Sleep Sense Support Group!

[TennisGal]

Bump get stuck into that choccie, you definitely deserve it.

Poppy - we use a mixture of either cows milk or EBM. Depends on whether my pumping session has got a let-down or not (this evening, no let down...yesterday, let down) as can get anything from 1oz or 6oz. Cows milk is fine on cereal and in cooking from 6 months, as P says.

DD had been feeding up to five times a night...when we re-settled her, she had one night feed...and then slept until the morning! I was worried she was hungry, but DH and everyone here pointed out to me that there is no way our LOs would sleep that long if hungry!

 

[TennisGal]

O/T alert - but was just reading Weaning Section, and wanted to say (before I forget) we've found some very popular yoghurts! Rachels Organics 'My First Yogs'. DD had a pot of mango, and was delighted

 

[Poppy7]

Little man has just stirred and has gone in to full blown crying after 1 minute should I go in, reassure him, replace the dummy?????

 

[jacs]

My eyes are shutting, so I will reply properly tomorrow, but Polaris, I looove that pic of Thomas, just so sweet!

We got our sleeved bibs from John Lewis and Sainsburys. However, for some reason ALL of Evan's clothes have orange (always orange) stains down the front!
Thanks for the yog idea TG, must have a look.

Well done Bump! Be sure to tell us how your night went tomorrow!

 

[Poppy7]

This is the longest 5 minutes of my life. I'm going up to see him

 

[jacs]

Poppy - if you can bear to, try giving him a few mins to calm himself. If it's too much, or he doesn't calm himself, then go in and use the same method to resettle (assuming it's not his nappy or the like causing a problem).
Evan did this on and off on his first night of SS, but it didn't happen again. Good luck x

 

[Poppy7]

20 minutes and he's going back to sleep and has stopped crying. I didn't pick him up or nurse him once. I'm so proud of myself and him!! I shusshed him, stroked him and gave him a teddy to cuddle.

It wad FLIPPING hard though. I just wanted to pick him up and snuggle him so close.

Best go and sterilise my breast pump as you never know!!! I'm thinking the worst and reckon he'll wake again....when should I offer a feed considering he usually does feed at night?xx

 

[polaris]

Poppy - if you can bear to, try giving him a few mins to calm himself. If it's too much, or he doesn't calm himself, then go in and use the same method to resettle (assuming it's not his nappy or the like causing a problem).
Evan did this on and off on his first night of SS, but it didn't happen again. Good luck x

I agree with Jacs. It is worth leaving them for a few minutes to see if they will resettle, it is very hard but once they do figure out how to resettle themselves the wakings should become much less pretty much straight away.

Well Thomas is still asleep, he stirred at about quarter to ten but he went back off to sleep without me having to go into him, he just cried out a couple of times and then sighed to himself for about five minutes before all went quiet again. This is a new thing waking up at this time but at least he was able to resettle himself this evening without me having to feed him, yay! Hopefully we might be back to only one feed tonight?

 

[polaris]

20 minutes and he's going back to sleep and has stopped crying. I didn't pick him up or nurse him once. I'm so proud of myself and him!! I shusshed him, stroked him and gave him a teddy to cuddle.

It wad FLIPPING hard though. I just wanted to pick him up and snuggle him so close.

Best go and sterilise my breast pump as you never know!!! I'm thinking the worst and reckon he'll wake again....when should I offer a feed considering he usually does feed at night?xx

Your post crossed with my last post - well done hun, that is brilliant work! It is very hard not to pick them up and cuddle them but this will make it so much easier for both of you in the longer term. It's up to you what you feel comfortable with regarding the feed, if a reasonable amount of time has gone by and you think he is hungry then I would feed him - but even if you are going to feed him there is no harm in leaving a couple of minutes for him to wake up properly, I find that Thomas takes a better feed if he is fully awake and sometimes he will surprise me and go back to sleep without a feed. Once you have been doing sleepsense for a while and LO gets used to self-settling, then it will probably be obvious when he is hungry as it will be a different type of crying.

 

[Poppy7]

So far, so much better!!!! Elliott woke at 12 ish. I left him for a good few mnutes before intervening (it felt like much longer). It had been nearly 6 hours since a good feed as he didn't want to feed before bedtime (he usually does) so I did pick him up to feed him. Afterwards I put him down sleepy but awake and he settled back to sleep again

He then stirred at 2am. He wasn't crying hard but just whinging a bit. I laid there thinking I'll go to him in a minute when he just self settled not sure if he had dummy (I doubt it). I was amazed!!

He stirred again at about 3.25am. He was fussing at first and then started crying. He wasn't crying hard but he sounded angry. I left him 4 minutes before going to see him. I gave him his dummy and shusshed/stroked him. I also pushed his bear closer. He cried our for maybe half a minute more before grabbing his blankie and bear, sucking ferociously and....going back to sleep! This is such an improvement already!!!

I don't know how long he's going to stay asleep so I should really try and re-settle myself I just am excited that I've only picked him up once since putting him to bed. He may well have gone without a feed but never mind!

I would have tried leaving him longer before intervening the last time but is it just me or does any one else worry what the neighbours may think lol I get on with all of ours but I live in a quiet cul de sac and in the middle of the night he sounds rather loud and I worry they can hear and will think "poor baby" My closest neighbour says she never hears him at night but I always wonder that she's just being polite lol!

Anyway, not sure why I'm still writing, I should be sleeping!

Night, night.....I'm secretly hoping for a good long sleep now with no more wakings before 7am...but hey, one step at a time I suppose!xx

 

[Bumpontherun]

Poppy- well done, sounds like your night went much better than mine - I'm beginning to doubt that this will work for us now

So Helen fell asleep at 8:45 after an hour of crying. She woke at 9;17 and I left her for 10 mins, it sounded like whingey crying and I hoped she might fall asleep. No luck so I went back in and sat with her she was asleep at 9;43.

Heard the odd grunt but didn't really hear from her again until 3am she stirred and made various noises until 3:12 when she started to cry. She does usually take a big feed between 3-4. My plan had been if she woke before 2 to try and settle her, after 2 I would feed her. She took a good feed, both sides and then tried to go to sleep on the boob. I took her off and winded her which I don't normally do but I thought it would wake her up. I put her down at 3:36 she harumphed around and sucked her hand for a while but by 4:00 she was crying again. It was dreadful. She cried until about 4:50, then dropped off to sleep. I didn't pick her up as I didn't think it would help her settle but she was really screaming at some points.

Anyway she slept until 5:35 when she woke and cried, I gave her about 8 mins then couldn't take any more. This is her normal waking time but usually she comes to bed with me has a sleepy feed and we doze for another hour. Got her up, opened curtains, changed nappy and baby grow , she was all sweaty and we played for a bit. Then she started to grump so I fed her. Poor wee lamb tried to go to sleep on the boob but I wouldn't let her.

She's playing now but yawning and rubbing eyes, I'll have to get her to nap soon but I can't face anymore crying, want to feed her to sleep but scared of undoing last nights work.

Has anybody else had a baby who cried this long and still got good results? I expected her to drop off quite quickly after the night feed but she was awake for well over an hour.

Poppy - my reasons for doing SSvare that H needs to be fed to sleep everytime then sneaked into the cot. It often takes 2 or 3 goes to get her down and I'm exhausted by it. She doesn't sleep in the car and only naps for 40 mins at a time in the pram so basically I feel like I am it

 

[history_girls]

a quickie before work...

big and congratulations to poopy7 and bumponthe run you've done the hardest night of all!

Bump - my longest was 90 mins, which next night was 25, then 5, then 0! I have had an hour where I then picked her up and put her to sleep myself as she was just so distressed. Try to do bedtime before they are over tired - it always goes better. Hang in there.

Poppy - great news. hope he went til 7!

Our LO was a bit of a rat last night. Up on and off for two hours between 2 and 4. I ended up putting her to sleep the naughty way. SS was just not working and with work I had to sleep and LO needs all the sleep she can at night now she can't nap as well.

Lets hope year 9 are in a quiet mood......

 

[TennisGal]

Poppy - fab news! How did the rest of the night go?

Bump - Night One is always, always the worst...things can, and will, get better. I noted down the times DD shouted for...night one and two were quite long times, night three and four saw dramatic improvements.

I know how you feel, DH and I were so tired - I was getting upset, as I felt I had no energy for play during the day, as I was up most of the night. I was highly cynical (and even more so after night one!) but it does work. The hardest part is nearly over

HG - are you feeling better? Some nights is best to do whatever works! Here's hoping Year 9 were all lying awake pondering the elections or suchlike, and are too tired to be noisy...can but hope, right??

Well, DD had her midnight-ish feed...but she woke around 4. She settled after about 15 + mins (seemed a lot longer), but seemed really quite cross. She was shouting (a bit of crying at the end, but lots of shouting) I wonder if I should be giving her that feed? She did then sleep until 6:15...so surely she would have woken earlier if she was hungry? I feel really unsure...If she does have a feed, then I'm pretty much feeding every three hours (she normally wakes at 3am) through the 24. Except for the 10pm-ish slot DH thinks she's fine, as she would have been awake pretty soon afterwards if hungry...and when she had her early morning feed, she wasn't ravenous. She ate about half her weetabix and about 3/4 her apple and dried fruit compote.

I just feel really uncertain. Any ideas?

 

[TennisGal]

Jacs - am joining you with the orange stains on clothes! I seem to be perpetually using Vanish!

 

[polaris]

Morning!

Poppy - great news! Hope the rest of the night went well too - but even if it didn't - what fantastic progress already!

Bumpontherun - Honestly it will get easier. You have done the hardest night. My LO did not cry for that long (don't know how I would have coped ) but some of the other ladies' LOs did. Not sure about naps. I have read that night time sleep and day time sleep seem to be a bit separate so it is fine to use a different settling method for naps than for night time sleep and it won't confuse LO. So it would probably be OK to keep feeding to sleep for naps for the moment and just work on night time settling. I'm not sure though - what do other people think? I tend to think that nighttimes are enough stress to begin with and it's better to just make sure LO gets proper naps in the day so they are not overtired for the night.

TennisGal - I don't think it sounds like she needed the feed. My LO won't go back to sleep if he is really hungry. Also the fact that she was not ravenous for morning feed suggests she definitely didn't need the extra feed. Apparently it is better for them not to feed during the night IF they don't need the feeds, because they have to get used to their digestive system slowing down overnight which is what happens when they get older.

We had a good night - just one feed at about 2.30 and then had a lie in till 7.15!!! Of course I was still awake at 6.30 wondering if LO was OK and why he wasn't waking up, LOL! Oh and there were definite 'bits' in the nappy this morning, so something is definitely going in!

 

[Bumpontherun]

Thanks everyone, I know I have to keep going now I've started or all those tears last night will have been in vain.

Discussed it with DH this am and he thought I shouldn't be feeding to sleep during the day either. I guess he's maybe right and I should just face it all at once and not risk confusing her......so here I am listening to her cry again 7 mins so far.

I need to walk the dogs at some point so will have to do one nap in pram so at least we will get a bit of a break.

OMG she's just fallen asleep after only 8 mins, can't believe it!!!!

I know this nap will probably be short but at least it didn't take an hour of screaming.

I'm so grateful to you all for your support, this is so hard but this thread really gives me hope.......think I might risk showering! Good luck with your naps everyone.

 

[Poppy7]

Elliott didn't go until 7am unfortunately...he woke at 5am and was just talking to himself. I let him go and he must have resettled as
I didn't hear him again until 7am. At 7am I did bring him in with me for a feed and cuddle and we both woke just after 8am.

So the night wakings were still excessive (I just don't know what happens from midnight onwards as this is our trouble time) but the big improvement was I only picked
him up to feed once. Normally I would have to do this everytime. I'm still as tired as ever this morning but hopefully tonight will be better and he won't wake as often.

Bumpontherun, you have done so well I know for sure that if I was in your shoes I would have given in. I really hope you see a drastic improvement tonight.

I know ultimately losing the dummy will improve things but I don't think I can go through that right now.

Thank you all for your support. You're amazing.xx

 

[polaris]

Wahey - bumpontherun - that is so fantastic that she settled for her nap after just 8 minutes!! She must be starting to get the hang of it. You are probably right to do it all in one go if you can face it. As you say at least the pram is a bit of a break - that is my escape mechanism if the day is going pear shaped I just bring LO out for a long walk and he will always go to sleep.

Poppy - I think the night-wakings will get less now that you are not feeding so much. However, Thomas does often still stir and resettle himself and sometimes has a little chat to himself first - but I don't properly wake up anymore unless he actually starts properly crying. I don't use the baby monitor at nights anymore because it was just keeping me awake every time he went into a light sleep I was waking up, half the time he wasn't even awake but I was! He is literally in the next room so I hear him straight away anyway.

 

[Bumpontherun]

Elliott didn't go until 7am unfortunately...he woke at 5am and was just talking to himself. I let him go and he must have resettled as
I didn't hear him again until 7am. At 7am I did bring him in with me for a feed and cuddle and we both woke just after 8am.

So the night wakings were still excessive (I just don't know what happens from midnight onwards as this is our trouble time) but the big improvement was I only picked
him up to feed once. Normally I would have to do this everytime. I'm still as tired as ever this morning but hopefully tonight will be better and he won't wake as often.

Bumpontherun, you have done so well I know for sure that if I was in your shoes I would have given in. I really hope you see a drastic improvement tonight.

I know ultimately losing the dummy will improve things but I don't think I can go through that right now.

Thank you all for your support. You're amazing.xx

Poppy I feel the same as you, I'm in fact more tired than usual because
i didn't get my extra hours nap this morning and I couldn't sleep between 1am and 3am as I was awake worrying about when she woke up You had a tough night but you did make real progress so well done

I was right Helen's nap was 29 mins long, I couldn't leave her for another 25 mins so got her up. She lasted an hour before having a mini meltdown at which point I took her out in the buggy, she slept for an hour so will hopefully cope until her next naptime. The literature doesn't really address how to cope with an exhausted sleep deprived baby who doesn't sleep that well in the buggy............

 

[Arcanegirl]

Hello girls

Well after a very busy week were finally calming down now to get back into routine.
Things havent been too off, were still doing the same routing for getting Alex down for naps and night sleeping, hes just taking longer to settle recently. Were edging very close to the 10 min mark, sometimes even past it but hes been doing the type of cry that i feel i dont need to go in for (the whingy sorta cry)