need advice

[twinkletoes]

Hi everyone, hope you and your little ones are ok.
Anyway, i need some advice on something. Yesterday i took my 8 month old dd to her 8 month check up thingy. And when i undressed her for her to be weighed the HV noticed 2 bruises on the top of her legs. I have no idea where they are from and they werent there when i bathed her the previous night, or when i dressed her that morning. I told the HV this when she asked me where they were from. Then the HV said as they are not in a common place for bruises she would have to refer it to social services. I WOULD NEVER hurt any of my children, i honestly dont know how she got them and now im scared shes going to be taken away from me i really dont know what to do

 

[Jo]

You what!!!!?????
they are contacting SS for that??? that is disgusting!!!
Babies get bruises in all sorts of places for all sorts of reasons and the HV should bloody well know that
She could have caught them on her cot or anything!!

I really don't think they will tke her away hunny, will just be more a check to see that you are ok and can cope i would think and that everything is as it should be

I feel sick to my stomach for you these HV's seem to be stuck up there own arses all the time and surley common sense should come into play

FFS if you were harming/negleting her you sure as hell wouldn't have taken her for her check
What to they do to people who don'yt go to clinics and stuff?
Erm let me think about it, oh yeah they don't bother with them!!!!!

My god i am so damn annoyed for you

I would call SS or go to docs myself and see what they say from your point of veiw
Yeah def get booked into docs as you may be able to make complaint

 

[Tam]

I totally agree with Jo, it is disgusting!

 

[Kim]

That is disgusting hunni.

Nappies bit to tight can cause bruising.

Tickling them can too.

The cots if there legs get stuck too.

Please try and stay calm hun.Iknow it is hard iam oign through things with SS myself at the moment xxx

Hugs toyou xxxxx

 

[twinkletoes]

well i was just bathing my daughter and i have realised how shes done it. lets just say i'll be writing to safety 1st about their bath seats

 

[Dionne]

i DONT think its digusting atall.
i would not be offended if SS checked my children. ild be happy as they are doing there job
its good the HV didnt just trust you on face value and she has followed it through
they have been round mine twice before. once because Tyler my lil brother when he was 3 jumped in the bath when it was a few inches deep of boiling hot water and he burnt himself badly.
and the other time Diors childminder contacted them as Diors top of her legs were bruised. it was from when she was in one of them plastic bath seats that help them sit up.
they are doing there job. and im glad that they take these things seriously. of course you are not harming your child. bit some mothers do.

 

[Iwantone!!!]

dont worry they do things like tqaht u have nothing to worry about

 

[Lauz_1601]

I agree with Dionne, they are doing there job, and if they didnt then the parents who actually do abuse there children would never be caught. BUT I can imagine you must feel pretty bad, I know I would even though Id know id done nothing wrong. Dont worry about it though hun, nothing will come of it. I would definaly write to safety first! especially as the same thing happened with Dior. I dont use a bath seat just let Ella roam around the bath.

 

[KX]

Everytime I lift rebecca out her bath seat she kicks her legs and bangs them off it, resulting in bruises . Babies do get them all the time.

 

[twinkletoes]

i cant let lily-mae roam around the bath, she always slips and almost drowns herself im going to wrap flannels around the seat to try and prevent more bruises. i need to take her to the doctors today too, but i darent just incase they thought id done summat to her

 

[KX]

Mines is a blue safety 1st bath seat

 

[twinkletoes]

ive got a white 1, its got green suckers on the bottom

 

[Tam]

i DONT think its digusting atall.
i would not be offended if SS checked my children. ild be happy as they are doing there job
its good the HV didnt just trust you on face value and she has followed it through
they have been round mine twice before. once because Tyler my lil brother when he was 3 jumped in the bath when it was a few inches deep of boiling hot water and he burnt himself badly.
and the other time Diors childminder contacted them as Diors top of her legs were bruised. it was from when she was in one of them plastic bath seats that help them sit up.
they are doing there job. and im glad that they take these things seriously. of course you are not harming your child. bit some mothers do.

I was just saying to Paul that I think it is right that things get followed up, but what I find disgusting, is that instead of explaining things to you and putting your mind at rest, you are told they are in a strange place, therefore we have to get SS involved........that makes you feel crap as a parent and it is not necessarily the case. Just because bruises are in a different place does not mean cause for alarm!!! Anything can happen to the best of parents resulting in a bruise, but I do think they have to take the kiddies behaviour into account too, and if there is cause for concern, then fine, pick up the phone and make that call, but otherwise, there just seems to be a lot of over reaction in a few cases, again, I am not against it, but there are ways and means of doing it without pointing the finger or being made to feel that the finger has been pointed at you!!

I took Jade to the Doc's when she was just 16 months old because of something she was doing.......he went and consulted with another Doctor, then came back and said how baffled he was, as what I had said was a sure sign of a child beng abused, it was their way of dealing with it BUT he could see how happy and content she was playing in his office and how she reacted with me and my Mum which told him she was no way being abused, but he said he would get the HV to come around just to see if she could shed some light on things........

I took no offence to this, as I wanted to get to the bottom of it and not for one minute did he make me feel I was possibly the cause of it......it turns out, she was just missing my Mum, as she used to live with us and had moved out and it was her way of showing her hurt!

 

[twinkletoes]

thanks for the advice girls. i will try not to worry now, after all ive done nothing wrong

 

[Dionne]

if a child has been getting abused for years the first thing people say is "why was this not noticed sooner"
i think the hv should over react as soon as they see any kind of harm marks or any thing on a child. better to be safe then sorry
i think maybe because twinkletoes had no idea how the marks got there and them being in a odd place would have raised concern too.
you can never be to carefull nower days.

 

[Kina]

if a child has been getting abused for years the first thing people say is "why was this not noticed sooner"
i think the hv should over react as soon as they see any kind of harm marks or any thing on a child. better to be safe then sorry
i think maybe because twinkletoes had no idea how the marks got there and them being in a odd place would have raised concern too.
you can never be to carefull nower days.

I agree - I would be more worried about finding out where the bruises did come from tbh (which it seems like you have). The HV doesn't know who you leave your children with, therefore they might not have been assuming that you did it but that they came to harm whilst the child was not in your care. I would prefer that HVs looked out for suspicious markings, at least your HV is doing their job. Look at all the horrific cases in the past like Victoria Climbie etc.