Need Advice and encouragement for a Natural Birth

[Guppy051708]

Hi girls! My goal is a natural birth no drugs, not even G&A (they dont offer it here in the States anyways lol). DH and i have taken Bradley classes and so i know that i can get through this (we are the last in our class to deliver, and thus far all 6 couples had a 100% natural child birth) so i know i can do it. I trust my body and i truly believe that God will give me the strength i need. We are also water birth hopefuls (will be delivering in birth center that is within a hospital). Anyways, im 38 weeks and could go any day. The closer it gets the more excited i get, but with that i feel as if everyone makes it out like its not possible to give birth without the drugs and that im being naive since im a first timer and all that jazz. I really do put trust in my body, but after seeing many BnB friends give birth and hearing that they got the epidural at 7-8CMs im starting to doubt myself. What if i get to transition and give up? I just want to do this and achieve this because it IS healthier for my baby and for me. (Obviously, there are circumstances in which an epi can be better for instance, a super long labor, etc.) I guess i just need reassurances and encouragement that i WILL get through it without breaking in for the drugs. Also, i could really use some advice on how to accomplish that.

 

[Blob]

I'm not planning on any drugs or G&A I did it first time around with nothing also... its not as bad as you might think. I'm SOOO exited to go through labour again, i think being positive and not letting the pain take over. I think thats the worst thing that you can do, stay in control of your body and trust that it is doing the right thing.

However i would also say dont feel awful if things do not go your way and you do end up having to have drugs etc...

You will be fantastic!!

 

[JenStar1976]

Just keep up the positive thinking - it's all mind over matter! x

 

[spidey]

It sounds like you have the right attitude!

I had a natural birth and it was really life changing! Even now when I think back to it (almost a year ago) I get such good feelings and want to go in labor again. Drug free birthing is not common here, so when people find out you did it without drugs they will be amazed.

So tips:
- If you remain positive it will really make a huge difference. Smile after each contraction and remind yourself that you're that much closer to seeing your baby!
- Relax your muscles during a contraction. It's natural to tense up, but when you relax completely (even your face, fingers and toes!) it will really help with any intense feelings. It really made a huge difference for me!
- Rest in the beginning! Don't get overly excited at the start of labor and stay up all night timing contractions that are far apart. You need to conserve your energy for the harder parts Also during those last couple of weeks take naps during the day to always keep yourself charged up.

Of course, avoid being induced!

I know you will do well!

 

[Guppy051708]

Thanks girls!

Im feeling confident, just gotta keep those voices outta my head.

Spidey- you are so right! I only know ONE person (outside of my bradley class) that has given birth naturally! Its actually very encouraging to hear of American girls going natural! think i read somewhere that 97% of women in the US have a medicated birth...that only leaves 3% of us that go all natural! I bet it is very empowering as a women to give birth naturally, especially here in the US! No one thinks i can do it but my DH, my mom (shes had 4 natural deliveries!), and my MW. But i guess when it comes down to it, as long as i keep my mind set and my DH keeps encouraging me, i will get through it.

 

[spidey]

Natural birth is quite rare- I do believe that 97% sounds right! Simply going into labor without induction is rare too!

So many people told me and DH that I would not beable to have her without drugs. So after I delivered her, I was on such a high that I wanted to call some of the bigger nay-sayers and say "HA, told you so!" Kira was a surprising 10 pounds too!

It is very empowering! It was such an intense experience but I would do it all again and not change a thing. Those feel good hormones you release during labor will stick with you for months too!

Oh, and another tip is don't read any negative birth stories or watch any of those shows on tv, like a Baby Story. The tv shows are the worst!

 

[lozzy21]

If you do want to watch some birth stories see if you can try and find a tv program from the UK called home birth diaries or babes in the wood. They are more based on natural labours.

I was shocked when watching the amerian birth programes about how many people were induced for no real reason and how many people had an epidural.

 

[Guppy051708]

I was shocked when watching the amerian birth programes about how many people were induced for no real reason and how many people had an epidural.

Yeah, Obstetrics here...well dont get me started! lol. There is a reason why America is #2 in ALL developed countries for fetal/maternal death and why our care is ranked at 40 in all developed countries....even tho "America has best"

Anyways, enough of my rant. I am PETRIFIED of inductions and a lot OBs do it for $ and convience (not all, but many). They say in American hospitals, 66% of the $$$$ they make are from labor & delivery...in America, giving birth is a business

 

[KittenKat]

I know I am not over in the States but going to give you some support from this side of the pond. I have had 3 as close to natural births as possible, as long as you don't count paracetamol lol. I am not carrying my 4th and I am planning a home birth this time around.

To give you a rough run down of my natural births...

Morgan - undiagnosed breach born at 36 weeks - had local anaesthetic for episiotomy but nothing else

Mia - Normal at 38 weeks - Had some paracetamol a few hours before went to hospital for niggling pain and in the hope I could get a little more sleep as it was 5am and I had just gotten up and cleaned the top of my cooker.

Rosa - Back to back labour 40 +6 - Again tried paracetamol to help sleep and that was it.

I am keeping my fingers tightly crossed this time around goes as smoothly and I can do it just on over the counter pain relief. Now not saying it doesnt hurt, they did, but it is very much possible to deal with

 

[glitterbug]

I had a natural birth at home with just a TENS machine and I have to say, there is an awful lot to be said for positive mental attitude and deep breathing through contractions. I loved it!
The more stressed you are, the worse the pain, so keep it calm and relaxed and you should be fine.
At the end of the day, even if you do really need something to help the pain, you are no failure. It really depends on how your labour goes! If you've been going for hours and not getting far, and are tired etc, the chances are you will be grateful of something to help. However, I am pretty certain that it was the ability to be completely in control of what was happening to my body and being able to relax and enjoy it that made my home birth experience as lovely as it was...and it wasn't as bad as people told me it would be.
Sorry people are making you feel negative about it. I'm sure you will be absolutely fine!! xxx

 

[jms895]

I wanted this Caine and gave in at 7cm dilated but I HONESTLY think that if no one told me how far gone I was, then I would have gone longer and coped better. I sort of lost it and thought shit I am gonna give birth it must hurt and I need something

Read the hypnobirthing books and CD hun, it really helped for me and I hope to go more natural this time round xx

 

[vespersonicca]

Thanks for starting this thread Guppy! I've considered starting a similar thread for encouragement myself...

I'm also a fellow American (though living in Finland) and hoping for a natural water birth. Actually our due dates are only a couple days apart. I've seen you in the August babies threads for a long time although I'm not regular enough there to ever feel included.

I've gotten so frustrated with some of the flat-out discouraging comments I've received about not knowing what I'm saying since I've never been through labor. Those few who have responded in a way that makes me feel like they believe in me has been priceless. It's all I have really since there aren't any Bradley classes or hypnobirthing classes I've found... I have no formal "preparation" as you do. I hope perhaps you might be able to offer some general tips as can some others who respond to this thread.

 

[Guppy051708]

I hope perhaps you might be able to offer some general tips as can some others who respond to this thread.

! Thanks for your comment! (and you other ladies have been just wonderful )
Well as for tips (I know i havn't actually given birth yet) but from what i have learned, make sure you are doing abdominal breathing (and not the quick "huff" breathing.) you want as much oxygen as possible to get to the utuerus. Have you support person watch you do this breathing. He/She should see your tummy moving in and out. Also fear takes oxygen away and can actually worsen the pain and lenthen the labor, so try to listen to words of encouragement and learn as much about the birth process as possible (at least that has helped me tons!)

Hmm...try hydrotherapy! (im sure you know that tho since you want a waterbirth ) I may try the shower while on the birth ball. I hear that is wonderful! Im also bringing some items for DH to massage my body with too.

If you are not getting an IV (im trying not to, but will if i get dehydrated) make sure you drink lots of water! Bring a straw so its easier to drink out of! Keep some OJ on hand. This will help replenish vitamins and sugar levels and keep you hydrated (dont drink too much at once tho! ) Snack lightly in the begining. I am bring granola bars, energy bars, peanut butter, Gatoraide, water, Go-gurt, OJ, and soup broth to maintain my energy and water levels.

What else...do NOT go to the hospital very early (personally i am waiting until my contractions are 4 minutes apart). Being at the hospital for longer than need be automatically puts you at risk for more intervention. You are also more likely to get the drugs if you are there longer. Make sure you try and stay active when you can (walking, bouncing, whatever) and then rest when you need to rest! You will need your strength! Try not to lay on your back!

When you get to transition (7-10CMs) many women start to second guess themselves. This is generally when ladies give into the drugs. Just remind yourself (or have someone remind you) that this isnt going to last long maybe 15 minutes to an hour and half. Compared to what you've already been through (im guessing) that really is no time at all. And remember it takes about a half hour for the epidural works. You could be fully dilated by the time the meds work and you just never know! you might be to the end already!

Try NOT to give birth on your back! Squatting shortens the birth canal by 10% so that is the most effective position (though do what feels right for you!)

i will be having dim lights, low calm voices, and light inspiring music playing. My DH is going to be my backbone and I will def. be bringing my Bible for inspiration!!!

GOOD LUCK LADIES!!! Hopefully i can remember this when its my turn!

 

[Sophist]

Good luck!

Two of my nieces recently had babies and both had unnecessary C-sections. It infuriates me the way they were treated and the things they were told.

Are you birthing in a hospital? IF so, wait as long as possible before going in. Once you are there the clock starts ticking. Good luck! It can be done and I know so many people who have said (like previous posters) that it was life changing and empowering. I know for me, I'd rather do labor/delivery than BE pregnant. It wasn't a horrible thing.

 

[KittenKat]

Breathing is deffo a good point. I know a couple of times with Rosa I kept holding my breath during contractions, was great to have OH there to just remind me I had to breathe. Every time I held it all he would do was whisper "breathe" in my ear and most of the time that was enough to remind me that I kinda needed to.

Positions are another key to how labour/birth will go, squatting, kneeling, on all fours open and shorten the passage if I remember correctly.

Must admit that with all three of mine I left going into the hospital until contractions were close together and really painful that walking or a warm compress could not sort out. All three times I have been either fully dilated or as near to as can be without actually being so, having left it so long meant no need for snacks, but having a straw to drink from will be a great help, I know I didn't have one and trying to drink from a cup held by someone else while having a contraction is very difficult.

To give my poor OH hands a break from being squeezed to pancakes I also managed to have in my bag large packing bubbles (like bubble wrap but single bubbles and about 10cm long by 3-5cm wide) I could did my nails into those things and not pop them, have heard people recommend tennis balls too

Thats probably all the advice I can offer, I have a mind like a broken sieve at the mo, but if you need anymore just shout.

To encouragement, just think to yourself, "I am built to do this so I can do this" Think being positive about it even though it may hurt like nothing ever experienced before will help, because it is true. Also the pain is truly fleeting once you hold your baby

 

[vespersonicca]

Thanks a bunch for all the responses to this thread. They have been so encouraging and helpful. I really should have tried to build an encouraging network on BnB a long time ago before I let all those discouraging comments get me angry. They never deterred me but occasionally made me feel more determined for the wrong reasons. It certainly will be very gratifying to say I did it to a select few of them though!

 

[bathbabe]

trust your body. You can do it. Its what womens bodies are for. Im not gunna lie, it does hurt. I had gas and air. It didnt get rid of the pain, just made it slightly more bareable. Next time im gunna try without gas and air. I didnt use it while pushing. It didnt help at all. And trust me, if i can do it, you certainly can! I had the intentions of using all the drugs available! TRUST IN YOUR BODY! But even if you do decide you need pain relief, you havnt failed yourself or your baby. Good luck hun xxx

 

[MsEmski]

I had a couple of paractemol, but apart from those an entirely naturalbirth. It was hard work, but so, so, so worth it! It was the single-most amazing experiences of my life. Being able to still remember each contraction, every push & the joy I felt when I met him is over-whelming. I don't think my LO would be half as alert, or doing as well had he been drugged up from his first breath.

Enjoy!

 

[KandyKinz]

I think you truly have a wonderful attitude going into it....

I also think it's important to prepare yourself for transition! Not trying to scare you but transition is a time when most if not almost all women reach the point where they just feel as though they've hit a wall and believe they can't do it anymore.... It's at the moment you have to remind yourself that transition is a very short stage of labour and that at any moment you'll be fully dilated and pushing out your baby and coming to the end of the pain.

 

[JenStar1976]

I did pregnancy Yoga and definitely think that all the relaxation and breathing techniques I learnt helped enormously with my natural home water birth. The whole time through my labour, I was remembering what my Yoga teacher taught us: "if your jaw is relaxed, then your pelvis is relaxed". At the end of each contraction, I consciously relaxed my jaw (you'll be surprised how much you clench it without realising - you're probably doing it right now!). I had a fabulous labour and birth and put it all down to education, preparation and self-belief (mind over matter).

I think a lot of women are "scared" of childbirth: it's the fear that allows most women to put all their faith in the doctors (rather than themselves) thereby allowing them to take over unnecessarily.

Just carry on as you are with your positive thinking. Not long to go now! x