Post-pill irregular cycles support thread!!

[missangie]

oh dodger, I am so sorry to hear about your news I dont know exactly how you are feeling since I have never experienced a loss but I just want you to know I am thinking of you!

 

[Reba]

dodger Struth is certainly one to talk to if you need advice

 

[dodgercpkl]

I'm feeling surprisingly ok. On my way to work last night there was a huge gorgeous vivid rainbow, and I can't help but hope that's a sign of my miracle rainbow baby to come soon.

It's looking like things are winding down although this has been the strangest bleed I've ever experienced. It's pretty much come in waves and it's been driving me crazy! It gets light and then darker again and then nearly gone and then clotting again. I just want it to go and stay away so we can ttc again!

I was talking to my mom about her miscarriage, because I know she got pregnant with me just a couple of weeks after it. She sadly doesn't remember a whole lot, but she does remember that they started bding pretty much before the bleeding was even done. And then went on to say that she and my dad never worried about bleeding they just threw down a towel and went at it. That was a bit tmi for me to know about my parents!!! lol But it does make me feel better that we bd'd a couple of days ago (a lighter time thinking the bleeding was already almost over lol).

 

[struth]

I think whenever you feel up to it is fine. The drs do say to wait until the bleeding has stopped just in case on infection but I don't really understand how it would be different to BD during AF?

One positive thing that came out of my mcs is that my cycle sorted itself out. After my mmc at 9 weeks I ovulated on CD28 (which was good for me) and after my second I ovulated on CD24. I guess they were both a bit later than a normal cycle as it took a while for my hcg to drop back to non-pregnancy levels. Anyway, this cycle I ovulated on CD16 which I was so pleased with. I hope that you find similar (although your first cycle might be a bit delayed until your hcg has returned to normal).

Oh - and I love that you saw a rainbow. It is amazing how nature can be so reassuring at times like this You will get your rainbow baby

 

[dodgercpkl]

I think whenever you feel up to it is fine. The drs do say to wait until the bleeding has stopped just in case on infection but I don't really understand how it would be different to BD during AF?

Yeah I was thinking that too. I mean I know that my cervix was still swollen a bit and tender, so it did bring on heavier bleeding, but I also know that we were going crazy to be with each other and it made both of us feel better to jump each other that day. lol

That's awesome that your cycle has been sorting itself out!

 

[Trishg21]

Aww Trish Are they saying you'll have to have surgery??
I'm sorry it means TTC has to be put on hold. We've had to do that until I've had surgery too. Frustrating isn't it? I have weight loss to focus on for the next 6 months. Do you have a hobby or something to focus on instead? I know that has helped me. Changing from all my focus on TTC to all my focus on losing weight. Rather than being bored and frustrated because I have nothing to focus on.

No, luckily it seems no surgery is needed. They are saying everything should correct itself naturally, it will just take time. I'm really looking forward to going home for the holidays, I think it is just what I need to get my spirits up. I am working on getting healthier while we are waiting. Originally my Dr. wanted me to lose 10 lbs. to see if I would start ovulating on my own, I am now down 8 lbs. but I would ideally like to lose 7-12 lbs more to get down to my high school weight. So we'll see.

I haven't had the chance to catch up yet, but I'm finding myself back here. I'm hoping that the bleeding will stop tomorrow or the next day and we can start trying all over again.

I am so sorry to hear about your sad news. Keeping you and your husband in my thoughts!

 

[MrsReiver]

Oh Dodger, I am so so sorry to hear your sad news.

I had a mc around the same time as Struth and it is the worst thing I've ever gone through, however it does get easier. I really really hope that nature was giving you a sign, and your rainbow baby is on it's way soon.

Also like Struth, my cycle seems to have completely reset itself to pre-bcp conditions since my mc - this is my second cycle - I didn't temp through my first cycle as we were using protection - and FF detected OV a few days ago for the first time since I started temping in January. My chart is in my signature. I'm so proud of it lol

 

[Amelia09]

cd 130 today and still no since of af. Went to the doctors and she refused to give me any medication to help start af, she said I have to wait til the appointment with the gynae dr on the 7th of feb!!! I feel like time is passing by and that it'll never happen. oh well

 

[snowflake9]

Dodger, so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and your DH.

Trishg21 - just been reading your posts, it's some journey you're going through hon. I hope all the pain has stopped and that things sort themselves out naturally soon.

Amelia - although something to start your af can help, not having your af doesn't mean your body will not necessarily randomly ov at any time. I didn't ov until cd100 of my bfp cycle.......don't give up hope completely while you wait for your appointment.

Ladies, I'm looking for some advice. I've got just one sister, who I love and adore so much. She is literally the best big sister in the world. When i went to tell her I was pregnant last week all I had to say was 'I've got some news' and she said known for weeks! But tonight I found out that she got pregnant 2 weeks after me but is going through a mc right now. She goes in for a d&c on Mon. She is so amazing and brave that she didn't want to tell me as she didn't want to take away from my happiness or worry me, but our parents told her they thought she should tell me now, esp since we are all about to spend Christmas together. I feel devastated for her and so awful that I had been waving my happy scan pictures under her nose last weekend just as she was in awful limbo of not knowing what was going to happen to her baby. It must be so hard for her seeing my scan pics and my bump starting to grow and knowing she should be at almost the same stage. I'm not sure I would be holding it together like she is if the situation was reversed. She has had an even harder and longer ttc journey than i did. I know I can't do or say anything to change the situation, but do you ladies have any advice on anything I can say or do to comfort her?

 

[dodgercpkl]

There is actually an update to the saga believe it or not and a surprise twist.

Ok ladies, ready for the news?

I back to being VERY VERY VERY cautiously pregnant. In the words of my OB, I AM pregnant, we just aren't sure at the moment if it is going to be viable or not. She says she's seen it go both ways and doesn't want to give me false hope. We talked first off about the possibilities of it being ectopic and she discounted that both by my experiences over the last week or so and by doing a physical exam. She said there is a slight chance that the next week or so could change that diagnosis, but the physical exam showed my cervix closed, no bumps in the tubes, nothing swollen abnormally - in short everything looked like it should for a viable pregnancy.

She thinks that it's going to be one of two things - viable pregnancy (just early wonky numbers) or blighted ovum (empty sac) and that only time and further hCG tests/scans will tell. We should know more about that when we get the blood test numbers back on Monday from today's blood test.

She estimates that due to both me and her thinking that I ovulated on the later date, that I'm 5 and a 1/2 weeks along which puts my numbers on the low side, but still within "normal". Based on that, if my numbers either stay the same or go up, she'll want to do a scan because at that point we SHOULD be able to see/hear something. So next week, I'll hopefully be having a scan and even more hopefully be hearing a happy healthy heartbeat.

If my numbers go down, then I think it's a case of continuing to monitor, but expecting a miscarriage to happen. She thinks the bleeding that I had probably was "normal" period bleeding, though she's not discounting the possibility of the vanishing twin syndrome. She did say that a D&C or miscarriage pill isn't something to consider at this point as I could have a viable pregnancy.

So it's a waiting game, but there's a plan in place. I was so worried and nervous when we went in today, but I think of all the things I imagined, this was the best possible outcome. I knew we wouldn't have solid answers today, but this makes me feel better about things.

 

[struth]

Ladies, I'm looking for some advice. I've got just one sister, who I love and adore so much. She is literally the best big sister in the world. When i went to tell her I was pregnant last week all I had to say was 'I've got some news' and she said known for weeks! But tonight I found out that she got pregnant 2 weeks after me but is going through a mc right now. She goes in for a d&c on Mon. She is so amazing and brave that she didn't want to tell me as she didn't want to take away from my happiness or worry me, but our parents told her they thought she should tell me now, esp since we are all about to spend Christmas together. I feel devastated for her and so awful that I had been waving my happy scan pictures under her nose last weekend just as she was in awful limbo of not knowing what was going to happen to her baby. It must be so hard for her seeing my scan pics and my bump starting to grow and knowing she should be at almost the same stage. I'm not sure I would be holding it together like she is if the situation was reversed. She has had an even harder and longer ttc journey than i did. I know I can't do or say anything to change the situation, but do you ladies have any advice on anything I can say or do to comfort her?

You sister does sound like an amazing lady - she is obviously so happy for you that she doesn't want her sadness to cloud your experience. First don't worry about what you have already done and said - if you had known you would have acted differently and your sister will know that as she knows you. She sounds like a very giving person who wanted you to have your moment telling her and let you do that. It is not your fault - you didn't know.

Are you close? It sounds like you are? If so, I would just be honest with her and tell her how you are feeling. That you are so sad for her and that you want to be there to support her and that you know that it is going to be difficult for her watching you go through your pregnancy and that you want to do anything you can do to make it easier for her. And then just listen....in my experience that is what is missing when having a mc - someone who really listens. That is not to say that people don't care, just that they don't know what to say and so change the subject as soon as possible. Someone who really listens is invaluable.

Oh honey - I really feel for your sister and you but you will both get through this. Hopefully she will be pregnant again soon and you will have little cousins close in age who will get on like a house on fire.

 

[struth]

There is actually an update to the saga believe it or not and a surprise twist.

Ok ladies, ready for the news?

I back to being VERY VERY VERY cautiously pregnant. In the words of my OB, I AM pregnant, we just aren't sure at the moment if it is going to be viable or not. She says she's seen it go both ways and doesn't want to give me false hope. We talked first off about the possibilities of it being ectopic and she discounted that both by my experiences over the last week or so and by doing a physical exam. She said there is a slight chance that the next week or so could change that diagnosis, but the physical exam showed my cervix closed, no bumps in the tubes, nothing swollen abnormally - in short everything looked like it should for a viable pregnancy.

She thinks that it's going to be one of two things - viable pregnancy (just early wonky numbers) or blighted ovum (empty sac) and that only time and further hCG tests/scans will tell. We should know more about that when we get the blood test numbers back on Monday from today's blood test.

She estimates that due to both me and her thinking that I ovulated on the later date, that I'm 5 and a 1/2 weeks along which puts my numbers on the low side, but still within "normal". Based on that, if my numbers either stay the same or go up, she'll want to do a scan because at that point we SHOULD be able to see/hear something. So next week, I'll hopefully be having a scan and even more hopefully be hearing a happy healthy heartbeat.

If my numbers go down, then I think it's a case of continuing to monitor, but expecting a miscarriage to happen. She thinks the bleeding that I had probably was "normal" period bleeding, though she's not discounting the possibility of the vanishing twin syndrome. She did say that a D&C or miscarriage pill isn't something to consider at this point as I could have a viable pregnancy.

So it's a waiting game, but there's a plan in place. I was so worried and nervous when we went in today, but I think of all the things I imagined, this was the best possible outcome. I knew we wouldn't have solid answers today, but this makes me feel better about things.

Oh dodger - I soooooo hope that this is the beginning of some good news for you. That there is some hope is great news! I will have my fingers crossed for you until Monday and I will hope with all my heart for good news for you

 

[dodgercpkl]

Ladies, I'm looking for some advice. I've got just one sister, who I love and adore so much. She is literally the best big sister in the world. When i went to tell her I was pregnant last week all I had to say was 'I've got some news' and she said known for weeks! But tonight I found out that she got pregnant 2 weeks after me but is going through a mc right now. She goes in for a d&c on Mon. She is so amazing and brave that she didn't want to tell me as she didn't want to take away from my happiness or worry me, but our parents told her they thought she should tell me now, esp since we are all about to spend Christmas together. I feel devastated for her and so awful that I had been waving my happy scan pictures under her nose last weekend just as she was in awful limbo of not knowing what was going to happen to her baby. It must be so hard for her seeing my scan pics and my bump starting to grow and knowing she should be at almost the same stage. I'm not sure I would be holding it together like she is if the situation was reversed. She has had an even harder and longer ttc journey than i did. I know I can't do or say anything to change the situation, but do you ladies have any advice on anything I can say or do to comfort her?

I think Struth hit the nail on the head with her response. Let her know that you are so sad for her and then listen. The thing that helped me the most as I thought I was going through a miscarriage, was having people just simply say they were sorry and then let me talk about whatever I could. Cliche words and stuff are best to stay away from right now because although they might be true, more often then not they just seem to hit the wrong spot.

Oh dodger - I soooooo hope that this is the beginning of some good news for you. That there is some hope is great news! I will have my fingers crossed for you until Monday and I will hope with all my heart for good news for you

Thank you! Me too, oh definitely me too! I have a gut feeling that tells me that this second chance is going to be a good healthy 8 month long one, and I'm hoping that my gut is right in this like it was for the numbers going up.

 

[MrsReiver]

Dodger, oh wow, I can't imagine the emotions that are raging through your system right now, I have everything crossed that this works out well for you. So much baby dust flying your way. How wonderful would a Christmas miracle be??

Snowflake, the other ladies have been spot on. Let her know how you are feeling, and let her talk talk talk if she needs to. It's all I wanted to do for a long time, I just wanted to talk about my baby, to make it real for other people, like my little baby was a person.

I have a lovely friend here who had her baby boy the same week I lost our angel, and the best thing she did for me - and I'm not sure this would work for everyone, was let me hold her beautiful boy. It took me time before i was able to, but Jen made sure I knew he was available for cuddles whenever I wanted. The other week I just held him close and sobbed and sobbed my heart out - Jen cried as well. It was such an amazing release. When you have your baby, it will be hard for your sister and she might not want to hold her niece/nephew, or she might do what I did, and hold the baby and cry. Either way that will be her way of dealing with it and I know you will let her do whatever she needs to do, in her own time.

Well my temps are still high - trying not to read too much into that - FF friend detected ovulation on the 11th December - so I'll POAS 14 days after that which is.........!!! So at this special time of year, I am putting it all in God's hands and just trying to chill out!

 

[struth]

Fluffette - I hope you get your Christmas bfp

Dodger - I have everything crossed for you and I'm hoping that your bean is super sticky and will be your Christmas miracle

 

[dodgercpkl]

Dodger, oh wow, I can't imagine the emotions that are raging through your system right now, I have everything crossed that this works out well for you. So much baby dust flying your way. How wonderful would a Christmas miracle be??

Thank you! I also can't help but think what an amazing story it would be to tell our child later in life. Right now, I'm feeling pretty good! I just have a gut feeling that tells me that this time it's going to be ok. I thought this weekend was going to drive me crazy, but I am actually pretty relaxed! I have to remind myself that we are still waiting on numbers and not going directly to the scan. lol

I had my first experience with morning sickness yesterday as well as backaches for the last couple of days, and all of that is just adding to my sense of well being. It makes me feel like there is a living baby in there that's healthy and growing and having fun with mommy's body!

I have a lovely friend here who had her baby boy the same week I lost our angel, and the best thing she did for me - and I'm not sure this would work for everyone, was let me hold her beautiful boy. It took me time before i was able to, but Jen made sure I knew he was available for cuddles whenever I wanted. The other week I just held him close and sobbed and sobbed my heart out - Jen cried as well. It was such an amazing release. When you have your baby, it will be hard for your sister and she might not want to hold her niece/nephew, or she might do what I did, and hold the baby and cry. Either way that will be her way of dealing with it and I know you will let her do whatever she needs to do, in her own time.

Well my temps are still high - trying not to read too much into that - FF friend detected ovulation on the 11th December - so I'll POAS 14 days after that which is.........!!! So at this special time of year, I am putting it all in God's hands and just trying to chill out!

Wow! What a neat thing for your friend to do. I bet it felt good to release all of that tension and pain. *hugs* I'm so glad you had a friend that knew just what to offer!

I'm going to pray for a Christmas miracle for you! You are right, it's all in God's hands and not much that we can do to affect things one way or the other. I know He's got a plan for us both and I pray that that plan means you getting your LO this cycle!!

Fluffette - I hope you get your Christmas bfp

Dodger - I have everything crossed for you and I'm hoping that your bean is super sticky and will be your Christmas miracle

Thank you!!! Me too! I believe that I was given this 2nd chance for a reason and I definitely believe in miracles!

 

[snowflake9]

Thank you so much for all your advice, you are very wise ladies. I met up with her and as you suggested told her how sorry I was and just let her talk. She's being incredibly brave but I can tell she's going through hell. She keeps saying she doesn't want to miss out on any parts of my pregnancy and wants me still to tell her everything but I've told her when she needs me to shut up she just needs to tell me. I still can't really believe it.

Wow, dodger that is a really amazing story, I have everything crossed for a Christmas miracle for you

Fluffette, I really hope you get your bfp, would be the best ever Christmas present

 

[struth]

Thank you so much for all your advice, you are very wise ladies. I met up with her and as you suggested told her how sorry I was and just let her talk. She's being incredibly brave but I can tell she's going through hell. She keeps saying she doesn't want to miss out on any parts of my pregnancy and wants me still to tell her everything but I've told her when she needs me to shut up she just needs to tell me. I still can't really believe it.

Wow, dodger that is a really amazing story, I have everything crossed for a Christmas miracle for you

Fluffette, I really hope you get your bfp, would be the best ever Christmas present

Your sister sounds like an amazingly strong lady - and it also sounds like you have a great relationship with her too. Just keep those lines of communication open and she will really treasure having you there to talk to and to vent to. I didn't have that as we hadn't told anyone really and I really missed the chance to just talk and cry and hug someone who cared. It will help her no end.

 

[MrsReiver]

AAAAAAAAAARG! I couldn't wait til Sunday and now I'm doing an "is there or isn't there" over a possible faint line that may or may not be there.

Why do we do it to ourselves?

 

[Trishg21]

Well my temps are still high - trying not to read too much into that - FF friend detected ovulation on the 11th December - so I'll POAS 14 days after that which is.........!!! So at this special time of year, I am putting it all in God's hands and just trying to chill out!

It is so hard to wait during that time! I hope Santa brings you an awesome gift this year!

I had my first experience with morning sickness yesterday as well as backaches for the last couple of days, and all of that is just adding to my sense of well being. It makes me feel like there is a living baby in there that's healthy and growing and having fun with mommy's body!

That sounds good! It would totally reassure me too. Grow little bean grow!