Scared to have a boy?

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - First Trimester' started by sunshine20, Nov 14, 2011.

  1. sunshine20

    sunshine20 Well-Known Member

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    I probably sound so dumb right now but I'm scared to have a boy. I've always wanted a little girl, I was born to be a mommy to a little girl. Obviously one has no choice in the gender of their child so we get what we get and don't complain (especially when trying for nearly a year and losing hope.) but I just can't shake the feeling that since I want a girl so bad, I'm going to have a boy and become hysterical. I know quite a few people with baby boys and I've never been comfortable with them as I am with girls. I have never been attracted to little boys clothes, toys, anything. I'm such a girly girl that it's always been bee line to the dresses and lace. Hubby brought home this little camo sweatshirt and I just burst out in tears because "I'm not putting my little girl in that" and he said "well, who says your having a girl!" and it just made it worse. I guess gender disappointment is a real thing and I feel like I should keep telling myself it's a boy so when I go for my scan in a few months I can cope better if it is? Idk. Please don't judge me. I have no one to talk to about this and I don't know I probably sound like a crazy person right now :/
     
  2. laylasmummy

    laylasmummy Well-Known Member

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    Trust me when the time comes you will love your baby either way!x
     
  3. bananaz

    bananaz Well-Known Member

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    The truth is that your fantasy is never going to perfectly match up with your child. Even if your baby is a girl, there's always a good chance dresses and lace may not be her thing - in fact, the camo Daddy bought might be more her style ;)

    In any case, the nice part about sexing scans being done at 16-20 weeks is that you still have another 5+ months to prepare yourself and fall in love with that little person, whoever they may be.
     
  4. NickyNack

    NickyNack Mum of 3 girls, soon 4!!

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    Hi, when I was pregnant last time I really wanted a boy, as we already had two girls, and I called my bump "him" until we got the news "he" was actually a "she"....I was sorely disappointed, but now I wouldn't be without her, she is my little princess. Again, we are hoping for a boy this time (as this is likely to be our last - if we had had a boy the last time, I doubt we would be back here so soon!) We have discussed it and I don't want to go to my 20 week scan, with the intent of finding out the sex of the baby. I don't want to embarrass myself by being devastated if they say its another girl, I know I should be happy that we have a healthy baby, but its not the fact its a girl, more that its not a boy, that will distress me, as its our "last chance", so what I am trying to say (not very well) is that I feel your pain, and you don't sound crazy to me (maybe cos we both are) :shrug:
     
  5. MrsBump1

    MrsBump1 Well-Known Member

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    You dont sound crazy AT ALL to me! Thats EXACTLY how i felt in my first pregnancy. OH didnt want to find out the sex before birth so i totally convinced myself i was having a boy so i wouldnt feel disappointment when the time came. As i got further into my pregnancy and could feel the baby move so much more i did bond to it so even tho my dream came true and i had my girl i think i would have coped if she was a he. Funny thing is i really dont care either way what sex the baby is! But if i had had a boy first time i would be out of my head wanting a girl!
     
  6. jenniferttc1

    jenniferttc1 mommy of 1 baking #2

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    I wanted a little girl, and honestly thought I would be so disappointed if it was a boy.Well he is def. a little boy, and I was not disappointed at all. Your feelings will def. change once you see how much he grows on ultrasounds, how healthy he is, and when you feel him move and kick all day.
     
  7. sunshine20

    sunshine20 Well-Known Member

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    Thank you everyone. I do think once I start getting bigger, feeling the baby move, going for more scans, I'll bond more. As of right now I feel no bond. This is my first baby so I'm a basket case and think something is wrong with me for not having this instant bond with our bean. I truly believe once I feel this baby kick, every worry of me not loving him/her will go out the window. It honestly hasn't even sunk in that I'm pregnant yet. We were looking at cribs and stuff yesterday and i felt like I was just shopping for someone else!
     
  8. babybrums

    babybrums Well-Known Member

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    After ttc for 6 years and two miscarriages, the gender is the least of my concern. As long as my little bean is healthy, it can be a boy or girl.
     
  9. JessPape

    JessPape Myself, Husband, DD

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    Little girls in camo rock! sorry I had too, my husband is a hunter and i find camo adorable! anyways, when the time comes, having a boy would be so accepted and ready for it, theses things wont even phase you hun!
     
  10. Canada8

    Canada8 3rd tri yah baby!

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    Boys rock! They love their mommy'stherebest! Even my step son is always on my side!
     
  11. Praying4O

    Praying4O Having a baby BOY!

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    it will be okay!!! lol. i want a girl, but i want a boy too...idk im just happy to be pregnant! Youll love your baby girl or boy!! :) i know my husband is going to be SUPER disappointed if we have a girl lol but once the baby is born he will be happy either way
     
  12. Mummyjohnson

    Mummyjohnson Well-Known Member

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    I feel a bit strange about having a boy. It's probably because I know what to do and how to act with girls. If hubby and me have a boy (he will be thrilled!) I guess I'll have to do things differently and I'm sure sure how that's work yet. We're finding out the sex early, which will give me lots of time to get used to the idea. You might want to do the same, so you feel more prepared in advance of the birth, if this is an issue. x x
     
  13. x_Kiirsty_x

    x_Kiirsty_x Well-Known Member

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    I wanted a little girl as my partner already has 2 boys from his previous relationship but we ended up having a boy. Okay so I was a little disapointed when we found out the sex but I wouldnt change him for anything!!! Now expecting #2 and I really hope its a girl as my partner don't want anymore kids so its like our last chance. :( x
     
  14. ladyV84

    ladyV84 Well-Known Member

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    Honestly boys are amazing! I simply do not know how I lived before my little man arrived ! I would love a girl this time but Ill be so happy with either - all healthy babies are a blessing! You will love your baby whatever, both are wonderful! Mummy son relationships are v special :)
     
  15. bubbywings

    bubbywings Well-Known Member

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    I have had two boys and I'm praying for a baby girl too. I know how you feel, hoping you get your wish. If not here's to a healthy baby!
     
  16. Steph32

    Steph32 Well-Known Member

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    As a mom of a boy, I can just say they are the sweetest things in the world... and they love their mommies so much. Moms and sons have a special bond.

    Before the child is here, it's always hard to imagine what it's going to be like. I know many women who desperately wanted a girl, saying "I don't know what to do with a boy!" (and vice versa) and all of them end up loving their child and would even imagine having it any other way.
     
  17. Marisa08

    Marisa08 3boys & having a GIRL!

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    My husband and i were just talking about this tonight at dinner I am a mom to three boys. Each time I wanted a girl. Now i cant imagine not having one of my boys! This time (of course I would love a girl) but I know that no matter I am going to love this baby with all my heart.
     
  18. liola

    liola Trying for our first

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    i feel like you, im so scared to have a girl i always wanted a little boy and dream of it. i feel so bad like i should be happy for anything. when i told people what sex i wanted they look at me like i'm some sort of nasty horrible person, or look at me like i'm going to neglect my baby if its a girl. one woman who asked me what i would like called me a cold hearted bitch. but i guess its normal to want one sex over the other. it doesn't mean that people will abuse or neglect their babies if they don't come out the way they wanted.
     
  19. FirstBean

    FirstBean Mummy to Ollie & pregnant

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    When you hold your baby you will be overjoyed if it is a boy or girl. I say as long as it is healthy you should be happy.
     
  20. liola

    liola Trying for our first

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    yes your right i just can't wait!:thumbup::flower::happydance:
     

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