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Oh Kat we've all been there. Its not easy at all and sometimes there's absolutely nothing we can do for them :( don't feel bad xx
 
Have to read back but kat- how about the automatic bouncing bouncer by bright starts ingenuity? Ava loved it! I got it in Craig's list but its at babies r us

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0032B0FI6
 
Kat- don't beat yourself up hun. Like Pups said, we've all been there. There have been times when I've been rocking a screaming Eva in her glider with tears pouring down my face, trying desperately to hold it together. Like you guys our go-to solution is t he boob and when that fails to soothe her it's hell. One thing thatwe've had quite a bit of success with is white noise- I put Eva upright in her sling, pressed close against my chest, then turn the extractor fan on full blast and gently rock her. Once she'stops wailing I try to get her to take a paci. I've spent hours standing in front of the stove, but it does work.
Remember, you are a wonderful mother and Grey loves you no matterwhat!!

Loving all the gorgeous pics!!
 
Kat it's true, we've all been there. Just last night, Delilah was up at 1am then at 3am. I was getting used to her sleeping through the night, so I wasn't pleased that she was up. At the 3am wake, I told her I wasn't happy in a cross voice. I felt horrible afterward and gave her snuggles. In the early days I found myself in tears often, wondering the same thing "what have I done?" It's a natural response to a stressful, sleep deprived situation.

I think we are led to believe that as mothers we will know exactly what our babies need. When they cry and cry and don't want anything we can offer, it sets us up to feel like failures. This is false thinking. We aren't failures at all. We are figuring them out. They are figuring us out. They are also new to the world. My mom told me something helpful. Babies don't have nuanced ways of expressing themselves. So when they are upset about a wet diaper they might scream just as loud as when they are upset about being hungry or wanting to be held. They have one way to express themselves and often it is dramatic.

It gets easier. It gets easier. It gets easier. I promise, promise, promise.

Is anyone else stalking FB for Fili's pics? I'm DYING to see Lexi!!!
 
Thanks Ladies for all the support and for admitting your own lost tempers and feelings of "what have i done?". It means a lot to me and has helped me be softer on myself.

My goal tonight is to roll with it. We might have found something that soothes Grey. We have been drying out his bellybutton stump with the hair dryer (it is such an innie that the inner part does not get dry unless we peal the skin away and aim the dryer at it). While he is nursing, each time we run the hairdryer and blow air on his belly, he falls asleep. We are going to see if this works when he cries. I so appreciate all of your support.

Hopeful,
I want an automatic bouncer, but Grey needs a vigorous bounce to settle down. I literally jog around the house sometimes. Thanks for the input.

Tuckie,
Is your mattress firm? If I continue to family bed every night, we need a firmer mattress. We have a heavenly pillowtop.

Croy,
Levi is so yummy. I could just eat him in his jumper and with his little outfit. He is so big now. Thanks for the reminder to just put Grey down and calm down. So far DH is always here, but I will remember that when he is not that it is okay for Grey to cry for a bit.

Sara,
You only have another month to go, before the dreaded 4th trimester comes to an end. I imagined you in front of the exhaust fan. How did DH respond, if at all, to your email? How are you?

Heart,
Thanks for your response. I took it to heart.
 
Ladies, meet Lexi Jasmine Penko :haha:
https://i145.photobucket.com/albums/r232/daphnetiger/7F37F25A-30B5-45F4-B3F0-F91067C485C0-3768-0000047AD629B4B0.jpg
 
Little stunner!! Well done fili!!!

Kat I wish I could come And give you a big hug...you too Sara!!! Kat I've been there too in fact I'm sure we all have so don't feel bad babe xx

Heart I'm with you - must have jinxed it by saying Alfie sleeps 12 hours he was wide awake fussing at 5am this morning and would not settle!!!! This then caused fighting with the OH as he was moaning about having to get up for work in a few hours time!

And in other news Alfie rolled for the first time on Monday on his 4 month birthday front to back. He looked quite pleased with himself for accomplishing that!!! He keeps trying since Monday and sometimes he succeeds and sometimes he doesn't!!!

Davies how old is lexi now? you need a mummy ticker lol!!!! could it be shes not quite ready and maybe leave a week and try again? i dont know much about weaning but its just a thiught.

girls Keep pics coming! I will have to go dig out a couple of recent ones!
 
She's a stunner! welcome to the world Lexi!
 
Well done baby Alfie :) Bumpy it must be such a relief seeing him hit his milestones nice and early :)
 
Jumperoo fun :)

https://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee484/embo-78/63EE632A-1509-46CF-A927-D175570039CD-30408-000013CCA38434D9.jpg

https://i1230.photobucket.com/albums/ee484/embo-78/E3282FF2-E10F-4F7C-94B9-E206E313BE9F-30408-000013CCA01F040E.jpg
 
Hi everyone...

Croy, its lovely to see a picture of Levi, he is adoreable.

Embo, Max is so cute in his jumperoo! These Jumparoos sure do seem to be popular, I know my sister felt that it was the best buy for my niece.

MrsM, thanks for sharing that picture of Lexi, she is a wee stunner.

Kat, :hugs: to you. Its only natural that you feel your patience wearing thin at times and then feel awful about it. Ive had to leave the room on occasions when I feel Im getting stressed and at the end of my tether. Also a few weeks ago I felt so annoyed that I was doing more than my fair share and just handed Emelia along with her bottle to my husband and said you deal with her and I just went upstairs away from it all.
Do you express your milk so that your husband can help out with night time feeds? I can imagine that it is extremely difficult for you at night time to have to sleep like that but I know exactly what you mean you will do anything for sleep. It sounds like Grey does need the comfort of being latched onto you so it would be ideal if he would accept a pacifier instead but I know you've posted previously that he keeps putting it out.
I know its easy for people like your mum to say that your spoiling Grey by lifting him and its not what you want to hear.
I think its difficult to say whether babies so early on are being spoiled by being lifted and therefore get too used to it and sneaky because Ive read mixed opinions about it.
People have always told me that babies are quick to learn that they like getting lifted and therefore will cry for it but online I've read people say that babies dont know how to be like that until about 6 months.
I think a huge part of it is just like as to what type of baby you have some are just more fussy than others.

Last night must have been the night for fussy babies and I wanted to excercise on my cross trainer and then have time to myself to watch some programmes and paint my nails, just things that let me get a break from it all. So my husband insisted that he'd watch Emelia but she just cried for the whole 3 hours and I could hear my husband getting stressed out with her downstairs. It was really hard but I just left him to it as I wanted him to experience that. I then gave in and all she needed was swaddled and her dummy/pacifier put in and rocked her to sleep in my arms.
My husband disagrees with me and says that we are spoiling her by rocking her and nursing her to sleep but as far as Im concerned you've got to do what you can to stop the crying at times as its so far to listen to it for long.
I am very lucky in that Emelia generally will self settle herself to sleep whether in her moses basket or on the couch. But recently she has been troubled with trapped wind after feeds.

Why is it aswell when you've got an early appointment for something that any night time routine does not go to plan!
Emelia for two weeks now has been taking a midnight feed and then not waking until 5 or 6am. But last night she woke at 2am and then 5am for feeds and then we had to get up early for her injections.

I felt so terrible for her getting the two injections, she was screaming and it was the first time ever that I have seen real tears, they were streaming down her cheeks. She has been very unsettled ever since and crying more than normal. It took me 3 times to reheat my lunch before I even got to eat it and now she's propped up on the couch sleeping like butter wouldnt melt!
 
Awww embo love the jumperoo pics he's so handsome!

Just jabs are the worst I hate seeing them in floods of tears! You should be able to give her a dose of calpol if she's suffering even though she's under 3 months - there should be jab advice on the box, I've found it's always helped Alfie x
 
It's horrendous when they have their jabs. Just, Mark is the same with picking up when they cry and thinking we are spoiling him. Men seem to be able to switch off from it and we can't.
Louis has slept all day. He had a good nights sleep as well, which was great but I can't keep him awake today. We have been out and about and in the car and stuff but I'm a little concerned why he should be sleeping so much.
 
Embo- I was also a Spice Girl’s fanatic! I’m sure I drove my parents nuts and even insisted on having platform sneakers:dohh:. I love the jumperoo picture and Max with all his chubbiness!

Croy- Barbados sounds wonderful! There is definitely a difference between flying with a 3 month old vs a 10 month old especially if they are mobile. Just make sure to take lots of things to keep him occupied and hopefully he will be able to get a good nap in. Love the pictures! He is a handsome little guy.

Kat- Typically surrogacy contracts state that 2 embryos are transferred but that is up to me and the intended parents. I would love to just do one but feel our chances would not be as great and I would feel awful about a failed cycle. I’m still thinking about this part. The most I would carry would be twins (my agency will not allow me to carry more because I have such a small frame) if I have to but I would really love to just carry a singleton.

Like the others have said, please don’t be too hard on yourself about losing your temper. This mommy business isn’t always a walk in the park. I’ve done the same thing and felt awful about it but we are only human and the lack of sleep is a killer. It helps to just put the baby down in a safe place and walk away for a few minutes to gain composure or if DH is available had the baby over to him and get some “me” time. Once Tim came home from work and found both of us sitting on the nursery floor bawling. I just couldn’t get her to stop crying and when I am overwhelmed I just burst into tears. Tomorrow is a new day :hugs:

Davies- Penny used to love sticking her tongue out as well. My dad named her baby May-u-shka which means 'lizard' in Laguna. Her real Native American name is ‘Harvest Song’ (Shoo-dee) but every one calls her May-u-shka:haha:. I had a similar issue with Penny and she would spit out almost everything I gave her at first. I continued letting her taste and then eventually she got the hang of it. They just need practice or you can try holding off for another week or two:thumbup:.

Fili- Your little girl is simply gorgeous! I hope you are recovering well and enjoying your new family of 3.

Bumpy- sorry the 12 hours didn’t happen last night. It happens on and off. Yay for rolling front to back!!!

Just- Sorry you also had a restless night and then had to take Emelia for her shots. Good for you getting some me time in.

MrsMigg- growth spurt? That is my answer to everything or teething:dohh: Or maybe the car ride keeps putting him to sleep

AFM- The agency got back to me and are making sure they don’t have anyone else they want us to look at before making our final decision to meet the intended parents. We should know by the end of the week and then the parents will fly out to meet us! Next weekend I am taking Tim to his first surro meeting so I can introduce him to our councilor and all the other surrogates in our area (I think there are 5 and then a couple from surrounding states). I’m excited for this and think it will be good for Tim to ask some questions and talk to the other husbands plus they always serve us a delicious lunch and it is just fun to hear where everyone is at in the process.

Here are a few pictures:thumbup:
[IMG]https://i1161.photobucket.com/albums/q515/amljunggren/pennys%201st%20year/pennys%202nd%20year/c47a5446007d8dc90359eb2771e7d0fb.jpg[/IMG]
[IMG]https://i1161.photobucket.com/albums/q515/amljunggren/pennys%201st%20year/pennys%202nd%20year/615a8c81b11f5db89405bdafd69f0dac.jpg[/IMG]
 
Oh my goodness Fili she is gorgeous!! Congratulations. Thanks for posting MrsM :)

Embo - What a cutie i his jumperoo, aren't they so funny when they really get bouncing, I can't believe Levi had such a rough sleep day yesterday after all that jumping, he must have been so tired.

Jodi - did you mention you had a twin nursing pillow? What brand was it and did you like it? My really good friend is having twins in April (when they are born, her other kids will be 1.5 and 2.5 years old...she is going to have her hands full!) Anyway, I told he I would ask if you had any twin specific equipment that you would recommend and when I mentioned I thought you had a twin pillow she had never heard of it so I wanted to make sure I wasn't remembering things that weren't there.

Jabs are the worst. I know that Levi seems to have his reaction the day after the shots. The first time I thought I was in the clear because he was acting totally normal but the next day was bad news bears!!
I am feeling like my milk is finally coming in like it was pre-period. I was starting to get nervous but I guess it really was just my period affecting it. Hoping to pump more today.

My in laws are coming over to give me a driving lesson/watch the baby and let me study. I am hoping it works out and that they are good at getting Levi to sleep. He can be a stinker and they like him to be awake when they are here but I hope they will listen to instructions and get him down...and that he doesn't act up - little stinker :)
 
hoping - we posted at the same time! i love the pictures. You and penny are both beautiful!! I hope all goes well with the surrogacy lunch. What a great idea to be able t share stories with other couples, its such a unique thing to do i am sure it will put DH's mind at rest to talk to other hubbys who have been through it
 
Hi ladies

Loving all the pictures - these rainbow babies are so gorgeous :cloud9:

I continue to read every day, I like to hear about all your babies - makes me realise that almost everything is 'normal' when it comes to newborns!!

I just don't seem to have much time to post, and Zach really is an easy baby at the moment. Not expecting it to last though. We have no routine, the little man just likes to eat alot! Got him weighed yesterday, at 5 weeks and he weighs 11lb 6oz! He wakes quite a lot through the night, I am EBF so DH can't help with the feeds and I really struggle to stay awake after feeding and often end up falling asleep with Zach on my chest - DH gets annoyed with me, but I just can't help it. He thinks that I'm making things difficult for myself by not putting him down to sleep, but he sleeps so much better on me, so I end up getting more sleep too!

Just DH thinks I'm too quick to pick Zach up too but I can't bare to see him upset and he's so young I really don't believe that he knows what he's doing :shrug:

Fili - Lexi is gorgeous, welcome to mummy hood :D

Here is one of my favourite Zach pics - his expression really makes me laugh
https://i986.photobucket.com/albums/ae350/pinky80/BBC70308-5831-4FBE-8066-B2766EAED374-5209-0000039469561BA9.jpg
 
Bumpy, thanks for the advice on the calpol. I actually picked it up yesterday from the chemist. I was told to ask for baby paracetamol free on minor ailments and it was Calpol that was given. i also managed to get Colief for free this time on prescription as it helps with Emelia's wind. My health visitor told me that it should be free on minor ailments but it actually wasnt and so was costing us £11.99 each time for the smallest bottle!
Anyway she seemed a bit unsettled this afternoon so I tried to give her some Calpol but Im sure she spat it all out. If she's unsettled later I will give her some.
I just peeled the plasters off her legs there and they are bruised already, poor wee darling. She's snoozing away on the couch again, thats her new favourite place propped up against the armrest.

Hoping, what a lovely picture of you and Penny, you are both really pretty. Everything you described about what your having to do to entertain Penny sounds great, I cant wait for all of that.

Pink, its nice to hear how your getting on with Zach. What a little chunk you have, thats a brilliant weight for him. I had to double check his age again on your ticker to compare with Emelia as we weighed her the other day and she is now 11lbs aswell but shes's almost 9 weeks haha. Its great to see them bulking up isnt it, I just love the chunky thighs that Emelia is getting with rolls of fat now, they were skinny chicken legs in hospital when she was born.
Also a lovely picture of Zach, when I first seen it for a second I seen some real similarities to Emelia's little face and hairline, quite funny. Sometimes babies are quite alike but different at the same time.
 
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