Soon to be 34 and feeling pressured, anyone else?!?!

[inpghttc]

Hello all...I am going to be 34 in Septmeber and was wondering if anyone else is in the same boat and may be having feelings like I am having. I just (today) got my first AF after stopping the pill and am planning on TTC this cycle. I am feeling a slight rushed against time to get my BFP before November and here is why... I used to think that I had until I was 35 to get pregnant without being considered high risk. I just recently found out that the magic age of 35 is the age in which the baby is born, NOT the age in which you conceive. So, for me to deliver at age 34, I need to conceive by around November/December of 2011. Now, I am fully aware that many people have babies after the age of 35 and everything ends up being totally fine...I just guess that wanting to beat the "high risk pregnancy" status has me feeling a little nervous and pressured and was wanted to bring it up here to see if I am alone with the feeling or if anyone else feels the same way?

 

[Ambree]

Well I am your age also, except I turn 34 in March
I did not start to really want a baby until last year
and have been off the pill since July 2010.
But I was on it for so long!!!
And I was so ignorant of my own biology ...
anyway so here we are at 5 or 6 dpo and hoping for a BFP.
This is my fourth attempt.

Every time I get a BFN I feel like I have failed somehow or that I must be starting menopause
melodramatic hormones lol


My sister went off the pill at 34 and one or two or cycles later she was BFP. She will have her first baby next month at 35

 

[inpghttc]

Thanks Ambree! I feel the same way! Let's keep in touch and update each other throughout this journey!

 

[Kaleido]

Hi, im 33 as well and this is my first month ttc.....and god do I feel under tremendous pressure to have babies NOW! Its like my brain suddenly clicked and I did the math....and that houseful of children seemed like only wishful thinking. The love of my life and I found each other late, and I also own a skill related business that I work alone in(and make more$ ) so the timing was never right for me, even tho I've always wanted to be a mom. But now that we have decided to do it im soo impatient!

 

[Ambree]

For sure
better to write about it than incessantly crawl through the internet seeking matching symptoms

This time around I don't have much appetite and I have slight flu like symptoms -
but I'm under more pressure than usual and it's winter here so I sinus and glands is hardly remarkable.

My close friend is also pregnant (34) and she is due one month after my sister. My cousin (37) is having her first baby around the same time.
So I guess its babymania.
It seems everyone is having babies
or rather -
everyone CAN have babies
except for me.

Have you noticed a change in your cycles the past few years?
In my 20s my cycles were clockwork 27 or 28,
since trying from October 2010 my cycles have been 25 or 26 days and twice they were 35.
So of course to me that means I am approaching menopause.
I told my doctor this and he just laughed and told me not to be ridiculous.
lol

 

[Ambree]

Hi, im 33 as well and this is my first month ttc.....and god do I feel under tremendous pressure to have babies NOW! Its like my brain suddenly clicked and I did the math....and that houseful of children seemed like only wishful thinking. The love of my life and I found each other late, and I also own a skill related business that I work alone in(and make more$ ) so the timing was never right for me, even tho I've always wanted to be a mom. But now that we have decided to do it im soo impatient!

Exactly!!!
I really don't know what I was thinking before ttc, I guess my motherhood switch was dormant
until it was suddenly - ON.
And I realised that I really wanted a baby
and worse that I may run out of time.

 

[inpghttc]

I also was like a switch going from not even slighly considering it to ON!!! It's like our biological clock is finally talking to us!

 

[GirlBlue]

Hi ladies,

You all have read my mind. DH and I have been married 5 years and we are both 32. Now that I am seeing my big family multiple children dream seem more and more dreamlike, I am crazy. I have put it off so long and, now that my cycles are starting to change, I'm getting worried. (They were 28 now they're 24-30). (My sister is starting menopause at 38, which is also freaking me out) Plus, I have a lot of pressure from family, friends, and just the good old green monster as I watch others jump into it. DH used to drive me mad pointing out couples who appeared to be 40+ with toddlers as examples of how waiting was not all bad. I couldn't help but think what they might have had to do to their bodies, or the agony of the wait they endured. I don't know if fear is the best motivation, but it's working on me right now...lol

 

[NellieRae]

Fear of still trying to start or complete our family at an *advanced* maternal age is driving me now, as well. I am worried that we'll run out of time or that my fertility isn't what I need....or something. I don't want to be an old parent, unable to keep up with my children or maybe not around for theirs.

Lots of women our age have healthy pregnancies easily - others have to jump through hoops of agony & tears first. Its the fear of the unknown + the possibility of never having something I want so VERY much. I'm not sure how far I would be willing to go if it doesn't happen like I always dreamed it would.

 

[aleja]

hello there, i am a newbie. this is my first post ever! i decided to join after a few weeks of stalking bnb! i too am 33 and feeling the pressure. it feels like everywhere i look friends, family, colleagues are all falling pregnant and having babies. i can't help think i have missed the boat. we been trying for 4 months and it already feels like an eternity.
its great to know i am not the only one and its been inspiring to hear so many similar stories to mine x

 

[Mazzy17]

Hi Ladies

Good luck

 

[letdoit]

Hi all, this is my first post as I joined today!

I am 31 this August and also feeling under a lot of pressure to get pregnant. My 1st daughter is 12yrs , so now hoping for number 2. My OH wants a boy,,,,,,! I have read lots of info about TTC a boy. Not sure how possible it is with Artificial insemination?

Will keep you udated!

Guk luck to you all ladies.

 

[karine]

Hi, I've been stalking B&B for a while now.. just had to reply this time because I'll be 34 in September as well and the pressure is on! It doesn't help that everyone around me is getting pregnant on their first and second months trying and I'm currently on my 3rd and not getting the feeling this is my month

I know I'm supposed to relax and not be so frantic about it all but I can't help it! Great to know there are others like me tho

 

[inpghttc]

Karine, what day in September? I'm the 11th! Good luck to you!

 

[PositiveUs]

Listen people, I am 38 and 1/2 trying for my first (late bloomer). I have the highest hopes. My cousin conceived last year naturally at age 42 after 11 months of trying.
It is possible!!!
I am on Day 13.
Got my first +OPK yesterday, day 12 and +OPK today, day 13.
BD day 8, 10, 11 and 12 so far. Guess the plan is to BD tonight to hopefully seal the deal.
I have taken prenatal vitamins for 10 years, I take primrose day 4 til O. Sometimes use preseed but haven't really needed it.
This is technically my first month ttc with fiance, last month he had no idea what I was trying to do!
I suggest changing passwords to positive pregnancy symbols/words, drawing pictures/paintings of the pregnancy or finding pics and putting them around you at home or work (sperm meets egg), practicing visualization of your dream every day and being grateful for what you do have right now.
Good luck to everyone!

 

[Ambree]

I keep visualising a BFP, does that count?

I'm 7 dpo today (if my luteal phase is 15 or 16)
and trying to be as positive as possible...

inpghttc, I read your post about a very light AF, I once had a very early AF that was not very heavy, the research i read at the time suggested that it was the timing of AF that was more important than actual blood flow.
Ie if your AF arrives within a time frame so that the luteal phase is too short.
(Happened to me during a very stressful overseas trip).

 

[Ambree]

Hi all, this is my first post as I joined today!

I am 31 this August and also feeling under a lot of pressure to get pregnant. My 1st daughter is 12yrs , so now hoping for number 2. My OH wants a boy,,,,,,! I have read lots of info about TTC a boy. Not sure how possible it is with Artificial insemination?

Will keep you udated!

Guk luck to you all ladies.

Im not sure if it is the same with people as it is with horses and dogs lol -
but it is better to breed once while younger and then ttc when older,
than to ttc older for the first time

I dont know much about AI, my aunty had her frist baby at 47 through IVF
but it was through a donor egg, after several unsuccessful attempts with her own.
They now have a beautiful baby boy, who looks exactly like the dad!

I hope you have the beautiful baby boy you and your OH are dreaming of,
best wishes

 

[christine7611]

Wow, I could have written most of these posts myself!! I will be 35 in December and just ended our 2nd cycle of ttc. And I want more than one kiddo before 40 ideally. The pressure is INTENSE!!! And I know what you all mean about it feeling like everyone else you know is getting pregnant easily. I didn't meet DH until I was 29. I wish now that we had started trying a few years ago, but there was always a good reason to wait. Now I'm just hoping and praying that we didn't wait too long and that we'll be successful soon. I keep thinking I should venture over to the ttc over 35 board, but it scares me too much I know people get pregnant after 35 all the time, but the time pressure does seem lots different that it would have if I had started younger. Oh, well, c'est la vie, I guess. Sending lots of baby dust out to all of you!!!

 

[aleja]

Wow, I could have written most of these posts myself!! I will be 35 in December and just ended our 2nd cycle of ttc. And I want more than one kiddo before 40 ideally. The pressure is INTENSE!!! And I know what you all mean about it feeling like everyone else you know is getting pregnant easily. I didn't meet DH until I was 29. I wish now that we had started trying a few years ago, but there was always a good reason to wait. Now I'm just hoping and praying that we didn't wait too long and that we'll be successful soon. I keep thinking I should venture over to the ttc over 35 board, but it scares me too much I know people get pregnant after 35 all the time, but the time pressure does seem lots different that it would have if I had started younger. Oh, well, c'est la vie, I guess. Sending lots of baby dust out to all of you!!!

hey there, same story here i wish we hadn't waited so long we have been together for 9+ years but we always had an excuse, money, travel, career, house etc etc etc . if i had know it was going be this hard i would have started trying long time ago. good luck to you

 

[aleja]

Hi, I've been stalking B&B for a while now.. just had to reply this time because I'll be 34 in September as well and the pressure is on! It doesn't help that everyone around me is getting pregnant on their first and second months trying and I'm currently on my 3rd and not getting the feeling this is my month

I know I'm supposed to relax and not be so frantic about it all but I can't help it! Great to know there are others like me tho

hi karine, i know what you mean a few of my close friends all fell preggers within a couple of months of ttc and they will all be first time mums very soon. i am so happy for all of them but can't help feeling a bit sad and envious sometimes. best wishes to u and everyone else