So scared.

[lanaross]

Just sending you hugs hun x can you seek other opinion? don't give up.

 

[bdb84]

I just caught up and I am devastated for you. Little Phoebe is proving to be a warrior, and I just know she will be fine in the long run.

Normally I'm not a litigious person, but in your situation, I believe you have high grounds for legal action. The care you received was atrocious at best. All of this could have, and should have, been prevented had the medical personnel just listened.

 

[Kiwiberry]

I just caught up and I am devastated for you. Little Phoebe is proving to be a warrior, and I just know she will be fine in the long run.

Normally I'm not a litigious person, but in your situation, I believe you have high grounds for legal action. The care you received was atrocious at best. All of this could have, and should have, been prevented had the medical personnel just listened.

I agree completely.

 

[lj2245]

Yep. They postponed my section several times and I begged them to just take me but they refused. I even sent my husband a message at 2am begging him to come and take me to a different hospital.

I saw the registrar responsible for it all 5 minutes after we got the news about the MRI and it was only because my 3 children were present that I didn't chase after her. I don't know what I'd have said :/

 

[SoBlessedMama]

That all just blows my mind and shatters my heart for you. I am so, so sorry. You have some superpower restraint to not have decked that registrar the second you saw her. You have three precious kids, and you don't deserve to be facing any of these obstacles that have been solely caused by incompetence. You're so strong, Mama. Praying for you!!

 

[lj2245]

That all just blows my mind and shatters my heart for you. I am so, so sorry. You have some superpower restraint to not have decked that registrar the second you saw her. You have three precious kids, and you don't deserve to be facing any of these obstacles that have been solely caused by incompetence. You're so strong, Mama. Praying for you!!

It was strange because it was the first time I'd seen her since but for some reason I'd managed to convince myself that she'd have to have been at least suspended because of what happened. I was so shocked to see her there that all I could do was burst into tears. I'm so angry at her. My baby girl effectively died because of her and it was only because of the Intervention of a consultant who came in from his bed that she was able to be resuscitated. Her consultant told us when he was giving the mri results that most wouldn't have survived it and the fact she came back to us at all is a miracle so we should be amazed that she's doing so well after only 2 weeks. The girl astounds me every day. I'm completely in awe of her.

 

[vermeil]

Juste wanted to say I've been thinking of you and beautiful Phoebe a lot these past few days. What an amazing little girl she is. I remember all too well the hopelessness I felt when I received my son's prognosis. And here I am with a healthy son.

Please try to do skin to skin kangaroo care as much as you can. When I was finally able to hold my son (at 22 days) I did so for hours every day. His oxygen requirements dropped from their steady 65+ % to a much lower 30% within a few days,and his general state improved. I am convinced it really helped.we're social creatures, those cuddles do wonders.

Try to document everything that happened and yes I also think I would clock that woman, christmas day or no.. . I'm sooo angry for you.

*hugs* I was told my son would need a walker to get around because of confirmed brain damage and he's a 4 year old monkey now, climbs everything in sight!

Merry Christmas to you and your loved ones

 

[lj2245]

I'm glad your boy is doing well I'm hopefull that she will have a good quality of life but to be perfectly 'normal' is something we have been warned against hoping for :/

Physically Phoebe is continuing to do amazing things. She was on 2 suck feeds to 1 NGT feed as of christmas eve and her consultant allowed her to come home for a couple of hours yesterday.

We eturned her at 3pm yesterday and she had a tube feed. We just phoned and she's had a suck feed every 3 hours since 3pm yesterday. I'm thinking she might be coming home for good soon!

Here's my little Xmas Cracker

 

[SoBlessedMama]

She is SO sweet!!!!! I'm excited for you to be able to have her home--like Vermeil said, we are social, and need that contact. I imagine giving her loves and cuddles will be infinitely easier in her new home as opposed to a hospital. It is so great to hear her good feeding updates!

 

[Tasha]

I'm so sorry that you were given such bad news, I know Phoebe will continue to astound you.

I've had two daughters die from medical negligence and even now (seven years and three years) I hate the people responsible.

Once Phoebe is home and settled perhaps pop to your GP and ask for counselling. I know lots of people don't like the idea but I think it's important to acknowledge that you've been through a horrific time and talk about it.

 

[lj2245]

I'm so sorry that you were given such bad news, I know Phoebe will continue to astound you.

I've had two daughters die from medical negligence and even now (seven years and three years) I hate the people responsible.

Once Phoebe is home and settled perhaps pop to your GP and ask for counselling. I know lots of people don't like the idea but I think it's important to acknowledge that you've been through a horrific time and talk about it.

Good god that's horrific you must be a pretty amazing person just to find the strength to get through each day never mind coming on here and helping so many other ladies. I think you're made of the same kind of special stuff I see in Phoebe

 

[Tasha]

That is such a lovely thing to say, thank you. You're doing amazingly too (I know it won't feel it), Phoebe has to get it from some where

I didn't tell you for any other reason than to let you know the anger and hatred is normal. You're not alone. Keep talking to us xx

 

[lj2245]

That is such a lovely thing to say, thank you. You're doing amazingly too (I know it won't feel it), Phoebe has to get it from some where

I didn't tell you for any other reason than to let you know the anger and hatred is normal. You're not alone. Keep talking to us xx

I know I won't ever stop feeling the anger I feel towards the medical staff responsible. It's so unfair and it was all so preventable. No one had to do anything difficult, they just had to listen to me and act upon what I was telling them. I will make sure they pay for what they have done to my girl and aren't able to make the same mistakes with another precious life.

I can't bear the thought that my girls life has been changed. I can't bear the thought of her lying dead for 20 minutes before the consultant arrived and intervened. I can't bear the thought of her tiny body being battered and bruised as she was given cpr. Mostly I can't bear the thought that she has suffered and may continue to suffer. She was supposed to be safe.

At the same time I'm so aware of how lucky we are that she's alive. I'll never forget how I felt when I thought she was dead and the elation I felt when I was told they'd got her heartrate back. I am so so lucky.

I don't want her growing up with me bitter and angry. I need to either get over it or bury how I feel. I don't want her thinking I'm angry about who she is, whoever that may be. I love my babies more than life. All I want is their happiness.

What a rollercoaster eh :/

 

[Tasha]

It's quite often the case in situations similar to this, that they just needed to listen to mum and her instincts. I hate that often they think they know better than us because of the qualifications but no one knows our bodies (or babies) better than us.

I will reply a longer reply tomorrow but needed to say before bed that you absolutely can not bury the feelings, for a while maybe, but eventually it will come back to bite you on the bum. Take it from me the wife of someone who didn't work through his anger and upset and the consequences of that were awful and almost life changing for the whole family. You love your babies with everything you have, that's obvious, so if you don't work through for you, do it for them. They need you at your best and you can't be if there is so much left unsaid.

 

[SoBlessedMama]

Well said, Tasha. You and Lj both are amazingly strong women.

 

[lj2245]

Phoebe pulled her feeding tube out 72 hours ago and has had suck feeds since. Waiting to find out if she can be discharged today

 

[Tasha]

Fingers crossed for you x

 

[SoBlessedMama]

That's great, Lj!!!! I hope your sweet girl gets to come home today!

 

[lj2245]

She's getting home today

 

[SoBlessedMama]

How wonderful!!!!!!! Enjoy your first day at home as a complete family. : )