Sleepless Nights Support Thread

[RickT]

I have just posted this 5 mins ago.. and then saw this thread -


https://www.babyandbump.com/baby-club/278874-4-month-old-not-sleep-please-help.html

Hello all,

Dad here looking for advice!

Looking for some advice on a subject which has been covered many times before "SLEEP"

Our son is now 4 1/2 months old and has never slept for more than 3 hours in a row, day or night.

We have seem to have tried everything which has been suggested in books, online and through word of mouth to no avail.

We try to have a set routine which includes bath time, feed and settle down which where the plan fails!!

He will not settle in his Moses basket, crib or cot bed in his room, the only way to settle him to the first stage of sleep is to hold him, rocking to sleep, then when we try and put him down he instantly wakes up screaming!! And then we have to start again.

He can sometimes just fall asleeplaid in the middle of our bed on top of the duvet on a blanket when we are in the room, (no co-sleeping) - then move him to his crib in our room once he’s fully asleep.

We have tried leaving him in his crib to cry it out, in period or 5-7 minutes, but he get really distressed, high pitch screaming! (Argh!!)

He's on the bottle, taking around 5/6/7oz a feed depending on time of Apatimil 1,

We know the screaming is not a medical issue with him, as he will stop as soon as we pick him up and when he's up and about he’s a really happy baby! (he has us wrapped around his finger I hear you all saying!! - I know!)


Is anyone else experiencing this at the moment or recently?? We are both knacked from the lack of sleep, Mum more so as I tend to try and get at least 3/4 hours straight sleep in the spare room on a working week day.

All we want is for him to settle himself to sleep in his crib and at least get 4 or more hours straight sleep!!

Any advice would be much appreciated

Rick

 

[FemmeEnceinte]

Babies sleep through when they're ready. Unfortunately for you, it's not something you can force.

However, you'll find that many of us on here co-sleep. Some babies need more contact than others, they don't try to manipulate you or wrap you around their finger, they just need more than others... all babies are different.

I'd say, look up safe co-sleeping guides. You'll have to stay in the spare room but it's a small price to pay to save your sanity I'm sure x

 

[FemmeEnceinte]

Bad couple of nights for me... had 2 hours last night and 2 hours tonight, all broken sleep. I HATE relatives coming to stay, they are so loud that they constantly wake her all day through her naps and then we get this.

No more overnight visits!!!

 

[honey08]

i shudnt moan (but im guna) think its cos hes teething more,morgan cant stil be hungry, he usually sleeps 6am till 630am! but twice this wk hes been getting up at 430am , avin a bottle and like now hes crashed out already

whys he doing this ? hes so so tired by teatime i cant keep him up any longer than i do , im no moaning cos he doesnt do this often just wondering wots waking him up ?x

 

[welshwarriors]

Joe slept 2 night ago from 6.30pm until 4am, had a bottle and went back to sleep until 8am.
Silly me was thinking....mmmhhh maybe I get another night with lots of sleep....but NOOOOO. He woke up for a bottle at 12 and at 4am. I'm so tired.

 

[Mellie1988]

Well I posted on here a few weeks ago, Theo was then waking up twice in the night (1am and 4am)...
I've now managed to get him to drop the 1am feed , I just kept putting his dummy in instead and hes finally realised its not worth waking up for, he obviously wasn't hungry enough or he would still be waking!
So he now goes down between 7:30-8:30 then sleeps until 4, one night it was even 5! I'm so pleased just hope it continues!

Hes started drinking more of his bottles now, he did go through a stage of only drinking 3-4oz at a time, but hes back to drinking 6oz so i'm hoping he will be sleeping through shortly? Fingers x'd!!

 

[Reedy]

about 2 weeks ago we had a week of Finley sleeping through from 8.15pm - 7.10am he then got a cold & was waking from 2.30am every 10 minutes until 6.30am when he would get up DH & I were knackered, his cold has started to go but he's still waking at 2.30am & then waking at around 6-6.30am, he's tired because when I put his dummy in he falls back to sleep but then he keeps putting his hands to his mouth & knocking his dummy out & then crying again, its sooo tiring, I was getting used to him sleeping through & now he's back to his old ways (he used to do this before) I think its because he is teething bless him, we have teething gel but it doesnt stop him knocking his dummy out all the time, anybody got any suggestions???

 

[golcarlilly]

Hi folks, I had a bad night again last night Myles was up at 3am then waking on and off till he finally got up a half five - yawn I am knackered!!

Reedy :wave: have you tried dosing him with calpol before bed that seems to work for the first half of the night for us?

 

[Reedy]

Reedy :wave: have you tried dosing him with calpol before bed that seems to work for the first half of the night for us?

Tracy - he is fine for the first half its the second half where he keeps waking up thing is its not just for me, its for him too as he's knackered, he's already on his 3rd nap today

 

[angelstardust]

Can I join even though it is my almost 5 year old who keeps me up?

He has cerebral palsy and goes through periods of vomiting at night for no reason. As well as waking because he is stiff and sore. And the random '4am is morning, like totally mum' episodes too.

Last night I went to bed at 11pm, Amber (baby, see siggy, I forget how old she is) was awake and has a bit of a cold. So I git her up for a cuddle till her nose unblocked a bit, settled her for 11.30pm, then DS1 (8) was up for a pee and a speech about his nintendo DS. I got some sleep about midnight, DS2 up at 1am sick, luckily in the plastic box that stays in his bed, so sorted that out, sat with him a wee while. Back to bed at 2am, back up at 4am with DS2 again who needed a drink, back to sleep for an hour, back up with DS1 asking if it was morning just after 5am, he got told no, 6am he was back in so was told to go downstairs and watch tv quietly, Amber up at 6.30am and brought in bed with me, alarm goes off at 7am, my head hurts so much and I've came down with a head cold so I get some paracetamol and climb back in bed for 15mins that turns into hitting snooze every 9mins till 8am when I get up knowing I'm now running late, boys being very loud and head cold and headache is trying to kill me, swallow a coffee while getting kids fed/washed/dressed/ready, DS1 leaves at 8.45 for school, DH, DS2, Amber and I leave at 9am to take DS2 to nursery in the next town and drop off my car for an MOT that was due a month ago, oh and the road tax was due yesterday too (crap!). Got that done, car not ready to pick DS2 up at 12, so he has to walk, which means that tonight he will be up with sore legs again (and probably sick because he is sick if he has walked a lot that day) and tomorrow night will be the same because he is going for a walk and a train ride tomorrow at nursery.

All in all, a good night!

 

[Reedy]

I think I'm going to have to start feeding him when he wakes up at around 4am because I'm absolutly shattered I think that could be why he is waking doesnt help that he still has a stuffy nose & teething too bless him, he isnt getting much sleep either, I'll be glad when dh is home tomorrow night.

 

[juliespencer9]

Can I join even though it is my almost 5 year old who keeps me up?

He has cerebral palsy and goes through periods of vomiting at night for no reason. As well as waking because he is stiff and sore. And the random '4am is morning, like totally mum' episodes too.

Last night I went to bed at 11pm, Amber (baby, see siggy, I forget how old she is) was awake and has a bit of a cold. So I git her up for a cuddle till her nose unblocked a bit, settled her for 11.30pm, then DS1 (8) was up for a pee and a speech about his nintendo DS. I got some sleep about midnight, DS2 up at 1am sick, luckily in the plastic box that stays in his bed, so sorted that out, sat with him a wee while. Back to bed at 2am, back up at 4am with DS2 again who needed a drink, back to sleep for an hour, back up with DS1 asking if it was morning just after 5am, he got told no, 6am he was back in so was told to go downstairs and watch tv quietly, Amber up at 6.30am and brought in bed with me, alarm goes off at 7am, my head hurts so much and I've came down with a head cold so I get some paracetamol and climb back in bed for 15mins that turns into hitting snooze every 9mins till 8am when I get up knowing I'm now running late, boys being very loud and head cold and headache is trying to kill me, swallow a coffee while getting kids fed/washed/dressed/ready, DS1 leaves at 8.45 for school, DH, DS2, Amber and I leave at 9am to take DS2 to nursery in the next town and drop off my car for an MOT that was due a month ago, oh and the road tax was due yesterday too (crap!). Got that done, car not ready to pick DS2 up at 12, so he has to walk, which means that tonight he will be up with sore legs again (and probably sick because he is sick if he has walked a lot that day) and tomorrow night will be the same because he is going for a walk and a train ride tomorrow at nursery.

All in all, a good night!

You poor thing!

After reading what your nights are like i will never moan again, I have one child and thought that was hard work!

Shes never been a good sleeper, sleeps in my bed with me now, ive given up getting up and down all night.

Is this what a normal night is like in your house hold? or a one off?

 

[angelstardust]

Can I join even though it is my almost 5 year old who keeps me up?

He has cerebral palsy and goes through periods of vomiting at night for no reason. As well as waking because he is stiff and sore. And the random '4am is morning, like totally mum' episodes too.

Last night I went to bed at 11pm, Amber (baby, see siggy, I forget how old she is) was awake and has a bit of a cold. So I git her up for a cuddle till her nose unblocked a bit, settled her for 11.30pm, then DS1 (8) was up for a pee and a speech about his nintendo DS. I got some sleep about midnight, DS2 up at 1am sick, luckily in the plastic box that stays in his bed, so sorted that out, sat with him a wee while. Back to bed at 2am, back up at 4am with DS2 again who needed a drink, back to sleep for an hour, back up with DS1 asking if it was morning just after 5am, he got told no, 6am he was back in so was told to go downstairs and watch tv quietly, Amber up at 6.30am and brought in bed with me, alarm goes off at 7am, my head hurts so much and I've came down with a head cold so I get some paracetamol and climb back in bed for 15mins that turns into hitting snooze every 9mins till 8am when I get up knowing I'm now running late, boys being very loud and head cold and headache is trying to kill me, swallow a coffee while getting kids fed/washed/dressed/ready, DS1 leaves at 8.45 for school, DH, DS2, Amber and I leave at 9am to take DS2 to nursery in the next town and drop off my car for an MOT that was due a month ago, oh and the road tax was due yesterday too (crap!). Got that done, car not ready to pick DS2 up at 12, so he has to walk, which means that tonight he will be up with sore legs again (and probably sick because he is sick if he has walked a lot that day) and tomorrow night will be the same because he is going for a walk and a train ride tomorrow at nursery.

All in all, a good night!

You poor thing!

After reading what your nights are like i will never moan again, I have one child and thought that was hard work!

Shes never been a good sleeper, sleeps in my bed with me now, ive given up getting up and down all night.

Is this what a normal night is like in your house hold? or a one off?

A normal night I will be up twice with one or another usually DS2. The 5am/6am/7am is normal though.

A bad night I can be sitting next to DS2's bed most of the night if he is very sore or sick, I can't leave him because he gets worried and scared when he is as sick, and it is very much every 20-30mins he is a little bit sick.

The worst I had was when he had a run of 10 sick nights the beginning of Febuary. He is fine during the day it's just at night and we have no idea why he is sick. But they were very bad nights and no chance to catch up on my sleep because DH was working and his day off he had to go do something. It was horrible and during the day I was useless. And of course, with 3 I can't really nap.

DH can't help because he works long hours, so I'm on my own.

Generally I am ok if I can get between 2am-5am undisturbed, but if one wakes up during those 3 hours I am rubbish the next day. Usually manage to somehow survive till dinner time then tiredness hits me hard and I need to lie down.

But I am used to it and I don't work. The house is usually a mess and there is just no way I can keep up with everything but I try not to put pressure on myself for it. It gets done before we all get E-coli which is the main thing! If I can get one morning where I can lie in to about midday (when DH is off) it usually makes up for it.

And it is easier now he has started using his tub/box, before that it was 2 or 3 bed changes a night.

 

[juliespencer9]

angelstardust, You must be a very strong patient person. you deserve an award!
Do you have help with your son in the day, like a carer? I dont know how you cope.

 

[bluebaby]

I was hoping I could join you ladies.

My LO was a good sleeper up to she turned 8 weeks. She was sleeping from 10pm til between 5-8am and it was great as I need my sleep and have always loved my bed.

At 2 months she then started waking at 1am, 4am and then 7am. Myself and my OH were getting no time together as my LO wasn't going to bed until 10pm and I was a mess as I was getting no sleep so I moved her last feed forward to 8pm and she was still waking for a feed at 1am, 4am and 7am.
(she took at bottle each time about 4-5oz)

This week I thought I had the answer. I put her to bed at 8pm and I then dream fed her at 12am thinking she would sleep through but she woke at 4am and then 6am to start the day and wouldn't go back to sleep.

She def doesn't need the fed at 4am as she only takes 3oz then falls asleep and she drinks 8oz at 12am at her dream feed but she needs it to fall asleep otherwise she just screams!

I'm at a loss what do I do??

 

[Reedy]

Another bad night last night x i would love to know why he keeps waking up!!! He goes to bed without a dummy so surely he cant be waking up in the middle of the night for that can he??
He woke around 2.30am last night & kept waking up until around 4.45am until in the end I was that tired I got him in to bed with me (DH had got up to go to work) and he slept soundly until 6.40am. This isnt something I do every night so he cant be waking for this either.
He is teething at the minute but he isnt waking up screaming (like when he teeths during the day)
I have tried leaving him to see if he will settle himself back & on the odd occasion he has but most of the time he just gets more worked up until he is crying.
His naps are all over the place in the day & hardly naps for more than 30 minutes at a time

anyone got any suggestions???

 

[Helabela]

hi everyone, im joining in this thread because i find it very difficult to do the night time feeds for my 2 week old. It was fine at first, but the past 2 nights i just want to ignore my babys cries and go back to sleep! I dont like to ask hubby to do the night feeds as he has to get up for work next day. Last night she was up for feeds at 10.30, 01.30, 04.30 and 06.30. I know thats pretty normal for a newborn but i cant help wishing she would pick up a routine where she goes a bit longer at night! I find myself counting down the days till shes a month old where she may hopefully start to go through the night without too many feeds, is that terrible??

 

[Seity]

Hey Helabela - I hear you about getting a longer night's sleep with less feeds. I'm up till 1am (He cluster feeds from 9pm-1am), which is when my LO will finally settle for the night, then I'm up again at 4am, 7am, and 9am. It's so hard to get up at 4 and 7 when I'm so comfy in my bed. Plus my LO only fusses, not outright crying and so it's so tempting to try and roll over, but I know he needs changing badly and to feed again. I'm hoping to start expressing in the next few weeks, so at least my husband can take over some of the night time duties.

 

[angelstardust]

Another bad night last night x i would love to know why he keeps waking up!!! He goes to bed without a dummy so surely he cant be waking up in the middle of the night for that can he??
He woke around 2.30am last night & kept waking up until around 4.45am until in the end I was that tired I got him in to bed with me (DH had got up to go to work) and he slept soundly until 6.40am. This isnt something I do every night so he cant be waking for this either.
He is teething at the minute but he isnt waking up screaming (like when he teeths during the day)
I have tried leaving him to see if he will settle himself back & on the odd occasion he has but most of the time he just gets more worked up until he is crying.
His naps are all over the place in the day & hardly naps for more than 30 minutes at a time

anyone got any suggestions???

Have you tired a dummy?

Amber was bad for waking up and only settling when she came in beside me, I think it was to do with temperature, she woke just a little cold and would only fall back over snuggled into me once her body warmed up a bit. I could usually get her back into her own crib if I waited till she was warm, but I had swaddle her in blankets in the bed with me then pop her down. If she touched cold sheets she would wake back up.

I never felt comfortable having the boys in with me to sleep, but with Amber it was a case of I got more sleep (and better quality) by just going with it. After the first few nights it wasn't so scary.

Try and set a time for a nap for him, even if you just put him down in his crib to play for the first few times, sleep at day time really does help sleep at night time.

Where does he nap? Is he being distubed?

 

[Reedy]

Another bad night last night x i would love to know why he keeps waking up!!! He goes to bed without a dummy so surely he cant be waking up in the middle of the night for that can he??
He woke around 2.30am last night & kept waking up until around 4.45am until in the end I was that tired I got him in to bed with me (DH had got up to go to work) and he slept soundly until 6.40am. This isnt something I do every night so he cant be waking for this either.
He is teething at the minute but he isnt waking up screaming (like when he teeths during the day)
I have tried leaving him to see if he will settle himself back & on the odd occasion he has but most of the time he just gets more worked up until he is crying.
His naps are all over the place in the day & hardly naps for more than 30 minutes at a time

anyone got any suggestions???

Have you tired a dummy?

Amber was bad for waking up and only settling when she came in beside me, I think it was to do with temperature, she woke just a little cold and would only fall back over snuggled into me once her body warmed up a bit. I could usually get her back into her own crib if I waited till she was warm, but I had swaddle her in blankets in the bed with me then pop her down. If she touched cold sheets she would wake back up.

I never felt comfortable having the boys in with me to sleep, but with Amber it was a case of I got more sleep (and better quality) by just going with it. After the first few nights it wasn't so scary.

Try and set a time for a nap for him, even if you just put him down in his crib to play for the first few times, sleep at day time really does help sleep at night time.

Where does he nap? Is he being distubed?

He does have a dummy but cries everytime it falls out I will try putting a cover on him tonight when he wakes see if that helps although we have the heating come on during the night so it is quite warm already.
He sleeps in his cot during the day so its quieter than downstairs but his room at the front of the house so he does get a lot noise from people outside during the day especially the idiot across the road who finds it perfectly ok to leave his diesel van's engine running for 10-15 minutes at a time

Last night was really bad i think i've only had 4 hours sleep the rest was broken sleep every 10 or so minutes until he woke at 6am.