Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[stephie_corin]

Amy, I hope Chloe is ok! It's so frightening when that happens. Cully has fallen and split the webbing between the top gum and his lip twice now and there is so much blood! That's a late nap! Poor baby girl. Do you find she's more clumsy when naps are bad and she's tired? I have to watch Cully like a hawk when he's tired because he's so much more likely to slip over. It still doesn't help though and he always ends up falling over.

Lysh, yep I just consistently rocked him and now he doesn't usually wake before 6am. We bed share and from about 5-530 I'm still usually awake and rocking/feeding him but not every day. I'm definitely seeing improvements.

Polaris, happy birthday to Clara! Have a lovely week with your mum!

SE, stay positive. I read on Kellymom that nursing strikes are really common at his age. I sent you the link - it's got some good tips. If it is the end - you did GREAT! Better than great - you've been working and pumping and I admire your commitment. Try to relax and know it's in munchkin's hands now. If he wants to nurse he will come back to it.

We've been having some crazy MOTN parties. Generally his sleep is great - he's doing 1.5-2 hour stretches but the last few nights he's had these weird periods of just being awake. A couple of times he's been awake around 1.5 hours but last night it took 3 hours to get him back to sleep.

What do you guys do for MOTN parties? Do you let baby play? I spent two hours and 50 minutes rocking him last night and then lost my patience and woke DH who then put him to sleep in ten minutes! I'm not sure of the best way to handle these baby parties.

 

[lysh]

SE- Sorry, I am sure it is a shock to have it happen suddenly? Is your LO usually an avid nurser?

Well, yesterday naps were okay, but none in her crib as one was in the car and the other in my arms. I decided not to push the crib for her second nap because I moved an inch and she started to stir.....I figured after a few days of inconsistency, I would let her catnap on me. This is what happens during the school year. I get home from picking her up and I end up sitting on the couch for an hour while she naps from exhaustion. :/ Oh, how I wish I could easily stick her in her cribs for naps. Sometimes the list of things I need to get done are very overwhelming due to the fact that she goes to bed 8-8:30, wakes up around 5, and has a hard time napping anywhere but on me.

 

[lysh]

Stephie- Honestly, for MOTN parties, I would nurse my daughter, try rocking for a bit and put her in her crib if she would not settle....usually she would cry for a minute, I would try again. I would go through this cycle 2-3 times before just sticking her in her crib. Usually LO goes to sleep nursing, if it would not happen because she wants to be awake, I had to be firm. I think she cried once for 10-15 minutes. I did not want to start a habit I could not sustain....if I had to deal with MOTN parties and deal with work the next day, I would have lost my sanity!!!!!!

 

[bababas]

thanx everybody. yea i guess go with the flow has been very good for us now. tonight he only woke up
11:30pm
1:30pm
4:30pm
6:00pm
so my breasts were hurting, i think they got used to the crazy last week wakings. hehe. yesterday were only 2 naps though, while going with the flow.

lysh - so sorry for the 4am wake up again. if she goes later to bed does she also wake up so early? or maybe if she gets a bottle, does she sleep a bit longer?

polaris - have a great birthday day. and happy birthday clara!!!!

SE - sorry for the nursing strike. i read it could be something developmental. i on the other hand am thinking of weaning now. well he has one bottle as a substitute. not sure what i will do next. i am ready to wean though. but remember it makes me really feel sad though.

Stephie - i havent had a MOTN yet. i hope they go away for you. i think i would try just to sleep and see what he does.

Amy - sorry for the cut lip. hope she is better now. my friends toddlers dropped their naps at around 3 years. i have napped until i started school though could be a developmental thing too for Ívar he will be 3 soon.


hope i can be online next days. the owner of the house is gonna fix some stuff.... and paint windows. otherwise i catch up later.

 

[lysh]

Bababas- At 6 months of age, my LO was waking up quite a few times as well. Hopefully that will decrease another feeding soon! I will actually bring LO to bed and nurse her in bed, but she wants to wake up and play! lol She just has never needed long periods of sleep at night I guess. She is not like her mama in that respect! ha

 

[seaweed eater]

I still won't be able to respond tonight but I'm thinking of you all. The past 24 hours have been a real challenge for us. I'm staying hopeful that he will be able to nurse again but so far it's been tough for both of us to adjust. Trying to remember that in the scheme of things this isn't a big deal at all.

 

[bababas]

thinking of you SE. Munchkin and Ívar have the same birthday YAY

When I wanted to put Aron to bed last night, he just wasnt sleepy, rather laughing at everything. but I was so dead tired already. so I just put him in his bed. and we went to watch Broadchurch.

He fell asleep by himself whined a bit later but didnt wake up until
11:30pm
2:30am
4:30am (think he whined twice after this time, but i hardly woke up, dont remember if he stopped or if i fed him a bit)
6:30am what an improvement from last weeks. seems my boobs are getting used to that schedule now. they are not painful today.

i slept on my wrong side though. so strange if i sleep at my right side i have been waking up dizzy. anybody knows what that might be.

 

[stephie_corin]

Lysh, I really feel for you. It's so hard when you've got a child that seems to be able to survive on such little sleep! What happens if you put her to bed earlier? Thanks for the advice on the MOTN parties. I agree - best not to get up and play - I really don't want to encourage him!

Bababas, what great nights you've been having! That's wonderful news! And he fell asleep by himself?!? WOW! That's like the second holy grail of baby sleep (STTN being the first I guess!).

SE, you know I'm thinking of you. Big hugs my dear friend.

We seem to be firmly on one nap at the moment. I'm watching for sleepy cues but they don't happen until 4 hours after first wakeup and then - provided he takes a good nap, which he has been - he seems to be able to go for HOURS! Last night we had an 830pm sleep (after waking at 1230) and then he was awake again at 9pm. He seemed really tired this morning - but unable to sleep. So tonight I brought out the exercise ball and bounced him to sleep at 7pm. I hope it doesn't backfire but I really feel he needs more sleep at night if he is staying awake so long during the day.

I hope all is well with everyone!

 

[lysh]

Lysh, I really feel for you. It's so hard when you've got a child that seems to be able to survive on such little sleep! What happens if you put her to bed earlier? Thanks for the advice on the MOTN parties. I agree - best not to get up and play - I really don't want to encourage him!

She just wakes up earlier!!! lol I told DH I want to try shifting bedtime back 15min. to see what happens now that she is older. She was up at 4 again this morning....wondering if she was too overtired....her naps are changing again!

 

[stephie_corin]

Lysh, that's tough! My first thought was that she was overtired, hence the early morning wakeup. It might be worth a shot trying for an earlier bedtime now she's older? When she switches to one nap that might help her sleep longer too as she won't be able to play catch up on her night sleep with that first nap. I did read recently that pushing the first nap forward can help night sleep for that very reason.

 

[seaweed eater]

Stephie, Munchkin and Cully seem to be on a similar wake time pattern (as usual). Are you purely GWTF or are you doing anything in terms of wake times or scheduling his nap? I've been aiming for 12-12:30 for the start of Munchkin's nap but with the amount of stimulation (or lack thereof) he gets on weekends that seems to push bedtime too late. I've also been giving him a 5-min nap in the car (I'm trying to mirror daycare exactly) but maybe it would be better to avoid the nap and put him down closer to 11...something to try next weekend. Things are a little out of control here at the moment due to the nursing situation, anyway!

Bababas, that does sound like SUCH an improvement, I'm so glad and so wonderful that he self-settled!! I'm sure even better nights are ahead for you.

Lysh, so sorry about the continued early mornings. I would echo what Stephie said. Noelle has advised people in this thread to deal with early mornings by stretching out the first wake time so that the first nap is around when it's supposed to be.

I'm hoping that this crazy not nursing thing will at least help us learn more about Munchkin's needs and habits, if no other good comes of it. Here's something we discovered this morning: it is now possible to transfer him from his carseat and have him stay asleep in his crib! I hadn't tried that in months. Also, bizarrely, yesterday he fell asleep sucking on a pacifier (he'd always refused them), but he hasn't done it again since so I think I'm going to stop trying that unless I'm really out of ideas.

 

[lysh]

Stephie and SE- The past few days she has been taking one 1 1/2 hour nap. I am wondering if she is overtired too....I started bath time at 7:20- wanted it to be 7:15 but DH was running late. I am going to shoot for bedtime even earlier tomorrow and see what happens. She is sleeping from 11 ish- 12:30. Of course that is with me nursing her for half of it....like I said, who the heck knows what will happen when I go back to work! And then of course the time change is around the corner!

 

[gaiagirl]

Hi Ladies! SE thinking of you and the crazy striking situation! Definitely intrigued to see how it all plays out. Must be sooo tough, I hope it resolves soon...

I think F may have been napping TOO much lately. 3 hours of naps and he is not ready for bed at bedtime.

Yesterday was 1.5 hours total and bed was way easier. Today was nuts with traveling to a nearby town for a friends bday party, so we will see.

 

[bababas]

I went first here instead of reading the newspaper coz Aron only woke up 1am today for a drink. so i thought I will change his diaper when he wakes 3. But then he kept on sleeping. my boobs felt like rocks.... So I woke him at 7am.

We had a bad bedtime though, coz of a late nap yesterday. And the owner of the house is taking some furniture so we were working me and OH and had Aron on the floor... he wasnt always happy about that. Poor guy. So at bedtime he was strange. That in the end I just gave him boobie to make him fall asleep. I felt so bad coz I let him cry first a bit. I thought he would settle. poor guy. Feel so bad for that and his diaper. But when he got boobie he fell asleep right away.

SE - how is the not nursing thing going? does he take the bottle instead though? I remember I was only able to transfer ds1 and ds2 one time each without waking from the car seat aron has those weird days where he actually takes the pacifier.

lysh - i hope the early bed time will work. let us know. i remember when Ívar ds1 was around that age he would take 3 days a month waking 5am. until he was 2 years old. i thought it was something developmental. but I hope your daughter will not do this until she is 2. waking up 4am.

gaigagirl - Aron is showing signs of having difficult time sleeping with too much day sleep also now. he had a late nap yesterday.... and bedtime was one of those bad days. have to watch out, i fell asleep in his nap with him that was the problem.

 

[lysh]

SE- I keep meaning to ask- was your LO an avid nurser before going on strike?? What have you been giving your LO instead?

bababas- Thanks- these early mornings are exhausting. At least you got some unexpected sleep!!! It would be annoying when that would first happen though and then I would wake up because my breasts were so uncomfortable!

Well, DD woke up at 12:30am screaming. She has not done that in a long time!!! It took me 45 minutes to get her back to sleep. She did not want to settle easily. I eventually put her in her crib and she was okay as long as I kept my hand on her face. If I went to move it at all, she freaked out and grabbed it. So I sang to her until she fell in a deep enough sleep that I was able to retreat back to bed. Of course it took me forever to fall back asleep and then she was up for the day at 5:10.

I honestly feel like she does not get enough sleep in general!!!! I will keep slowly shifting to an earlier bedtime to see what happens. I also had a 'duh' moment this morning. Not only are naps seemingly moving to 1 per day, but she is standing on her own now!! So she is learning new skills and will probably begin walking any day now. I blame the midnight wakening on that...she was so excited yesterday with her ability to stand up from crawling position!

 

[seaweed eater]

Lysh, he was nursing 8-10 times a day! I'm worried because people say 3-4 days is pretty normal but for him that means a lot more bottles/nursing refusals than for most babies his age.

Bababas, fortunately he's taking a bottle ok so we're not concerned about his health/dehydration but I'm afraid he may not be motivated enough to BF. And I am unable to pump enough to keep up with him at the moment.

This is so stressful... 3:45 AM, he took a bottle and fell asleep and then woke up again. So DH stayed up with him while I pumped another one. Then I gave it to him and he fell asleep again. Now I'm pumping again. I've been up for an hour already. I think we have to do some more aggressive sleep training to reduce his dependence on feeding before sleep. I'm not sure what else to do I also think it's not good that I'm holding him in nursing position and giving him bottles at night. I've just been desperate for him to fall asleep but it's probably not helping his motivation to nurse. Ah, he's awake again...excellent.

 

[lysh]

SE- Wow, that would be like my LO suddenly refusing to nurse!!! She nurses ALL the time for everything. I would be in shock too. Pumping is hard. So many teachers I worked with would pump once a day and get 8 oz. I would have to pump during both my breaks and I typically got 4-6 oz total.

That is going to be an exhausting schedule if you are doing a bottle and pumping throughout the night. Maybe you can try some water for one of the feedings so he is not dependent on it for calories?

Oh, these babies!!!! lol

 

[AmyS]

SE - I see you're still in a nursing strike. I can't imagine how that must feel...it's one thing to plan weaning at a certain time, but completely different when they decide on their own! I hope it's only temporary - but I like that you are also seeing the positive side of things by learning about his new habits. I have still been feeding Chloe to sleep, and was hoping that she would just spontaneously decide one day that she didn't need it anymore! haha I'm in the same boat as you and wondering if I'll need to do sleep training to break that sleep crutch. Sorry you had a bad night!

Stephie - She was okay! It just bled a lot, and she cried really hard until daddy let her suck on an ice pack. That really helped! How are your motn parties? Have you just been trying to get him back to sleep instead of playing? I like the idea that someone mentioned of just letting them crawl around in the dark until they're ready to pass out again - but I'd guess you'd need a floor bed for that.

bababas - Sounds like things are definitely improving for you! I remember when I was 4 years old that I didn't take naps - I went to play with a friend one day, and I thought it was so odd that her mom made us lay down to take a nap! I didn't visit her again, haha.

lysh - Sorry for the early wake ups! Chloe went through that a couple months ago, and I would just rock her to help her back to sleep until it was time to get up. Some days I would rock from 4-6am just to keep her asleep. Those were tough mornings! How exciting that she is learning so much! I know developmental times suck for sleep, but if I remind myself that Chloe is learning a lot, it always makes it seem not so bad.
________________

The weekend - I always read here, but I'm always on my phone and hate thumb typing one handed.

Naps are just off! Saturday, I started trying at 9, which only gave her 2 hours of wake time - bad idea on my part, but I thought she was acting tired. Daddy finally got her to bed at 10am, in her crib! She slept until 11:30am, and then he woke her up because we had visitors and were supposed to go out for lunch. The she didn't take her afternoon nap until 5-5:30pm.

Yesterday, she wouldn't fall asleep in the morning, so her first nap was 12pm-1:15pm, and the 2nd nap was 3:30 -5pm. Too much sleep, I think, because she didn't go down easily.

I can tell that she's going through developmental stuff too, since she's been practicing pulling up to stand all day - and then in her sleep, she does the downward facing dog yoga pose! She was very unsettled all night long because of this.

 

[stephie_corin]

SE, we are purely going with the flow but his nap seems to be happening between 10-11am and finishing between 12-1. I guess I'm not 100% GWTF because I help him back to sleep between sleep cycles or mid cycle if he wakes, until he wakes up happy. I couldn't get him to take a cat nap earlier - he just refuses to sleep until at least 4 hours since he first woke. I'm sorry that the strike is still ongoing. Like Lysh said - it's pretty shocking how much he was nursing and then to stop all of a sudden... Mind blowing. I'm remaining hopeful for you that he comes back to nursing.

Gaia, Cully also doesn't do well at bedtime with too much day sleep. 1.5-2 seems to be our sweet spot in order for bedtime to go reasonably smoothly. Have fun and good luck at the party!

Bababas, I'm glad your amazing stretch of good sleep is continuing! I can't even remember what it feels like to be engorged. Lol. It's a feeling I would welcome back as I mentioned to Gaia, Cully is also really sensitive to too much day sleep and can be really unsettled (more so than usual) if he takes long naps. Seems to be a common theme!

Lysh, congratulations on the standing! That's fantastic news! The MOTN "party" isn't so awesome but the milestones are so exciting. I hope one nap helps you guys get a later wakeup. It might also make it easier for your caregivers to get her to nap. Oh, and Cully nurses for most of his nap too!

Amy, I'm glad Chloe is ok! The ice pack is a great idea. I don't want to make you nervous but that late AM nap and even later PM nap is exactly what Cully did before deciding he only wanted one nap! Lol. These babies definitely have their own forum and are comparing notes! Yay for the pulling to stand! I love the thought if her in her yoga pose too very cute!

Last night was a nightmare for us. I regret bouncing him to sleep because he was so unsettled last night and took three MOTN parties! Although it might also be his second front tooth. I thought it was through but it's only just cutting through today. It's now 8.30pm and he won't unlatch. He seems to want to nurse a lot when he is teething.

Also, in the last few days he has been nursing many times a day. I'm not sure if anyone remembers, but since 3-4 months of age he ONLY nursed when he was about to sleep. Now he will take a few small feeds in the morning and a few more in the afternoon. I guess now he is only taking 1 nap he's decided he wants to nurse at non-sleep times too. It's bizarre to me. He'll even nurse in the middle if the living room with stuff going on around him. And he lets me know he wants to nurse too. It's the strangest thing!

 

[AmyS]

Stephie - I remember when he would only nurse to sleep during the day! He's figured out that "mommy buffet" is open all day long! I had to laugh when you said you bounced him to sleep on your exercise ball - mine is still sitting out, although I haven't used it in a while, I have bounced Chloe for many hours! I hope his 2nd tooth makes a fast appearance - one motn party is too many, I can't imagine 3 of them!!