Sleep Sense Support Group!

[jacs]

ooh good luck! Let us know how it goes

 

[lindak]

Hi Ladies, Havent been on in a while ! So Zac has been going to bed alone since 7 weeks in his own room , the only problem is that he is still waking at lots of time during the night . He is on 3 meals a day at the moment. I have not read all posts but did you all buy the book to learn the principles ?

 

[Elski]

Thanks ladies

Yep it went on for the best part of 3hrs each night and in the end, I fed her to sleep each time. I know it says not to but I was at my wits end and didn't know what else to do. I mean, I was expecting it to be hard but not this hard!

I haven't tried PU/PD but I will give it a go, I'm not sure why I haven't yet tried it to be honest! I'll read the newborn section (I skipped all the sections that weren't relevant to me ) I'll also give the 'taking a step back' method a go too and see if that makes a difference. OH is back to work tomorrow so we'll try again properly next fri. In the meantime I'll email Dana and also test the water with the PU/PD....

I hope you all have successful nights and thanks again for the suuport/advice! I'll report back tomorrow

 

[Seraphim]

Hey all

Just wondering if any of you have lil front sleepers and how well self settling has gone?

 

[TennisGal]

Laydeeeeeeeeeeeeeez!

Did you all have good Easter hols? I've eaten too much chocolate!

Aimee-Lou, welcome!! Let us know how it goes tonight...I'll read your thread shortly. Sounds like you have some good sleeping patterns already, so I bet you'll get some good success. This thread is v.supportive and so much help - any questions, there is always someone around!

Elski what a horrid night DD has never responded to PU/PD...and when she is v.tired, she likes to just know we are there, rather than us doing anything. Almost like, errr, SHHH Mummy, I'm trying to SLEEP. Singing works, in a low, quiet voice, when she's having some trouble settling? I'd also email Dana, and see what she has to say. Rest assured, she doesn't hate you - but I'd ask D to get some advice...it must be horrid for you. We started when DD was about five months, I think our cue was more concern that one of us would have an accident, as DD was sleeping on us.

MS - GREAT news on the naps!!

Hive Child - great night, you must be pleased!

Linda - I bought the book...is the waking a new thing? Could it be a growth spurt?

Seraphim - DD is a back-sleeper. Her thumb has been great help for her self-settling.

Jacs, Polaris - how's you? Any news? Good naps?

Wellllllll, DD has had an earlier bedtime tonight - she's so tired after a really busy day/weekend. She's been very excited at her first real interaction with one of the cats...she stroked him (well, half grabbed/half patted) and he purred and she GRINNED. Was so cute. I was dithering around with a wipe!

On an aside, there is one v.annoying person in the village who keeps abbreviating DDs name to something we DON'T call her. Why?! Really bugs me! I know it's very petty, but it really does bug! lol.

 

[TennisGal]

oooh, forgot to say...DD had a mixture of weaning today. Some puree and some bits of veggies. She went for puree first, and then chomped on the sticks. DH decided to give her a spoon fully loaded, and it catapulted into his hair, her hair and the floor, lol. How?!?! Such a small spoon, so much mush everywhere!

 

[polaris]

Hi Lindak and Seraphim

Lindak - the 'book' is available electronically from the sleepsense website - to be honest the principles are pretty similar to most of the other sleep books (I know cos I've read most of them, LOL) - but I would still really recommend the sleepsense programme because I found it was very clear about exactly what you should do and includes a very practical step-by-step guide. If you buy the programme, you get an electronic copy of the book, various planning and recording sheets, and access to online videos explaining the programme.

Seraphim - Thomas isn't a tummy sleeper but I wouldn't think that it should really make too much difference? What way does Hazel go to sleep at the moment? They do struggle at first to figure out how to self-settle but it is such an amazing skill to teach them - Thomas is so happy to go into his cot at bedtime now and will just chat away to his blankie for ten or fifteen minutes before dropping off to sleep. Even for naps, he usually goes down with no crying recently. It is lovely and makes life so much easier.

 

[aimee-lou]

Hmm well, kind of mixed.

We tried to get off to sleep without the dummy, and we were inconsolable. I decided to try a bit of PUPDCD as I knew he would kick up a fuss but wanted to stay in control, but in the end he got so worked up, I went into the other room to collect a new muslin and heard choking. He was being sick and couldn't turn over so was in a real panic. I sat him up slapped his back and picked him up. He promptly proceeded to vomit all over my chest (at least it wasn't all over the bed!).

At this point I was distraught and so was Earl. I managed to get him calm and cleaned up without too much bother. I then switched the monitor on (I had been upstairs the whole time) and asked hubby to bring me up a dummy. I put him to bed, popped him down again as I normally would and literally 30 seconds his eyes were shut and he was gone. He's not made a peep since either.

Now, what do we take from this. Sleep training without his dummy is just too much for him to cope with this soon, and that any amount of crying ends up with me just in my bra - bonus being we got some skin to skin to calm him down.

I had a plan to try what I did above. If it didn't work (never expected it to fail quite so miserably) then I would try giving him some water tonight. I had cut him off cold turkey from his night feed so maybe he was just missing that interaction? Hubby also had a thought that maybe he wasn't using up enough energy during the day. We go for a walk every day, and try to do as many activities as we can, but it's a bit same old same old. He may be on to something but for now, I'll be making up a couple of water bottles tonight lol.

Oh well.....back to the old drawing board. Thing is, it's not like his sleeping has been horrific. We just need to try to get us back on the straight and narrow.

Thanks for the support everyone. Hubby has gone to the chippy for 'us tea' lol. Need the comfort food as I feel like a horrible mummy.

Hope your nights go better.

 

[polaris]

oooh, forgot to say...DD had a mixture of weaning today. Some puree and some bits of veggies. She went for puree first, and then chomped on the sticks. DH decided to give her a spoon fully loaded, and it catapulted into his hair, her hair and the floor, lol. How?!?! Such a small spoon, so much mush everywhere!

ooh it sounds so exciting - I can't wait to start weaning!

We have had a pretty quiet day here - naps are going pretty well - Thomas seems very sleepy at the moment and is struggling to stay awake for the two hour stretches he was doing last week - as a result he seems to have gone back to four naps a day for the moment with a late nap at 5ish and bed at about 7.15. No crying for any of the four naps today, YAY!!! I think having the chill-out time before each nap is really working for us as he seems to start winding down as soon as the music goes on now and will snuggle into me and start chewing my cardigan, so sweet.

 

[polaris]

Hmm well, kind of mixed.

We tried to get off to sleep without the dummy, and we were inconsolable. I decided to try a bit of PUPDCD as I knew he would kick up a fuss but wanted to stay in control, but in the end he got so worked up, I went into the other room to collect a new muslin and heard choking. He was being sick and couldn't turn over so was in a real panic. I sat him up slapped his back and picked him up. He promptly proceeded to vomit all over my chest (at least it wasn't all over the bed!).

At this point I was distraught and so was Earl. I managed to get him calm and cleaned up without too much bother. I then switched the monitor on (I had been upstairs the whole time) and asked hubby to bring me up a dummy. I put him to bed, popped him down again as I normally would and literally 30 seconds his eyes were shut and he was gone. He's not made a peep since either.

Now, what do we take from this. Sleep training without his dummy is just too much for him to cope with this soon, and that any amount of crying ends up with me just in my bra - bonus being we got some skin to skin to calm him down.

I had a plan to try what I did above. If it didn't work (never expected it to fail quite so miserably) then I would try giving him some water tonight. I had cut him off cold turkey from his night feed so maybe he was just missing that interaction? Hubby also had a thought that maybe he wasn't using up enough energy during the day. We go for a walk every day, and try to do as many activities as we can, but it's a bit same old same old. He may be on to something but for now, I'll be making up a couple of water bottles tonight lol.

Oh well.....back to the old drawing board. Thing is, it's not like his sleeping has been horrific. We just need to try to get us back on the straight and narrow.

Thanks for the support everyone. Hubby has gone to the chippy for 'us tea' lol. Need the comfort food as I feel like a horrible mummy.

Hope your nights go better.

Oh no that sounds horrible. That would be very hard to cope with and I don't blame you going back to the dummy after him getting sick all over you, I would have been so upset too. Hope the water is successful for you - like you say he is a very good sleeper on the whole from early on so hopefully things will get back on track. I'm so glad now that Thomas didn't take a dummy as I think I would have found it very hard to take it off him if I saw him get so much comfort from it. But then if i was up X times a night putting it back in I would not be happy about that either. Anyway, stick around this thread and let us know how things go, it's really useful to hear what works/doesn't work for other people even if it's not 'pure' sleepsense.

 

[Seraphim]

Polaris... as you know H has had troubles with wind. The good news being she is finally off the colief We've never been able to put her down and leave her to fuss too much because there's always a burp stuck in there. Whenever I've tried to leave her, she's been sick. Not through stress or crying, just wriggling and the fact she's on her tummy.

Now she's stronger than ever with her arms and neck, I'm not sure how to approach putting her down awake on her front.

I'm not sure if it's time to ask that she sleep on her back and deal with that aswell/before going down awake

She will sometimes settle if i rub/pat her back/bum... but I haven't done too much of this because I've wondered is it too much going on to get into on a regular basis. It tends to come into play if she is disturbed with a burp/fart but I hear her shift it herself, so I rub/pat her, slowing down til shes off.

Normally we sit down sleepy with her sat upright on my chest, she puts her head on my shoulder and often I pat her bum or something. Then I put her tummy down on my lap, straighten out her grobag, be sure she's sleepy and pop her in the cot. She's not out cold, does a few head turns and foot shuffles and maybe a bit of finger sucking (she still hasn't taken to her thumb! ) and she's off.

Naps have really improved, she's ready and willing for naps every couple of wake hours - only problem still being the burps.

 

[TennisGal]

Aimee-Lou sounds horrible I think SS goes out of the window after a certain point...so don't worry.

 

[TennisGal]

Seraphim, hard one...how about trying back sleeping with the naps first? See how her tummy fares?

 

[TennisGal]

P - HOW cute with the cardie!! Awwwww!

 

[lindak]

Ok ladies Im in !!!!!!!! Just bought the book online and have had a quick read through it.

So the situation with Zac is ... He is great at going down ( took us about a week to get him into that routine) and has been since 7 weeks he goes to bed at 7 and sleeps till maybe 1 or 2 and then wakes again at 4 and sometimes at 6 ? So as you can see its not getting him asleep its getting him to get himself back asleep in the middle of the night. He naps great during the day aswell . So tonight is the night , oh is off for a week and I am back in work tommorrow !! So at least he can go into him , because when he sees me and realises Im not giving him booby he goes mad ! We usually give a soother which is going to have to stop aswell !

So what did you ladies exactly do when your lo woke during the night ?

Fingers crossed for me ladies , I really want this to work as like the rest of you I HaVE OFFICIALLY HAD ENOUGH !!!!!!!!!

 

[Seraphim]

Do many of your OHs put LO to bed at all?
We've tried twice and H got seriously upset.
Then yesterday hubby took her into the bedroom (to wait for me getting out of the bath) ready for her lunchtime nap, and she got very upset. When I went in there were tears and pouts and looks of 'i need you mummy' - it's very odd, she LOVES her daddy, they have lots of time together. We've only just noticed because I fell into being the one to always put her down

 

[aimee-lou]

Seraphim - hubby is banned from doing anything with Earl sleep wise. Hubby is just a big playmate to Earl and consequently all he has to do is show his face in the nursery and Earl to see him and that's it....wide eyes, smiles, arms flapping 'Let's play' type behaviour lol. It's muchly annoying lol. He can get him off for naps during the daytime, but going sdown on an evening or dreamfeeds are a no-no. He never wakes when Earl does so I don't know how that would go down.

I've got my bottles of water ready....2 bottles of 2oz a piece. hoping one will be enough, but thought I'd best be prepared lol.

Thanks for the reassurance ladies. I really did feel like such a bad Mummy. Came downstairs to hubby in floods of tears that I'd put him through such trauma. I know he'll be fine (not had a peep out of him since 7.50 when I put him down ) Dream feed coming up which mostly goes without a hitch, as long as he doesn't realise that hubby is around lol. Then we'll have to see.

 

[jacs]

We share everything now - we did get into bad habits with this and Evan would only sleep if I carried him.
Now, if DH puts him to bed, I will do the night feed, then we swap the next night. That way LO is just as used to both of us. Have you tried settling her together a couple of times, then you're both doing exactly the same thing?

lindak - if you think a night waking isn't needed (clean bum, doesn't need a feed etc), then you would just do the same thing you do to get them to sleep at bed/nap time. We haven't had a single one since we started, but Evan does get up very early at times, so I leave him for a few minutes then gently shush him if need be. So far he's never gone back to sleep again in the morning, I think I need to accept that he is not going to let me lie in!
Good luck!!

 

[CatStorey]

Evening ladies Hope you all had a good easter!!

Back from our night away (went to Kent for the night as DH works for a hotel chain and can get staff rate Took Chloe to a farm today, she loooooved it !)
Chloe woke up every hour through the night so am knackered now though. I think it was the rubbish travel cot they provided, it was rock hard . She seems fine tonight so far so fingers crossed we haven't messed up our new routine.

Polaris - Good news on the naps Sounds fantastic. I'm not looking forward to tackling naps!

TG - Weaning is sounding so much fun! Messy.......but fun!! Can't wait for tomorrow as hubby is off so we are going to give Chloe her 1st taste of baby rice

Elski - Sorry things aren't going well I really hope things improve for you.

Lindak - When Chloe wakes in the night I leave her if its just groaning. 9 time out of 10 she will go back to sleep herself. At the beginning of the program when she would cry I would wait 3 mins then go into the room and take up my spot on the chair and sit it out. Chloe cried for I think 60 mins the 1st night and slightly less the next. Now she doesn't cry at all. And I think it was so bad as I went cold turkey on the dummy and night feed

Aimee - Welcome Big So sorry you had a bad night. Poor you and Earl. Him being sick must have been awful. I really hope the rest of your night goes better x
Chloe has a dummy and I took it away at night only, she still has it loads on the day. She can still self settle without it and puts herself back to sleep when she wakes in the night. I gave her a blankie which she sucks and then she uses her thumb too. It did take about 3 nights to get the hang of the thumb, but now she has it well sorted. We also had the same problem with Chloe pulling it out but then wanting it back......was sooooo annoying!
I also stopped her night feed. I went cold turkey and didn't offer water. She did cry for the first 2 nights but she is fine now. Cos she woke so much I had no idea if it was out of hunger or not so I just had to stop feeding her and see what happened. Thankfully she took it fine and just takes alot more during the day instead to make up for it.
Before we started SS Chloe was waking every hour, then every 15 mins, she never ever slept through. But by night 5 (I think, kinda lost count) she was sleeping through .
Good luck for the rest of your night

Sorry to everyone else I have missed. I can't keep up with everyone but once I can open my eyes and focus propelly again (so so tired!) I will catch up with you all!

Night and sending lots of sleepy dust to our lo's

 

[hivechild]

Well I gave up this afternoon on getting him down in his crib. he was so overtired and would start wailing as soon as I lay him down. If I got him calm when I picked him up he'd start getting dozy right away on my shoulder.

His 'naps' all day were 45 min, 20 min, a couple times at 5 min and one that was 10 min. I figured if we had any chance of success tonight he was going to need a good sleep this afternoon so I took him to bed with me for a cuddle/nurse and he's been asleep here now for over 3 hours.

I feel crappy about it because I feel like I'm just confusing things for him, but then I feel crappy seeing him so tired and distressed.

Please wish me luck tonight and the strength to see this through.