PND Support Thread

[nora]

Anyone been in a mother and bay unit , iam going to one and iam very scared x

support would be good please xxx

thank you , i hate this illness

 

[NotJustMama]

Well I start off with introducing myself..My name is Brittany I am 23 and I have a 18 month old daughter and a son who will be 4 weeks old tomorrow...Well with my daughter I had a very traumatic birth and was diagnosed with PTSD(Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) AND PPD(Post Partum Depression) after having my daughter...It was terrible for me I started taking Zoloft and seeing a counselor and it helped alot but continued my medicine to prevent relapse till I became pregnant with my son...I however suffered with depression through out my entire pregnancy and just couldnt enjoy it...I didnt want ot take medicine that could harm my child...Well for the first 18 days being home everything was great I had lots of energy was coping great with both the kids and keeping the house spotless and all the laundry done and still managing to pump BM for my son and I felt so proud of myself....Well here 27 days after my sons birth and the past 9 days have been HELL!! I really hoped it would not come back this time but it did...I stopped wanting to play with my daughter or hold my son and couldnt stand my OH to even touch me...along with not eating as much as I should and stopped pumping regularly because I just didnt have the energy to and just couldnt get past it...It doesnt help the situation that my OH is pretty much begging for attention and I just cant give it to him because I just dont have enough of me to go around...So I called my Dr 2 days ago and explained what was going on and they sent in a prescription for Prozac...So I am on day 2 of taking my meds and already notice sleeping better at night but only able to play with my daughter for 15 minutes at a time before I feel the need to go hid in my room again...Its also hard for me because now that i am taking this medicine I am not allowed to pump BM for my son anymore and he has to go on formula completely...Which breaks my heart because I feel like I have let him down...Not to mention he had been excessively gassy and crying all night for the past 3 nights and it was driving me NUTS!! But fortunately yesterday I went to Walmart and got some Mylacon Gas Drops and Gripe Water and it worked wonders last night he was only up for 30 minutes every 3.5 hours to eat,burp,be changed and fall back asleep which was heaven for the both of us!! But my OH just doesnt understand how hard PPD for me and that there is only so much I can do and that it doesnt go away in one day...He knows how hard it was for me the last time and was very understanding but this time he just doesnt get it or doesnt care...I talked to my SIL who had severe PPD and she allowed me to vent and reassured me that it was all gonna be ok and that she would talk to my OH and just try to explain to him how it is and that he should be extra patient with me and try to be as helpful as possible so I can overcome this quicker....Just dont know what to do to make him understand taking care of 2 under 2 is hard but its a completely different level of hard when you are battling with PPD....Any advice or words of encouragement are welcome as this is a very trying time for me and I hate feeling like I am letting my kids down!

Hiya, my baby is 15 weeks ond now.

I was diagnosed and treated for PTSD a few years ago so my doctors and MW were on their guard ready for me to get PND. I never imagined I would, but two weeks after the birth it hit me like shit.

I've had a hell of alot of pysical symptoms with the deppression, I finally agreed to take meds for the first time, 8 weeks ago. It took about 5 weeks for them to kick in properly, but I am so glad I started the meds. Straight away I started to sleep better on them.

How long have you been on the meds for ?

I was also diagnosed with PTSD but not til after I was diagnosed with PND. After a long career in EMS they finally discovered I had PTSD. I have been in meds 5 months and have had 7 med changes. They just can't find a suitable combo to treat the PTSD and the PND together. Glad you found meds that work for you. What are you taking?

 

[Raggydoll]

Anyone been in a mother and bay unit , iam going to one and iam very scared x

support would be good please xxx

thank you , i hate this illness

hiya, I went to a MBU between may and June 2010. It was the best thing I did for my PND.

Please don't be scared. I know it's hard not to be. The staff in the units are really supportive. The continuous care gave me a chance to get my medication correct. I also got so much more confidence with my little girl.

If you've got any questions please feel free to ask. X

 

[babyhopes2010]

Been to drs and taking lorazapam and sertraline. first pill was last night and this morning.

i feel worse!! Why>

 

[kanga]

Not sure hun, what did they doc say about when it may take effect. It might take a few days to stabilise x

 

[kit10grl]

does anyone else worry about never being able to forgive yourself for feeling this way in the future. I just look in my LO eyes and know the day will come when i am better but how do i look at him and know that there were times when i wished he wasnt around. I worry i will drag the guilt around much much longer than i will the actual PND.

 

[babyhopes2010]

Been to drs and taking lorazapam and sertraline. first pill was last night and this morning.

i feel worse!! Why>

Quick update: i feel alot better already.altho iv had inlaws over this week so its eased the pressure off looking after LO constantly.


as far as the guilt pp mentioned. i feel better now. i literally didnt want her the first few months. i did feel guilty for a while but i was strugglin and not well then. x

 

[floofymad]

Hi,
Been told I have PND and docs have given me pills, but haven't taken them. DH doesn't want me to, and I don't see how taking a pill will help me cope?....
My DH works away 3/4 days a week and I'm always petrified being on my own. I look at the baby and get anxious and scared. We don't get much sleep and I hardly have time to go for a wee.
I'm not entirely sure why I feel like this, but it started the day she was born. Birth was traumatic and she was whisked off to Special care. Had to transfer hospitals to a horrible place and was bossed about in special care and told what to do and not to do with my own baby. Felt really small. Was in soo much pain and had no painkillers. Had no sleep for 3 days. Tried to breastfeed and eventually gave up after 2 weeks. From the moment I arrived home, have felt sooo low, anxious, scared, worried etc Midwives have come in every day to help, but now they need to stop coming. HV has started and been once, but all they say is I'm doing ok. Noone can take these feelings away.
I look at LO and feel petrified. My DH has been brilliant helping, but he has to work, and sometimes he's soo tired the guilt is too much.
I really feel like I can't cope. I don't know what to do. Thank you for letting me vent

 

[Raggydoll]

Hi Floofymad, What you've written I could of written myself a couple of years ago.

In regards to the medication nobody can force you to take them but the decision should really be down to you.

Unfortunately midwives can only carry on visiting for a limited time post birth. I would speak to your HV. Maybe show her what you've written here.

Whilst medication can help I think your GP and HV need to provide you with more support. As well as medication I was referred to a crisis support team and also the recovery team.

Do you have any family or friends around during the day? Could you arrange to meet up with them.
Also, I know the idea sounds daunting but sometimes going to baby groups can help. I used to dread going to groups but was always glad I did once I got there.
I found groups like baby massage and bounce and rhyme were good as the activity took my mind off things. They also were great for bonding with my LO.

If you decide to start taking the medication it would be best to have some extra support for the first few days. I've noticed from a few posts on here and from my own experience, that the first days taking AD's make you feel worse.

I hated hearing this myself when I had PND, but it really does get better. My daughter is two now. We have a wonderful relationship. I enjoy every moment with her.

I really hope things get better for you soon. X

 

[Lyndon Abel]

Nice post

 

[EmzLouise]

I was fearing developing PND throughout my pregnancy.

Now I'm not sure if I just have the baby blues or it's this.

One minute I'm in tears and feel useless, the next I feel ok.

I think because my relationship with FOB is unclear and all over the place it's affecting me. Shall I contact my GP? I'm scared.

 

[lady_p]

@emz louise - please don't be scared to get help, what you are feeling is normal and nobody will think any less of you for admitting how you are feeling, infact I think you are very brave because I was in a similar situation and found it hard to come clean and told everyone I was fine but I think I just made my situation worse by trying to supress my feelings.

Please know that you are not alone and what you are feeling is common so don't feel guilty, I wish someone had told me this when I was in your situation and perhaps I wouldnt have got so bad through guilty feelings etc.

 

[Katielouisa]

14 weeks on and I'm still really struggling with Post natal depression...the fact I was so depressed when Ivy was first born is making me more depressed as I will NEVER EVER have my little baby as a newborn again :'(

 

[Arisa]

hey ladies, I expected to get PND but its more post partum anxiety, I am unable to eat and am scared to sleep because of nightmares especially about the birth and hospital stay but I am on medication and depressed about not being able to do much at all for baby because of the c-section. I cry sometimes looking at my daughter because she is so perfect in my mind and I have a fantastic husband and supportive parents but still get the waves of anxiety in the afternoon and middle of the night :/ its horrible

 

[Kielee]

Hello ladies, I think I need to join you...

Im really struggling with my 6 week old twins and how I feel.....

Dexter has awful Colic and screams for at least 3 hours between 6pm and midnight and Freya seems to be on and off with screaming, some nights she will and others she won't but her's goes through you and is so high pitched. I have found myself crying because there's nothing I can do to help them.

I don't really eat because I have no appetite and I have lost 2 and a half stone (35lb) since they were born and I only gained 7lb whilst pregnant to start with. I feel like I have lost me.

The lack of sleep really is killing me and I find myself just wanting to lock myself in a room on my own away from the babies just to get some peace away from the crying. I feel like an awful mother for it but I even think I wish they would have come at different times because compared to this one would be a break right now My partner is amazing and does at least 50% of the work with them and in the house so I couldn't want for better.

Im thinking more and more that im not a natural and I wasn't supposed to be a mum after all, my mum said that lack of sleep does strange things to a persons head and when they sleep through I will feel a different person. Im not so sure

Please tell me im not alone in this xx

 

[floofymad]

Kielee - I could have written that post myself as we feel almost identical. Our LO doesn't have colic but has reflux and it's really hard. I cannot cope with the lack of sleep at all and it does make me feel sometimes like I don't want her. Other times I feel sorry for her and like a bad mother. I've also been told I'll feel better once she starts sleeping more but I'm not so sure. I have to hope so. I literally have no idea what I'm doing and constantly tell hubby I wasn't meant to be a mother
Keep talking on here. I find it helps to talk to other people who feel similar. Have you been to the doctor?...

 

[Kielee]

Kielee - I could have written that post myself as we feel almost identical. Our LO doesn't have colic but has reflux and it's really hard. I cannot cope with the lack of sleep at all and it does make me feel sometimes like I don't want her. Other times I feel sorry for her and like a bad mother. I've also been told I'll feel better once she starts sleeping more but I'm not so sure. I have to hope so. I literally have no idea what I'm doing and constantly tell hubby I wasn't meant to be a mother
Keep talking on here. I find it helps to talk to other people who feel similar. Have you been to the doctor?...

Im glad neither of us are alone Hun, im finding things so bloody hard right now but at least we aren't the only ones. I haven't been to the doctor yet because I know ill break down when I talk about it and I don't want to say out loud I have PND x

 

[teen_mommy44]

i was diagnosed with postpartum depression when my son was 5 weeks old. he is now 6 months and im just starting to feel a little bit better. i still have my bad days and i feel like this will never end but it does get better ladies. if anyone is in new jersey (usa) and needs support please PM me and i have some resources for you! hang in there ladies we will all get better soon enough. god doesnt hand us anything we cant handle

 

[Arisa]

why are the baby blues harder to handle and manage than PND? I mean i can manage my depression with meds but these baby blues are HELL even with meds

 

[stephj25]

SO, midwife confirmed I'm showing all signs of postnatal depression and that I should see a doctor. She even gave me a hug!
It's hard enough talking about how I feel but on top of that I have a phobia of doctors. I have no idea how I'm gonna bring myself to set foot in there.
I feel so ashamed