Need a buddy - 37 & TTC #1

[ERosePW]

I've actually stopped charting. I still do opk and check cm etc but ditched the temping. I just find it too stressful.

If you have trouble sustaining your temp you can put your feet in hot water for 10-15 minuted every day from ovulation. It helps to warm up channels and uterus.

I agree lots of 37 year olds ... Very interesting to try and see why we all left it later than others born in other years. Something we were told by our parents: have a life first before kids ... Get a sustainable career ... Don't give up your life for a man??

AFM I think I witnessed a very unhappy mother left to raise her 2 kids whilst my dad enjoyed a jet setting corporate lifestyle. I always promised myself never to be reliant on a man and it made me super wary.

Good luck to everyone.

Xxx

Jazzbird, yes, I was just raised to get that career going, focus on being independent, and when a man comes along, then great, but in the meantime, fend for yourself, hehe! I was very career-focused after college. I put my life into that, and then once I felt I had established the career thing reall well, I did some traveling, and I always loved hanging with my girlfriends, taking trips together, etc. I dated a lot, but I was very picky. Not about looks or anything like that at all... I just knew that if I couldnt see myself marrying the guy within a couple months, no need to continue. So I was single a LOT, haha! Finally met my husband when I was almost 31, and I had finally found the chemistry that I knew existed and that I had been waiting for. He's four years younger than me, so I think I must've kept forgetting how old I was, lol! I was never in a rush or hurry, never felt like i needed to get married and have kids like all my friends. We got engaged when I was 34, married when I was 35, and then started TTC when I was 36. But I'll tell ya' what.... when I hit 37, and realized I had been trying for 7 months, for some reason that did it for me, and suddenly I understood that whole "clock ticking" thing. ugh! LOL

 

[lamago]

I just didnt find the right guy until now. Always wanted kids and was focused on finding a man, but it just took that long!

 

[ERosePW]

I just didnt find the right guy until now. Always wanted kids and was focused on finding a man, but it just took that long!

Oh lamago! Bless your heart, you were willing and ready, but the right man just hadn't come along until now. Its crazy how life works, huh? Well, it's all supposed to work out exactly as its supposed to. I'm sure you've heard that a thousand times! I know that's what everyone tells me since I've started TTC (or at least the people who even know).

 

[Future Mom]

I just didnt find the right guy until now. Always wanted kids and was focused on finding a man, but it just took that long!

Me too! In fact, I couldn't figure out what everyone saw in their relationships since mine were all just okay...until I met my man! But we were 36 and 44 when we met, so...here I am, just a-hoping and a-praying. And I definitely hear that old clock a-ticking...

 

[booger76]

I guess my husband and I are a little different.....we honestly weren't sure we wanted children for a most of our relationship. We enjoyed our life together as it is was.

Then my father passed away almost a year ago and everything changed when we went home for his funeral. I saw his whole life in a different way that made me realize the joy his children had brought to his and my mothers life.

All of a sudden, I wanted that life too. This sounds terrible, but the thought of growing old without children sounds dreadful to me now.

 

[ERosePW]

I guess my husband and I are a little different.....we honestly weren't sure we wanted children for a most of our relationship. We enjoyed our life together as it is was.

Then my father passed away almost a year ago and everything changed when we went home for his funeral. I saw his whole life in a different way that made me realize the joy his children had brought to his and my mothers life.

All of a sudden, I wanted that life too. This sounds terrible, but the thought of growing old without children sounds dreadful to me now.

That all makes total sense. Things like that can really give you perspective. I'm so sorry to hear about your dad.

 

[Bunnyslug]

Yup Ann Patchett , good read.

I'm horrible with names and on my tiny phone screen I want to reply to individuals but it's hard to scroll back to see names- anyhow.

I wanted to ask you guys some questions.

ERose- I don't remember your whole story, but what made you go on clomid? And you are thinking of seeing a FS soon? I'm in kaiser group so if you are over 35 and haven't conceived in 6 months you automatically get sent to a FS. This sucks for me bc my coverage doesn't cover FS. So if my problem is that I could benefit from Clomid I'm not sure my general will prescribe it. My friend is an ob gyn there and will find out. Which brings me to my next question for everyone

When do you guys try to BD? Say you know you ovulate on day 15. Would you BD 14,15,16? Every other day? Or every other starting on 10 and then 14,15,16? I'm trying to make a plan of attack and stick to it.

And welcome newbies! Our group is really growing!

I met my guy two years ago and was really picky too...but he is so worth the wait! I always wanted kids but really really wanted ones and felt I was ready at 30. Just no one to have em with til now

Ooh here's another question I just thought of. Since most of us are trying for #1 later... Ahem... How many kids do you guys want? Just one? Or more? I would be happy with 1, but my partners kids get along so well. It would be awesome to have two. But working on 1 one step at a time.

Sigh.

 

[oldermom1975]

I guess my husband and I are a little different.....we honestly weren't sure we wanted children for a most of our relationship. We enjoyed our life together as it is was.

Then my father passed away almost a year ago and everything changed when we went home for his funeral. I saw his whole life in a different way that made me realize the joy his children had brought to his and my mothers life.

All of a sudden, I wanted that life too. This sounds terrible, but the thought of growing old without children sounds dreadful to me now.

We are similar in that we didn't think we wanted children for the first years of our relationship. It all changed when we went through a pregnancy "scare" for me (for DH it took an extra year). I just couldn't imagine being older and not having family around me....

Sorry about your dad.

 

[oldermom1975]

When do you guys try to BD? Say you know you ovulate on day 15. Would you BD 14,15,16? Every other day? Or every other starting on 10 and then 14,15,16? I'm trying to make a plan of attack and stick to it.

And welcome newbies! Our group is really growing!

I met my guy two years ago and was really picky too...but he is so worth the wait! I always wanted kids but really really wanted ones and felt I was ready at 30. Just no one to have em with til now

Ooh here's another question I just thought of. Since most of us are trying for #1 later... Ahem... How many kids do you guys want? Just one? Or more? I would be happy with 1, but my partners kids get along so well. It would be awesome to have two. But working on 1 one step at a time.

Sigh.

I tend to ovulate 30-40 hours after I get my first LH surge...so we BD the day of the surge and the two following days.
We want two kids- to give DD a sibling.

 

[oldermom1975]

I've actually stopped charting. I still do opk and check cm etc but ditched the temping. I just find it too stressful.

If you have trouble sustaining your temp you can put your feet in hot water for 10-15 minuted every day from ovulation. It helps to warm up channels and uterus.

I agree lots of 37 year olds ... Very interesting to try and see why we all left it later than others born in other years. Something we were told by our parents: have a life first before kids ... Get a sustainable career ... Don't give up your life for a man??

AFM I think I witnessed a very unhappy mother left to raise her 2 kids whilst my dad enjoyed a jet setting corporate lifestyle. I always promised myself never to be reliant on a man and it made me super wary.

Good luck to everyone.

Xxx

Jazzbird, yes, I was just raised to get that career going, focus on being independent, and when a man comes along, then great, but in the meantime, fend for yourself, hehe! I was very career-focused after college. I put my life into that, and then once I felt I had established the career thing reall well, I did some traveling, and I always loved hanging with my girlfriends, taking trips together, etc. I dated a lot, but I was very picky. Not about looks or anything like that at all... I just knew that if I couldnt see myself marrying the guy within a couple months, no need to continue. So I was single a LOT, haha! Finally met my husband when I was almost 31, and I had finally found the chemistry that I knew existed and that I had been waiting for. He's four years younger than me, so I think I must've kept forgetting how old I was, lol! I was never in a rush or hurry, never felt like i needed to get married and have kids like all my friends. We got engaged when I was 34, married when I was 35, and then started TTC when I was 36. But I'll tell ya' what.... when I hit 37, and realized I had been trying for 7 months, for some reason that did it for me, and suddenly I understood that whole "clock ticking" thing. ugh! LOL

It's quite a quandary, isn't it? If you have a child at a younger age, you may not be quite ready emotionally and may not finish your education; and if you wait you may spend years and lots of money trying to have children.
I still don't regret not having children in my 20's, despite our troubles having them. We were soooooo not ready. We got to finish our degrees and grow in our relationship together.
A lady on another thread said that she would probably offer her daughter the choice of freezing her eggs, so that she doesn't have the same problems she did TTC at a later age. It's a nice idea, and we are thinking we might also offer to do that if we have the financial resources at that time.

 

[ERosePW]

ERose- I don't remember your whole story, but what made you go on clomid? And you are thinking of seeing a FS soon? I'm in kaiser group so if you are over 35 and haven't conceived in 6 months you automatically get sent to a FS. This sucks for me bc my coverage doesn't cover FS. So if my problem is that I could benefit from Clomid I'm not sure my general will prescribe it. My friend is an ob gyn there and will find out. Which brings me to my next question for everyone

When do you guys try to BD? Say you know you ovulate on day 15. Would you BD 14,15,16? Every other day? Or every other starting on 10 and then 14,15,16? I'm trying to make a plan of attack and stick to it.

Ooh here's another question I just thought of. Since most of us are trying for #1 later... Ahem... How many kids do you guys want? Just one? Or more? I would be happy with 1, but my partners kids get along so well. It would be awesome to have two. But working on 1 one step at a time.

Hi Bunny! I was ttc for 9 mths when I went to see my OB (wish I'd gone at 6 mths). I was using OPKs and charting, so he didn't do tests to see if I was O'ing. He saw from my charts that I was O'ing early though...around cd10. Plenty of girls get prego O'ing early, but since I wasn't getting prego, he thought I might benefit by pushing it out a few days to give the eggs more time to mature. So clomid was it (after he made my DH go do a SA) I O'd on cd14 last cycle, and cd13 this cycle. I'm just hoping to get a bfp from it! I think a lot of OBs are willing to give it a try for a few months, especially if you tell yours that your ins won't cover an FS. Def worth a try!

As for seeing an FS... I'll probably call my OB if this cycle is unsuccessful, and see what additional tests they run, to rule out hormone issues or something. I'll probably give the clomid 3 cycles before seeing an FS, but no longer, as that will be just over a year ttc.

My DH and I BD almost everyday from cd9 to cd 18. That's just in case I O early like I was before, and also a few extra days after O, just for safe measure. We do skip a couple of those days, since I've heard every other day is better, so we skip one here and there. We often alternate morning/night too, just to put a little extra time between baby-making sessions.

I'd like 2 kids, but at this point, I'd settle for one, I want to be a mom so bad. My plan is to have the 1st, and start trying immediately for the 2nd. I know so many women who had trouble conceiving their 1st, but then got prego with their 2nd, only months after giving birth. Im gonna attempt that, but we'll see!

 

[oldermom1975]

I see a lot of you have your fertility friend charts posted in your signature. Can someone please tell me how to do that? I have been searching the boards, but haven't used the right search phrase or something.

 

[terripeachy]

I'm just going to barge in-hi everyone!
Oldermom-First go to FF (I think you have to use a computer, not a phone app), and click on sharing. There are a couple links there for you to copy. Then, go back to this site and on the left you'll see user CP (control panel), and there is something that says signature. Paste the FF link into the signature area and click preview and check it out.

Hope that helps!

Ps. I would like to have one kid and adopt one kid. If I end up with twins naturally, I would still like to adopt, so that would make three!

 

[L.Ann.V]

I'm on Day 6 of blinking smiley face (high fertility), but with the first 3 days, the blinking smiley face went away immediately after I ejected the pee stick. With the last 3 days, the blinking smiley face remained after I ejected the pee stick, which sounds more accurate. According to the directions, high fertility days (blinking smiley face) should remain for 8 minutes. I know everybody is different, but I have that worry in the back of my head that I'm somehow doing the ovulation test wrong. Also, I was on antibiotics for a sinus infection at the start of my cycle and I know some meds can affect results. Do you think the first 3 days were a false positive? Has this happened to anyone else? Thanks ladies.

 

[ERosePW]

I'm on Day 6 of blinking smiley face (high fertility), but with the first 3 days, the blinking smiley face went away immediately after I ejected the pee stick. With the last 3 days, the blinking smiley face remained after I ejected the pee stick, which sounds more accurate. According to the directions, high fertility days (blinking smiley face) should remain for 8 minutes. I know everybody is different, but I have that worry in the back of my head that I'm somehow doing the ovulation test wrong. Also, I was on antibiotics for a sinus infection at the start of my cycle and I know some meds can affect results. Do you think the first 3 days were a false positive? Has this happened to anyone else? Thanks ladies.

This cycle, I got the dang flashing smiley for a week straight. Can't recall if it went away right after ejecting the stick or not. I also get flashing smileys at random times during my cycle when I just test for the heck of it out of curiosity. When I should be getting a blank circle, I get a flashing smiley. I used to love that thing because it gave me four days advance notice of O. But when it started giving me tons of flashing smileys even at random times throughout my cycle, I moved back to the regular CB digital that only gives the two days of solid smiley, as those flashing smileys were starting to make me crazy, lol. I do love my CB digital though.

 

[Ahnshi]

Hello Lovelies, first so sorry to those who are getting those BFNs.

ERose, I say, it's not over til the witch shows up! Keep your head up.

Tryfor2, SO excited that you are the first BFP of this thread! It brings so much hope. I hope there will be many more BFPs to come.

Here's to a Christmas time BFP for all those that will be trying next cycle. Fx.

As for me, I will be testing soon, will keep you posted on the result.

 

[oldermom1975]

Hello Lovelies, first so sorry to those who are getting those BFNs.

ERose, I say, it's not over til the witch shows up! Keep your head up.

Tryfor2, SO excited that you are the first BFP of this thread! It brings so much hope. I hope there will be many more BFPs to come.

Here's to a Christmas time BFP for all those that will be trying next cycle. Fx.

As for me, I will be testing soon, will keep you posted on the result.

Good luck Ahnshi!!!!

 

[ERosePW]

GL to you, Ahnshi!! Fx!

 

[L.Ann.V]

Most of the month I feel like this experience is all consuming. I talk about it a lot, but it's because I'm so excited to be embarking on this stage of my life - finally! A couple people have gotten irritated with me, saying I'm stressing too much, not to think about it, and it will happen in time. Obviously, they have never been here. Right now I'm feeling positive and pretty happy about the whole thing. Guess I just need to dial back my enthusiasm with certain folks and start talking to you ladies more

 

[oldermom1975]

Most of the month I feel like this experience is all consuming. I talk about it a lot, but it's because I'm so excited to be embarking on this stage of my life - finally! A couple people have gotten irritated with me, saying I'm stressing too much, not to think about it, and it will happen in time. Obviously, they have never been here. Right now I'm feeling positive and pretty happy about the whole thing. Guess I just need to dial back my enthusiasm with certain folks and start talking to you ladies more

That is what we are here for!