Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[Noelle610]

That's a nice long stretch, gaia! That early evening waking is usually a result of baby being overtired. I can't quite recall, how are his daytime naps?

 

[gaiagirl]

They're a bit all over the place. Sometimes 2 hours, sometimes 40 min. Yesterday was over 2 hours in the morning, then 2 40min ones later. I try not to let him go more than 2 hours without napping, although it was 2.5 before bed.

 

[gaiagirl]

He almost never gets to the point of showing tired cues, like rubbing eyes or yawning. Sometimes he will get a little fussy right before it's nap time. I've tried really hard to not let him get overtired though!

His bedtime used to be later like 9/10 but we have been doing 7:30-8:30 for awhile. He definitely treats the first bit like a nap. Often after one resettling he will go 1.5-2 hours but it's never really a long stretch until he's in our room or in bed with me!

 

[Noelle610]

Yeah, some kids don't show signs - including my own. We had to go by the clock. You might want to try shortening your wake times evey more. Try 90 minutes and see how that goes. If he's really overtired from fragmented night sleep, he may need less wake time.

 

[gaiagirl]

We used to do 90 min wake time but he started fighting it and needing more time before a nap. But in the morning it's usually 90min and if he has a short nap I'll usually try for another 90 min later! It's tough because with a short nap and 90min awake we have four or more naps a day! Can't wait for the days of 2...

No matter how well rested, this baby has NEVER accepted that it's truly night time until 9/10pm! Lol

 

[Shadowy Lady]

Noelle - you are right I think she's napping too much (lol never thought this would become a problem).

Today she napped from 9:45 am to 10:45 am exactly. It's 12:45 pm now and she's still wide awake. I'm gonna try putting her down at around 1:30 and let her nap only till 3 pm. Hoping this may help. I don't know anyone her age that naps as long :/

 

[gaiagirl]

Shadowy, I can't wait for that! Maybe I can actually go out and do more during the day, lol. Sometimes I feel trapped at home because he doesn't nap well out and about!

On the other hand...less naps = less mommy time during the day!

 

[Noelle610]

Shadowy Lady, it's a great problem to have! If naps are already on the long side, she'll likely not have a huge issue with the 3 to 2 transition.

 

[Shadowy Lady]

Gaia - ur LO is younger I bet as he gets older he would be able to nap no matter where. Sofia still naps better in her crib but she doesn't mind the stroller either

Noelle - I do hope so, you always give the best advice on this forum I just put her down at 1:40 pm about 3 hours since she last woke up. She went down right away...I'm hoping this would resolve the issue. I know I can't control her poop (lol) but she's actually annoyed when she wakes up pooping. She never seemed to be so cranky in the middle of the night before.

 

[MiniKiwi]

Thanks so much for all the advice and hugs ladies, this thread is so wonderful

Notnic, thank you - we tried something similar to what you suggested last night. Not quite the same but I put Mia in her cot at 7:05pm, full and clean etc. and put my hand on her tummy, my other hand stroking her hair and loudly shhhhed. She cried a little bit but was actually asleep by 7:15pm. 10 minutes of shhing and patting. That felt like a huge success

She slept until 8:45pm and needed resettling then didn't wake until 1:30am when she had a 1.5 hour motn party and I fed and changed her. She slept until 7am and then my mum took her and me and OH slept until 8:30am Such a great night!!!!!!!!!!

Noelle, I'm not really comfortable with sleep training and was very nervous about putting her to bed last night but it went much better than expected. I'm hoping tonight goes just as smoothly. Oh and I thought you might find this funny - I was telling OH some of your advice and I refer to you as 'the BnB sleep lady'

 

[Noelle610]

, the "BnB Sleep Lady"!!! I love it I think you girls give me too much credit... I just throw some ideas out there and sometimes they stick

 

[Boo44]

Haha mini kiwi I refer to you all as my 'forum friends' - whenever we have an issue I say to my hubby 'I'll just ask my forum friends...!' Think he trusts you all lol

Noelle when exactly are Charlotte's naps? We're on 2 a day and have been trying to reduce the duration in order to help his early morning wakings. I'm aiming for max of an hour am and an hour pm. Today his pm nap was a car nap and was an hour earlier than usual and only 30 mins long. He woke at 2pm. I was absolutely convinced he would need a power nap in order to get to his bedtime but he was so happy and absolutely fine. He was awake for 5hrs and 15 mins before bed! Seems too much to me.

Am not sure what the 'ideal' is as far as a nap that isn't too long or too short, and what sort of gap I should have before his bed?

We actually had a 7.30am this morning!!!!! I did go to him at 6am and gave his dummy once then straight back to sleep until 7.30. Fantastic and the latest morning we've had in months xx

 

[pompeyvix]

Thanks for your replies ladies!

pompeyvix - How are you getting her to sleep? And when are the naps usually?

Sometimes she will go into her cot awake and take herself off to sleep, but this is rare. If she is crying, I have her nap on me or if she is due for a nap and we are going out, she will do so in the car seat. There is no routine/time with her naps, very sporadic! I know she can self settle because at night she is fine....

Pompey, hi! What's your LO's night sleep like? If I'm remembering correctly, she is sleeping in quite late? I'm wondering if she's combining her night sleep and first nap.

Her night sleep is really good now. She is put down awake and takes herself to sleep. Usually one dream feed around midnight and she then sleeps through til 10 (it's not always been like this, this is a recent thing!)

Yes she is a late riser, she wakes between 9.30 and 10.30 each day....perhaps you are right, sleeping this late could be classed as her first nap of the day. I never thought of it like that before but sounds about right?
I don't want to change this though, as it means I can wake naturally and then get all my morning jobs done by the time she wakes. I just wish her subsequent naps could be more than 30 mins a pop!

 

[izzlesnizzle]

I went to bed armed with a plan last night. This 5am wake up thing has to stop. So I had set the alarm for 4.30am to go in and reposition her to slightly rouse her for her to enter a new sleep cycle and break the habit of waking up at 5, resetting her body clock.

HA! I think she must have heard me. Instead the little minx woke up at 3am and would not go back to sleep!

I downloaded an app on my phone yesterday of white noise. I put it on (awful sound) and sat with my hand through the bar with my hand on her tummy for 30 mins and eventually she went back to sleep until 6am. Then OH got up and put some toys in her cot and she had a little play then went back to sleep until 6.40am.

Tonight, im going to put her favourite toys in her cot, she can even have the remote control if she wants it (minus the batteries of course, don't want any nasty accidents!).

I wonder if her waking at 3 has broken the 5am habit without me having to do it for her? But I don want 3am to be the new 5am!

I think she was overtired from getting up at 5 the morning before and she only had just on 2 hrs of naps yesterday all in all. I find 2 hrs of naps doesn't help her night sleep. A baby her age is supposed to have 14 hrs sleep a day, shes only getting 12-13 because of the early wake ups so we are in a lose lose situation at the moment. But I will win win, I will haha!

 

[Iren_iren]

I am starting to read this thread from the beginning as LO is sleeping in my arms..
But few questions meanwhile...I just don't know where to start
Here is our sleeping routine:
4 naps a day, first and last in my arms, 2 in between in his pram. It's not fun when the weather is bad, but I a more or less ok with that. The problem is when we are at home.
He just won't get it, that he needs to sleep in his bed. I tried several times putting him there drowsy but awake and he ends up screaming, but its bit too early for CIO, so not keen to leave him there just cry. As soon as I pick him up, he nods off in my arms.
I've tried put down pick up method, but just for a day. He just gets more frustrated and inconsolable.
I know I have been rocking him to sleep all his life, so I do t expect to change overnight, just don't know how to make it gradual process.

Bed time: bath, bottle/nursing (I combifeed) and he is asleep in my arms then I transfer him to his cot (next to our bed). Past few weeks he go e from waking 1-2 for a feed to waking 3-5 times screaming and won't stop until I feed him or sometimes just putting back his dummy works. He sleeps from around 8.30pm to 5.30-6am. Not keen for hi sleeping in our bed, so just take him after he wakes up
Around 9 hours sleep during the night and 3 during the day, so I do th think he is having enough...

Sorry that its bit too long, but I don't know where to start, should I deal with daytime naps first or sort his night time. How on earth I make him go to bed awake and fell asleep and not screaming
I really want to do so etching about it now as i am going back to work when he will be 8 month and I can't see things improving without me doing so etching about it and I wo t be able to function if it will carry on like this
Thanks

 

[Noelle610]

Haha mini kiwi I refer to you all as my 'forum friends' - whenever we have an issue I say to my hubby 'I'll just ask my forum friends...!' Think he trusts you all lol

Noelle when exactly are Charlotte's naps? We're on 2 a day and have been trying to reduce the duration in order to help his early morning wakings. I'm aiming for max of an hour am and an hour pm. Today his pm nap was a car nap and was an hour earlier than usual and only 30 mins long. He woke at 2pm. I was absolutely convinced he would need a power nap in order to get to his bedtime but he was so happy and absolutely fine. He was awake for 5hrs and 15 mins before bed! Seems too much to me.

Am not sure what the 'ideal' is as far as a nap that isn't too long or too short, and what sort of gap I should have before his bed?

We actually had a 7.30am this morning!!!!! I did go to him at 6am and gave his dummy once then straight back to sleep until 7.30. Fantastic and the latest morning we've had in months xx

So happy for you! It's 6:40am here and Charlotte is still sleeping. This is the latest she's slept in a long time . It's nice.

Naps are hard and you just have to kind of play around with it, but here's our general schedule. The naps range from 1-2 hours, but are generally closer to 1 hour/90 minutes now:

6:30am wake

9am-10am nap 1

1:30pm-3pm nap 2

7pm bedtime

Hope that helps! I try to do no more than 4 hours between last nap and bedtime. Anything longer and she tends to get overtired and wake up screaming 45 minutes after bedtime.

 

[Noelle610]

Her night sleep is really good now. She is put down awake and takes herself to sleep. Usually one dream feed around midnight and she then sleeps through til 10 (it's not always been like this, this is a recent thing!)

Yes she is a late riser, she wakes between 9.30 and 10.30 each day....perhaps you are right, sleeping this late could be classed as her first nap of the day. I never thought of it like that before but sounds about right?
I don't want to change this though, as it means I can wake naturally and then get all my morning jobs done by the time she wakes. I just wish her subsequent naps could be more than 30 mins a pop!

What time does she go to bed? If it's 8pm or earlier, she's definitely consolidating night sleep and her first nap. Some babies tend to do this! You can either leave it, or you can wake her no later than 7am to preserve that first nap. You may have more success doing that as the schedule will be a bit more age appropriate.

I hear you on having the alone time though!

 

[Noelle610]

I went to bed armed with a plan last night. This 5am wake up thing has to stop. So I had set the alarm for 4.30am to go in and reposition her to slightly rouse her for her to enter a new sleep cycle and break the habit of waking up at 5, resetting her body clock.

HA! I think she must have heard me. Instead the little minx woke up at 3am and would not go back to sleep!

I downloaded an app on my phone yesterday of white noise. I put it on (awful sound) and sat with my hand through the bar with my hand on her tummy for 30 mins and eventually she went back to sleep until 6am. Then OH got up and put some toys in her cot and she had a little play then went back to sleep until 6.40am.

Tonight, im going to put her favourite toys in her cot, she can even have the remote control if she wants it (minus the batteries of course, don't want any nasty accidents!).

I wonder if her waking at 3 has broken the 5am habit without me having to do it for her? But I don want 3am to be the new 5am!

I think she was overtired from getting up at 5 the morning before and she only had just on 2 hrs of naps yesterday all in all. I find 2 hrs of naps doesn't help her night sleep. A baby her age is supposed to have 14 hrs sleep a day, shes only getting 12-13 because of the early wake ups so we are in a lose lose situation at the moment. But I will win win, I will haha!

I do think the waking likely broke her of it - she kind of used the "wake to sleep" technique on herself I accidentally dd this with Charlotte.... She had been waking 45 minutes after bedtime screaming for weeks for no obvious reason and the other night I woke her 30 minutes after bedtime accidentally by turning on my blow dryer. I didn't hear a peep from her the rest of the night!

I think you're onto something with the white noise. I'd play it all night long for her. I got a great white noise machine that I love and it's on whenever Charlotte sleeps - night and naps. I think it helps her and I also think it blocks out any noise in the house or from the street. I live in a loud neighborhood in the downtown area of my city, so it's a necessity.

I sometimes worry about the amount of sleep C gets as well. It seems to vary greatly from 13 hours to 15 hours daily.

 

[Noelle610]

I am starting to read this thread from the beginning as LO is sleeping in my arms..
But few questions meanwhile...I just don't know where to start
Here is our sleeping routine:
4 naps a day, first and last in my arms, 2 in between in his pram. It's not fun when the weather is bad, but I a more or less ok with that. The problem is when we are at home.
He just won't get it, that he needs to sleep in his bed. I tried several times putting him there drowsy but awake and he ends up screaming, but its bit too early for CIO, so not keen to leave him there just cry. As soon as I pick him up, he nods off in my arms.
I've tried put down pick up method, but just for a day. He just gets more frustrated and inconsolable.
I know I have been rocking him to sleep all his life, so I do t expect to change overnight, just don't know how to make it gradual process.

Bed time: bath, bottle/nursing (I combifeed) and he is asleep in my arms then I transfer him to his cot (next to our bed). Past few weeks he go e from waking 1-2 for a feed to waking 3-5 times screaming and won't stop until I feed him or sometimes just putting back his dummy works. He sleeps from around 8.30pm to 5.30-6am. Not keen for hi sleeping in our bed, so just take him after he wakes up
Around 9 hours sleep during the night and 3 during the day, so I do th think he is having enough...

Sorry that its bit too long, but I don't know where to start, should I deal with daytime naps first or sort his night time. How on earth I make him go to bed awake and fell asleep and not screaming
I really want to do so etching about it now as i am going back to work when he will be 8 month and I can't see things improving without me doing so etching about it and I wo t be able to function if it will carry on like this
Thanks

Hi! Welcome to our little group. I'd love to try and give you some recommendations - when does he wake for the day and how long are his naps? He's a bit young for sleep training, but I think you can first tweak your schedule and then work on some positive sleep associations to get him a bit more interested in the crib. I never thought my daughter would sleep in her crib. She loved her Rock n Play Sleeper and being in our room for quite some time. Now she's 10 months and sleeps happily in her crib all night!

 

[Iren_iren]

I am starting to read this thread from the beginning as LO is sleeping in my arms..
But few questions meanwhile...I just don't know where to start
Here is our sleeping routine:
4 naps a day, first and last in my arms, 2 in between in his pram. It's not fun when the weather is bad, but I a more or less ok with that. The problem is when we are at home.
He just won't get it, that he needs to sleep in his bed. I tried several times putting him there drowsy but awake and he ends up screaming, but its bit too early for CIO, so not keen to leave him there just cry. As soon as I pick him up, he nods off in my arms.
I've tried put down pick up method, but just for a day. He just gets more frustrated and inconsolable.
I know I have been rocking him to sleep all his life, so I do t expect to change overnight, just don't know how to make it gradual process.

Bed time: bath, bottle/nursing (I combifeed) and he is asleep in my arms then I transfer him to his cot (next to our bed). Past few weeks he go e from waking 1-2 for a feed to waking 3-5 times screaming and won't stop until I feed him or sometimes just putting back his dummy works. He sleeps from around 8.30pm to 5.30-6am. Not keen for hi sleeping in our bed, so just take him after he wakes up
Around 9 hours sleep during the night and 3 during the day, so I do th think he is having enough...

Sorry that its bit too long, but I don't know where to start, should I deal with daytime naps first or sort his night time. How on earth I make him go to bed awake and fell asleep and not screaming
I really want to do so etching about it now as i am going back to work when he will be 8 month and I can't see things improving without me doing so etching about it and I wo t be able to function if it will carry on like this
Thanks

Hi! Welcome to our little group. I'd love to try and give you some recommendations - when does he wake for the day and how long are his naps? He's a bit young for sleep training, but I think you can first tweak your schedule and then work on some positive sleep associations to get him a bit more interested in the crib. I never thought my daughter would sleep in her crib. She loved her Rock n Play Sleeper and being in our room for quite some time. Now she's 10 months and sleeps happily in her crib all night!

Thanks Noelle610!
6am he is up for the day, but that varies from 5.15 to 6.30 (on a rare good day if he naps in a pram that can be 1,5 (40min, then wakes up, look around and fells asleep again) and in my arms from 30 min to 2 hours.
Usually first nap 8-9am
Second 10.30-12 or 11 to 1 (with some awake time in between)
3rd around 3pm for about 30 min
Last 5pm to 6 or past few days till 6.30pm
Would really love to hear your suggestions. It's great that you've manged to make your girl sleep in her crib and I did not realise how hard it could be