So sorry for your loss
I have similar experiences, and consequently read a lot, it happens to everyone, very early miscarriages, called "chemical pregnancies". Some don't even get a visible line.
But for a few weeks, it feels real! Because it is real. A fertilized egg that just wasn't deemed good by the body, and stopped growing.
It's exhausting.. First two weeks of nausea and fatigue and pregnancy tests, then a BFP that slowly fades to BFN
.Not to mention the cervix cramping, and the second AF is the worst... The emotionl pain. The whole thing takes 2 months! With no results to show for all the work. The things women have to go through...
Maybe before women didn't even know it happened, just had "an off month". Only now with these tests do we know, and we also have to bear the knowledge.
How to continue? Take a pause. Slowly let go of the dream of this child. I keep them in my heart, even if i was just for a while. Gradually refocus on health, hobbies, friends or work. When you feel ready, try again. Nowadays, I don't test or dream big (count birthdays, choose names) until much after AF. This way, you feel the baby and how it ends, but at least you don't have to see the BFNs, or give up the dreams.
♡