wantababybump
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- Feb 25, 2008
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Well tomorrow I will be on cd59...one day away from being 2 full months since my lasy af. Im starting to get sick and tired of this crap. I have spotted 1 day about 5 different times this cycle and my temps are still low and actually are all over the place. I just dont know what to do. I got that faint bfp but have pretty much put it off to being an evap. Did a CB digi and it was "not pregnant". I havent taken anything lately as Im soooo scared it will just be negative anyways and I dont want to waste a bunch of money on tests if they will only be negative. I cant order any off of ebay because I am in Canada and takes a little over 2 wks for them to actually get here. Im starting to get tired of this...I just want af to come so I can start a brand new cycle and it just keeps effing with me by making me spot and think I am going to actually start and then goes away and nothing else happens! I think the worst thing is not knowing if there is something wrong with me...if there is a reason that my cycles are so long...they never used to be and this is the longest cycle so far (longest previous was 46 days)...I dont know what to do I just cant deal with this! People say "why dont you go back on the pill for a year and regulate your cycles"...I dont want to that is the total opposite of what I want to do...Im trying to get pregnant not prevent it!! Another annoying one is "stop stressing, you'll never get pregnant that way" how the heck can I not stress when Im waiting for my period to come and it never does...and I have no sweet clue when it will start in return making me stress because I have gone almost 2 months since my last period!! Oh and I also hate..."just stop trying, thats what we did" I really dont give 2 shits if thats what you did. I cant stop trying...I probbly could if I didnt have such messed up cycles but there could actually be something wrong with me that is preventing me from getting pregnant (like the fact I dont ovulate at the same time every month) so I cant just not try or I may actually never find out what is wrong with me and will never end up getting pregnant. Frig...I just cant deal with this crap anymore!! Im annoyed..sorry for the rant.