November Due Dates (cont)

[Jazavac]

AK_K, hang in there!

It's pretty normal to feel anxious, but you'll know best when it comes to your own levels of stress you can handle. I'd talk to the doula, if she seems to be the closest person to talk to. You might be surprised how much she'd be able to help.

 

[Mrs.326]

AK, sorry you're feeling so down I agree with the ladies, it's definitely worth talking to someone about. And we all care about you here! We're always willing to lend an ear or a shoulder when needed, but like MommaB said, there's nothing like talking to someone face to face. What you're feeling is normal, but you have so much to look forward to in the coming weeks! Just think about your sweet baby

 

[1eighty]

Jaz, your forum will prolly pick up more when this thread gets shut... I'm assuming they shut these after everyone's popped, not sure? FB is good for the chatty, forums are better for the information and Qs 'n' As.

 

[Mrs.326]

AH! I hope they don't shut us down! Maybe they'll just move the thread??

 

[phineas]

No they shouldn't shut it just usually ppl stop talking on it or move to the parenting side.

AK sending hugs! I agree with momma talk to some one. Never feel silly, they r ur emotions, ur aloud feel them. I suffered PND after I had DS and my only regret is I waited for so long to get help. I've finally learned if I'm feeling down I need to talk bout it. Ur doula won't think ur silly so I'd really advice u to talk to her.

Also sit down with ur oh and try talk openly with him. Write him a letter explaining how u feel.

I hope u feel better soon x

 

[Jazavac]

They'll likely instruct us to move to the parenting forum, or baby club, or wherever, to continue our group activity. I mean, I'm not sure how much benefit can November 2013 people get from this thread


And yes, I'm just jealous because I can't really participate in anything on Facebook on week days. Pouty-pout!

 

[A_K_and_K]

Thank you ladies for your support. I don't have ANY friends - close friends - in the area, I've been on stress leave (due to bullying at work) from 23 weeks pregnant until I went on mat leave - so I just stay home, every day, unless I have to go to town (30 mins away) for groceries, animal feed, etc.

I don't remember the last time I got to go do something "fun" or actually laugh and enjoy myself.

My self esteem has plummeted even more than it was (it was pretty low to begin with), I don't feel like I'm getting the reassurance I need from my boyfriend, I battle with my mind every single day because it comes up with ludicrous things to worry about...mostly insecurity related; ie: why would he (SO) want to be with me? What makes me so great? Does anyone actually care?

I feel like I can't really talk to my SO right now about all of this because he's so frustrated himself (from work, quitting smoking, the medication for it) and frankly frustrated that I'm being insecure with him when he's never given me a reason to be insecure. I just want to sit down with him and have him tell me how much he loves me, why he loves me, that he's not going anywhere, and he'd never do anything to hurt me.

We're really suffering financially right now due to his commission based job, and I can't just go out somewhere to do something (ie: $10 gas just to go to town and back one day), I can't go and buy new makeup or new clothes or do anything to make myself feel good right now.

And within a month (if she was 2 weeks late) we are adding a newborn into this mix, and I'm afraid of how the postpartum period is going to hit me. I am planning to do placenta encapsulation because it shows a lot of benefits for post partum depression, but I also know myself and know how catastrophic I can make my own thoughts...just the worrying needlessly that something is wrong.

I know that I have trust and abandonment issues from both childhood (relationship with my mother) and my only 1 other relationship I've ever had where I was cheated on behind my back for several years.....I just feel like pregnancy hormones are bringing out all of this trust and insecurity crap and just making it all feel 200 times worse.

Thanks for letting me talk, guys...

 

[MommaBarry]

A friend of mine did the placenta encapsulation and swears by it!! I looked into it myself but cant afford it at the moment. But did tons of research and I think if you can, you should go for it!! Not to mention if your BF'ing it helps increase your milk supply and makes your hair and sking look fab!

 

[destynibaby]

hiiiiiii my beautiful gorgeous november mommas!
i havent been on here much, but how you guys doing?
who else has given birth other than WTB with those 3 pretty girls?

 

[SarahDiener]

Sorry AK that you're having such a hard time! Is there anyone in another town that you've been close to that you think you could talk to about this stuff?? You should let your doula know too .
I don't really have anyone here in this town/country either! Have you thought about joining some baby clubs or anything? Just to get out and talking to other people!

 

[Jazavac]

Good luck, Project!


AK, I agree with Sarah. Perhaps try to see if there are any parenting groups, etc, in your area. I, too, have pretty much nobody in this town/country either, so that kind of thing ended up very helpful in my case. At least there are some women now I can go to if I have questions, etc. We've not really made any close relationships yet, but this is, at least, something.

 

[SarahDiener]

Not to mention, they probably can understand the feelings you have!!

Good luck project!!

 

[1eighty]

AK - sounds like you would benefit from some Cognitive Behavioural Therapy and perhaps some 1-2-1 psychotherapy. I had a lot of issues myself when I was younger and was able to take advantage of the different types of therapy they offer over here, I can't tell you what a difference it's all made. It took a lot of time, probably about 3-4 years in total (it was spread out over a longer period of time) but I am a totally different person now and pretty much able to survive without meds and without those debilitating thoughts.

Big hugs hun xxx



Project!!! OMG! Keep us posted!


AFM: Worst night's sleep so far Hips dull and achey, back with that stitch thing, heartburn, sore head, sore ears, sore THROAT... too hot too cold, kick the cat, cat wakes up and starts to paw paw paw purr purr purr... very cute but keeps both of us awake... and then I wake up with lockjaw again (I swear, if I find out who did my wisdom teeth all those years ago I will DECK them) and I'm just sooooooooo over it. I never thought I'd be into eviction techniques, but I'm just so tired and so uncomfortable all the time, it's ruining me.

Also... and this may be icky TMI... those lancets I have for measuring blood sugar? Also very good for popping sebaceous cysts. Yeah, I went there. In other news, the mons pubis bleeds a lot if you miss the cyst area. If they fill up again, *then* I'll go to the doctor, cos I don't want them to abscess.

 

[SarahDiener]

hiiiiiii my beautiful gorgeous november mommas!
i havent been on here much, but how you guys doing?
who else has given birth other than WTB with those 3 pretty girls?

Umm, It's hard to tell who counts as this thread and who counts as the others . Coleey did though!

 

[Beankeeper]

Just caught up on this thread. Awesome news that you're in labour Project!
:wave: hi destyni, long time no hear!
AK, I'm so sorry that you're feeling so down and anxious. I don't know if you remember but I've posted a few times earlier this pregnancy about anxiety issues & my fear of PPD. I still worry, particularly about what will happen after DH goes back to work & I'll be on my own- I'm not great with my own company.
I've only been off on mat leave for a week and a half, but I'm trying to stay busy, scheduling appointments, going out for a walk or for coffee, anything really just to leave the house. I know it's hard when you're finances are tight too (I just got a text from my bank- reaching my limit- yikes!), it puts an extra strain on everything.
The girls are right though, it's definitely worth speaking to someone, be it your doula, your doctor, whoever you feel most comfortable with. Also, it's important that you realise what a great job you're doing! You're bringing an amazing little human into the world, and don't we all know that it takes it out of you, physically, mentally & emotionally! Give yourself a break, you're working hard, even when you're not working.
Joining baby groups could be a really positive move as well, just to make contact with other mums & start forming positive relationships. And speak to your SO, tell him exactly what you've told us: that he's never given you reason to doubt him, but emotionally & mentally you NEED some reassurance that he loves you, he wants you & he's staying with you. If he doesn't feel like your doubting him, he should be supportive. And reassure him as to all the great things that he's doing too, like giving up smoking- its really hard! It's great that he's making that effort for his family & will have a positive effect on your finances too.
I really hope you can makes some steps towards feeling more positive. We're always here if you need to chat or rant or anything really.

 

[whatwillbex]

Wow, I take it back you all popped up at once lol just catching up now. How exciting The project this makes me a little nervous at how close I am eeekk.
I'm now panicking for some reason trying to get myself fitted in to have my hair coloured. Hmmmm interesting priority I have there.

A K Anxiety, I suffer from it but have actually found pregnancy has helped it a little. Not sure how but its made me calmer and to try and go with the flow more.
Just keep talking to us or anyone don't bottle up your feelings otherwise they just go around, and around in your head and get bigger than what they started of as.

I so hope she comes before Sunday we are having a family Halloween party for the children. I have her outfit picked out just in case she does arrive.
Its a orange and white stripy baby grow which says mummy's little pumpkin and I have a pale green ribbon to go around her head to tie in a bow. lol Oh bless, she's not going to want to come out now is she

 

[SarahDiener]

Wow congrats!

 

[MrsBertie]

Congratulations Project!!! Can't believe your baby is here (quite jealous lol)

AK I agree with everything that's already been said and the only thing I can add is that even gentle exercise can release endorphins and help to lighten your mood a little - could you maybe just get out of the house each day for a walk round the block/ down the road?
Sarah - I've just realized we are down into single figure countdown today Although I'm still telling myself she is gonna arrive like a week or so after due date, it still feels like a bit of a milestone!

 

[WTBmyBFP]

Congratulations The Project!!

 

[whatwillbex]

Wow that was quick! congrats on your little bundle