bet, nor will she declare herself bankrupt. She is just playing on your emotions.

 

[kitty1987]

why on earth would she make you pay £500 a month! Me and 2 mates share a house and pay £165 each which I think is still quite expensive for a 3 bed house. My sis has moved back in with my mum and dad since she had her baby and she only pays £30 a month and buys whatever food she wants

 

[mama2b]

You need to get out of there now ! £500 a month is ridiculous, even including bills its outrageous !

It sounds like you are paying for the both of you, get down the council first of all and see what help they can give you, even if you don't get a council house you will be entitled to help with private rented accommodation, I seriously think for your own sake you need to move out of your mums asap !!

 

[Dream.A.Dream]

I agree with everybody else hun. £500 a month is ridiculous! You could easily have your own place for that. Perhaps you should start looking into moving out? As someone else said, your mothers debt is not your problem. You and your baby are your number one priority xx

 

[ProudSkinPapa]

She's a very controlling person, and expects me to take on the responsibilities that were my dads, I worked all through school etc to pay for my food and clothings plus some rent.

I don't really know how to explain it... she's got a few credit cards that have really really high balances and for some reason she blames me for the spending on it... not thinking that she's the person who's been out spending all this money... when she gets a statement she'll highlight the things that she says I've bought and 9/10 of the items aren't anything to do with me (for instance she said I'd bought something in our local town, when I was 1000s of miles away in Istanbul!?!)

I'm at my wits end with her, and I know for a fact this stress isn't doing me any good... all she ever does is moan at me - she treats me like a slave in this house, I cook, clean, doing the laundry, walk the dog, buy all the groceries, walk the dog etc and she doesn't appreciate one single bit of it, and then picks on one element when I might have dropped the ball... like forgetting to dust a shelf of something.

I just don't know what the hell to do anymore

Start looking into other housing options, there are many options out there, but you should have something lined up before you really confront her on it, you don't want to be out on the street with nowhere to go.

Once you have another option lined up, return the favor. Give her a bill for services rendered, as the primary chef, and maid, I'd say you are entitled a certain amount of money back. She won't pay, of course, but you will make your point, and there is always the chance she will get that point instead of throwing you out on your own.

You may also want to consider that it may not be best to have your child in an abusive environment. Children can grow up dirt poor and come out of it perfectly normal and healthy, but emotional abuse is harder to get over.

 

[Always&4ever]

I agree with the others, move out hun, tell her where to shove it