Rant of an Infertile Woman

[lola13]

Oh, yes, thanks for reminding me, ladies. I want to amend my original list with...

14) I hate infertility for making me feel like 35+ is old. I started ttc when I was 33, and thanks to whatever defect I have, I'm now in the age danger zone. It's made me feel old in other aspects of my life, too.

 

[Frindabelle]

The best one I get is "after all this treatment you could fall naturally"
Errr... I HAVE NO TUBES!! what part of that do you not get???? are you stupid?
aarrrrgghhhh!!!
xxx

 

[Serene123]

8) Women who already have kids but act like the world is ending b/c they can’t conceive #4. This one might ruffle a few feathers, but you can hug your kids for a little comfort. I’d like to experience motherhood, even if just once. I don’t deny your pain is real, but hopefully you can understand my position, too.


Honestly, that won't ruffle the feathers of anyone with half a brain. TTC is really freaking hard, and I could not for a minute imagine being here, still trying 15 months later, without my little girl to squeeze when things get hard.

I hope it happens soon for you. I really do.

 

[FBbaby]

8) Women who already have kids but act like the world is ending b/c they can’t conceive #4. This one might ruffle a few feathers, but you can hug your kids for a little comfort. I’d like to experience motherhood, even if just once. I don’t deny your pain is real, but hopefully you can understand my position, too.


Honestly, that won't ruffle the feathers of anyone with half a brain. TTC is really freaking hard, and I could not for a minute imagine being here, still trying 15 months later, without my little girl to squeeze when things get hard.

I hope it happens soon for you. I really do.

I totally agree too. I am ttc number three and even though I would love to be a mum again, what makes me desperate for another child is my intense desire to make my new partner a dad. He would be such an amazing one. I consider myself massively lucky to be a mum already and wouldn't for one second consider myself at the same level than anyone struggling to conceive number 1.

 

[serendippy]

2) BFP Announcements on First Month TTC – these girls are so annoying (I recognize it’s not their fault, but they still bug the crap out of me).
8) Women who already have kids but act like the world is ending b/c they can’t conceive #4. This one might ruffle a few feathers, but you can hug your kids for a little comfort. I’d like to experience motherhood, even if just once. I don’t deny your pain is real, but hopefully you can understand my position, too
-----------------------------------

These are the two that bug me altho i dont mean them too..esp point 8. I see it all the time on here, people who have got children and like u say think its the end of the world cos they are struggling to get pregnant again.
Im 43 and trying for my first.....admittedly ive only been trying just under a year but i got told today that im too old for NHS fertility treatment..so i will have to pay for everything

Also another thing that bugs me is pregnant women who moan about their symptoms..yeh im sure they are feeling ill and it cant be easy but god id love to be in the position to be having pregnancy symptoms,

Sorry if ive offended anyone

 

[wishful think]

The best one I get is "after all this treatment you could fall naturally"
Errr... I HAVE NO TUBES!! what part of that do you not get???? are you stupid?
aarrrrgghhhh!!!
xxx

Frindabelle I know that this was actually a miracle but i was watching a programme on sky ages ago - I think called extreme pregnancies or something like that and a woman who had had her 2 tubes removed because of ectopic pregnancies actually got pregnant. She wasnt trying for a baby as she thought she was unable to ever fall pregnant naturally (well obviously who would think they would get pregnant naturally with their tubes removed) and so wasn't using any birth control. Well the programme went on to explain that an egg was released by the woman's ovaries and somehow (A miracle) it travelled inside the body over to the part of the fallopian tube that was sewn up and somehow got in through a tiny part of the tube that wasnt sewn up properly, anyhow along came the spermy and wam bam thank u mam!!!! To be honest i was in complete shock watching it and i bawled crying through the whole thing saying "For jasus sake, i have my tubes and i cant get pregnant". Sometimes miracles do happen!!!!

 

[ladypink]

Hi, love this thread, im so with you ladies, here's another: "erm... I don't really know how to tell you this.. I'm really sorry... don't get upset but your brother, who is younger, not in a stable relationship etc etc.. is pregnant again by accident!!!!" "Why can't you be happy and put things in perpective... there are people dying every day and you are upset about something so small!" "Ring your brother because he's worried that you are upset!" ARRRRRAHHHHHHH! Quoting mother BTW who has been so supportive but can't say the right things!

 

[Frindabelle]

The best one I get is "after all this treatment you could fall naturally"
Errr... I HAVE NO TUBES!! what part of that do you not get???? are you stupid?
aarrrrgghhhh!!!
xxx

Frindabelle I know that this was actually a miracle but i was watching a programme on sky ages ago - I think called extreme pregnancies or something like that and a woman who had had her 2 tubes removed because of ectopic pregnancies actually got pregnant. She wasnt trying for a baby as she thought she was unable to ever fall pregnant naturally (well obviously who would think they would get pregnant naturally with their tubes removed) and so wasn't using any birth control. Well the programme went on to explain that an egg was released by the woman's ovaries and somehow (A miracle) it travelled inside the body over to the part of the fallopian tube that was sewn up and somehow got in through a tiny part of the tube that wasnt sewn up properly, anyhow along came the spermy and wam bam thank u mam!!!! To be honest i was in complete shock watching it and i bawled crying through the whole thing saying "For jasus sake, i have my tubes and i cant get pregnant". Sometimes miracles do happen!!!!

Wow! that's awesome! Awwww what a lovely story

I just think some should invent artifical tubes!
xxx

 

[elsie2010]

omg girls, you made my day! please can I join in?

BFP Announcements on First Month TTC – these girls are so annoying (I recognize it’s not their fault, but they still bug the crap out of me).

totally agree! this annoys me along with my newly married best friend who's never tried and is not trying to get pg, telling me that i just need to relax, even though her new SIL has had ivf and she is aware we're struggling. I did gentle say to her that it was lucky I was feeling strong that day or I really would have been in tears.

8) Women who already have kids but act like the world is ending b/c they can’t conceive #4.

especially want to punch the woman on the 'one show' this week who had 5 beautiful boys but she was depressed that she couldn't choose the sex of her baby and choose a girl. You have 5 beautiful boys, be grateful for what you do have!

Also another thing that bugs me is pregnant women who moan about their symptoms..yeh im sure they are feeling ill and it cant be easy but god id love to be in the position to be having pregnancy symptoms,

very much agree, and also when they now have their baby's and what a horrible, sleep deprived world they live in. Sorry but I would love to stay up all night comforting my baby who needs me. and if it even does happen and i complain then please feel free to slap me!

apologies if I've offended anyone, but I do feel better that I'm not alone in feeling like this.

 

[lola13]

Just though of another one

Self Centered People on Mothers Day - The holiday itself is lovely, and I always celebrate my beautiful mom. However, I never go to church that Sunday - is anyone aware that some of us are fighting back tears or avoiding church completely? Also, strangers that wish you a happy mother's day. This year I heard someone tell a cashier "Happy Mothers Day". The cashier responded, "OK, if it were applicable", to which the stranger responded with the most annoying perkiness "Oh, it is!!"...hello, clueless and selfish, the woman was trying to tell you something!!

 

[Blue12]

Hi, love this thread, im so with you ladies, here's another: "erm... I don't really know how to tell you this.. I'm really sorry... don't get upset but your brother, who is younger, not in a stable relationship etc etc.. is pregnant again by accident!!!!" "Why can't you be happy and put things in perpective... there are people dying every day and you are upset about something so small!" "Ring your brother because he's worried that you are upset!" ARRRRRAHHHHHHH! Quoting mother BTW who has been so supportive but can't say the right things!

I am with you on this one. My brother in a very new relationship had a baby and when I went to visit when the baby was 3 days old they said they want to try again right away. Like F*ing stab in the heart. They know my situation. Ugh... so now I know that the announcement is likely just around the corner.

 

[mrssunshine78]

this is a great thread makes you feel like you are not completely alone, nearly all of my good friends have children, the only ones who don't are the single ones, one of my friends complains about her 2 kids all the time (she knows we're trying), another falls preg just by having sex once in a month!!! she said (she didn't know we were trying at the time) i don't know why people use ov tests and stuff i can give u the exact date and time i got preg cos we'd only had sex once that month!!!!! once my god - i was stunned! the are also quite unhealthy. another friend said maybe we weren't having enough sex - how i didn't punch her in the face i do not know - i just glared at her and said i think every other day for the past 2 yrs is quite often enough!!


arrggggg i hate ttc

 

[pinklightbulb]

 

[chefamy1122]

I don't really have anything extra to add....just want to agree with everything that has already been said.

 

[caline]

Being told I am 'brave' for having IVF. Like, what else am I going to do?!?!
Love this thread, we should keep it going and add stuff as it crops up, which it does for me most days!

 

[wishicould]

My OH has 3 kids, I have none, blocked tubes n PCOS! Its not easy. I havn't told anyone, even my family about my situation because I can't bear to discuss it. I even tell ppl that I don't really like kids to stop them asking awkward questions:. Sometims it's just too hard even gettin up! I don't have anyone to talk too n I'm sick of being asked when I'm going to have a baby! Why do people make so may assumptions? x

 

[wishicould]

Being told I am 'brave' for having IVF. Like, what else am I going to do?!?!
Love this thread, we should keep it going and add stuff as it crops up, which it does for me most days!

I hope the IVF goes well and it works for you. I sincerely hope you get ur baby

 

[wishicould]

Just though of another one

Self Centered People on Mothers Day - The holiday itself is lovely, and I always celebrate my beautiful mom. However, I never go to church that Sunday - is anyone aware that some of us are fighting back tears or avoiding church completely? Also, strangers that wish you a happy mother's day. This year I heard someone tell a cashier "Happy Mothers Day". The cashier responded, "OK, if it were applicable", to which the stranger responded with the most annoying perkiness "Oh, it is!!"...hello, clueless and selfish, the woman was trying to tell you something!!

I hate mothers day, especially as previously I have ended up buying OH kids mum a present from them! I would love to b able to celebrate it

 

[rchurchlow]

Wow, it is so good to see it is not just me that feels all of the above!!! My friend tells me that she will try for a baby next month as she knows that she will obviously fall pregnant the first month (even though she has no children at the moment)....obviously!!! Silly fool!

Then you get those women who were on the TV documentary the other night '8 boys and wanting a girl' who come out with stupid comments like...and I quote,
'by having 4 boys and not having a girl I feel exactly like all of those women out there who cannot have children...I know exactly how they feel and I feel the same'....oh, of course you do!!!

Sorry guys it's just that people like that just wind me up, I was shouting at the TV and so was my O/H. We couldn't go to sleep that night as we were both so wound up and furious.....the joys of spending yrs and yrs TTC!

 

[rchurchlow]

oh and another classic....

OH to mother: 'We cannot have children naturally, been told by the hosp so the only
chance we have is to have IVF'
Mother: 'Oh lovely....you will have twins now then!'

Oh how their lives are so simple!