Mums/Moms after Recurrent Losses (MARL) - Come join us!

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[bumpyplease]

Hi girls how is everyone? I've been reading just not had a chance to post. My dad is still in intensive care but improving so any spare time I have I am up the hospital.

So glad you are joining us cazi Freya is gorgeous!!

Heart interesting you should say about silent reflux. Alfie will sleep laying down but especially at night he's quite restless and fairly unsettled and I've noticed he's started to make grunting noises. I wonder if he has it. Do you have to see the doc to get it diagnosed? Does medication help?

Jen glad the breast lump wasn't serious. Puppy are you ok babe? Hope the kids are feeling better.

Davies how long did it take for Lexi to sleep that long!! I can't wait for that time feeling seriously sleep deprived at the moment. And i know she is older and bigger but what us her feeding schedule out of interedt? A is taking 3 oz every 3 hours but was lasting nearly 4 hours so think I'm gonna start him on 4oz from today. He stays downstairs until we go to bed but thankfully seems quite happy in his Moses basket at night time.

He was a month old yesterday - it's going so quick! And I got him weighed on Friday at 4 weeks and he is now 7lb so we can finally try out his newborn clothes instead of the tiny baby stuff lol!!!

Hope you got a better nights sleep last night croy? Glad Tim is being better heart! How are you finding working hopeful? Bet you are shattered?

Hi to everyone else x x x

 

[filipenko32]

Bumps I'm sorry your dad is so poorly

So pleased Alfie is getting to be a big boy!

 

[sara1]

Just dropping by to say hello to all our inspirational PARL graduates! Hope mommyhood is treating you all well and I wish you all some seriously well-deserved extra sleep!

 

[heart tree]

Bumpy, I suspected reflux from a lot of things. First it was the grunting at night and the fact that she was visibly uncomfortable. Then I started noticing that she would arch her back after every feeding. She was also constantly trying to feed/nurse at one point. I thought she was hungry, but then she would pull away from the bottle or breast and cry. I also could hear her stomach contents make its way up her throat and move back down. Finally, she gets a LOT of hiccups every day. Like 3-4 times a day. I started googling and found out they are all symptoms of silent reflux. The desire to constantly feed/nurse is a way to soothe the heartburn, but it can also cause more of a burn as well.

Do meds work? Hard to say. We had her on Zantac which helped for a while a little bit. It is like Tums in that it neutralizes the acid. But then we noticed she got worse. So now she's on Prevacid which stops the acid pumps from turning on in her stomach. I've noticed an improvement, but it isn't cured by any means. She still is visibly uncomfortable and I can't lie her down on her back for long periods of time without her spitting up or starting to grunt.

I basically diagnosed it and told her pediatrician that she had it. I also insisted on the meds. It is VERY common in preemies, so I wouldn't be surprised if Alfie has it. It usually goes away on it's own, but it can be anywhere from 4-6 months to 1-2 years. Some things you can try before meds are elevating the head side of his cot, burping him frequently throughout his feedings (like every ounce that he drinks, stop him and try to burp him), keep him upright for 20 - 30 minutes after he eats, feed him smaller amounts more frequently. None of these are easy to do on a day to day basis though.

As for sleep, I've been told that the more they weigh, the more they sleep. I've found this to be true for Delilah. She is still napping. It's a 3 hour nap so far! She just started this regular long afternoon nap yesterday. I hope it's here to stay. I just took a nap myself. She also started sleeping 5-6 hour stretches at night about a month or so ago. She's almost 11 pounds now. It will happen. I promise. I was just thinking back to how hard the first few weeks were once we got her home. I can honestly say, I hated them. The sleep deprivation was horrible. I'm really glad we are past them. Soon enough, you will be too.

Wow to 4 oz! Delilah still only takes in 3 oz when we bottle feed her. We've tried more, but she gets too full. She is gaining perfectly, and she hasn't seemed hungry afterwards, so we haven't adjusted it.

I'm sorry to hear about your dad. It must be a very bittersweet time right now.

Fili and Sara, can't wait for you to get your cute selves over here with your cute little babies!

Tracie, what did you remove?

 

[croydongirl]

Amanda- Levi does the desperate to nurse, but can't latch properly or arches his back and pulls away (without letting go, Ouch@@++!!) when he is distressed at night. He doesn't cry or get uncomfortable in the day but at night he seems like a different baby all together. He sleeps fine in the swing in the day and we thought it was because of the motion but we are now thinking it is the angle.

He also gets lots of hiccups which make him mad!

Not sure what other symptoms he might have that i just thought were normal baby behaviour.

He was prescribed 0.6ml twice a day of Zantac, the is only the first full day on it so we will see if it helps him tonight. Last night he settled better was still up quite a few times. He won't be swaddled so I think his flailing arms don't help him

 

[heart tree]

How much does he weigh? It might not be a high enough dose I'm sorry to say. By the time they are 10 lbs, they should be getting about 1.5 mls 2x a day.

You might not notice the effects of Zantac right away. And it needs to be constantly adjusted for weight.

Sounds like he might have it, but who knows. And yes, Delilah gets really mad with her hiccups.

My girl just took a 4 hour nap! At one point I didn't know what to do with myself so just watched her sleep. Surely I could have been a little more constructive with my time! LOL!

 

[croydongirl]

thanks for the tip. he weighs 12ls now, I'll mention it to the doc on Wednesday see if she wants to up the dose.

Levi has been sleeping all day so I am a bit nervous about tonight! I hope that whole sleep begets sleep thing is true!

Good job Delilah! I always look at Levi's bright smile after he sleeps a long stretch and tell him, "see how good it feels!" I hope it will sink in soon! haha!

I am hoping that soon we'll have more of a predictable routine, I know that it's best for him. Even it doesn't look like any one elses routine. I need his feeding to be on more of a schedule. I am wondering if I use pumped milk and formula to go through a day or two with mostly bottles to get him full at each feed and get him hungry on a schedule. Then I hope he would eat more predictably through the day? Right now it feels like he is napping or on the boob with a little play time in between, then back on the boob for a snack to put him to sleep. He will fall asleep in the swing by himself if I put him down tired, but not in the bassinet at night.

I know he is only little, I need to stop over thinking...I am sure my anxiety is a lot of his issue at night.

I was also reading that they shouldn't be awake longer than 2 hours at a time or they get overstimulated. In the evenings he is awake for long periods of time because hubby is home from work and wants to play. I think tonight we are having a mandatory mid evening nap and see if that helps at bedtime.

 

[heart tree]

Croy I feed Delilah basically on demand, but it ends up being every 2-3 hours usually. She is awake for play time much more now. We put her on an activity mat and she loves it. I can also put her in her bouncy chair and she will watch me in the kitchen, fold laundry, etc. I think he needs a little more time to get a little older. It happened right around the 2 month mark that she became more alert and interactive. I also read about trying not to keep them awake more than 2 hours. But she has definitely gone longer. Sometimes I've found it makes her crankier, others I think it makes her fall asleep faster and stay asleep longer.

You could try putting him on a schedule. Just be careful about giving him all bottles. It might disrupt your milk supply, even if you pump throughout the day. I know it affects mine.

 

[bumpyplease]

Thanks for the info and tips heart, the arching the back the hiccups I can relate to it all!! We already elevate his head at night And I've started to wind more often throughout a feed so will see how it goes. I have my 6 week check up next week so will mention it then. Croy I'm the same as you A will sleep perfectly in the day and settles really easily in his chair but at night he struggles to settle. I often wonder if he sleeps too much in the day!

Last night was tough! He woke for a feed at 2am and would not settle until 4.15am then wanted feeding again at 5.30am! He didn't seem in pain just wide awake and restless!!!! I realised today that he is 4 and a half weeks old and I haven't had 1 day time nap yet!!!! No wonder I'm tired!! I struggle to sleep in the day but today I'm gonna force myself to nap!!

I hate to moan as I was reading up about ruptured uteruses last night and it made me realise how lucky I am to have a healthy baby. It's very rare and in a lot of the cases the baby doesn't make it or the mother has to have a hysterectomy so I'm so thankful for everything!!

Hi Sara, fili, can't wait for you to join us!!

Hope the rest of you yummy mummy's are doing well?

Xx

 

[hoping:)]

Davies- Penny also has a strawberry birth mark at the base of her neck and it has already started to fade. It sounds like you have a good little sleeper on your hands. When we first moved Penny to her own room I would try to put her down upstairs but sometimes that didn’t always work. Now she goes down at 8:30 and I get some me & Tim time down stairs. I think I got af 2 months after birth but a couple weeks before I got bad af cramps on and off and a few spotting incidents.

Puppycat- I’m sorry to hear it is taking some time for your DH to bond with Samuel. I think the other girls may be right about the jealousy thing. I hope it gets better!

Croy- the other girls are right about the weight gain. Don’t sweat it as long as he is happy and content. Breast fed babies put on the weight slower than formula fed babies. There are all sorts of things you have to factor in as well like growth spurts, activity and bowl movements. It sounds like you are doing everything possible for your little guy. I think all of us mommies let our anxiety get the best of us. I had to laugh at your tweezer story. You would think pregnancy brain ends when the baby is born but it only gets worse and morphs into mommy brain!

I hope Levi gets back to his sleep schedule. Penny had some stints of rough nights and then between 4 months and 8/9months she started waking once in the night but now she sleeps like a champ… I probably just jinxed myself. We started a routine at 4 months once she was in her own room.

Jenny- Oh gosh. I hope you are doing ok, hun. Its been one thing after another. Feel better soon!

Hearty- You definitely did see me with a glass of champagne on FB… actually I had a couple glasses! It was super yummy.

I’m sorry you are still struggling with Tim on parenting. Maybe he is not feeling confident in his parenting abilities at the moment because she is still so little so he leaves it up to you since you seem like you have everything covered? My Tim told me when he thought of having a baby he pictured the toddler stage and not so much the newborn part so he had to adjust. In the early days I was better at staying calm if Penny wouldn’t settle but if it ever got overwhelming Tim would swoop in and take over. His grandmother and all the women in my family were surprised about how involved Tim was in taking care of Penny. I never had to ask him to change a diaper or make a bottle… he just did it. Bath time is another story though because I always do it. If I left it up to him she would bathe once a month! Your DH is going to have so much fun with her as she gets older. Tim is amazing with Penny and sometimes can calm her faster than I can which makes me a little sad but they definitely have that father, daughter bond and love playing with each other. I think what helped us in the beginning is that we both confessed that we didn’t really know what we were doing so we relied on each other greatly. I always asked for his advice and he did the same. I really think it will get better for both of you as she gets older especially when she grows out of her reflux. I can’t imagine how hard that is on top of all the other stuff. It does sound like sleeping apart could be adding to the feeling of disconnect as well. We moved Penny into her own room at 4 months which makes it much easier to reconnect and have alone time. It definitely gets better!

I hope you had fun on your day trip !

Cazi- Welcome and congrats on your little girl!!! She is very precious and looks like she has a full head of hair. October babies are the best

Bumpy- I’m sorry to hear your dad is still in ICU but it is great he is making some progress. Happy belated one month to your little guy!

Its so nice to see all the expectant mommies in this thread! It won’t be long until you are all holding your rainbow babies

AFM- we had lots of fun at a fall festival this weekend. Penny got to go on a hay ride, barrel ride and completed her 1st ever corn maze! She even got licked by a baby calf and jumped in a bounce house!

 

[croydongirl]

Thank you all so much for your reassurance. Yesterday I let him eat and sleep when he wanted and he went down WAY easier and then slept much better too. I am feeling a wave of affirmation and relief!

Hopeful - that fall festival sounds fun. I am sad we will be missing or church's fall festival because we leave for Florida that day. I wanted to take some cute pics of Levi i his penguin costume. We are heading to the pumpkin patch this weekend with some friends and I look forward to taking picture there. A friend just gave me a bag of clothes from their kids and there was an adorable orange and black outfit with a pumpkin on the butt, it says Mommy's little pumpkin. Perfect for fall pictures in the corn maze.

I just pulled out Levi's baby book and have started filling it out. I love looking at the one my mum filled out for me. My poor brother, he had one but it didn't have much filled out! I love the things that can record this time before we forget because of sleep deprivation!

 

[puppycat]

Hey ladies, interesting to see all the chatter about reflux. Samuel was diagnosed with reflux at 16days but this wkend we were in hospital from Sunday to Thursday (see journal!) And he didnt have his Gaviscon at all. Tbh i'm not 100% that it is reflux now, i'm thinking maybe with his tongue tie he was taking in too much air and that looked like reflux but it's largely gone now?

Bf mums, does LO clamp down on your nipple and hurt you? X

 

[croydongirl]

Puppy - Glad you are home again and Samuel is doing better, how worrying for you. I am not 100% that Levi has reflux either, we decided to do it for 2 weeks and see if it imporved, the doctor said it may take that long to really see anything. Of course Wednesday he had his 2 month shots and so yesterday he was really sad and uncomfortable so I had to give him Tylenol and so I guess his sleeping was off anyway so we'll have to wait and see if the zantac makes a difference now hes feeling back to normal.

Levi clamps on me sometimes, he has bad gas and when he gets a gas pain while eating he arches his back and pushes out, but he stays attaches to me! Ouch, I never knew my nipple was so stretchy! It looks like a cartoon the way he stretches it out and then it pops back!! haha! That hurts too. I know when he is just eating to suck rather than to eat because he refuses to do a full widemouth latch and just wants to nipple chomp. I gice him a few chomps but then I take him off.

TOmorrow I have a really early start because its the families of multiples fall sale. Are the sales happening in other States too? I feel like last time they were on the same day. Anyway, hubby is teaching a class tomorrow morning so my in-laws are coming with me. They are coming to the house at 7am!! I think Levi and I may both be shopping in our PJ's !!

TGIF ladies, I thought we had escaped any reaction from the shots but it was just delayed to the next day because yesterday he was so sad and couldn't settle to sleep longer than about 10 minutes at a time. Poor baby He is napping now, so I hope that is a good sign. Who knows?!

 

[filipenko32]

Croy that made me laugh and wince at the same time re Levi stretching out your nipple!! Ouch indeed! Black humour!

all. I'm just reading, looking at pics and not posting much hope you don't mind! Xxx

 

[bumpyplease]

Quiet on here....hope everyone's ok? This mummy business takes up a lot of time doesn't it?!!!! Wouldnt swap it for anything though!!!

Quick question for those ladies that had a c sec....if you had dissolvable stitches how long did they take to dissolve? I've had mine nearly 6 weeks and they are still there especially at either end of my wound. Wasn't sure if this was normal or not as I would have expected them to dissolve by now!! Will ask at docs next week but thought I would ask on here as well!!

 

[croydongirl]

My c-sec scar was under a lip of skin, so by the time I could see it again the stitches were gone. So I am not sure how long they took exactly, but by 8 weeks they were gone for sure. I am sure that you are just fine, some probably take longer to heal than others because of where they are on your body, it makes sense that the edge ones would heal slower because they are in the more normal skin where as the middle ones would have been directly in the wound that would be healing. Does that make sense?

So the time is coming, we leave for Florida on Saturday. I am making a packing list today. And starting to pray hard that Levi does ok on the flight. I am nervous. I am not the best traveller on normal days, I get really anxious, not about flying so much but about leaving home and travelling in general. So we'll see how it works with a baby. Eeek!

 

[hopeful23456]

Bumpy- I don't think I had dissolvable stitches outside? You would think they would be gone though.
I'm totally exhausted, both babies sick from daycare so no they can't go to daycare until they are better but then they will probably get sick again.
I wish I could be a stay at home mom but now dh doesn't have a job and is out looking. It's horribly stressful.
I'm working from home until the are better. It's bronchiolitis, fevers. Coughing. It's horrible. Dh is sick too now.

Haven't slept longer than 3-4 hours at a time since before they were born. Lately it's been less than 1 hour at a time just a few sleeps a night.
It's getting to me.

 

[heart tree]

Sorry I've been MIA. I concur that it's stressful. Jodi you sound exhausted. You have way too much on your plate. I haven't been getting a lot of sleep either with just one, and I'm not working! I wish there was something I could suggest that would help. I hope your husband gets a good job very soon.

Croy good luck traveling!

We still haven't decided if I'm going back to work. Haven't found a nanny we love and they are very expensive. We are also thinking about buying a house and are in the process of getting preapproved for a loan. We are trying to do it on one income with the possibility of me babysitting one child a few days a week to help with money. I will miss my job terribly if I don't go back. And it might be career suicide. But at the same time, I can't envision someone caring for my girl while I work only to have a couple hundred dollars extra from my job.

I'm stressed in a different way Jodi. It's really hard to be a mom!

 

[bumpyplease]

Thanks for the stitches advice girls!

Croy have a dab trip, I hope Levi is a good boy for mummy!!

Oh Jodi that sounds horrible you poor thing, hugs sweetie! I'm not looking forward to when A starts to get sick it's hard enough anyway like heart says! I hope your DH finds a job soon, it all sounds very stressful.

Heart good luck with the house hunt x