Please help!

[debgreasby]

No point upsetting yourself unless you know the facts ... hang in there xxx

 

[clownfish]

i know. Its only because its the day before scan day... its always the hardest for us. The rest of the time we can pretend everything is normal... sort of...

My friend is coming by to 'take me out' and get me 'some fresh air'... so that'll help hopefully.

Sorry for being a misery again.


xxx

 

[debgreasby]

Don't apologise ... enjoy going out ... it will do you good

 

[Amos2009]

Thinking of you....

 

[camishantel]

scan day again tomorrow... that'll be scan 5 in total so far...

found a worse senario than losing it through MC or MMC....

'slow fetal growth rate'... (IUGR)


I know we cant talk about the 'A' word on here, but i swear i will never find the strength to do that even if the doctors tell me i have to do to growth/deformity problems.

I have no idea where i would even begin to get that kind of energy from.


I'm begging life that whatever the outcomes are, i can cope with it.. but PLEASE dont ask me to choose to do do that. I tried to sort of bring it up with DH and the thought had clearly already occurred to him (why hadnt it occurred to me before???) but he just said, 'don't' because he couldnt bare to talk of it either..

I cant believe i found a path darker than a MC/ MMC... i didnt think that was possible..


I just have to hope like hell we dont end up there...


Needing some serious karma payback/good luck tomorrow. We need good growth and a strong heart beat, we deserve this.. i know we do. We are good people.

hey hun there is a lday on her kayshablake I think is how she spells her name that just went through IGUR and her baby is doing great so don't lose hope even if that is what happens just know there are ladys on here that have dealt with all these things before and are here for you

 

[clownfish]

Its all over. Surgery tomorrow or Friday..

Thanks for the love guys.


We'll be back after our holiday to Florida for my Mum's wedding in 5 weeks.


Happy pregnancies til then. xxx

 

[Amos2009]

So sorry Clownfish

 

[debgreasby]

I' so sorry hunni, hugest to you and your OH. Take care of yourself, and hope to see you back here when you're ready xxx

 

[Beadette]

I'm so so sorry for your loss babe! Look after yourself - lots of love to you and your hubby x x x x x x x

 

[Neko]

Sorry for your loss. I was hoping you would get good news at your scan.

 

[clownfish]

D&C booked for tomorrow AM... i'm terrified. Not at all sure its the right thing to do, they kept labouring the point of all the risks etc...

but seems to me that medical 'pills' management has just as many risks and a million times more pain.. and over a longer term...

hope i made the right choice.. how can you ever know what the right choice is? ...


One more day of hell, thats what i keep telling myself, just one more day and its all over.

 

[babysimpson]

Clownfish, I've jsut sat and read the entire thread and I'm so sorry that you've been put through that. I'm kinda worried as well as I'm going through exactly what you did with the on and off bleeding. I wont know til next Thursday if things are right or wrong. I agree with you about the NHS. Until you reach 12wks or have had 3 mcs they don't want to know. I've had 3 mcs but they're not counting the first one as I mc'd before getting seen.

C&J - I think I know you from another forum (the photo looks familar). Sorry to here of your loss and if you're the same person, I know how long and hard you tried to get pregnant.

Take care of yourselves

 

[Beadette]

Clownfish, the D&C (or ERPC as they call it now) is not too bad at all. I've had 2 unfortunately since January. The first was traumatic mainly because it was all such a shock and i didn't know what to expect. The second time was fine.

Bascally I had to go to the EPU first thing in the morning and have bloods taken and do 2 swabs for MRSA. I then had the consent form explained and signed it. I then walked down to day case surgery and basically there's a lot of waiting around so I would take a book or magazine with you. I was given a private room both times. When they are ready for you, you will be required to strip off and put a gown on. A nurse will then administer a pessery which is designed to soften your cervix. This is normally aboutan hour before surgery. Surgery does not take long at all. I was wheeled down then given the GA - I came round in the recovery room and had only slight pain in one side and a big pad between my legs. They then wheel you back to the room and give you something to eat and drink and make you have a wee before sending you home. I bled quite heavily on the day the first time but not much at al the second time. The bleding tailed off very quickly for me and was just brown spotting for a couple of weeks after.

If you have any other questions please let me know.

If it helps I was very well looked after both times and the staff were all rally sensitive to our situation.

Lots of love x x x x

 

[clownfish]

Thanks again guys.

I've cancelled the surgery though. I just couldnt shake the feeling it was the wrong thing to do. I was getting more and more anxious and just kept thinking how pissed i'd be if something went wrong and only because i'd taken the easy way out...

The EPU were fine about me cancelling, going in for the first set of pills tomorrow. I know its gonna hurt alot more, but at least i'll be at home in control, not being put under in a hospital and being poked and prodded at. I cant face that.

I'll give the pills two weeks and if it hasnt worked i'll get a D+C done then...


wish me luck, hope the pain isnt as bad as people make out, my last MC wasnt too painful, so maybe this one wont be.......

 

[Beadette]

Whatever is best for you is the right decision hun! hugs xxxxx

 

[Mrmojo1971]

Thanks again guys.

I've cancelled the surgery though. I just couldnt shake the feeling it was the wrong thing to do. I was getting more and more anxious and just kept thinking how pissed i'd be if something went wrong and only because i'd taken the easy way out...

The EPU were fine about me cancelling, going in for the first set of pills tomorrow. I know its gonna hurt alot more, but at least i'll be at home in control, not being put under in a hospital and being poked and prodded at. I cant face that.

I'll give the pills two weeks and if it hasnt worked i'll get a D+C done then...


wish me luck, hope the pain isnt as bad as people make out, my last MC wasnt too painful, so maybe this one wont be.......

Sorry you're going through this.

I think the medical management is different for everyone. I had a mmc (blighted ovum) in May and should have been 10 weeks by the time I had the medical management 3 weeks after my initial scan.

I was given pain killers with the first pessary but never felt any more pain than mild backache and so never had any more pain relief. I hope you have the same experience.

Are you not being admitted to the EPU for the second stage ? (I was given a private room and treated very well by all the staff I came into contact with.)

 

[cindersmcphee]

So sorry to hear your news. Take care

 

[clownfish]

Are you not being admitted to the EPU for the second stage ? (I was given a private room and treated very well by all the staff I came into contact with.)

not that i know of... but then maybe they didnt tell me about it all as i was going down the D+C route at that point.

As far as i know its just 2 sets of pills, 48 hours apart...

I had a normal MC last October and noone took a blind bit of notice. I never even went for a follow up scan... they just let me bleed... i did for maybe 8 or 9 days, lessening each day and that was that..

now this time i know its being kick started mechanically, but whats the difference?

Why is everyone so freaked out that i'll be in CRAZY amounts of pain and going to bleed out...

what am i missing here?

Today they said the pills just kick started the MC.. they didnt say i'd need to be admitted to have it... doesnt it come naturally over a few days?

Oh dear, this is all so horrid...

 

[camishantel]

the pills do kick start it however they also basically start contractions which is why it can be more painful... as far as the bleeding even with natural mc there is a chance of major bleeding..

I am so sorry you are going through this hun..

 

[Mrmojo1971]

Are you not being admitted to the EPU for the second stage ? (I was given a private room and treated very well by all the staff I came into contact with.)

not that i know of... but then maybe they didnt tell me about it all as i was going down the D+C route at that point.

As far as i know its just 2 sets of pills, 48 hours apart...

I had a normal MC last October and noone took a blind bit of notice. I never even went for a follow up scan... they just let me bleed... i did for maybe 8 or 9 days, lessening each day and that was that..

now this time i know its being kick started mechanically, but whats the difference?

Why is everyone so freaked out that i'll be in CRAZY amounts of pain and going to bleed out...

what am i missing here?

Today they said the pills just kick started the MC.. they didnt say i'd need to be admitted to have it... doesnt it come naturally over a few days?

Oh dear, this is all so horrid...

I was given the first lot of pills at the EPU and had to sign a consent form for the treatment and then was admitted for the day a couple of days later. I had a private room and could have someone to stay with me the whole time. I was given pessaries and painkillers and then nothing much happened for a few hours until the bleeding started. It became quite heavy but as I said I was not in great pain.

Maybe you are being given a different version of medical management ? I can only say what happened to me but I've no idea if it differs from hospital to hospital.

If you want to know anything else please give me a shout.