Scared with new pregnancy but doin OK...

[daopdesign]

Hi Girls, not been on here much because if I'm honest the further I go in this pregnancy the more petrified I'm becoming. I'm so scared of having another loss I'm trying to put this pregnancy to the back of my mind.

I posted in 2nd tri asking for any success stories after a loss and not one person replied with hope!

Have my dating scan next Thurs and I'm not going anywhere near that scan room until they find heartbeat because I am not seeing that awful picture again I have stuck in my head of my little Owen.

I'm so scared and I don't know where else to rant my feelings. I know you just wanna say everything will be OK but I can't stop these feelings. Maybe I could just keep this thread open as somewhere I can come when I need to let things out, hope thats ok

Not had any morning sickness (was sick as a dog with 2 last pregnancies), no spotting and nothing to complain about. Have been using doppler on and off but trying not to much as the throught of the future of something bad happening plays on my mind and I don't want to get attached just yet.

I'll be exactly 16 weeks along (same as when I had my loss) on 28th Dec which is also my 30th birthday! Needless to say I won't be doing much celebrating xxx

 

[MummyStobe]

I know exactly how you feel hun. I'm just coming up to 7 weeks with this pregnancy and I'm having to take every day one step at a time. I hold my breath everytime I go to the bathroom in case I have started bleeding and the little bit of spotting that I've had hasn't helped my confidence one little bit.

I don't think any of us baking a rainbow baby will be able to relax until the day they are safe in our arms.

You should think about joining us in the ttc and pregnancy support thread. It gets a bit crazy at times but there is a great vibe in there and it has become a bit of a free for all with general chat. You might find it a helpful distraction.

Sending big hugs and lots of sticky to you. I hope you have some easier days ahead xx

 

[mhazzab]

I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I can't give you a positive story, as I am just ten weeks with my scan on the 19th, so a little bit behind you.

I was surprised when I got my BFP, to find myself pretty excited. I had thought I would be terrified. My plan was to try and stay a little bit detached, to protect myself incase something went wrong. I haven't exactly managed that, I love this little one so much and I don't know what I will do if something goes wrong.

Like you, I am getting more and more scared as time goes on. It won't be till March till I get to the same stage where I lost the girls, yes, I have worked it out already like you. It seems like so long away.
I'm waffling a bit here...what I am trying to say is, I can't say anything that will magic away the pain and fear for you, but just know, you are not alone, I feel exactly the same.
Always here for you if you want to talk xxx

 

[SabrinaKat]

I'm hitting third trimester today and only know that I have taken it one day at a time, and the future does seem so far away -- thankfully, all my scans have been good and I can feel the little one moving, so that helps. I'm an early pregnancy loss (7-8wks) and two possible chemicals, but am friends with some of the ladies here on mc/2nd trimester, and hopefully, you will get past the previous loss dates, but it's one day at a time....

sigh, and best wishes

 

[Hellylou]

I can only imagine how it is for all of you ladies carrying your rainbows at the moment. It's so sad to be robbed of that carefree excitement that was there last time.

I can only send massive hugs to all of you and say I am right there with you wishing you all the best for a healthy (if not exactly happy) pregnancy with a perfect outcome. I just want that for you all with every fibre of my being. I know the stress of all this will be worth it when you go home with those beautiful healthy babies at the end.

 

[KamIAm]

Hi Hon' ...

I can NOT give your any advice or a pretty rainbow story.... I have yet to concieve my lil rainbow... I can only imagine the fear and restlessness you , as well as all the others feel on a daily basis ... I'll be just as you....

I pray each and everyone of you deliver healthy, full term rainbows ...

We're always here for you....

 

[Nikki_d72]

I can't give you any advice either as I've not been able to conceive my rainbow yet but I can imagine. I just wanted to wish you a healthy 9 months too (well, 6 remaining) and I hope you can get past the dates OK. xxx

 

[Andypanda6570]

I am Hoping for a rainbow so very much, but just try to relax . I just know things will go well for you and the baby will be healthy and beautiful
We all are here for you day and night.. You might not know this but your very brave and I just know everything is going to be ok..XOXOXOX

 

[kayleigh89]

Hi Girls, not been on here much because if I'm honest the further I go in this pregnancy the more petrified I'm becoming. I'm so scared of having another loss I'm trying to put this pregnancy to the back of my mind.

I posted in 2nd tri asking for any success stories after a loss and not one person replied with hope!

Have my dating scan next Thurs and I'm not going anywhere near that scan room until they find heartbeat because I am not seeing that awful picture again I have stuck in my head of my little Owen.

I'm so scared and I don't know where else to rant my feelings. I know you just wanna say everything will be OK but I can't stop these feelings. Maybe I could just keep this thread open as somewhere I can come when I need to let things out, hope thats ok

Not had any morning sickness (was sick as a dog with 2 last pregnancies), no spotting and nothing to complain about. Have been using doppler on and off but trying not to much as the throught of the future of something bad happening plays on my mind and I don't want to get attached just yet.

I'll be exactly 16 weeks along (same as when I had my loss) on 28th Dec which is also my 30th birthday! Needless to say I won't be doing much celebrating xxx

Heya hunni.

You lost ur angel this year when we lost ours i think we said we would keep in contact and we gave eacother a lot of support.

Hope everything goes well for u hunni! xx

 

[jojo23]

awe hun im sorry you feel like this! i felt exactly like you at the start too but with every day that passes im feeling a little more optimistic, ill wont feel 100% ok until i get to 24 weeks (im 11 now) but i figure im almost half way there and so far so good. the more scans you have the better, i explained to my consultant last week that i was feeling extremely nervous and he assured me that the chances of anything happening again are so unbelieveably small that he wouldnt even consider me a risk! the more i talk to him and other doctors the more assured i am!

even so im still totally a wreck lol, every twinge has me freaked out, but we're all in this together hun and anytime you need anything just post and we'll all be here for you ....always xxxxxxxx

 

[daopdesign]

This is wonderful to have found you ladies especially those in the same boat with a new pregnancy. You really do have to tell yourself what will be will be because that's what I learned last time with never being given an answer why my loss happened.

Having a loss changes our outlook on pregnancy and I envy those woman who have not had to go through this ordeal as they seem to sail through their pregnancies. All I want more than anything in the world is to take home this baby. My fingers and toes are crossed for you all in the same boat as me and to you ladies trying for your rainbow miracle x I'll update when I have my scan on Thurs xxx

 

[Bride2b]

Good luck hun, it must be terrifying, but worrying wont probably help (easier said than done). I know when I get to the point of TTC & falling pregnant I will be terrified, and do feel fearful. I am told that you get closely monitored after a 2nd Tri loss, so I think its a case of keeping positive and taking each day as it comes, remember everyday is another little milestone & another day closer to making it to the end.

It sounds funny but a few days ago when I was in the 2nd Tri forums I probably wouldnt have responded as I wouldnt of known what to say....until you have been through it and had to experience that loss that we have people wouldnt. I am glad that there are ladies here who have conceived again and are able to offer you support. A friend of mine said that last year her friend lost her baby at 24 weeks, and last week she delivered a healthy baby girl. I also read that if you lose in the 2nd tri the chances of it happening again are sooooooo small.

Good luck hun, keep your chin up and look after yourself and that little one cooking in you tum xx

 

[jennijunni]

I want to say, everything will be alright, but we all unfortunatley know that is not always the case. But statistically speaking the odds are in your favor. I know how scared you are, and I know the feelings you are feeling. I will be thinking of you, and sending lots, and lots of positive thoughts, and prayers of comfort. We are part of a crappy club, some of us more than once over, and we have lost our innocence, but that does not mean that we cant enjoy what we have at this very moment, regardless of what tomorrow will bring. So enjoy today, because today you are pregnant with a tiny, sweet angel. Lots of hugs!

 

[Neko]

I conceived very quickly after my loss in January 2010, so quickly that my daughter was born at 38 weeks in December of 2010. I spent my entire pregnancy with her terrified about losing another baby. If she moved too little, I freaked out. If she moved too much I freaked out.

Ultrasounds were the worst for me. I learned that I has lost my baby during a routine OB visit. Everything had been fine. In fact I had felt the baby moving pretty early in the pregnancy 12/13ish weeks. The baby had been moving around quite a bit the night before, but I didn't think anything of it. That day the OB wasn't able to find a heartbeat with the doppler, so he went to the ultrasound machine. I'll never forget seeing a perfect baby on the screen with no heartbeat. Each and every ultrasound I secretly was freaking out that it would happen again.

The pregnancy was rough emotionally, although not difficult physically. Fortunately I gave birth to my rainbow baby and she's perfect.

https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v618/Culfindel/CCE12052011_00000.jpg
Last month all dressed up for Thanksgiving.

 

[daopdesign]

Neko, that's what terrifies me also is seeing a perfect baby back up just floating with no sign of life lik last time Have my proper dating scan tomorrow afternoon but before I go in I'm going to quickly pop into the other room where I know they have a heartbeat monitor and ask to be put on that first.

Last time I had a dating scan at 13 weeks a couple days later I started spotting brown blood and I wonder if that was from the tech pushing hard on my belly and causing some irratation. Usually and with my last pregnancy I could also feel a very minor bubble sensation in the belly and I'm sure I felt this a couple of weeks ago but now nothing the past week and I'm not even convinced I'm picking up the heartbeat! I'm prepared for the worse and if there is something wrong god damn you mother nature for not letting me lose this baby naturally earlier and making me go through a delivery again!

oh god I am worried, OK I will upate tomorrow thank you all - please cross ur fingers and toes for me and pray xxxxxx

 

[Andypanda6570]

I conceived very quickly after my loss in January 2010, so quickly that my daughter was born at 38 weeks in December of 2010. I spent my entire pregnancy with her terrified about losing another baby. If she moved too little, I freaked out. If she moved too much I freaked out.

Ultrasounds were the worst for me. I learned that I has lost my baby during a routine OB visit. Everything had been fine. In fact I had felt the baby moving pretty early in the pregnancy 12/13ish weeks. The baby had been moving around quite a bit the night before, but I didn't think anything of it. That day the OB wasn't able to find a heartbeat with the doppler, so he went to the ultrasound machine. I'll never forget seeing a perfect baby on the screen with no heartbeat. Each and every ultrasound I secretly was freaking out that it would happen again.

The pregnancy was rough emotionally, although not difficult physically. Fortunately I gave birth to my rainbow baby and she's perfect.


https://img.photobucket.com/albums/v618/Culfindel/CCE12052011_00000.jpg
Last month all dressed up for Thanksgiving.

So deeply sorry for your loss I am sooooo happy you got your gorgeous little rainbow baby

 

[Andypanda6570]

Neko, that's what terrifies me also is seeing a perfect baby back up just floating with no sign of life lik last time Have my proper dating scan tomorrow afternoon but before I go in I'm going to quickly pop into the other room where I know they have a heartbeat monitor and ask to be put on that first.

Last time I had a dating scan at 13 weeks a couple days later I started spotting brown blood and I wonder if that was from the tech pushing hard on my belly and causing some irratation. Usually and with my last pregnancy I could also feel a very minor bubble sensation in the belly and I'm sure I felt this a couple of weeks ago but now nothing the past week and I'm not even convinced I'm picking up the heartbeat! I'm prepared for the worse and if there is something wrong god damn you mother nature for not letting me lose this baby naturally earlier and making me go through a delivery again!

oh god I am worried, OK I will upate tomorrow thank you all - please cross ur fingers and toes for me and pray xxxxxx

Please try to stay positive. I know you must be terrified... I know I would be also but things will be ok . Just relax and try to think positive. I am sending so many prayers and love and kisses. Please update when you can. Thinking Of You XOXOXO

 

[Bride2b]

Neko, that's what terrifies me also is seeing a perfect baby back up just floating with no sign of life lik last time Have my proper dating scan tomorrow afternoon but before I go in I'm going to quickly pop into the other room where I know they have a heartbeat monitor and ask to be put on that first.

Last time I had a dating scan at 13 weeks a couple days later I started spotting brown blood and I wonder if that was from the tech pushing hard on my belly and causing some irratation. Usually and with my last pregnancy I could also feel a very minor bubble sensation in the belly and I'm sure I felt this a couple of weeks ago but now nothing the past week and I'm not even convinced I'm picking up the heartbeat! I'm prepared for the worse and if there is something wrong god damn you mother nature for not letting me lose this baby naturally earlier and making me go through a delivery again!

oh god I am worried, OK I will upate tomorrow thank you all - please cross ur fingers and toes for me and pray xxxxxx

Good luck hun got everything crossed for you that all is ok xxx

 

[Hellylou]

Neko, that's what terrifies me also is seeing a perfect baby back up just floating with no sign of life lik last time Have my proper dating scan tomorrow afternoon but before I go in I'm going to quickly pop into the other room where I know they have a heartbeat monitor and ask to be put on that first.

Last time I had a dating scan at 13 weeks a couple days later I started spotting brown blood and I wonder if that was from the tech pushing hard on my belly and causing some irratation. Usually and with my last pregnancy I could also feel a very minor bubble sensation in the belly and I'm sure I felt this a couple of weeks ago but now nothing the past week and I'm not even convinced I'm picking up the heartbeat! I'm prepared for the worse and if there is something wrong god damn you mother nature for not letting me lose this baby naturally earlier and making me go through a delivery again!

oh god I am worried, OK I will upate tomorrow thank you all - please cross ur fingers and toes for me and pray xxxxxx

Good luck for tomorrow.

 

[mhazzab]

Will be thinking of you tomorrow let us know how it goes xx