RANT - Annoying Husband

[maddy1]

So I just had my 9+2 U/S and got to see baby, HB and movements too. I was so happy and even more so because my SO was at the appt to share the experience.

Things got annoying when, the minute we left the Drs office, I saw that my husband had posted the U/S video to share with his family and mine. This and along with the hormones made me lose it! I was PISSED. I would like to be asked or be shown BEFORE its shared. and on top of everything, he CANNOT see my point of view.

After a yelling match and me accused of being selfish, im just trying to figure our how to explain to him that i want these to be private moments and to have a min to enjoy them. Yeah I get its our first baby but tbh, i was never shown any of his siblings kids u/s or had updates thru-out their pregnancies!

for a little context - He did the same thing last week after the week 8 appt. After the appt he decided it was ok to tell family and called his parents before we could discuss it! i mean yeah we had a loss in Nov 2015, are really happy now that we are expecting again but because of that experience im a little guarded still and not as enthusiastic as him. Im taking each day at a time while he is just going around telling who ever will listen!!!!

am I losing it for no reason?????

 

[stiletto_mom]

No, you are in the right. Your husband is being inconsiderate. You are both supposed to be on the same page, and if you're not, he should be erring on the side of caution before making a decision about it without you.

 

[Peanut112]

To see his point of view… He's just excited. Be happy that he's excited! Although he could be more considerate of your feelings.

My OH doesn't want to tell a soul… and we fight sooo much about that. It's putting a strain on our relationship. Like he doesn't want or care for the baby… I would give anything.. ANYTHING.. for my OH to be over the moon, obnoxiously excited.

 

[DannaD]

Tell him what I told my OH, "it's a picture of my insides, I decide if or when I want people to see it"
Seriously though, I get that he's upsetting you but it is great that he is feeling so happy about the pregnancy, a lot of men aren't very enthusiastic before baby is born

 

[smileyfaces]

Yes you should discuss it first. Its great he is excited but I agree with you that you should be able to enjoy it yourselves first before immediately sharing with everyone else before you have had time to absorb it.

 

[BabyBlondex]

Tbh he just seems excited so he is going to want to show everyone! It's his baby aswel. I think men get shoved to the back a bit during pregnancy they say and do all the wrong things even during the labour , but it's only because their excited to meet the little one, try to go easy on him getting yourself worked up like this isn't going to make you feel any better

 

[maryanne1987]

I agree with the other ladies. He's probably just excited. And as much as it is your body it's still his baby too. He probably should have asked first but it isn't the worst thing in the world. Maybe agree before hand next time what your want shared and what you want to keep private. My partner is the over excited type too, he drives me insane sometimes but I know I should be grateful as There's so many ladies here that I'm sure would be really happy to have a partner show such excitement or some to just have a man supporting them. So although he's really annoyed you try and maybe just let this one go. Congratulations on a great scan!

 

[maddy1]

Ladies,

thanks so much for helping me see different sides to this, and I'm really thankful that the scan was all good. I've never made it to this point in a pregnancy and cant wait to get into the 2nd tri. Its been a long journey, and I think its made me really guarded...

Also the fatigue makes me so cranky that I just lashed out. I think I need to start believing that this is finally happening and enjoy it. still so many milestones to clear, good luck to you all! and THANK YOU for the advice. it REALLLLY means a whole lot to me!!!

 

[cskme_]

My husband isn't even coming to my first scan, he doesn't seem to care in the least. On top of that he said he doesn't want anyone knowing until waaay further down the road (he's talking like 20 weeks) you DO absolutely have a reason to be angry but also remember he's very excited. I would love to have at least half that reaction come from my SO.

 

[medic76097]

If it makes you feel better, my DH actually called his ex wife first to tell her we were having our first baby. Without telling me. And they don't talk at all. He thought he would break the news to her and hope she wasn't angry.....I lost my mind. How dare he share something with her like that without asking me first. But he learned and didn't make the same mistake again

 

[minties]

If be sharing the video right away too, and would be delighted if my OH was as excited. He hasn't told a single person that I am pregnant.

 

[Enasy]

My husband didn't tell his best mate until I was 35weeks with our first lol I used to feel like I was nagging all the time asking him if he had told them yet. Try and see the positive amongst the frustration life's too short

 

[hanni]

I'm not a sharer so I'd be pissed. I can see why you're annoyed. Some people don't like things like that shared, he could have at least discussed it with you first so you could come to a compromise or you'd at least expect it.

 

[mummy2boysx]

I think it goes both ways. I would have been pistes too.. but it's also his pregnancy.. His baby. He can't feel like he has to be a second class parent cause he's not carrying it xx