Naming the Baby??

[AEM1803]

Hello All,

I was wondering what your thoughts were about naming your little angels?

I was talking with some of my friends (who have never had to deal with this) and they said that I need to get over it and naming the baby was a stupid idea

My OH and I thought that it would be a start.. that it might bring us a little bit of closure

Is naming our little angel a good or bad idea? Opinions?

 

[Ladybugs]

Hi AEM1803

I had a mmc last month at 11weeks and my OH and I have decided to name our tiny baby Charlie. I have found it really hard when other people say "its ok, it was early, wasnt really a baby etc.." but to me it was my baby from the minute I got a +ve test! So by naming our baby Ive felt a little more at peace - I just want my baby recognised as being just that - a baby! We have also done one of those name a star things, something to remember baby Charlie by.

I say if it makes you feel better then do it So sorry for your loss xxx

 

[Hevalouaddict]

I named my twins, after all they may be angels but they are still our children and all children deserve a name x

 

[ceejie]

I think it makes sense. Personally I didn't, as I thought it might make it more difficult for me. But, at the same time it seems more....I dunno...natural to call it by a name then "miscarriage." I think you should do whatever helps you cope with it.

 

[kiki04]

We named our baby. I lost mine at 4 months pg though so no one is "shunning" the idea of it. I dont see why you cant name your baby... it was your child regardless of how far along you were

 

[SarahJane]

I believe giving a name will probably help you to grieve. It certainly helps me to know that my Evelyn is up there. If I am lucky enough to get a BFP again I think I will get names very early as Evelyn got her identity when I named her.

I am so sorry for the loss of your baby xxx

 

[mamabearjen]

We lost our son at 33 weeks, 1 hour after birth...But I dont feel it matters how far along your little was in its growth! at Psalms 139:15 David said that god "saw even the embryo of me" God knows our babies at the minute of conception. My husband didnt want to name our son when we found out at 18 weeks he wouldnt make it but after really thinking about it he changed his mind. Please do whats right for you, i just thought that scripture might be comforting in this situation. Take Care!

 

[Mrs_C_Taylor]

i just recently lost a baby at 7 weeks and we decided to name the baby Alex to that it was a good name for boy or girl it has helped me and my husband x

 

[cowboys angel]

I personally think that choosing a sex and name helps bring closer. I was only 7-8 weeks when I lost my first baby, but I decided to name her Gracie. It made her more real to me, thus easier to mourne, and easier to move on.

 

[justwaiting]

I have lost two so far and they both had hb's so they were a real baby and so was urs. once you know it's there it is real. You should tell them if it wasn't a real baby why does it hurt so much? how insensitive it's true only people who have been thru it know how it feels.

I think naming your angels is a great idea makes them more than just lost baby number 1,2 etc. I didn't give mine proper names but I had named them while they lived inside me for those few months my last one was my little turtle(I call oh turtle) and my first one is Little TAK(Tom and Kellie) just silly little names but thats what I called them when I spoke to them or about them. As I don't know whether they were boys or girls naming them proper names to me is silly but giving them a name is important for healing too I think

 

[BridieChild]

I lost one of my twins at 27 weeks. I named her Bridie Jacqueline. My girls had twin-to-twin transfusion and Charlotte was the smaller. Bridie's heart failed in the end. Charlotte is now nearly 8 and sometimes I like to think I see Bridie's shadow behind her.....

 

[mercedes2010]

Just take a look at my ticker below...I named our little angel after my best friend who kept me sane and was a big comfort to me during the time of my loss!

 

[roothy]

Anything that helps you to grieve is important. We didnt name our angel but I have a pendant which contains a grain of rice in it with 'forever loved' written on it. It is my memorial to my angel and wear it every day. My OH has a keyring with same thing.
It is so important to acknowledge the life that has gone. If you dont acknowledge it how can you truly say goodbye

 

[pinkflamingo]

We had a nickname for our baby from the moment we found out we were expecting, so that is the name that has stuck. We don't know whether it was a boy or a girl so i wouldn't personally want to choose a boy or girl name that may not have been relevant to my baby.

It is a personal thing and whatever helps you to deal with things is the right thing to do.

xx

 

[AFGrandaughtr]

Yes, I think it is absolutley appropriate to name your baby. I named the baby that I lost, and I don't understand why some people don't name thier kids. I mean do they want to refer to them as "that baby that we lost" forever? They deserve a name. If you never knew the gender, come up with a gender-neutral name. Or if you had a strong feeling it was a boy/girl give them that name. There is no problem with giving your angel names at all. It does give you closure.

 

[mummymarsh]

our baby was born at 24+3weeks... we had to register his death and stillbirth so yes it was approprite to name him...

ignore people who have no idea what you are going through...you do what makes you feel better xxxx

 

[BABYCAREY]

I am so sorry for your loss xx
I think it is a way to acknowledge our Little Angels
It should be up to the parents what ever they choose
Yes there are some people"friends" who say the most insensitive of things to us at the worst times!! I often wonder why they bother? I have a friend who didnt even bother getting in touch for weeks after i lost my baby bk in Aug 09!! When i was in hospital losing my last baby she txt me several times saying how painful it would be for me to pass my baby,she wudnt let up!!!My hubby was fuming! I am still in contact with her but have never felt the same towards her!!!
We have suffered 2 losses,my 2nd was just over 6wks ago! With both my last 2 pregnancies they were missed miscarriages.
I decided to name my baby lost in Aug 09 Ruby,we both loved the name and its for either boy/girl,and i named my last little 1 Jack,we both loved that name in the last 2 pregnancies,i didnt have any desire to have either boy/girl,i just really liked those names and its nice for my to say their names instead of "The baby"
I am sorry for your loss
XXBabyC

 

[Fallen Ambers]

Yes! Yes! Yes! Give your little angel a name- when I lost my twin boys at 24 weeks, I delivered them and they lived for about an hour.
I can't tell you just how much it helped me to talk to them and call them by their name while I was going through my grieving process.

When I pray, I say their name~ Landon & Lucas

I'm so sorry for your loss~

Reading this thread made me cry, but also made me realize just how strong women can be.

Hugs~

 

[xxxjessxxx]

I lost my Lil bean at 8w4days. I know some people say I wasn't that far along so it doesn't matter, but like someone said before - as soon as you se that it's your baby. I loved talking to my Lil one, I never felt alone. When OH would go somewhere and I'd be there on my own I just felt the company of my baby. Then a day before before I began bleeding I just suddenly felt lonely, and felt like someting was wrong - and turned out I was right
It was exactly 6 weeks ago today, and I'm still finding it very hard - god knows how some of you women have coped. I thought about giving it a name before, everyone said I was carrying a girl and I thought so too but I still wouldn't give it a girls name. Me and OH did start calling it our Lil Roo though so might name it Roo
Im sorry for all your losses hunnies x

 

[Wildfire81]

Our nickname for him was Bun during the pregnancy.
Afterwards...we named him Jonathan Allen. It is our right to do so, and nobody we know will dare to tell us to get over it.