septembryos baby area (09 babies)

[firegal]

I see him every weekend, but now it looks like that is getting too expensive. I'm at college until June 24th, so even that is getting to me because I can't keep my absence straight.

He just said he'd rather just go to work, earn the money and spend it how he wants. Not be running around after me. If he's on the edge now, what's he going to be like when the baby is born?

One minute he's saying he just wants to be settled with me and the baby, the next he's saying he wants to do what he wants.

I don't know what to do

This sounds like a typical bloke response... he's not unhappy with you, he's just stressed with the situation. But at the end of the day, he needs to accept that this is the way things are and he needs to be responsible enough to help you both get through it

 

[star-dust]

I see him every weekend, but now it looks like that is getting too expensive. I'm at college until June 24th, so even that is getting to me because I can't keep my absence straight.

He just said he'd rather just go to work, earn the money and spend it how he wants. Not be running around after me. If he's on the edge now, what's he going to be like when the baby is born?

One minute he's saying he just wants to be settled with me and the baby, the next he's saying he wants to do what he wants.

I don't know what to do

This sounds like a typical bloke response... he's not unhappy with you, he's just stressed with the situation. But at the end of the day, he needs to accept that this is the way things are and he needs to be responsible enough to help you both get through it

what she said!

 

[NotSoWorried]

I just said to him 'I doubt you're going to tell your unborn child to f*ck it' and he hasn't replied, I text him again saying 'Or are u?' And again no reply.

I can't do this without him.

I've never been so scared!

 

[star-dust]

I just said to him 'I doubt you're going to tell your unborn child to f*ck it' and he hasn't replied, I text him again saying 'Or are u?' And again no reply.

I can't do this without him.

I've never been so scared!

Dont mean to be rude but thats prob not the best thin to do or say!!! you say you dont want to do this without him, but things like that may make him see it differently!

Either call him, or text and say sorry dont mean it like that, hormones are all over the place, Im so scared and struggling to see a way through this, all I want is to be with you and our baby, please talk to me

or something!

**shuts up before she gets told off

 

[firegal]

I just said to him 'I doubt you're going to tell your unborn child to f*ck it' and he hasn't replied, I text him again saying 'Or are u?' And again no reply.

I can't do this without him.

I've never been so scared!

I think you need to say those last two sentences to him.... he needs to realise this isn't all about him, it's about the 3 of you making it as a family.

 

[NotSoWorried]

He isn't answering my calls or texts.

 

[star-dust]

He isn't answering my calls or texts.

Ok maybe give him some time, he could be busy or something?

remeber rant and rave here as much as you need

 

[firegal]

Ok... don't panic. Give him some time to calm down. He wouldn't be the first man to just shut down and stop having contact when things get tough. I'd suggest you leave it for at least an hour or so and then contact him later, but when you do contact him make sure you start by telling him that you just want to make things work (or something like that) rather than by telling him off.

 

[star-dust]

have I read somewere your movin to oxfordshire?

 

[firegal]

He isn't answering my calls or texts.

Ok maybe give him some time, he could be busy or something?

remeber rant and rave here as much as you need

Absolutely! He could have a genuine reason for not answering. In the meantime we're here for to vent as much as you want

 

[NotSoWorried]

have I read somewere your movin to oxfordshire?

Yeah, I am.

If he hasn't walked.

 

[star-dust]

have I read somewere your movin to oxfordshire?

Yeah, I am.

If he hasn't walked.

have you any friends there yet?

and I know its hard but think positive

 

[NotSoWorried]

Nope. I have to give up everything for him, up here. And then he acts like this, I haven't once broken down because of it. I'm going through 10x more than he ever will. Yet he's the one who can do the runner, when I can't even run anymore!

 

[babytots]

thanks star-dust can't wait to start doing things to my pics

notsoworried- sorry to hear that hunni. like star-dust said can you not move in with him before the baby arrives? it must be so hard for you hunni being so far away from him.hope you manage to sort something out hunni.

my head is hurting so much! managed to get my youngest to sleep all morning she has been grumpy because she had a late night so glad i got a bit of peace for a while.want to go to sleep myself but i know my head will prob hurt even more. oh and the sickness is starting to kick in now. not looking forward to the boffathon especially as i have had coca cola which is yucky to bring back up. oh i wish df wasnt at work. x

 

[firegal]

Sometimes men really need things spelt out to them hun... if you haven't broken down he's probably thinking that he's struggling with the travelling while you're sitting there unaffected. Not wanting to generalise (but I'm going to!), but men can REALLY be of the "it's all about me" mindset, and it takes them a long while to realise that other people are struggling too.

Really try not to panic. I know he's made some scary noises but the chances of him just leaving you are pretty slim. If he's a half decent guy then if you, calmly but firmly, make him see how this is affecting you and how important your support is to both you and the baby then I'm sure things will be okay. He's basically throwing his toys out of the pram at the moment, but that doesn't mean it can't be worked through. You just need a bit of patience hun, and really try to stay calm and focused. Take lots of deep breaths, it actually helps!

 

[NotSoWorried]

He's finally replied!

'Your the two most important people in the world to me, ofc i'll never say that but it doesn't stop me feeling it sometimes. I just want to be with you both everyday'

How can he be so harsh and then so kind? I'm pretty sure I'm the one with the hormones going round like a rollercoaster, not him.

 

[NotSoWorried]

Sometimes men really need things spelt out to them hun... if you haven't broken down he's probably thinking that he's struggling with the travelling while you're sitting there unaffected. Not wanting to generalise (but I'm going to!), but men can REALLY be of the "it's all about me" mindset, and it takes them a long while to realise that other people are struggling too.

Really try not to panic. I know he's made some scary noises but the chances of him just leaving you are pretty slim. If he's a half decent guy then if you, calmly but firmly, make him see how this is affecting you and how important your support is to both you and the baby then I'm sure things will be okay. He's basically throwing his toys out of the pram at the moment, but that doesn't mean it can't be worked through. You just need a bit of patience hun, and really try to stay calm and focused. Take lots of deep breaths, it actually helps!

Thankyou.

At 18, I feel like I'm going to be raising two babies.

 

[firegal]

He's finally replied!

'Your the two most important people in the world to me, ofc i'll never say that but it doesn't stop me feeling it sometimes. I just want to be with you both everyday'

How can he be so harsh and then so kind? I'm pretty sure I'm the one with the hormones going round like a rollercoaster, not him.

Phew! He obviously loves you hun. He might not have the hormones to justify the previous text, but this is a stressful time for him too. I still think you need to make it really clear to him how you're feeling - he needs to start controlling what he says, and instead of threatening to leave he needs to work with you to get through the tough times xx

 

[firegal]

Thankyou.

At 18, I feel like I'm going to be raising two babies.

Oh hun, I'm nearly 32, my man is nearly 35, but there are plenty of times when I feel like that too!

 

[NotSoWorried]

He's finally replied!

'Your the two most important people in the world to me, ofc i'll never say that but it doesn't stop me feeling it sometimes. I just want to be with you both everyday'

How can he be so harsh and then so kind? I'm pretty sure I'm the one with the hormones going round like a rollercoaster, not him.

Phew! He obviously loves you hun. He might not have the hormones to justify the previous text, but this is a stressful time for him too. I still think you need to make it really clear to him how you're feeling - he needs to start controlling what he says, and instead of threatening to leave he needs to work with you to get through the tough times xx

I doubt it'd be clear to him. He's a fairly controlling OH at the best of times.

He's all appoligetic now and driving to mine straight from work.

I just want to make everything work out.

MEN!!

Anyway, thankyou everyone for supporting and talking to me.

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