November Due Dates (cont)

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Oh_so your right!! I love squash :haha: even more so since my ticker will finally change!

Destiny I so lived what your living!! Spliting the cost of things, and paying more than my share. But I left it behind and started over becuase it made me un-happy. Then I met my OH and he wont let me pay half (well when I was working that is) He believes the man should take care of the woman, really old fashioned but I love it!! BTW I love the car!!!

Jaz thats my problem too. I would rather shop daily for my meals, especially now since some days certain foods just dont sound appealing. But like you said, we waste food, or in my case I didnt get enough to make it through the week. Thats why im crossing my fingers that by planning out meals day by day for two weeks, we can make on that without wasting or not getting enough. Guess we shall see if it works out!
 
bexxc said:
wow, destyni. i'm sorry. that's a pretty lame situation to be in. men can be so immature when it comes to money. thankfully my dh has gotten a lot better about it, but for awhile i was getting very frustrated because i was working two jobs to put him through school so we could pay our mortgage and all the other bills. as soon as he got a job, he wanted to spend "HIS" money on himself and would get frustrated that he couldn't do anything fun with his paycheck. it's like- excuse me? when do i get to do anything fun with my paycheck???
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Immature is an understatement for him. I might be over thinking things, But i swear his car is gonna be our downfall. He doesnt have the money for it. but in a couple paychecks he will. He already asked me to front him the money and he will pay me back. he knows i have a nice little savings and every opportunity he gets, he finds a way to ask me for money. it is sooo annoying!

MommaBarry said:
Destiny I so lived what your living!! Spliting the cost of things, and paying more than my share. But I left it behind and started over becuase it made me un-happy. Then I met my OH and he wont let me pay half (well when I was working that is) He believes the man should take care of the woman, really old fashioned but I love it!! BTW I love the car!!!
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I know what you mean, i am very unhappy. and not just because of his lack of sense when it comes to spending money. we have our own personal issues with trust and some insecurity in the relationship as well. so this is just an added bonus to the crap already wrong. hes old fashioned when it benefits him. He wants to come home to a clean house, and a hot meal on the table. but i pay more than i should on bills. i work 2 jobs and im in school anddd im 7 months pregnant! I love to cook, but i hate washing dishes. all ive asked is for a dishwasher. but he wont get it. so I have to get it. im about 2 seconds from packing and getting sooo far away from here.
 
If I could come help you pack, I would in a minute sister!!

Your situation is similar to that of the relationship I had before this one! I worked and had a child from my previouse marriage and moved into his house to be the one that paid half the bills, all the groceries, and took care of the pets and cleaning. He said it was only fair I buy the groceries since I got child support so that technically means I made more money than him. I was pretty much a single mom with a roomate that was a slob who ended up cheating on me.

Bleck and of all times to be dealing with it is not when your pregnant! My ultimate hope for you is once this baby comes a new spark and understanding comes into your relationship. Sometimes when you give birth you fall in love all over again with your partner and I hope you do. But if not, only you knows whats best for you and your baby and added stress is not going to help from an unattached, selfish, untrusting, person.

:hugs: to you!
 
MommaBarry said:
If I could come help you pack, I would in a minute sister!!

Your situation is similar to that of the relationship I had before this one! I worked and had a child from my previouse marriage and moved into his house to be the one that paid half the bills, all the groceries, and took care of the pets and cleaning. He said it was only fair I buy the groceries since I got child support so that technically means I made more money than him. I was pretty much a single mom with a roomate that was a slob who ended up cheating on me.

Bleck and of all times to be dealing with it is not when your pregnant! My ultimate hope for you is once this baby comes a new spark and understanding comes into your relationship. Sometimes when you give birth you fall in love all over again with your partner and I hope you do. But if not, only you knows whats best for you and your baby and added stress is not going to help from an unattached, selfish, untrusting, person.

:hugs: to you!
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omgosh you totally hit the nail on the head! i feel like that too. with me having 2 jobs i do make more than him. and i do totally feel like we are just roommates and slob would be a nice word for him. 2 of the bathrooms in the house, i refuse to even go in. it looks like old gas station restrooms in there. He is constantly telling me that i need to get on WIC and food stamps to help with groceries. i make too much money for that and so does he but hes always telling me to just lie on the application. i buy all the food with MY money, cook it, and clean it all up and do you know this ungrateful ******* had the nerve to tell his friends at work i dont cook on weekends lol. i sure dont! and dont plan on it. im bout to stop cooking all together! until he gets the sink fixed or at least a dishwasher. i really dont see this baby sparking anything. i feel like...after our son is born then everything will hit the fan. i will no longer be pregnant, he wont worry about my stress, my feelings and my opinions will be more null and void than they already are now. idk, you might be right.. i HOPE youre right. i just dont see it. im in a terrible mood right now, i got a feeling im gonna lash out when he gets home tonight.
 
Oh so I get where ur coming from, my oh has a lot of personal insecurities and took him a long time to actually stop being a man and talk! We actually figured out if we get a shower together he's so relaxed in there that he'll open up bout anything. So that became our refuge! We'd go in to talk out what we were thinking. It might have been a heated discussion but the rule was no one gets out until we hug and kiss! It really worked! Now cause we have learnt to talk its just our lil haven and if he's working long hours when he has a spare hour hell grab me and well natter in the shower!
It took him all them years tho to actually finally open up. We were at rock bottom and built our way up! Even still them insecurities r there (in the shape of my mil) but cause we r on a diff wave length now I balance them out!
It is hard tho like we both got very depressed, him more than me and he eventually seen a councillor, but we got there! As for the fact that ur oh's stepped up a lil is a major good thing! Least he's trying, sometimes all we really need is some one to encourage us and say ye ur annoying the crap outta me but I'm not going no where we're in it together! He'll get it!

Momma yay for being a squash and getting pizza lol u sound very like me, I hate asking for money whereas he'd come in and take it outta my purse returning it later I just can't ha! Although mine too loves the u stay home I'll work situation too! I will eventually start my own career (I've a degree in accounting) but cause the kids r still so young there's plenty of time!

Destynibaby - love the car! I wouldn't give in on his car tho. And if he wants to work it that way I'd get an invoice/receipt book and start billing him for half of everything u buy! Ye r meant to be partners, so that in my opinion unless otherwise stated is the two of ye helping for everything and in it together! Also angry is good.. Angry gets u saying what u need to say and being strong enough to fight for what u want!

Wandering hope u managed to sleep a bit better and the foxes shut up :hugs:

I'm feeling super refreshed! Oh didn't finish working until 12.30 so I waited for him, fed him when he got in and went to bed snuggled in! I could feel in his body how tired he was so baby musta felt bad for daddy cause I didn't toss or turn just cuddled him and slept like a baby! We both woke this morning feeling very refreshed! Even DS is only awake! So good night here anyways!
 
Destyni, have you thought about writing all of your expenses down for him to fully appreciate what you spend? Make out like you're doing it for him to protect his house & improve his credit. It sounds a lot like he's taking you for granted, and if he's fully conscious of how much you are spending, then he appears to be taking advantage.
I earn more than my DH and pay a higher proportion of the bills, but I've made it clear that he will have to pay more once I'm on satutory maternity as I won't be able to afford the bills. I'm going to have to start budgeting & meal planning too. Sucks!
I really hope he gets a clue and appreciates all your doing for him! I personally find it easier to write everything down so that I don't miss anything & end up ranting, which just gets me upset & then I'm not taken seriously. Good luck :hugs:

MommaB, that's so sweet he got you pizza, you've got a good man there!
 
THIS is the car he wants ladies.
https://media.motortopia.com/files/25806/vehicle/4c62bd4bca245/75_Chevelle_Donk_9.jpg

what in the world is that big hunk of junk mess? he basically told me i was not getting my money until another 3-4 weeks for the nursery set. and he has $100 to his name until next thursday lol. he works 45 mins away. How the hell does he expect to get to and from work, and eat with $100 for the next 6 days? cause i aint cooking a damn thing!!! Talking to him just ended in him going down stairs with his lips poked out like a child.
 
Omg I'd kill him I'm sorry vintage or not yuck! I'd go in strike Hun offer non of ur money/savings for the car (and sure he can't access them) and let him buy his own food and cook it! U worry bout u and baby! He should soon get the hint!
 
Now I want pizza :(
destynibaby I don't know how bad things are for you guys, but I'd probably move out, get my own place, fill it with nice stuff and then see if he wants to move into YOUR house on YOUR terms! Otherwise get him to set up and automatic payment into an account that you can use for household purchases.
But tbh it sounds like he needs a reality check, he's still living like a student...
 
Morning! :hi:

30 weeks today :wohoo: Its the final count down la la la la 10 weeks to go!!!:baby:
 
ha ha when you say it like that. Oh no 10 weeks is that all! lol :wohoo: that's me running around in a panic!

I am having a super Saturday next weekend.
I am buying the pram, car seat and cot bed mattress and sheets etc. In one big swoop. So excited! :dohh: then its all done. Few....
 
SarahDiener said:
Now I want pizza :(
destynibaby I don't know how bad things are for you guys, but I'd probably move out, get my own place, fill it with nice stuff and then see if he wants to move into YOUR house on YOUR terms! Otherwise get him to set up and automatic payment into an account that you can use for household purchases.
But tbh it sounds like he needs a reality check, he's still living like a student...
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I agree with this. And make sure to take the appliances you got for the old house. Ugh, men.

28 weeks for me today. Now I'm officially in my 3rd tri. And wide awake since 3:30 am. Very lovely, on a work day.
 
Okay, I have a problem. My husband doesn't really see it as one, as he's used to what I find to be an issue, but I just can't get to terms with the item and I don't want it for our baby.

We ordered a crib mattress because it had a very good list of reviews and the price was just fine. It was delivered two days ago. This it the one. I like the feel of it (my main requirement were coils instead of foam, because we both don't like sleeping on foam, pretty much). Anyway. What I despise is the fact that it has 100% PVC as its cover. It's wrapped in a plastic... bag. Or a sturdy table cloth. I can't imagine putting my newborn on that kind of surface. I understand I put a blanket on it, but I think I would personally die and wake up in a puddle of my own sweat if I tried sleeping on it. I also don't quite understand what happens if/when a baby or child turn to their back and pack their face into the surface. 100% plastic doesn't breathe at all.

The main thing is, I was very surprised when it arrived in the mail because it was something I had never seen before. Crib mattresses back home (and anywhere else I've seen them, outside of the US) are made of the same fabric (usually quilted cotton or a cotton mix) as any other adult mattress. You just buy a waterproof cover for it, if you need one.

So I've been turning the US upside down for two days, in search of a mattress that would still, hopefully, have coils, but that is also made of something that's not a shopping bag. Needless to say, my search has mostly been futile, unless I am, pretty much, willing to shell out for this one here. I have to admit that is pretty damn expensive, especially if I'm not sure my child will even sleep in its crib... ever, really.

Does anyone know if there are other brands that make something natural, or less plastic? I don't need an organic product, I just want a cotton top layer, pretty much. Ikea has one and I'll be looking at it tomorrow, because I'm driving up there anyway, but I'm not sure I'll be happy with it, as it seems to be made mostly of memory foam.
 
I'd go with a foam one, I hate sleeping on foam as well. I think It doesn't matter so much with the babies though because you want a pretty firm mattress anyway. And the mattresses are so thin for babies...
However, I wouldn't do a plastic coated one.
Have you thought about asking your family to buy one in Croatia and post it to you?
They all seem to be foam here in Germany, but so are all adult mattresses... (ouch my back!)
 
Destiny are you sure you not dating my ex?!? lol it sounds just like him and that would be the kind of car he would want too!! But he never wanted kids or marriage. Part of the many reasons we split. I felt I deserved to be a mother again and a wife not just someones live in girlfriend, maid, and cook.

Jaz, I know what you mean about the mattresses. I hate them too!! I dont know of anyplace that sells them not like that. I think the reason is the firmer and less fabric they have on them, the safer they are from SIDS.
 
I have to say I really recommend the medela maternity bra... I have this one https://www.amazon.com/Comfort-Light-Support-Maternity-Nursing/dp/B00005BT11/ref=pd_sbs_a_4 and my boobs are quite happy!
 
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