So Upset!!! Midwife just called me stupid!!!

[Amelia Pond]

ignore her and request a new MW hunni, my last ws a 10lb 12oz baby with no complications and im having this baby at home, the "risk" of shoulder dystocia is no higher with a larger baby if the mother doesnt have GD
check this site https://www.bigbaby.org.uk/ and with a big baby its even more important that the mother is as comfortable in her surroundings as possible to make the birth as easy as possible. sounds like your MW is just not very supportive of Homebirths at all so you would want a new one anyway before it got to time for having the baby,

This baby measured on the 75Centile at our growth scan so im expecting at 9lber roughly but i know that can be out by 30% so im fully expecting a larger baby than that even though my bump looks small and measures on dates my last one did too lol

Thanks, I will definitely check out that site....I don't have GD, don't really have any other health worries that could complicate the birth either....and I assumed being at home, relaxed would make it more easy....keep questioning myself now

 

[Dannieo]

You poor thing, It's your birth, your choice!

Sounds to me like she thinks she's doing you a favour by being involved in your pregnancy. It's shameful when they loose sight of what really matters.

I swear some are like mini Nazis, and think you should have the birth THEY think is right.

If no one rings back, call and leave another message. I've become an expert complainer since I've been pregnant. Chase it until someone rings you back.

I hope they switch you off of her service! xxx

 

[luckyno2]

WHAT ????????? report her ....

 

[LouLou78]

Thats awful to hear hun, nasty midwives like that give the profession a bad name, makes me mad when majority are so so nice. Like the others have said, she shouldn't have knowledge of the gender as midwives are not told nor is it important for a midwife to know at all. Its not like the sonographers have contact with the community midwives either.

My sonographer was actually one of the community midwives, obviously she has the training.....

So your songrapher that actually did your scan is one of the community midwives now? So was your scan in the community then? She is naughty passing on that information or even discussing it.

 

[Amelia Pond]

Thats awful to hear hun, nasty midwives like that give the profession a bad name, makes me mad when majority are so so nice. Like the others have said, she shouldn't have knowledge of the gender as midwives are not told nor is it important for a midwife to know at all. Its not like the sonographers have contact with the community midwives either.

My sonographer was actually one of the community midwives, obviously she has the training.....

So your songrapher that actually did your scan is one of the community midwives now? So was your scan in the community then? She is naughty passing on that information or even discussing it.

It is a small group of midwives and one of them does the scanning.... I am not sure if she told my midwife or how my midwife knows it is a boy, I am really confused...don't know what to think!

 

[LouLou78]

Oh dear, sounds like the 'need to know' rule went out the window and they simply forgot to mention to each other that you actually don't wish to know what your having either, so she stuck her foot in it there by revealing it. I would hate the thought of anyone knowing what I was having behind our backs 'so to speak'.

 

[LittleBoo]

Aside from the complete unprofessional way she spoke to you, let me assure you it is NOT guaranteed a boy will weigh more, my first son was just under 8lb whereas my second as 6lb 10oz, and my second came a day later than my first.

 

[LouLou78]

So true LittleBoo!

 

[Miss Duke]

My ds weighed less than my dd. I am truly shocked at what I have read here! Hope ur ok xx

 

[SpunkyMunkey]

Even if it is another boy, that doesn't automatically make him bigger! My oldest brother was 10 lbs 3 oz when he was born, my other brother was just over 6 lbs when he was born! And my mother didn't have GD or anything with my first brother. He was just huge! And then both my sister and I were around 8 lbs.

 

[Amelia Pond]

My ds weighed less than my dd. I am truly shocked at what I have read here! Hope ur ok xx

Truthfully, I am still really upset. I don't think I want a home birth anymore and I can't stop thinking of all the things that could go wrong

 

[lynnikins]

hun wonder into the home and natural birthing section the girls there are really experienced and have the figures that prove that your MW was talking bull

 

[ljo1984]

^wss. Xx

 

[poppytal pope]

very very un professional , i would really make a fuss over this one and transfer, that is beyond belief, she had no right to tell you what sex the baby is or call you stupid a home birth isnt a stupid idea at all especially as this isnt your first birth , how dare she what a witch, if it was a bad idea she should have explained professionally to you the risk involving "your" birth plan not shoot you down in flames. you do need to complain because some other poor soul could be at the hands of her next time and may not have the strentgh of character to complain, and i think a lot of pregnant woman suffer at the hands of some ignorant mid wives and employers and the more we put up with it the more bad practice will happen. dont let it get the better of you construct a letter and you want to know the out come as well .

 

[Amelia Pond]

hun wonder into the home and natural birthing section the girls there are really experienced and have the figures that prove that your MW was talking bull

Thanks, I didn't think of posting there....would be good to get an idea if others had home births with subsequent pregnancies as my midwife also made a big deal of the fact that this is my fourth pregnancy it makes my birth 'high risk'......

 

[Amelia Pond]

very very un professional , i would really make a fuss over this one and transfer, that is beyond belief, she had no right to tell you what sex the baby is or call you stupid a home birth isnt a stupid idea at all especially as this isnt your first birth , how dare she what a witch, if it was a bad idea she should have explained professionally to you the risk involving "your" birth plan not shoot you down in flames. you do need to complain because some other poor soul could be at the hands of her next time and may not have the strentgh of character to complain, and i think a lot of pregnant woman suffer at the hands of some ignorant mid wives and employers and the more we put up with it the more bad practice will happen. dont let it get the better of you construct a letter and you want to know the out come as well .

I intend to complain...ALOT! I am trying to set up a meeting with the consultant midwife for the area and will change my midwife ASAP to someone more supportive....but I do have to admit that she has placed doubts in my head now. I want to do what is best for my baby and I feel really muddled at the moment.

 

[ljo1984]

hun wonder into the home and natural birthing section the girls there are really experienced and have the figures that prove that your MW was talking bull

Thanks, I didn't think of posting there....would be good to get an idea if others had home births with subsequent pregnancies as my midwife also made a big deal of the fact that this is my fourth pregnancy it makes my birth 'high risk'......

is she old? think she needs to retire if so ha ha.