September Stars

[opticalillus5]

Aww becs.. I feel exactly the same. I wrote a thread in postnatal support about my PND, but deleted it after. It was basically saying the same thing; even after Emma I still felt like myself - I had a promising career, single parent with own house and money. But now I'm a housewife living off OH - I nearly cried when they asked my occupation to put on Izzy's birth certificate! I'm debating going back to the docs and asking for a review on my meds - some days it feels like they're not working enough.

Asher - Sound's like Sam's doing fab!

Emzy... Weren't you training to be a teacher like me before preg? If so, you could look in the phone book/internet for a specialist Education employment agency in your area - I've got an interview next tues in Leeds with Principal Resourcing. Even if you didn't qualify (I only did half my pgce), you still have teaching experience which makes you ideal for the role of a Cover Supervisor. You just turn up and watch the kids, making sure they do the work that has been left for them. Or, if you were ever registered with the GTC, you can change your registration with them from trainee teacher to 'instructor'. They are unqualified teachers who still plan and teach lessons, but get paid less. Only problem is, it tends to be 'as and when' work... but still something to consider.

 

[Fish&Chips]

Emzy, I did wonder if it could be eczema. He also keeps trying to scratch it and sometimes he makes himself bleed. I've been using Sudocream in the evenings and Oilitum in the mornings but it's not going. It goes through better and worse stages but never clears completely. The HV has told me to book an appointment with the doctor but they don't have any appointments free until March!! lol!! Am going to call on Tuesday incase they can fit me in on the day.

We can't really afford to go to a spa either but I'm going to be naughty and put it on my credit card as I really feel it's something I need to do with my dh. I need to take action and try and put some romance back in our marriage and give us a night off. I have found a hotel in Brigton, which isn't a spa, but I think dh will prefer to introduce Harry to the seaside! It is a family friendly hotel which provides a baby listening service, whatever that is!! I'm just going to take the monitor with me. So dh and I can have a nice meal together in the evening and then go for some nice walks along the seafront the next day. I'm so excited!! I'm not going to tell my dh what the plan is until we arrive!

x

Wow Genies those weights are amazing!! Harry (who obviously is not a twin!) was weighed today and is now 15lb 8oz which I'm so happy with as he was dropping down the lines quite a bit. He's now gone up a little bit so smack bang inbetween the 25th and 50th percentile which is where I think he should be as neither me nor my dh are big.

Optical, it sounds like there are a few of us feeling down. I don't have PND, I'm just going through a bad patch due to my dh's work commitments, so I really have to take my hat off to those feeling like this long term. I think that's why I'm so keen for the jewellery business to work as then I will feel in control again.

 

[Emzywemzy]

Optical yes I was doing my PGDE but for FE so not qualified to work in schools. Also I'm only really looking for evening and weekend stuff so Matt can have Holly. Nice idea though! My friend does supply work and earns a lot from it! I'll find something. Matt suggested earlier that he work part time and I work full time but I said no. He got the hump with me, but that's not what we agreed. When I left my course we agreed that I would look after Holly and work part time in the evenings and weekends and he would work full time as he is a qualified teacher, but now because he hates his job and may be facing redundancy he wants to work part time. But I just do not want to leave Holly to work full time at all and if he works full time he will bring in a lot more money than I can. It annoyed me a bit as its like he just changed the goalposts and expected me to go along with it! We had a row about it but sorted it in the end.

xx

 

[Emzywemzy]

Fishy it sounds like eczema to me, just like Holly's. OMG they didn't have any appointments til March!? lol

 

[Fish&Chips]

Thanks Emzy. So do you find Oilatum better than Sudacream?

 

[babythinkpink]

Fishy, that is really kind, I will think on something to do baby wise for him, he doesn't wear cuff links, or ties for tie pins or anything, I will think about something perhaps for fathers day, give me time to think, look and you time to do it! Thank you for the offer!
What have you tired on Harry's skin? Dose sound like little patches of eczema in which case a plain emollient cream should help, and you can use it in the bath as a soap if he gets worse after a bath, if it is eczema it should help, you can buy tubes over the counter if you want to try it and it wont cause any harm trying it, sometimes nappy creams have too much i them, one of mine was allergic to sudocream, it would blister the skin

Optical, I didn't do my pgce either, i know i could take my degree into secondary to train as a teacher, but i really wanted to do primary, although now i am not even sure i can, I was watching the thing on tv about retirement age increasing and so perhaps i have a few work years left in me yet worth training for once the children are i school!

Sorry i have to go, will try and finish the catch up later, huge , baby calling! xx

 

[MrsJ08]

I went to see the HV on Tues and after going around the houses regarding weaning and Scarlett's night feeds we agreed to try Scarlett with a bottle of formula before bed (she's exclusively BF at the mo). Anyway, we have tried the last two nights with a Bottle, Cup and Spoon and she absolutely refused despite being hungry. I'm at my wits end as I'm so sleep deprived, she is worse than when she was newborn waking every couple of hours and she's not even hungry half the time. I end up feeding her for a few mins and she falls back to sleep. Despite being good at it in the day, at night she just can't seem to settle herself. Did anyone else who BF for a few months have trouble putting their baby on a bottle? Any advice greatly appreciated - I don't want to post in baby club for fear of someone having a go at me for giving her some formula at night.

Emzy - sorry about the job but I believe things work out in the end so it obviously wasn't meant to be. Before we decided to TTC I went for tons of interviews with several stages and got down to the last two at least four times and even got verbally promised a job that didn't come through. It really knocked my confidence as I knew I could do the job standing on my head. Now I realise it just wasn't meant to be as we were supposed to stay in London for a while and have Scarlett. Also, thanks for the tip about baby neurofen. I've bought some today and will try it tonight if her teeth start playing up again.

F&C - Scarlett had the same thing and the HV said it was Eczema. I bought some Oilatum cream (it's on offer at Boots at the mo) and have been using it on her at every change and it has cleared up. I bought the bath oil too but found that didn't help at all. I'm topping and tailing her at the mo and only giving her a bath once a week as, having a bath (even with nothing in the water) seems to make it worse.

GG - great weights. Layla is catching up fast!

Optical and Becs-

BTP - I hope you treated yourself to something nice with the voucher.

My MIL has gone back to Crete. I'm glad she came over to meet Scarlett but our flat is just too small for someone to stay for more than a couple of days. Also, because she lives so far away I really don't know her all that well, in reality I've only met her about 10 times. By her own admission she doesn't have much of a maternal instinct, she couldn't be more different from my Mum and my Grandmother's so I find it hard to relate to her sometimes. I will give you an example - she told me that when her sister's first son was a baby he used to cry a lot so her sister used to put him in the garage and let him cry. That was until the neighbours reported her to social services. MIL told me this story as she thought her sister had done nothing wrong?!? I know that things have changed a lot and we are all a lot more touchy, feely now because we are more psychologically aware. But, even 40 years ago I don't think letting a baby cry on it's own in a garage would be considered normal? I think I was feeling a little sensitive and defensive when she was here too which added to the mix. My in-laws have been very good to us especially when we have had financial troubles and MIL is always over the top nice to me, but I can't help it something about her stops me feeling completely comfortable in her company. I think I might have offended her a little because she offered to have Scarlett while DH and I went out for a meal. I refused because I just don't feel ready yet, especially as she is still BF. It wasn't personal, I wouldn't leave her with anyone, the longest I've done is 2 hours while I was at the hairdressers and she was with DH. I think the only person I'd contemplate leaving her with at the mo is my own Mum and even then I'm fairly certain I wouldn't enjoy myself and would have to come home. Although she meant it as a nice gesture it ended up making me feel under pressure. There were lots of other things she said that got my back up a little but to be honest I'd be here all day if I listed them.

Right I better go as Little Miss will be awake soon

Hugs to all x

 

[Fish&Chips]

Thanks BTP, maybe I should stop Sudacream as a trial? I'll see if Oilatum does the job on it's own and then if that doesn't work will get some emollient cream. Thanks for the tip.

Mrs J, maybe I'm not using Oilatum regularly enough so I might try and put it on at every change too. We give Harry a bath every night as part of his bedtime routine so maybe that isn't helping. Thanks also for the tip!

I'm afraid I can't help with the bottle thing though as Harry still refuses. We are now trying him with a sippy cup and he's slowly getting the idea. Maybe you could give that a go? We are using a Tommy T one with a plastic spout.

 

[Fish&Chips]

Oh and MrsJ I'm the same about leaving Harry. My MIL has offered and I just can't do it and like you say he's also BF on demand and in the evenings he may want to cluster feed. I'm not sure how it would work until he's weaned.

Putting a crying baby in a garage is definitely not normal!!

 

[MrsJ08]

Thanks F&C - glad to know I'm not the only one as she made me feel like a was a psycho and that I should be taking more "care" of my relationship with DH. Cheeky cow - maybe he's the one who should be taking a bit more care of me! We've tried a sippy cup with a hard spout and a soft one with no joy so far. Yesterday she tried to throw the cup on the floor.

I've just been looking at Kara's fairies on Facebook. They are gorgeous - she is so clever!

x

 

[babythinkpink]

MrsJ, Just quickly as i have to cook tea!

I have never managed to wean from breast to bottle, i think after a certain length of time if they have exclusive breast they get to an age they know if they hold out they get there way, and the nipple seems to be quite different to work than a teat!!
I have gone from breast to beaker, but not til after 6 months old, my eldest would suck juice from a straw from 4 months old but not milk from a bottle.
My last dd flatly refused anything that wasn't breast milk, and i had to try as she was intollorant to milk, she would only take juice.
Sorry i can't help much, if nights are a problem, all i can suggest is leaving a feed late so she has quite a good fill of both just before bed and she is really pretty hungry, this may fill her up to a glut and she may sleep better, even though she may work herself up a bit if she is hungry, just see how she is and if you can hold off a feed do anything to distract her, bath, play, just chatting to her?
Not sure why the night feed is being weaned, for a bottle but it is much easier to drop or change a day feed to a bottle to get her used to it, night feeds are not good to try changes first!
Good luck, sorry if i have not understood very well and not really helped!

 

[lilbumpblue]

iv been trying to read the new posts for ages so forgotten things now! Fishy im glad im not the only one feeling like oh is basically like having a 2nd child to base for lol! Enjoy your weekend away!

Well im so angry...took James to be weighed and he has lost 1oz but they are not worried yet! But i mentioned the white on his tongue she had a look and straight away said he has thrush so no bloody wonder he has struggled to feed for 4 weeks and also if his mouth is dry in the night it will be sore so i bet that is why he is waking up! X

 

[Cafferine]

MrsJ does she have a dummy? Reuben wakes a couple of times and I just reach over and pop a dummy in his mouth *lazy mum*

I know what you mean about not feeling yourself, it's like I have no motivation to do anything these days! No motivation to get dressed, no motivation to clean, everytime I clean its messy again in an hour, no motivation to do anything!! If I put Reuben in his bumbo or his walker he just looks at me and shouts untill I pick him back up, If I put him in his moses basket he wakes up 5/10 minutes later screaming. I feel sofa bound with a baby on my lap! I actually feel myself getting angry that I can't put him down, I have to remind myself that he is just a baby and it makes me feel so upset with myself that I am getting angry about something which he doesn't understand about because he is so little.

It probably didn't help that yesterday when I DID get up and clean and cleaned all the living room and then Mr Cafferine came home I made dinner, gave him his dinner and sat down with mine on the other sofa as there was stuff on the one he was sitting and he said 'Come sit next to me' and threw all the stuff on the sofa all over the floor! FFS! I said 'DON'T CHUCK IT ALL OVER THE FLOOR FOR GOD SAKE!' then he just went in a sulk because I told him off and when I said why would you come into a clean living room and chuck everything on the floor? He said oh had you cleaned? I hadn't noticed, sorry....... What is the point? Really?

Anyway rant over! I start uni in March, it will be nice to have some me time then but also reallyhard in the evenings.

 

[Fish&Chips]

LBB, that would make so much sense! More little thing. Hopefully you will be able to get it sorted and start getting some sleep.

Cafferine, grrr! That would have made me mad too. The nearest thing to that I have had is the other week I gave the house a good tidy and he asked if I people round during the day. Cheeky monkey!

x

 

[lilbumpblue]

Fishy even the dog know if we are expecting people around cos we have a major mad dash cleaning sesh!! haha...its usually if Chris' stepmum is coming!!!! haha x

 

[becs0375]

LBB, no wonder little man has been off his food!! Poor little man xx

Optical, I saw your erased post in post natal, you should of kept it. Its often better when you see it written down xxx You have me on fb if you ever want to chat x

I had a lovely morning at baby signing, it was really busy with lots of newbies and some little babies, Hope is not one of the youngest anymore!! There was a lady there with twin girls, they are gorgeous!!!! Its was just so nice to have adult conversation other than my family and Ian!
Hope is fast asleep, Ian is doing the ironing and I am relaxing with a brew and some toblerone!! I feel flippin exhausted. I am off to see my friend tomorrow who moved to Norfolk before Christmas, her husband is RAF, we are off to see her for lunch, she hasn't seen Hope since she was 5 days old!! I love Kate, she is one of my friends that I don't see or hear from that often but you know she is always there when you need her, you never feel guilty about not keeping in regular contact but each of us knows we only have to pick up the phone, its lovely! She only lives about 25 miles away!!
My hands are so dry and chapped, they are actually splitting, I am using that much cream!!

 

[Jellycat]

Lbb hope James is better soon xx

F&C hope you enjoy the weekend sounds a great idea. Also my DH says similar things about my cleaning too lol

Opti didn't realise you were struggling at the moment , big hugs xx

Saw my mum today she was upset over DH losing his job, it would just help nit hearing it on the news every couple of hours. Anyway kind of got my head round it all now and as if Monday DH and I are going to plan what we need to do. My sister has also offered to look after JJ two days a week if go back to work to help.

Tried JJ on porridge today he wasn't too bothered, he definatly prefered his banana last week. Going to mix the two together next time and hopefully he'll be lapping it up!

Mrs j hope you find a solution soon with the feeding, sorry I can't offer any advice xx

 

[Asher]

Evening all, am gonna make it a quick one as I'm knackered!!

Did a pregnancy test before..... negative! I've been so tired lately, and had pretty much a constant on and off cold for ages. Felt really shitty today, and hormonal. DH said I looked like I have what he calls the "pregnancy flu!" so I did the test. I was probably 80%/20% happy/sad in that order. DH said he was too! Ah well.

MrsJ, I feel your pain. I've been there done that, with Jack. He was a constant feeder at night, it was about the only thing that would settle him. Like Fishy and BTP, he also wouldn't take a bottle. He wouldn't take any milk, including mine, from either cup or bottle. What do you do with regards to sleeping? We did have Jack in his own room, as he was so noisy when he was actually asleep. He wouldn't go to sleep on his own, and then would normally be awake between midnight and 1am. The only way any of us would get any sleep would be for me to bring him into bed with us and feed him laying down. Eventually he would go off to sleep. But he would generally feed on and off all night, but I could at least get some sleep too. We were criticised for bringing him into bed for so long, but if it works and you can sleep, it's so worth it!!

Jayne, poor little James with his thrush! I hope that's had something to do with him being up in the night and it all improves with his treatment! Have you got it too? When Archie had it, my nipples were super sore, and I needed to be treated too. Big hugs. xx

Love your idea for getting away with DH, Fishy. Sounds just what the Dr ordered! x

Genies, fab weights for the girlies! x

Becs, sounds as though you've had a better day today. Am really glad. x

Cafferine, grrrr!!! I wish these other halves would give us some appreciation! We deserve it!

Glad you had a good chat and think about the job situation Jelly, that's a lovely offer from your sister. x

My DH keeps going on about sexy undies. I don't own any these days. Or if I do, it's ancient. When I was in Morrisons before, I noticed they are selling sexy undies and grip top stockings and the like, I mentioned it to him and he asked why had I not bought any. I told him that they're in there for Valentine's Day, and there is no way I'm buying. If he wants sexy stuff, he can buy it himself. In the old days he would think nothing of ordering something sexy for me, so I'm determined to not let him get lazy. Only thing is, I don't really feel like wearing anything sexy!!! Can we start a campaign to make jogging pants hot hot hot!??!! x

 

[becs0375]

Claire, I have to say I really don't feel sexy. Ian and I have only had sex 3 times since we have had Hope. I just don't want it, I feel awful but I just can't bring myself round to it. I think its partly to do with my PND and partly due to my traumatic birth. I used to have such a high sex drive but now its non existant. I just feel so bad but I can't bear him touching me or getting jiggy!!!! Sorry that turned into a ramble!!

 

[lilbumpblue]

thanks ladies x

Yes Claire iv had to have cream too...to be honest iv not really been sore a bit tender maybe and a few teeny sharp stabs but thats it...i think i may have it in my mouth thou my tongue is a tad sore tonight and come to think of it it has been on n off for a few weeks and been very dry n tender in the night...it must be because James is so kissable! xx