pissed off about baby name!!

[xxLeighxx]

Girls I need some advice! Basically, we are really stuck on a boys name and the only boys name we like is Roman, it was on our original list but my friend who was due 2 days before me liked it and had it as her picked boys name! Well she had a little girl 4 weeks ago after a really tough pregnancy and giving birth at 27 weeks! But shes being funny about us using it, saying she doesnt mind but her OH would prefer us not to use it 'incase' they ever have a boy! Now my OH is really pissed off as shes had her baby and it was a girl and she's adamant shes never having any more children due to a loss and 2 bad pregnancies already! We had this name on a maybe list before she had even heard it but as it was her defo boys name I feel like its 'her' name! Our children atm barely see each other and I dont see her OH, we are just really good friends!
What would you do?

 

[_Lexi_]

If its a name you love, I'd use it. Why should you settle for a second choice, just in case they have a boy in the future? When I was pregnant with Joshua, our definite girls name was Jessica Lily. My sil got pregnant just after me, and started telling everyone her girls name was Lily Jessica!! We both had boys!! Pretty sure that's going to be this lo's name. We love it, we chose it. A name doesn't belong to anyone. x

 

[amybe]

I would definitely use it!! She had a girl, so tough! If she loves it so much she'd call her possible future son it wether you use it or not, She might have 3 girls for all she knows so you can't not use it 'Just incase!',..I know it's only a middle name BUT my best friend had a little boy last month and used our don's middle name for their middle name which I wasn't too keen about but I didn't & wouldn't say anything as I think names are free to everyone, You can't claim them!!...x

 

[iwantabub]

Wss^*^

Can't stop your life incase ...

What if they don't ever have a baby and u pick a name u don't like as much and regret it...

I'd call him whatever makes u happy... She's had her baby ... Would u ask her not to use a specific girl name incase u ever wanted to use it? Probably not... I wouldn't worry.. They'll get over it

 

[Dollybird]

Hey Leigh! Well if I were you then I'd just use the name..chances are she may never even have a boy even if she does have another child.. WhTs the point in basing descisions on what ifs? She will get over it if she's a true friend I'm sure- just explain to her how u feel. Xxx

 

[xxLeighxx]

Thanks for the reply hun! I know what you mean, I just dont want her slagging me off about taking 'her' name! Although why should I have to wait incase she ever has a boy! Ours isnt defo a boy but im pretty sure I saw bits on a scan lol, but we have a shortlist of girls names already! Now shes throwing a tonne of boys names at me so I dont use it! It was already on our original list arghhh xx

 

[J22]

I would definitley stick with the name you've chosen. I mean...they may not have anymore children, or they could have and it be another girl. It seems crazy to me for them to ask you not to use a name "in case they ever want to use it". They may even decide they like a different boys name before that time comes around again, but if it comes to it they can use the same name as you anyway. I wouldn't lose any sleep over it hun xx

 

[Ceejay123]

Wow I'd say tough! I had an issue with Riley's uncle doing this.. I found out I was pregnant before them, but they were due the day before me in the end.

We'd chosen Riley ian Nathan for his names.

All of a sudden they announced their sons name.. Riley Nathan.

I laughed, held my head up and said 'awwh won't it be nice for them to share a name'

They thought I'd change my mind. In the end their son was called nathaniel, my son was called Riley ian Lucas. You can't cater to everyone else, stick with the name you love. They don't own it.

 

[xxLeighxx]

Yeh you are all right I guess I just wanted other peoples opinions on it! Ive said I wouldnt have minded if she used a name we had if we had the opposite sex!

Hey Jenna, the whole Alby name didnt stick long as my DD is Aaliyah and it was too much AL lol xx

 

[J22]

ooppss...such realised I'd written "I wouldn't definitely stick with the name you've chosen". I should have written "I would....". I've amended my post now xx

 

[xxLeighxx]

ooppss...such realised I'd written "I wouldn't definitely stick with the name you've chosen". I should have written "I would....". I've amended my post now xx

Haha I didnt even realise lol! Baby brain xx

 

[kirstybumx3]

im afraid they would just have to be pissed off if it was me... theres more than one child called roman in the world!!! call your baby whatever you like x

 

[MImom2be]

Not trying to be rude/snotty, but this is the EXACT reason no one who actually knows hubby or myself offline knows our name choices. The EXACT reason.

There's nothing wrong with you and your husband liking the name and wanting to use it, eve it would appease her, could you maybe put a creative spelling twist on it? Instead of Roman maybe Roeman or Romen?

Personally, she doesn't have copyrights to the name, and there are so many "what ifs" concerning if she'd even have another, what kind of friend tells you that you can't use a name because "we may want it later."?

 

[Giggs]

I'd definately name the baby Roman, you like it and your friend can't keep dibs on it just in case, thats ridiculous!

Gorgeous name by the way, we really wanted Romi (ro-mee!) if we were having a boy.

 

[alicecooper]

I'd definitely use the name.

On the flip side, if somebody called their child Lydia, Alex or Jason I wouldn't give a fig tbh. Who cares? The kids are going to grow up, go off and do their own things in life, and they're not going to give a care in the world if somebody their parents once knew before they were born named their child the same name.

I'm Natalie, and I have an older cousin called Nathalie. Nobody cares!

 

[sue_88]

Nobody can lay claim to a name, no matter what the circumstances. Even if she had had a boy called Roman you can still use it.

You and your OH choose the name for your baby, if someone doesn't like it.....tough. They can do one!!

 

[YellowGrey]

I'm gonna go against the grain here and say to really think about it before you use it. Sure, anyone has a right to use any name that they want, but relationships might get damaged and feelings might be hurt. How important is this friendship to you? How upset do you think that she will be if you use it? Can you sit down with her and have a good talk about it before you actually use it?

 

[BeautifulD]

I'd stick with the name too!

 

[bluebell2012]

meh I say name it, you had the name first, it's yours.

 

[AP]

I'd stick with the name, but I'd also bear in mind your friend might be feeling a bit emotional and almost robbed (I've had a 27 weeker too) Its a turmoil and you can't think straight!