Sleep Sense Support Group!

[hivechild]

Hivechild, Polaris and all - thank you so much! The cot only arrived today so we're starting tomorrow. I'm worried about the nap thing, it's so hot she won't even sleep on me and is desperately overtired. I can't wait to get started though.
Thank you again!

Once she's used to napping on her own, you may find she naps even better if the heat is bothering her so much. Ronan gets really hot when he naps on me! Good luck when you do get started.

Polaris - Fingers crossed on making it through the night and lots of sleepy dust for Thomas!

HG - It is a little disconcerting when he naps that long and it's not on me. Before I started naptime bootcamp, the last time he slept on his tummy was when he was about 6 weeks old and it turned into a 6 hour afternoon nap. Hubby kept telling me to go lay down and I kept saying 'no, he'll wake up any minute now so it's not worth it. I'll just feel worse.' It was actually one of the catalysts that lead us here since I realized he really could sleep that long.

PM - Glad to hear no one got hurt. I hate dealing with insurance and repairs etc. so I feel your pain!

 

[TennisGal]

PM Poor you, what a horrible thing to happen. So glad no one got hurt...but what a pain, having to sort it all out

HC - lovely new avatar piccie!

Littledemonme - we keep the fan on permanently at the moment, am sure both the cooling effect and noise help DD

P - how did it go???

WELL, DD woke up at 3am for a feed (despite having a whopper before she went to bed!) and then woke up properly at 4:45. She never normally does this. I was just uttering sounds along the lines of 'pleasse' 'five more minssss'. DH got up with her until six, and she's now happily playing! I'm blaming the weather...bedroom is SO light with all the windows wide open. I'm so tired, though!!

On an exciting note, she took a few steps with her walker yesterday Only two or three, and with me right behind...but very cute!!

I saw the tennis yesterday, and am GUTTED. Federer out! I knew it had to happen someday, but...it's sad. Still, well done to Murray. He's playing the most attractive tennis of those remaining, and actually attacking rather than defending.

Got a lunch do with DD today - with scones. She's very excited by these at the moment, and can get quite cross if her piece doesn't come quickly enough! I'm going to need a face lift before I go out in public, as my bags are near my mouth.

 

[polaris]

Good morning all!

Well I think I can categorically say that last night was a disaster!

He was unsettled anyway and woke up briefly a couple of times during the earlier half of the night but put himself back to sleep quickly without needing any intervention from me. Then he woke up at 4 a.m. which is normally quite a good time for him to wake as I normally feed him quickly and he goes back to sleep pretty easily. But anyway I tried to stick to my plan of not feeding. OH was in work so I was on my own. As soon as he saw me he started properly crying and trying to soothe him was just making things worse, so I tried giving him some water in a bottle. He drank about an ounce and I put him back in the cot and went back to bed, he seemed nice and calm and I really thought he was going back to sleep! But after about ten minutes he started crying again so I went back into him and ended up feeding him in the hopes he would go back to sleep. (I know I said I wasn't going to!) Anyway he still didn't go back to sleep so I might as well not have bothered. He eventually went back to sleep at about twenty to six I think and then woke up for the day at twenty past six.

I'm so exhausted and feel a bit rubbish that I didn't stick to the plan especially since he didn't even go back to sleep after I fed him. It's so hard though! In the daytime I'm sure that he doesn't need a feed at night, but at night I keep thinking he might be hungry and that he won't be able to go back to sleep if he's hungry! I think maybe I should just stick to my original plan of giving him another month to drop the night feeds by himself as I don't seem to be able to manage not to feed him at night anyway. Maybe blacking out the room will help him to get back to sleep if I do keep feeding him at that time? Any suggestions welcome as I am too tired to think!

PM - that sounds like a HORRIBLE day. Dentist and a traffic accident, what a total nightmare! Thank goodness nobody was hurt though.

TennisGal - oh no, I really hope your DD isn't going to make a habit of waking up so early. It is not fun at all!! But how exciting about starting to walk with her walker!!!

 

[TennisGal]

argh, P, am so with you on this...we've frequently said we'll stop the night feed, but in the middle of the night, it's so hard. We've reduced the number to only one feed - and she dropped those pretty well, but she does not want to lose this feed. I guess we'll keep going with it for the time being, and see what happens.

Am not sure what best to suggest! But

 

[Cattia]

Hey ladies!

PM- how scary for you I am gald everyone is OK and hope you manage to get it all sorted without too many issues.

Littledemonme, welcome! Let us know how you get on. I think the advice about starting with nightimes and then moving onto naps is god one, as naps are definitely harder.

Polaris, we are really struggling with the same issues. I did really well for a couple of nights getting Abigail to drop all but the last night feed, one night she even went through until quarter to six with me re-settling her, but then on the third night it all went pear shaped. Because I had to go back to work we then kind of gave up, but I have had the exact night you describe with feeding her water and then her waking up ten minutes later and haveing trouble settling her again. It will soon be the summer and I have to work really hard on getting her to drop some of these night feeds - we're on 3 most nights now, much worse than when she was a newborn, and I can't see it can be the 6 month growth spurt as it's been going on for weeks and weeks and weeks

Hope everyone is in for a jolly good night

 

[PieMistress]

Morning All!

Hope the nights weren't too bad for everyone?

After 2 nights of Kyle sleeping through until 2.30, then a feed then through until 6.30am last night was not so good. He woke up at midnight so earlier than our feed 'cut-off' which I was dreading. We did 'leave and check' for 45 mins until he fell asleep until 5am (then fed him and we woke him up at 6.45am). I am now really worried that we are giving him mixed signals by sometimes letting him cry and other times going in and feeding him. I don't want to cut him off from 2 night feeds in one go (although maybe this is best I don't know!!) hence if he has woken too early for a feed we 'leave and check' but if we are going to feed him I do go straight in. Any suggestions? Should I just go cold turkey on them both or go back to feeding him twice a night for a bit longer (although then he's cried for nothing the 3 nights he has cried). It's all so difficult to know what to do, every night we question ourselves (and last night ended up falling out about it, not good at 2am)

Hopefully the van will get repaired next week and I can try to claim back my excess through the broker! Although he ran into the back of me am sure he is going to deny liability.

For those of you who offer water instead of milk at night is it in a bottle or a cup? Kyle isn't quite there yet with drinking water from a cup properly. Is this better you think that just not offering him anything when he wakens? Part of me is like, well how long can these night feeds go on for if we let him drop them by himself but deep down I think it might be a good while!

Polaris - Kyle's room is pitch black or very close to it. We got some stuff called easy black out which works really well (and you can take it when you go away for the night too). I even have a towel under his door to stop light coming in!

Hive - How are the naps going?

Swimming this morning and OH is working from home today so has witnessed Kyle's unwillingness to accept anything from a spoon (yoghurt). It's made the decision to do BLW easier I guess. Yesterday he put his face in the bowl of cauliflower cheese and enjoyed some toast this morning. I don't think he's swallowing much though and he loves the cheese straws I made

 

[TennisGal]

just a quick one, Cattia - our six month spurt went on WEEKS!

 

[polaris]

PieMistress - I totally hate that it is so complicated to decide what to do! If I KNEW that the right thing to do was cut off night feedings and that we would all sleep better for it after a few days, then I would definitely do it. But I'm just not sure. And I'm even less sure in the middle of the night. I also keep hoping that he will just drop the night feed of his own accord if I just keep going as we are. Last night Thomas woke at 4.30 and I went in and fed him and he went straight back to sleep until 5.45 and happily chatted away to himself until 6.15 when I got him up. That was so much easier than the previous night when I tried not to feed him but ended up feeding him anyway.

OH thinks that we should just go cold turkey on all night feedings but I actually don't think I'm able to do that at the moment. I think that I am going to go with the flow for a bit and keep on with one night feed for the time being. But that's because it worked out well last night, I will probably be on here again tomorrow saying that the night feed has to go! For the last three days Thomas has only had two naps, so I think I am going to try dropping the third nap and see how that affects his sleep over the next week or so.

Oh yeah, regarding giving water at night, I give it in a bottle but I must also say that it has never actually worked to settle him back to sleep.

 

[polaris]

Fourth day with only two naps. OH finally put up new curtain rail and the room is a lot darker than it was but light still gets in, grrr. Off to google that easy black out stuff. Can you take it up and down easily or do you have to leave it up all the time?

 

[history_girls]

Everytime I miss a day there is loads to catch up on! Been so busy - sports day and school music concert yesterday so I didn't get in until 10pm! I was emotionally blackmailed by my form into doing the teachers wheelbarrow race and the 60 yard dash. Apparently the video they have posted on you tube clearly shows me lying on the track shouting I can't do it! Very funny but probably very embarassing - won't be watching that one. On the postivie my form won so doughnuts all round.

LO has been on top form - slept like a trooper. Daddy did bedtime all alone last night and when I came in I thought he was whispering to her but it was the dog phew.

PM - firstly well done on the dentist trip and second what a prat who crashed into you. I'm very jealous you have a camper van - that is my dream! We have a backpack carrier for dog walks and we love it! Comes with sun shade and full rain cover. Love it!

In terms of the night feed we FF but one night she just didn't wake up and from that day we have not fed at night - we just went cold turkey and didn't have any real problems.

Polaris - What a night - poor you. I hope the heat today hasn't made him cranky to add to your tiredness. Hopefully he will conk out tongiht.

TG - 4.45am?? what is she like!!! Phoebe has had a couple of 5.15am this week but at least I got my ironing done before work. Bad news about murray.....

Right I think I've done everyone - if I haven't i'm sorry but my room at school was 32 degrees today and I had teenagers all day being very iratable in it. Need my pizza delivered quickly now.....

 

[PieMistress]

History - Now you have to send us a link to the youtube clip! We bought a VW panel van and converted it into a camper. Couldn't afford to get the pop top done when we did the initial conversion but it's going in to get it done in August to make it 4-berth rather than 2-berth

Polaris - We bought from here :https://www.easyblindsonline.co.uk/10.html As our window has 3 panes of glass we put strips of velcro around each pane and leave 2 pieces of material up all the time and then just tie back the 3rd piece of material with a bull dog clip when Kyle isn't sleeping

Well, OH gave Kyle a bottle tonight before bed and he then proceeed to cry for 20 mins before sleep. He really likes a snuggle with the boob before bed (he doesn't fall asleep though) so I think we really have to introduce a story after the feed (he gets a story as part of his nap wind down). I now have to think about when i'm going to start cutting down on the BF and giving bottles instead for 7 weeks time when i'm due back at work - SOB!

How long are your babies awake from their last nap now until bedtime?

xx

 

[polaris]

History - Now you have to send us a link to the youtube clip! We bought a VW panel van and converted it into a camper. Couldn't afford to get the pop top done when we did the initial conversion but it's going in to get it done in August to make it 4-berth rather than 2-berth

Polaris - We bought from here :https://www.easyblindsonline.co.uk/10.html As our window has 3 panes of glass we put strips of velcro around each pane and leave 2 pieces of material up all the time and then just tie back the 3rd piece of material with a bull dog clip when Kyle isn't sleeping

Well, OH gave Kyle a bottle tonight before bed and he then proceeed to cry for 20 mins before sleep. He really likes a snuggle with the boob before bed (he doesn't fall asleep though) so I think we really have to introduce a story after the feed (he gets a story as part of his nap wind down). I now have to think about when i'm going to start cutting down on the BF and giving bottles instead for 7 weeks time when i'm due back at work - SOB!

How long are your babies awake from their last nap now until bedtime?

xx

Thanks PM - those easy blinds look great! Wish I'd found them before bothering with all the faffing around with blackout curtains!

Are you planning to stop breastfeeding when you go back to work or do you think you will keep on with morning/bedtime feeds? I really love breastfeeding Thomas and can't imagine giving it up. Luckily OH seems to be coming round to the idea - he was even telling a friend of ours about the WHO recommendations on breastfeeding the other day!!

Now that Thomas isn't having his third nap he is awake for about four hours before bedtime. But that is a stretch for him and he does take quite a bit of entertaining and I have often had to bring him out for a walk to chill him out. When he was still having third nap he was only awake for two hours before bedtime which wasn't long enough. About three and a half hours is what he can do comfortably now.

 

[PieMistress]

The blinds pretty much block out all the light - and if you order the suction cups too you can take the material on hols with you (worked a treat when we went to Dumfries a couple of weeks ago).

Am hoping to keep up the AM and PM breastfeeds when i'm back at work so will have to cut out the mid-morning and mid-afternoon breastfeeds. Either that or I will do the AM breastfeed and OH will feed him a bottle before bed. That way we each get some 'me' time with Kyle. I will really really miss it I met a woman the other day who said she suffered from delayed PND after she stopped BF and had to go for counselling!

Kyle was only awake for 1hr 30 mins after his cat nap before we put him down for bed which might explain his 20 minutes of crying? It's normally 2 hours he is awake. There was no way round it tonight though due to the way his naps went other than keep him up late. He can now stay awake nearly 2.5hrs between wakening and being put in cot for his nap which means the day often needs a bit of working to get 3 naps in (but he isn't ready to drop the cat nap yet).

Forecast is looking good for tomorrow!! Hoping to take Kyle out for a walk in his new backpack. He loved sitting in it today wearing his sunglasses and sunhat!

Sleepy Dust everyone!!

 

[polaris]

The blinds pretty much block out all the light - and if you order the suction cups too you can take the material on hols with you (worked a treat when we went to Dumfries a couple of weeks ago).

Am hoping to keep up the AM and PM breastfeeds when i'm back at work so will have to cut out the mid-morning and mid-afternoon breastfeeds. Either that or I will do the AM breastfeed and OH will feed him a bottle before bed. That way we each get some 'me' time with Kyle. I will really really miss it I met a woman the other day who said she suffered from delayed PND after she stopped BF and had to go for counselling!

Kyle was only awake for 1hr 30 mins after his cat nap before we put him down for bed which might explain his 20 minutes of crying? It's normally 2 hours he is awake. There was no way round it tonight though due to the way his naps went other than keep him up late. He can now stay awake nearly 2.5hrs between wakening and being put in cot for his nap which means the day often needs a bit of working to get 3 naps in (but he isn't ready to drop the cat nap yet).

Forecast is looking good for tomorrow!! Hoping to take Kyle out for a walk in his new backpack. He loved sitting in it today wearing his sunglasses and sunhat!

Sleepy Dust everyone!!

Hmmm, yes maybe that was why he took longer than usual to settle at bedtime. I know exactly what you mean about struggling to get three naps in, feels like a strategic operation sometimes the amount of planning that goes into trying to make sure our babies get their zzz's!

I have been thinking a lot about the whole night feeding issue and I think a big part of the problem is that I feel very ambivalent about night weaning. I remember Cattia talking about this too - on the one hand I would love for Thomas to sleep through without needing a feed, but on the other hand there is something so lovely about feeding your sleepy baby in the middle of the night. Thomas is not a very cuddly baby during the day as he is too wriggly and into everything so I think I would really miss my nighttime snuggles. Also although during the day I rationally think that it would be a good idea to wean him from nightfeeds, at night time I just feel so differently and it seems to go against all of my instincts not to feed him. I know part of it is that I hope that by feeding him he will settle back to sleep quickly but it's not just that. It's also that I love being able to give him comfort and it seems so wrong not to do that. He's growing up so fast in so many ways that maybe there is a part of me that just wants to keep him a little baby for a bit longer. And I think that's OK for the moment. Sorry for waffling on, well done if you can make any sense of my ramblings, LOL!

 

[polaris]

Well after all my stressing about whether or not to feed Thomas at night, he slept through last night (well, until quarter to six - and chatted away happily till himself for 15 minutes until I got him up)!! He didn't look for a feed until 6.30! I'm not expecting it to happen again tonight but it does make me think that maybe he is going to drop the nightfeed by himself soon so I'm going to just stop stressing about it - if it feels right to feed him I will feed him and if it doesn't I won't!

 

[PieMistress]

That's fantastic news Polaris Gives me hope!

Well done Thomas (and you too!)

I know what you mean about the night feeds and cuddles though. I really don't mind the one night feed and love giving Kyle those special cuddles! It's getting him down to one night feed that's difficult at the moment although we are still sticking to our 2am time limit. Last night he woke up again at midnight then cried on/off for about 20 mins before falling asleep until 4am when I promptly fed him. If I knew, for sure, he would give up the night feeds himself in a couple of months then I would just carry on but i'm not totally sure as I know some babies can keep them going until they well over 1 year old!

Another gorgeous day here so when he stirs from his morning nap will head off out and enjoy the sunshine! He managed 3 spoonfuls of porridge this morning and a small piece of toast - I need to keep reminding myself how slow BLW can be and stay chilled out about it and not expect him to be eating loads straight away!x

 

[polaris]

That's fantastic news Polaris Gives me hope!

Well done Thomas (and you too!)

I know what you mean about the night feeds and cuddles though. I really don't mind the one night feed and love giving Kyle those special cuddles! It's getting him down to one night feed that's difficult at the moment although we are still sticking to our 2am time limit. Last night he woke up again at midnight then cried on/off for about 20 mins before falling asleep until 4am when I promptly fed him. If I knew, for sure, he would give up the night feeds himself in a couple of months then I would just carry on but i'm not totally sure as I know some babies can keep them going until they well over 1 year old!

Totally - when I was googling night weaning most of the stories were about toddlers and older babies (over 1) who were still waking to feed two or three times a night, or more. I just wouldn't fancy that at all!!

Another gorgeous day here so when he stirs from his morning nap will head off out and enjoy the sunshine! He managed 3 spoonfuls of porridge this morning and a small piece of toast - I need to keep reminding myself how slow BLW can be and stay chilled out about it and not expect him to be eating loads straight away!x

It's gorgeous here too, they keep forecasting rain for us but it has never arrived. Don't worry that he's not eating very much at the moment. Even with TW they start off with very small quantities, one or two icecubes of puree, some of which certainly gets spat back out down their bib. It sounds like he is doing brilliantly, apparently some BLW babies won't even taste food until well over seven months.

 

[TennisGal]

Oh, this hot weather is playing real havoc with DDs sleep. Last night, she didn't sleep until 9:30! She had really rosy cheeks and looked v. uncomfortable - so DH and I brought her downstairs to the sitting room (coolest room) and made in darker and quiet. We ended up reading by lamplight, while she enjoyed a cooler sleep. Poor darling.

Anyway, she did sleep until 7:30, so that's good

I am with you ladies on the nightfeeding - DD still has one or two feeds in the night, and I really love it. Something really special about that little sleepy face. We've dropped the afternoon feed - so are on four or five a day. So relieved she's back on it, after that two day 'not interested' phase.

Not sure what will happen with work - it's likely I'll go in for three half days, and do a bit from home...and I know I need to think about how it will work, because going 'cold turkey' on one or two feeds will not be popular.

PM - sounds like Kyle is doing really well with BLW! We have days where DD can't eat enough (she was into sole goujons yesterday!) and days where she'll literally eat a bit of yoghurt and mango and then lose interest.

P - how have the sleeps been going? Well done Thomas!!

Weather is looooovely here, too. We're going for a walk later, and then going to a lovely pub to sit in the garden for lunch...they always find something to accommodate DD whenever we go

 

[polaris]

Thomas slept straight through again last night until a quarter to six! I got him up at 6 and he didn't look for a feed until 6.30. I'm a bit shocked that after all my deliberation about whether to feed him at night or not he has just started to sleep through by himself (even if we are up a little bit early for my liking!). It's only been two nights though so I don't want to speak too soon. Now I'm back to wondering whether or not to feed him if he wakes up during the night tonight.

I think it was definitely time for him to drop the third nap. The first couple of days it was difficult to stretch him through till bedtime but yesterday he was fine and didn't even seem that tired so I think he's getting used to not having it.

 

[TennisGal]

Fab news, Polaris - and Thomas!