Need help cutting friends off.

[ollyxv]

I have a group of friends who I've been dying to cut off. I got pregnant and they were not happy for me at ALL. Not even a congrats. One of these friends never even congratulated me on my engagement over a year ago, and I still put her in my wedding party because I thought it was the right thing to do.*I realize now I was trying to keep them because I was scared not to have them. We've been friends for years and they're mean people. I am now not worried about cutting them off, but about the reaction.*My plan was to unfollow them on Instagram as I know this will give them the hint. I know it sounds childish and stupid to do it through something like that, but I cannot do it in person, on the phone or even through text. They will throw a fit and I am not willing to deal with it seeing as my hormones are all over the place.*One problem. There is one friend I still want to keep in that group. I haven't told her that and I'm not going to because I don't want to start drama, also I'm not even sure what she'd say. So I was going to delete them but not her. They're obviously going to find out either way.*I'm stressing over when they do find out that I clearly cut them off. I may get nasty texts or emails. It has happened before and I cant stand it.*Anyway... these girls are terrible and not good friends at all. I need help so if anyone could give me advice I'd appreciate it. Thank you.

 

[Sparkles_Dust]

Hey, first off I want to say a happy congrats to you! And a healthy 9 month journey to you.
Now as for your friend situation, (in my own opinion) they were never your friends in the first place! If they can't be supportive and be happy for you and your good news then they need to be dropped as your trying to do! Now, even though you wanted to do it through instagram its better to just write a long text message explaining to them how you feel, and in the long run how you want to move on with a new life. You send the text to your friends and then block there numbers! That takes care of that.

Hoped I helped in some small way girl.

 

[Ellie001]

I have had to do the same thing and its hard emotionally but worth it. I basically just distanced myself from them without letting them know i no longer value their friendship. I declined all offers to hang out, quit texting them, but i do still keep them on my facebook. I dont share any new news with them or make any effort to worry bout them. If they arent your friends then they wont m
ake a big fuss bout it. Plus if u keep them on ur social media they can see how happy u r without them. I am still friends with one girl from the group and she doesnt know any better. I wouldnt make dramatics over it. You r gonna have enough excuses to ignore them with the new baby and pregnancy anyway. Congrats and good luck!

 

[SRTBaby]

I have had to do the same thing and its hard emotionally but worth it. I basically just distanced myself from them without letting them know i no longer value their friendship. I declined all offers to hang out, quit texting them, but i do still keep them on my facebook. I dont share any new news with them or make any effort to worry bout them. If they arent your friends then they wont m
ake a big fuss bout it. Plus if u keep them on ur social media they can see how happy u r without them. I am still friends with one girl from the group and she doesnt know any better. I wouldnt make dramatics over it. You r gonna have enough excuses to ignore them with the new baby and pregnancy anyway. Congrats and good luck!

I agree with this, if they are on Facebook restrict what they see and just don't engage with them or accept invitations. You have a great reason not to go out with them.

 

[baileybubs]

I agree with Ellie, sometimes friends come and go in life and I don't think you need to outright say "I'm don't want to be friends with you anymore" you just distance yourself from them. I had one friend who wasn't happy for me really, think she saw me being pregnant as an inconvenience to our friendship. So I just decline any offers from her, don't really share news with her anymore, rarely talk to her but she seems fine with it. It was a natural progression really I think and sometimes that happens in friendships. I think if either of us had made a big deal of the ending of the friendship then it would have left us both feeling quite sad, but this way we still remain acquaintances and you never know in future we could become closer again.

 

[mysteriouseye]

I agree with all the other women, I don’t think you need to flat out say ‘I am no longer your friend’ just distance yourself from these people a bit, I had a friend I was close to throughout school, she had only 1 bad trait about her and that was that she was very bitchy, as we got older we had our arguments and stuff but I realized I just didn’t trust her anymore, anytime someone would leave the room she would bitch about them but then when they walk back in she was their best friend! Also whenever I ever done things wrong she would be all like ‘oh you’re a bad person blahdeblah’ but then go and do something worse and think nothing of it. In the end I deleted her number, blocked her on facebook just deleted any means of communication because I just don’t want someone like that in my life and tbh she would only probably look at my profile on facebook to compare and bitch about things when deep down inside she is just a sad pathetic little girl.

 

[calibelle]

It's my understanding that friends come into your life for a season, a reason or a lifetime. We have to be more careful who we call friends.

I had this happen in October, I had a "friend" that was very time consuming, a real taker, I mean it was always about her. She hated my BF because we were always out and I was no longer available to sit and hold her hand while life passed us both by. So, one day I just had enough. I just let her calls go to voice mail. It was liberating! She no longer calls and un friended me on FB. We didn't have a conversation as much as a simple falling away from each other.

So I agree with everyone else, just let them sort of disappear from your life without stress or confrontation.

PS - congrats on your little one

 

[pooch]

I had a similar group of friends through highschool/college and finally cut them off after we graduated and my bf (now husband) and i bought a house together and they called us trash (for moving in before being married...the main 'mean' one then went and moved in with an ex after she got FIRED and her sister's bf moved in with her after he got fired from getting a DWI...but we're the trashy ones). i wrote them an email saying i didn't appreciate all of the back talk and that i didn't want their negativity in my life. the one emailed me back and called me names, etc. to which i replied 'exactly why i don't want to be friends any more. please never email me again'. and while i wish i still had more friends because we did have fun together sometimes i'm glad they're out of my life because they just made me feel bad about myself and who i am and how i think and the things i do. i wouldn't be so subtle.

 

[hopefulfor1st]

Just stop talking to them, that's the easiest way.