Sneaking back in...

[BelleNuit]

Hey ladies, I need to take another hiatus from this site for awhile to clear my head. I may pop in from time to time and I doubt my leave will last forever. Just need to take a break. This is all becoming too much again.

 

[WishnandHopn]

I hope the break does you good Belle. It can definitely all get to be too much. Wishing you loads of sticky baby dust. Enjoy your puppy and your trip!

How's everyone else doing? I think today is O day. I got my positive OPK yesterday on cd16, we BD'd on cd15 and will go again tonight. I have my post-op follow-up appt in 2 days...will have to confess we didn't wait 2 full weeks after surgery to have sex!

 

[MKaykes]

Belle - totally get it. Enjoy your trip and pup and some time away!

I kept checking OPK and got another + yesterday and today which makes more sense to me than yesterday. I had some sharp pelvic pain intermittently today. I've never noticed O pain before, don't know of that was what that was or I'm never sure when I get cramping in the abdomen or pelvic area if it is GI or reproductive related. Assuming the + was correct we've timed things well (even if O was last week). Based on previous cycles this week is more likely, once temp rises, I'll start the progesterone again.

 

[MKaykes]

Just checking in to see how everyone is doing! I'm just chilling in the TWW hoping for the best, but prepared to call the doctor to get IUI started in Nov. I guess it just had gotten easier to expect a BFN rather than be too devastated...

 

[WishnandHopn]

MK, I'm also 3 dpo today so we can wait it out together! I really hope this is your month and you won't even need that IUI.

I had my post-op appt yesterday. The pathology report on the polyp isn't back yet. DH's repeat semen analysis was a little better on count and volume (17 mil/ml, 4 mL) but a little worse on motility (25%). The doctor didn't have much to say about what could be causing this or how to improve it, so we asked for a second opinion and got a referral to a urologist, appt is next week! The doctor said that since I got pregnant before, now that the polyp is out we could try on our own for 4-5 months before moving to medicated IUI. So that's the plan for now...but I think we will reassess after 3 months. I'm not getting any younger! 38 next week...some people become grandmas at my age!

 

[2ducks]

Hey ladies!

I was just catching up a little on the thread. I hope to see some more BFPS here very soon. I'm hanging in there. 18 weeks on Monday, continuing to pray that my little miracle continues to grow!

I have a handful of OPKs (some ICS and CBD) that will expire way before I will give birth or be ready to start trying again. If someone state side wants to claim them just PM me your address.

 

[MKaykes]

Hi 2ducks! Good to hear from you, I see you're having a boy! How great (though the same would be said if you were having a girl, lol)! I think both are fun.

I may check in with you in a couple weeks about those OPKs if I'm still using them in the coming months. If someone snags them earlier no big deal, how nice of you to pass them along.

 

[BelleNuit]

Wishn thats really good to hear about the referral to the urologist! If its a motility issue then I'll bet IUI does the trick for you right away if you do end up having to get to that point. I'm glad the doc gave you the go ahead to try on your own for another 5 months before starting IUI thats pretty similar to the timeline I've given myself.

Ducks good to hear from you again, glad everything is going well!

MK I know what you mean that you just expect it to be a BFN. This was the first cycle where I really have just given up hope. I didn't even bother hoping or wishing for it. I feel like that BFN is inevitable. That being said, I do still hope for you and that you will get lucky, and if you end up having to go the route of IUIs then I hope you'll get quick success with that. I'm trying to prepare myself mentally for eventually needing IUI so having you lay the groundwork for me will actually be really helpful (if you end up needing it that is, FX that you don't!). I'm rooting for you every step of the way!

This week has been really tough on me. Between catching DH smoking weed again and having him lie to my face about it (how dumb does he think I am! I can fricken smell it!) and being in the last week of the TWW it's been alot. I've been pretty depressed and angry all week long. I started spotting today, right on time, so I know I'm out this cycle.

DH and I have been in screaming matches all week. Today I was finally able to have a calm conversation with him. I explained the plan.... start meds in january, IUI in June, IVF in January 2018, and then I explained the risks and the costs of all the procedures. I explained that IUI with injectibles has a higher success rate than IUI with femara, but that the risk of twins or triplets is also higher and that if we had triplets that he would be a full time stay at home parent (I earn over double what he does and have a professional license to maintain so its not an option for me). I also explained what happens with ovarian hyperstimulation and how it can be FATAL. But for whatever reason the fear of triplets seemed to do it for him and he's agreed to quit weed (again) starting now and that we will both renew our efforts for healthy living so that we can put our best foot forward in January when we start meds.

Cycle 15 here I come

 

[WishnandHopn]

Happy 18 weeks 2ducks! Glad to hear you are doing well.

Belle, I'm sorry about the spotting, and also the awful week you had! It sucks when you're pouring your heart and soul into something and it feels like your partner isn't taking it as seriously! I'm glad you were able to talk it through and come up with a plan.

How's your wait going MK? We're amost half way!

I'm 6 dpo...not feeling particularly hopeful about this cycle. I would be thrilled to conceive the same cycle as the surgery, but not expecting to at all. Our California trip fell through so instead we booked a trip to Paris! We leave next Wednesday! If no BFP at least I will be able to drown AF in French wine for a week...

 

[MKaykes]

Belle - sorry to hear about your rough time with DH. I really wish they could go through even half of what we do emotionally and physically through this process. Even if they want it equally as bad as we do, I don't think they realize that their choices also have equal impact on the success!

Wishn, I'd say a trip to Paris is a GREAT alternate to California! Have you been before? I went in high school and would love to go back some day. We'd always talked about heading to Europe before kids, but I went back to school instead, ha!

TWW is going well, and actually feeling pretty fast. I've been bad at following through with the progesterone twice a day...at least I've taken it at least once a day.

We went to a Halloween party Sat and I was annoyed to not be drinking "just in case." If I knew I was pregnant or wouldn't bother me, it'll just be annoying if I'm not. It seems to happen frequently that something fun comes up during that really fun 2 weeks! The next fun thing is in 2 weeks, so I'm hoping to then not be drinking because I get a BFP this weekend!

DH will be gone Sat overnight, so I'm going to test while he is gone 11 dpo, which is earlier than I normally would, but would love to surprise him!

 

[WishnandHopn]

I've never been to Paris and I'm super excited! I have to admit...for the first few months TTC I tried to avoid drinking at all in the tww, but lately my philosophy has been "drink till it's pink". Not that I would get drunk, but I really doubt a drink or two can hurt so early on. Plus I pretty much always assume I'm not pregnant.

MK, good luck with your testing on Saturday! I hope you do get to surprise DH!

I'm waiting to test till Tuesday at 14 dpo. Not sure what to do if BFN and still no AF by the time we leave Wednesday evening. I might have to bring hpts AND tampons on vacation!

 

[BelleNuit]

Wishn I hope you have a fab time in Paris!!

Officially CD 1 today.... on to cycle 15 :/ AF due Nov 27. This is my last cycle to complete 1 year of TTC #1. Good God I hope it doesn't take another year. I had an angry week all leading up to AF, but I just feel numb now and I'm thankful for that..

 

[MissDoc]

MK, I'll be crossing my fingers for you that testing on Saturday is FANTASTIC.

Wishn, oh boy I'm jealous of your trip. Paris! That sounds wonderful, and I hope you have reasons to use those HPTs on your trip. I also think drink til it's pink is reasonable. The baby isn't even sharing your blood supply for the first bit. The night before my BFP I had a moscow mule. Lol.

Belle, I'm so sorry for everything-- the rough week you've had, the going into the 15th cycle, the darned hubby needing major intervention to get on track. All of it. I so hope that you get your bfp in the near future and this can be a crappy memory that was just part of the road to your baby.

 

[BelleNuit]

Thanks Doc, I hope it happens soon as well. Things just get more complicated treatment wise after the first year. We will hold out naturally for 3 more cycles then do 3 cycles of femara before moving on to IUI.

 

[WishnandHopn]

Belle, the one year mark will be a tough milestone, here's hoping you don't even get there and get a BFP instead! We will hit the one year ttc mark around Christmas. Joy to the world, indeed.

Doc, I see you're having a BOY! How exciting!

 

[MKaykes]

So yesterday I as symptom spotting at 7 dpo, was nauseous and SUPER tired despite nearly 8 hours of sleep. Tried to convince myself it was to early. Now today, I've got AF cramps (which is just low back pain for me) so who knows what's going on!

Belle - are you in your new place now with the new puppy?

 

[BelleNuit]

MK that last week before AF shows is the WORST!! I hope your "AF cramps" are actually just implantation cramps!

We don't move until Nov 14, so puppy won't move in with us until then. I'm getting really excited though! We'll be heading to Boston on Tuesday so that will keep us busy till then!

 

[WishnandHopn]

MK I remember the cycle i got pregnant I had what felt like light AF cramps starting around 8 dpo and I was really annoyed thinking the witch was going to come early! I hope it's implantation cramps for you!

Belle I love the running puppy in your signature!

I'm 10 dpo today...trying not to symptom spot but I woke up feeling warm yesterday and have had heartburn the last 2 nights while i was trying to fall asleep. It's my birthday today and DH surprised me by making breakfast for me! I might test tomorrow morning since we're going out for dinner and drinks with friends that night.

 

[MKaykes]

Happy Birthday Wishn!! How nice of DH to make you breakfast 😊

I'm also 10 DPO, I'm going to try to hold out until Sun morning to test. As of now, I'm hoping for a BFP but preparing myself for a BFN. No more symptoms here...

Why do AF symptoms have to mimic Pg symptoms or vice versa??

Belle, do you have specific plans on what to do/see in Boston?

Wishn, if you get a chance to get out of Paris for a day trip (not sure how long you're going for) Mont St. Michel is worth it! If that is too far, definitely I'd recommend Versailles. Granted, it's been over 15 years since I was in France, but it was amazing! We spent a week touring the NW before a family stay and ended in Paris. Paris was actually my least favorite of what we did/saw but only because the smaller towns are so great. I'd go back to Paris in a heartbeat! I'm so jealous 😄. Hopefully you can celebrate a BFP!

 

[BelleNuit]

Happy Birthday Wishn! What a sweet surprise from DH! I went to Paris once as a teen and again in my early 20s. I absolutely loved it and was surprised how at home I felt there! I would LOVE to go back and tour DH all around!

Good for you MK for holding out to test. Its always so hard those last few days of the TWW. I know its hard to hope for a BFP anymore, but its just as hard to try to accept that BFN as well. That being said I do have high hopes for you this month, and no symptoms can be a good thing!

MK with packing for the move I haven't had too much time to think about Boston, but holy man Tuesday is coming fast!!! I really will only have 2 and a half days there so I have to be somewhat selective. I was thinking about doing one of those hop on hop off tours so I can get a good look around the city and catch all the highlights. If the weather cooperates I'd like to walk the Freedom Trail. Getting excited!

And my goodness when we get back it'll be a mad scramble to move!

Today is CD 3 and I had a sudden urge to go fill my femara prescription and start taking it, but with how crazy busy this month is already, I don't think I need to add femara to the mix lol. Plus then I'd be worrying about remembering to take femara while on vacation. Screw that!

I've been having lots of pregnancy/baby dreams lately, so its obviously been on my mind. Yesterday I dreamed my friends baby peed in my mouth (it was like a baby was giving me the middle finger, UGH!), last night I dreamed about being pregnant and then dreamed about having 2 teenage boys. I'd really love a pair of boys, but I'd also really love a boy and a girl too. I'd even really love it if I could just have one child! This whole process has made me rethink if I even want a second, its so damn hard I'm not sure I could put myself through it again.