mum and baby groups**eurgh rant moan**

[milkmachine]

ive started going to a bump+baby group at a surestart centre and i really hate it i feel so judged when i go, they are all older and going back to work soon (theres only like 4 mums and me that go)

they look at me funny when i breastfeed, i have NOTHING to talk to with these women they are all about to go back to work have fantastic husbands nice cars dress their babies in designer gear and theres me in the corner tattooed shy hippy dippy in the corner...

i feel so left out...

i know its important for faith to go and get used to other babies, its on again in the morning and im seriously thinking about not going anymore... are all groups like this?? how do you find them?

 

[jen1604]

Have you tried looking at baby groups on netmums or they have meet-a-mum boards on there so you can find other mums near you with little ones.
Or have you asked your HV about local groups?xx

 

[ryder]

Just look for other groups.. Not everyone has the right chemistry to get along...

 

[brownhairedmom]

Mine isn't like that AT ALL

 

[jackiea85]

I've only been to 1 so far but it was very busy so there were plenty of people there. Maybe u could find a bigger group so its easier to avoid people like that. I think smaller groups would prob be a bit cliquey anyway, I wouldn't take it too personally

 

[Leanne&Bump..x]

i found that too

 

[jen1604]

Sorry hon,Ophelia was screaming..I can give you a proper answer now.
You will find somewhere you like,it just might take a bit of searching.Dont worry if you dont find anywhere at first,Im sure there will be a few groups in your area.
As I said,netmums is great.It has lots of ladies on there and it has sections for groups too. Im not sure if Im meant to post a link as it is kind of another forum?Maybe you could make your own post on the meet-a-mums board saying the kind of mummys youre hoping to meet up with?
Your HV should know a few groups in your area too.It would definitely be worth saying youre not settling in the group youve found and ask if she can recommend any others.
Good luck!Let us know how it goes xx

 

[jenstar]

Some are better than others, just keep looking until you find one with mums you like!

Also about breastfeeding, they might just be interested. I wouldn't take that too personally if you can! At my breastfeeding club I used to go to we all looked at each other and we were all breastfeeding mums!

 

[sparkswillfly]

I was going to start going to one next week. I really hope mines not like that... I suspect it will be. My antenatal classes were all women in their 30s

 

[alio]

ive started going to a bump+baby group at a surestart centre and i really hate it i feel so judged when i go, they are all older and going back to work soon (theres only like 4 mums and me that go)

they look at me funny when i breastfeed, i have NOTHING to talk to with these women they are all about to go back to work have fantastic husbands nice cars dress their babies in designer gear and theres me in the corner tattooed shy hippy dippy in the corner...

i feel so left out...

i know its important for faith to go and get used to other babies, its on again in the morning and im seriously thinking about not going anymore... are all groups like this?? how do you find them?

Jesus!! I feel the same..... Designer Mums!! Ha ha!! I can't understand why people think we'll all get on just cos we have kids....... I'm with you honey.... I always feel like the weirdo in the corner in a beret and some quirky quirk! Shame we don't live nearer! xx

 

[milkmachine]

ive found another group thats on twice a month, am half thinking about setting up my own group lol!

ive tried joining net mums but they dont have a thing for near me the nearest i can get is islington?!

 

[milkmachine]

Some are better than others, just keep looking until you find one with mums you like!

Also about breastfeeding, they might just be interested. I wouldn't take that too personally if you can! At my breastfeeding club I used to go to we all looked at each other and we were all breastfeeding mums!

they dont look interested they look offended... they all look at me then start talking to eachother ignoring me cause im breastfeeding

 

[jen1604]

ive found another group thats on twice a month, am half thinking about setting up my own group lol!

I actually did this so give me a yell if you need any tips or help.
If I was you I would join the netmums nearest to you then post on the meet-a-mums board looking for mummys near you xx

 

[milkmachine]

i wouldnt know where to start lol my house is big enough to host a small baby group...

 

[jen1604]

I put an advert on netmums,printed leaflets and asked my HV if I could leave them at my baby clinic and I chased random cool looking ladies in the street to give them leaflets.
Then if you wanted to do it at somewhere like starbucks go in a coupla days before and just let them know youre going to be bringing in a big group and ask if any tables can be reserved.
Its about word of mouth really so its a good idea to get your health visitor backing you as obviously shes going to see the most mums!
xx

 

[taperjeangirl]

Oh i hear ya!

i went to one last Friday (have been meaning to update my thread on it) and I WONT be going back to that one!

There was one mum who lives a few doors away from me and she drove up in her massive Land Rover (we live in a town) and the baby group is max 10 minute walk from my house.....no wonder the bloody enviroment is gubbed!

Then all the mums seemed to be in groups ....like you said, the designer ones...... the gossiping ones...... and the ones that go to have other people watch their kids so they can sit on their mobile phones for the hour pr sit outside smoking...

I sat with the gossiping ones but I can't be arsed with that either!

I'm trying another one this week, so here's hoping! Don't give up Molly you will find one eventually!

 

[sparkle]

Mine isn't like that but I did go to a really horrid one first. I was there for 40 mins and not one person spoke to me. I just left!
I agree with the netmums idea, met some lovely Mummies locally!

 

[BlackBerry25]

That is why I never have gone. I just am assuming it will be filled with designer moms. I think starting your own is a great idea!

 

[Rachiebaby24]

me too....only i got looked at because i was feeding maley a BOTTLE! (oh my god!!!!!!! what kind of mother am i!!!! lol) no-one spoke to me either and i tried to talk but getting one word answers....then when i got out Maley's lunch i got "are you weaning her already!!!??? she is tiny???!!"......er...yeah actually...

i never went back.....fair enough that i dont expect to get on with everyone but they all knew each other and could have at least made me feel welcome.....

and they kept calling Maley "Marley" even after i corrected them....bitches

 

[keelykat]

i hated my local surestart one too! i go to one at a church now, loads more welcoming and friendly.

keely.