Mums/Moms after Recurrent Losses (MARL) - Come join us!

[Justkeeptryin]

Hi ladies, hope everyone is well...

MrsM, it sounds like Louis is doing great and agood weight gain too. As for sleeping too much Im starting to wonder. Emelia is still sleeping most of the day for 3 hours at a time and only waking for feeds and a bit of stimulation when she is alert but then goes back to sleep again. Im still patiently waiting for her to start sleeping through the night! On two ocasions she has went 8 hours through the night but it has just been a fluke. She used to go down at midnight after my husband gives her the last feed and she would wake at 5am and then 8am. But this week she is waking at 3am and then 6am which is very tiring.

I actually ended up in tears yesterday for the first time really which I guess isnt too bad but I was mega stressed out and I guess it was because my period eventually came aswell. Ended up having an argument with my husband.
Its getting really bad the diarrhoea explosions that Emelia has all kidding aside, she has done it for the past 4 days now where it comes out of the nappy and right upto her shoulders! Its like water and definetely more so than her normal poo.
Last night it happened again whilst I was in the middle of making dinner and everything just went wrong at once. Its so bad that I have to give her a bath everytime. My husband keeps saying that when he speaks to other people it dosent seem normal but my sister tells me that my niece was more or less the same. Im going to speak with the doctor tomorrow as she has her 6-8 week assessment even though she will be 9 1/2 weeks.
When my husband came in from work last night I just broke down and said that I could run a mile so I took the dog out for an hour walk which felt so good.
As I've said before I really think we had it easy in the beginning compared to some others but thats sure changing now. Every night time from about 7pm onwards Emelia is becoming very unsettled and crying for several hours and I know that can be symptomatic of colic at that time of night. We're already using infacol and colief in the bottles so not much else to try.

 

[petitpas]

Just, we used to have a witching hour (or two or three) and it generally was from 7pm onwards. It was horrible. The only thing that helped was carrying J lying facing downwards on my arm with his belly on my hand. A warm cushion on his belly (we have a cherry stone cushion you can heat in the microwave but a warmish hot water bottle should do the same) was also successful. Getting him to burp or pass wind through pedalling, belly massage, sitting and leaning forward also sometimes brought him sudden relief. I say sometimes because it really varied from day to day. We also used Infaol. It is difficult to know whether it worked. J just seemed to get less and less troubled. I hope it passes quickly for you

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Thanks v. much for that advice, it really is strange why its the same time every night. My husband has been trying to massage her belly as he read that online, Im going to give that a go though the heat pack that I can put in the microwave and see how that goes, also lying her face down.
Its ashame, as much as its difficult to hear the crying for hours you can tell that she is in pain with it.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Edie suffered with it too, all the things that Pip suggested should work, also I found the Dentinox colic drops worked better for us than infacol so that might be worth a try. I've just bought some myself today as Louis has started showing signs of trapped wind in his tum.

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Thanks MrsM, I've never heard of the Dentinox, will try pick some of that up.

 

[Mrs Miggins]

Well I spoke to soon we had a bad night last night! I got two straight hours and he never really settled after that so I'm shattered today. He has had plenty of feeds and awake time today so I'm hoping for a better night tonight. Otherwise I will start to resemble an extra from Thriller.

 

[Embo78]

I'm struggling at the moment too Max has decided that napping just isn't for him!! Instead he wants to fight sleep and winge and moan all day. Yay!!

 

[cazi77]

Hi guys I am reading but struggle to post!

Freya is a terrible sleeper day and night! She will only sleep for 30 mins at time max in her moses basket in the day so I end up having to take her out in the buggy so she sleeps!! At night she has mixed nights last night she woke every 2 hours but for most of the last week it was every hour!! After x-mas for about a week she slept 8-3 3-6 6-9 and i really thought I was gettng somewhere but she is back to being awful! I.m sooo tired!

 

[croydongirl]

These babies and their sleep. Sorry sleepy mamas, I'm right thetr with you. We are doing cry it out with Levi, he seemed to be responding well, last night we got an 8 hour stretch after only 20 mins of fussing and yesterday he settled himself to sleep for naps really well. Today two of his naps were pre eeded with 45 minutes of screaming. I hated it. Its so much easier to bear when dh is here with me.
Hopeng tonight will be another good one. We are giving it a week, so we have until Friday to see if its making a difference.really hoping and praying he picks it up. He is very smart and knows what is happening when o put him down, I wish he was a little less aware sometimes!

 

[KatM]

Hi Ladies,

It sounds like most of us are getting shitty sleep. The split shift is working for DH and me. At least this way both of us get a block of uninterrupted sleep. This is what we do: DH sleeps from 9-midnight. I feed during this time and see if Grey goes to sleep. He has been napping with me for about an hour or so and then feeding again. At midnight, I wake DH up to change Grey's nappy and feed. If Grey falls asleep (has not happened yet) we both stay in the bed. If not, DH takes him and does some programming in his office while bouncing Grey to sleep. When Grey is hungry again, DH brings him in to feed. We all go to sleep. I feed again, Grey fusses, DH takes him and begins his work day. We both feel human again.

MrsMigg,
How is Edie handling her new brother? I can't believe he did not lose any birth weight. I thought all babies did. It took Grey 2 weeks to gain back. I don't envy you with two right now on two hours of sleep. Super mom.

Just,
I hope the diarrhea gets better very soon hon.

Croy,
Wow, an 8 hour stretch of sleep. How fabulous.

Cazi,
Sounds like you are having a rough time.

I know there were others sleep deprived as well... Hope it gets better ladies.

Heart,
Hope your trip is going well. Here is Grey in the bloom.

 

[bumpyplease]

Hi ladies

Sorry not been around much I have a bad water infection and feeling really run down - off to docs today to try and get some antibiotics.

The good news is that Alfie is doing really well with his sleeping still. He is sleeping from 6.30pm-7am with a dream feed at 10pm. I find these things help - getting him up around 7am every morning as it sets his daily routine for him and not letting him nap in the day for more than 3 hours (he usually has 3x 1 hr naps at 9am, 12pm and 4pm). Not trying to rub anyone's nose in it as I know lots of u are struggling with the sleep thing just thought I would share these tips as they are definitely working for us!! I don't think this would work for a very young baby though. Croy we are loosely doing cry it out and I agree it does work. I say to myself I won't let him cry for more than 10 mins and if he does I give him a dummy but usually he is off within 5!!

We have our own problems though - feeding can still be stressful as sometimes he won't take the bottle but we are getting there!!

Kat grey is absolutely gorgeous! What a yummy little boy!

Mrsm you must have gold top in those boobies - way to go Louis with no weight loss!

Sorry to all you mummas that are mega sleep deprived at the mo - I'm sure it will come back to bite me in the bum once the teething starts!

Xx

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Hi ladies, sorry to hear you've not been so well bumpy.
I think that may sound like wise advice about not letting our babies sleep for so long during the day. Im really starting to think that Emelia is over sleeping as she still sleeps for 3-4 hours at a time and only wakes for feeds then back to sleep again.

Sorry to hear so many of you are also sleep deprived, its not good at all is it. It sounds like the majority are suffering!
My husband had to take a last minute holiday from work today as last night was a nightmare and he really wanted to come and see the doctor today for Emelia's appointment.

We had the 6-8 week assessment for Emelia today even though she is actually 9 1/2 weeks. First we seen the nurse who checked her developmental progress. She passed the first test where she was lying on her back and the nurse pulled her up by her arms and Emelia managed to pull her head up by herself. She then failed the second test though where the nurse held her face down and Emelia struggled to lift her head upwards. The nurse said not to worry as its common to fail that test (I cant remember the name of that test). The nurse said she will come out to the house in about 2 weeks to try it again. I did ask if there was anything that we could do to help but she said no. Im thinking that more tummy time might help though as it would help her to strengthen and lift her head. I dont think we have been persevering enough with tummy time as she dosent like it at all.

We then spoke with the doctor about how unsettled Emelia is at night times from 7pm onwards. My husband was at his wits end last night as that was the worst yet. The doctor has prescribed infant Gaviscon as he thinks it may be silent reflux. Last night she was refusing her bottle and kept being sick. Also going rigid and squirming in pain/discomfort.
We were reading about silent reflux and all of her symtoms matched what we read online.
We have tried everything such as infacol, colief and gripe water so we shall see how the gaviscon goes.
Also I told the doctor about the explosive diarrhoea that Emelia has when she has a dirty nappy. It leaks out and upto her shoulders everytime with total watery poo. The doctor thinks that it may be a bug that has been going around and he has seen lots of babies with it.
I had the sickness and diarrhoea bug two weeks ago which only lasted 24 hours thankfully but I think that Emelia got it after me and apparently it is lasting upto 6 weeks in babies intestines. We have been given a sample bottle to take a poo sample the next time she has a dirty nappy and hand it in.

Kat, Grey is absolutely gorgeous. Im glad to hear that the split shifts so to speak are working for you. We kind of do the same thing where I go to my bed around 10pm whilst my husband will keep Emelia downstairs and see to her last feed. Then I will do the next feed which is about 5am which I dont mind as I know I can lie longer in the morning.

 

[Justkeeptryin]

Hi guys I am reading but struggle to post!

Freya is a terrible sleeper day and night! She will only sleep for 30 mins at time max in her moses basket in the day so I end up having to take her out in the buggy so she sleeps!! At night she has mixed nights last night she woke every 2 hours but for most of the last week it was every hour!! After x-mas for about a week she slept 8-3 3-6 6-9 and i really thought I was gettng somewhere but she is back to being awful! I.m sooo tired!

Cazi, what we have to now do during the day is let Emelia sleep on the couch propped upright with her head resting on the armrest. She dosent seem to like in her moses basket during the day. You could try that.
If all else fails your right that fresh air seems to get them to sleep dosent it.
That sounds tough when Freya is waking every hour, must be shattering for you.

 

[bumpyplease]

Just when me and Alfie had our checkups she didn't do any tests on us!!! I'm sure Slfie would have failed on lifting his head up then too though do don't feel too disheartened! He also hates tummy time and only recently have we started doing it more with him. He can only handle 5mins at a time though before getting whiny! Keep doing it with her though - I've noticed a HUGE improvement in just 2 weeks. He's gone from not lifting his head at all really and just licking the blanket to lifting his head right up and even a few rolls!!
Alfie has silent reflux and he's been on infant gaviscon since he was a few weeks old. It definitely helps and I find since he's been taking it he's rarely sick. I hope it works for you.

Cazi - Alfie goes straight to sleep as soon as I take him for a walk or put him in the car!! Is your Moses basket downstairs during the day or upstairs? I found that when Alfie was little he would sleep anywhere for hours but as he has got older he needs the dark and no distractions if he is to have a good nap in the day. Do u have a monitor? We started putting Alfie in his cot for naps at 9 weeks and he slept so well that he started sleeping overnight in his cot in his room from 10 weeks. I know the guidelines are 6 months for them to stay in your room but we have a video monitor and I check it throughout daytime naps and during the night to make sure he's ok. Again, just ideas this might not work for everyone xx

 

[heart tree]

Hi ladies. I got back from my trip on Wednesday and we've been adjusting to our normal life again. It has been difficult to say the least. While I still was on mommy duty during our travels, there was always someone there to hold Delilah so I could eat, shower, pee, etc. Now there is no one. And she hates being put down for extended periods of time. But what I'm really struggling with is sleep. Sound familiar?

She was sleeping through the night almost every night while we were away. And we managed to extend her naps from 30 minutes to 1 - 2 hours. Now that we're back, she is waking at night constantly and only taking 30 minute naps again. I try letting her cry when she wakes from a nap, but she usually just plays happily for 30 - 40 minutes. She's always so tired though! And that makes for a tough night. You would think over tired babies would sleep better at night but it's the opposite. Lately I feel like I have a newborn again. Last night I was up from 12:30am to 3:30am. Even though she fell back asleep at 1:30, I couldn't! And then she was up at 4:30 to feed. I was in tears.

Part of me thinks she is too close to me in the co-sleeper. When we were traveling, she was in a pack n play which put her closer to the ground. Now that she's back in the co sleeper, I think she must hear and smell me and want to be nursing. We're going to start transitioning her into her crib. I think I'll start this weekend with naps. Luckily she never cries when I put her down for a nap or bed. In fact, she falls asleep faster when I walk out of the room rather than lie there with her. For that, I'm grateful. I hope the switch to the crib makes a positive difference.

Can we talk about naps? When do yours nap? What time and how long? What time do you put them to bed? She is up at 7am. Naps at 9, noon, 2 and 5pm. She goes to bed around 7:30. I never have time to do anything for myself with these short naps! It's driving me mad.

 

[bumpyplease]

Hi heart,

So good to have u back!!! Hope u had a lovely trip!!!

Sorry u are so tired Hun, sleep deprivation is the worst!!

Alfie gets up at 7am too and naps similair to D in the morning but not as much in the afternoon. 9am roughly 45 mins, 12 roughly 1 hour, 4pm roughly 1 hour. He then goes to bed between 6.30 and 7pm.

 

[bumpyplease]

I'm having issues with bath time. Until 4 days ago A loved his baths he used to chill out, smile splash etc. and the last 4 days he has screamed his head off the moment we put him in. Nothing will calm him down, it's like something has traumatised him but we have no idea what. Bathtime is now sooo stressful! We have to wash him as quickly as pods and get him out! Anyone else relate?

 

[hopeful23456]

bumpy - alfie is a good sleeper, wow.

just - the lack of sleep is horrible. glad dh can help out. it does sound like reflux. d & a had fussy time bad from 7-11 pm (or somewhere in there) for a month I think? it was really hard to deal with.

kat - love the pics, such a cutie.

amanda- naps - i think they take 2 at daycare, used to be 3 (could still be 3) but weekends they seem to have a nap about 1.5 to 2 hours after a feed (and eat every 3-4 hours) except now when ava is teething and goes a little longer between feeds.

they do need a short nap after coming home from daycare (for 30-45 mins). But in general, 45min to 1 hour seems to be the norm for the length of naps (some 30 min naps too).

they did sleep better in their cribs without me in the room and i use the dohm white noise machine. works great. i usually have them nap in their cribs

at least she goes to bed at a decent time

i tried putting d and a to bed at an earlier time and they don't sleep so they still go to bed between 9 and 10pm and up around 6am (although d slept until 6:30 this morning, then neither would eat over 2 ounces before leaving for daycare).
so my "me" time is usually after 10pm and however long i want to stay up.

do you think delilah is teething?

my rant lately is now that i'm not pumping, i can't eat like a horse and still lose weight! so back up 6 lbs from pre pregnancy and it sucks. now i'm eating semi-healthy again...blah...and way too tired to work out although i started doing abs around 10:30pm and will make it to the gym again

 

[hopeful23456]

bumpy - no clue on bath time, that is strange! i do baths as quickly as possible to get them over with, they are fine in the bath but it's alot of work with 2.

 

[tuckie27]

Hey ladies :wave:

Ugh, so many babies that don't want to sleep

Croy- how is CIO going? Any better?

MrsM- I can't believe Louis didn't lose any weight! Awesome

Justkeep- sorry to hear Emilia had a bug I think what Pip said about the 'witching hour' is pretty common for babies. We slack on doing tummy time too. Bay doesn't seem to like it either but she gets tummy time on our chests...hope that's good enough. Maybe I'll give her more since they test for it. Hope the infant reflux RX help

Bumpy- sorry you're ill hun, but yay for Alfie sleeping well!

Cazi- it's so hard being a sleep deprived mama. Hope Freya sleeps better for you this week.

Kat- glad you and your OH have found a system that works for you grey looks so cute in his little flower bath & looks a lot like his mama

Heart- sorry D is having sleeping problems since returning from vacay. I bet it was nice having people around to hold her while you showered, ate, etc. Maybe your idea of starting her naps in the crib will transition her to sttn in it too. As far as getting time to do things for yourself, have you tried putting her in a bouncer with toys or a jumperoo? Could she entertain herself for a bit in one of those while you eat or do whatever?

Bay's 6 week growth spurt seems to have passed. This one was much better than the last. It lasted about 4 days like the previous spurt but only the first couple days were the fussing/not sleeping and the last couple days all she wanted to do was sleep! Regarding naps, we found a great way to lengthen her early evening naps. Since she likes the car so much, we've been putting her in her carseat on top of the washer. At first I give her a paci & rock her carseat as the cycle starts and eventually she dozes off & we leave the light off in the laundry room but theres enough light from the kitchen so its not totally dark. I then switch her carseat to the dryer and dry the clothes while she's still sleeping. If we try the dryer first it doesn't work. The washer is loud and shakes her more vigorously and puts her to sleep brilliantly We turn the buzzer off too & she usially sleeps through the washer cycle and all or most of the dryer cycle too. She usually takes a late morning nap on her own & we put her in the vibrating bassinet for that and I turn on the river/nature sounds on it. She always wants a paci for naps. It usually falls out at some point after she's asleep but as long as she has it to begin with, she's good. She's also become entertained with her fisher price activity mat. It's the one with the piano keys at the feet. She entertains herself with the mirror and sounds for about 15-20 mins IF she's in the mood to play. This is great because I can grab something to eat or fold clothes, etc.