I didn't dare go any sooner for the same reason Jox, I figured with 7+3 (and I can't be any earlier than that as I wouldn't have got a clear bfp when I did) it's either going to be ok or it's not and there won't be any doubt where as I could just cause myself upset if it was week 6.
All very scary and exciting.
No would be nice to hear from jezika hope she is ok x
I'm hoping to get my early scan the week of the 24th as that when I'm 8 weeks. I had 3 lots of blood taken in December when the sac was empty on the scan, each time I had an increase but not as much as what would be expected obviously xx
MrsLemon - so sorry to hear about your loss. I can absolutely relate Hope you're looking after yourself right now. It's so very tough for sure.
Jox & Elmo - thanks for checking It did end up a CP... or MC... not sure what it is technically, doc said MC but potatoes/potaaaahtoes I guess. I'm pasting a detailed update in a spoiler window below for those who'd prefer not to read about MC. It's a little graphic and lots of talk about emotions. It's been a really rough few days but I feel much better now.
Went to the doc, which sucked 'cause the resident I'd seen on Friday was also there... she'd said "congratulations!" when I had told her I was pregnant, and my whole appt yesterday was supposed to be to find out what to do next, so it truly sucked having to tell her that the reason I was there had changed to MC. Obviously I cried, 'cause the moment anyone shows me a smidgen of empathy, I cry. Sometimes even if nothing is wrong if it's that time of the month. Anyway, they sent me off for an urgent u/s to rule out ectopic (because of my one-sided pains), which was traumatic enough in itself having the u/s wand painfully digging around while I bled heavily and tried to think of sadder things than an MC in order not to cry. Luckily the technician was a stern Eastern European woman, so I didn't have the whole empathy problem (plus my mum is also a stern Eastern European woman, so I like the no-nonsense attitude). Then I went for a blood test to make sure the HCG comes down over the next few days. I'm guessing if the u/s had shown ectopic, the doc there would've spoken to me, so I'm sure it's fine. But really what's surprised me is my reaction to all this. I came home and cried for two hours straight. Like properly sobbed. I feel like maybe 40% of it was negative irrational thoughts like "why me," "I'm a failure," "I am helpless" and "this will keep happening and I won't be able to handle it," as well as just being almost disgusted by and ashamed of my body because it had betrayed me (I just wanted everything inside me to get the hell out of me), and then 60% just the crash of hormones I'm sure. I know all my thoughts were irrational even at the time, but I just couldn't help it. I've not felt that sad in a long, long time and I'm still shocked by my emotional reaction and that it was in response to only one week of BFP. I knew the risks, after all.
I am feeling a lot better today. Mind you, I've felt okay in the mornings and things just seem to go downhill, but today I am hoping it will stick. My best friend also happens to be on vacay this week so I think it made it harder. Yesterday I was convinced I don't want to TTC for a real long time because I'm not emotionally up to that, and in fact anything to do with TTC just made me feel sadder (including this forum, which is unfortunate because it's so full of support). Anyway, it helped to realize that even though I may feel and think a certain way today, it doesn't mean I will feel and think this way tomorrow, next week, next month or whenever. I think we probably will try again straight away (I'm feeling optimistic right in this moment at least) but I'm not putting pressure on myself to decide. Though supportive, of course DH is fine after all this. Men are so lucky to get away without all the physical stuff! I did start temping again... I've been forcing myself to not avoid (avoidance is almost seen as a sin in psychology, which is what I'm studying) and it's been better than I thought. At this point I'm not emotionally tied to my temps so it's nice to ease back in. It's also helped to keep busy.
I hope everything is good with you ladies and I may check back in from time to time to see how you're all doing. I'm so happy you all have your BFPs and genuinely wish you all a really happy and healthy 8-9 months
Jezika: I'm so sorry for what you're going through! Miscarriage is so hard! I felt the same emotions after my miscarriage (not wanting to try again), but went on to conceive my rainbow 6 months later! She's sitting on my lap now! I hope this will be a distant memory soon enough, and that your heart will be overflowing with a healthy pregnancy! In the meantime, give yourself time to grieve. Xx
I'm so sorry for blue and MrsLemon too! Hang in there ladies! I hope you have rainbow babies soon!
I'm in the thick of first tri yuckies! Threw up 2 days ago, and having constant headaches. It's so much harder with 2 LO's running around! Trying to stay strong! Thank God for an understanding and supportive DH! Xx
Hey guys I'm going to sneak in here found out a couple of days ago with a digi that I'm expecting I'm really not sure how far along I am at all but pretty sure I'll probably be due in November. My ticker is just a complete guess. The doctor called as I had blood drawn today and left a message saying that the blood test for pregnancy was positive but nothing else. I'm going to call tomorrow to see if I can get a number. . My appointment with the midwife is on Friday. . Super excited.
MrsLemon - so sorry to hear about your loss. I can absolutely relate Hope you're looking after yourself right now. It's so very tough for sure.
Jox & Elmo - thanks for checking It did end up a CP... or MC... not sure what it is technically, doc said MC but potatoes/potaaaahtoes I guess. I'm pasting a detailed update in a spoiler window below for those who'd prefer not to read about MC. It's a little graphic and lots of talk about emotions. It's been a really rough few days but I feel much better now.
Went to the doc, which sucked 'cause the resident I'd seen on Friday was also there... she'd said "congratulations!" when I had told her I was pregnant, and my whole appt yesterday was supposed to be to find out what to do next, so it truly sucked having to tell her that the reason I was there had changed to MC. Obviously I cried, 'cause the moment anyone shows me a smidgen of empathy, I cry. Sometimes even if nothing is wrong if it's that time of the month. Anyway, they sent me off for an urgent u/s to rule out ectopic (because of my one-sided pains), which was traumatic enough in itself having the u/s wand painfully digging around while I bled heavily and tried to think of sadder things than an MC in order not to cry. Luckily the technician was a stern Eastern European woman, so I didn't have the whole empathy problem (plus my mum is also a stern Eastern European woman, so I like the no-nonsense attitude). Then I went for a blood test to make sure the HCG comes down over the next few days. I'm guessing if the u/s had shown ectopic, the doc there would've spoken to me, so I'm sure it's fine. But really what's surprised me is my reaction to all this. I came home and cried for two hours straight. Like properly sobbed. I feel like maybe 40% of it was negative irrational thoughts like "why me," "I'm a failure," "I am helpless" and "this will keep happening and I won't be able to handle it," as well as just being almost disgusted by and ashamed of my body because it had betrayed me (I just wanted everything inside me to get the hell out of me), and then 60% just the crash of hormones I'm sure. I know all my thoughts were irrational even at the time, but I just couldn't help it. I've not felt that sad in a long, long time and I'm still shocked by my emotional reaction and that it was in response to only one week of BFP. I knew the risks, after all.
I am feeling a lot better today. Mind you, I've felt okay in the mornings and things just seem to go downhill, but today I am hoping it will stick. My best friend also happens to be on vacay this week so I think it made it harder. Yesterday I was convinced I don't want to TTC for a real long time because I'm not emotionally up to that, and in fact anything to do with TTC just made me feel sadder (including this forum, which is unfortunate because it's so full of support). Anyway, it helped to realize that even though I may feel and think a certain way today, it doesn't mean I will feel and think this way tomorrow, next week, next month or whenever. I think we probably will try again straight away (I'm feeling optimistic right in this moment at least) but I'm not putting pressure on myself to decide. Though supportive, of course DH is fine after all this. Men are so lucky to get away without all the physical stuff! I did start temping again... I've been forcing myself to not avoid (avoidance is almost seen as a sin in psychology, which is what I'm studying) and it's been better than I thought. At this point I'm not emotionally tied to my temps so it's nice to ease back in. It's also helped to keep busy.
I hope everything is good with you ladies and I may check back in from time to time to see how you're all doing. I'm so happy you all have your BFPs and genuinely wish you all a really happy and healthy 8-9 months
Oh Jezika, I am sorry and going through all those emotions are horrible. I remember going through the same with my MMC, hang in there babe it'll get easier and that rainbow baby will come soon enough
Also welcome to the November newbies and congratulations ladies
Looks like a fair few of us are being scanned week of the 24th so fx'ed we all have good news. I am simply terrified, the last scan I had I found out I had mc'ed so I'm just praying it doesn't happen again and my 8 week bubs is happy and cosy in its temporary home
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Hope you're looking after yourself right now. It's so very tough for sure.
It did end up a CP... or MC... not sure what it is technically, doc said MC but potatoes/potaaaahtoes I guess. I'm pasting a detailed update in a spoiler window below for those who'd prefer not to read about MC. It's a little graphic and lots of talk about emotions. It's been a really rough few days but I feel much better now.
I felt the same emotions after my miscarriage (not wanting to try again), but went on to conceive my rainbow 6 months later! She's sitting on my lap now! I hope this will be a distant memory soon enough, and that your heart will be overflowing with a healthy pregnancy! In the meantime, give yourself time to grieve. 
found out a couple of days ago with a digi that I'm expecting 
I'm really not sure how far along I am at all but pretty sure I'll probably be due in November. My ticker is just a complete guess. The doctor called as I had blood drawn today and left a message saying that the blood test for pregnancy was positive but nothing else. I'm going to call tomorrow to see if I can get a number. 
