Struggling with female factor infertility

[Christi85]

Here I am for an update!

First of all, the time is nearly here for my trip, leaving on 9/30 and will be gone for a little over a month. Can't wait For now I'm just tying off some loose ends, but I'm already mentally checked out from work and such

I'm on CD15 today on my 1st post D&C cycle and waiting to ovulate any day now. My CM picked up a lot yesterday, although I feel kinda drier so far today, but we will see. I'm still following my ovulation, even though we won't be trying again until my November cycle (3rd cycle post D&C) or even my December cycle (4th cycle post D&C), depending on how strong my body feels by that time. I'm using the saliva ovulation test and for those not familiar with those, it displays 3 saliva patterns: non fertile, transitional towards most fertile, and most fertile. Yesterday (CD14) I got the transitional pattern for the first time and today (CD15) it as still transitional but stronger than yesterday's. So hopefully, I'll be getting a 'most fertile' pattern in 1-2 days' time. My first post D&C period wasn't as bad as I was fearing - cramping was light to none thanks to acupuncture, and bleeding amount was exactly the same as my normal bleeding, only more 'runny' the first 2 days. I had 6 days of full blown bleeding, but then I had 2 days of brown spotting and another 3 days of very light discharge-spotting until it stopped completely after CD11. My normal periods last 6-7 days with the last day or two being just brown spotting, and then it stops, so this one was definitely longer. I attribute it to it being the first post D&C cycle, which everyone says can be a little (or a lot) crazy, and not worrying too much about it. They also say it is possible that ovulation doesn't happen on that first cycle, but I hope this is not the case with me. I'm eager to see my body fully back on track So far so good...

In other news, I met with my step mother-in-law this past weekend. She was in LA and practices various aspects of Chinese medicine in San Diego, so it was a good opportunity to meet with her since she was in town. After a long 'consultation', her conclusion was that I have a very strong yang and quite a weak yin, so we need to balance those out better. She thinks this is causing my hormonal imbalance. In a nutshell, I'm using up too much of my body's energy (both physically and mentally/emotionally) without giving it back enough. It doesn't help that I am very petite with not much fat to 'sustain' me (I'm 5'2" with a weight of between 104-109, so quite little and my BMI always falls within the low normal), but since this is my 'constitution' we shouldn't try to change that. She thinks I need to focus on sustenance, and mental and physical rest for now. In other words, sleep well (not always possible for me ), eat a balanced diet with emphasis on nutrition (I'd been doing that but I've increased my food consumption throughout the day - with good healthy food always, nothing junk and surprisingly, with just 3 days of doing this I feel much less tired throughout the day ), and as little stress as possible, doing things that I enjoy and make me happy etc. Oh, and not being too harsh on myself, which can be a challenge She also told me to keep taking my multivitamin, as well as 20ml/day of Floradix iron (liquid, highly absorbable iron) for 3 months, as I looked quite pale to her (the multivitamin I take though contains 30mg/iron, so not sure I need Floradix), and to pick either cod liver oil or evening primrose for my daily omega 3 supplementation. I'm leaning towards evening primrose, since it's easier on the stomach and has mild hormone balancing effects as well. Interestingly, she was against me taking everything else my acupuncturist had given me - such as the L-Arginine, CoQ10, chlorofyll complex, flaxseed oil etc. etc. since she said all this actually puts my body/liver to too much work, which is the opposite of what we want to achieve at this point. We want more energy to get into my body as opposed to it going out too much, and we don't want my organs to work too hard for no real reason, as this also makes the body go 'hyper' and could even be affecting my sleep (which is often disrupted). Interesting views, but they do make sense to me. So I thought I'd follow her advice. I asked her about the CoQ10 and she thinks I don't need it and if I'm concerned with the quality of my eggs (mainly because of my low AMH), I should make sure I eat foods with zinc such as sea food. I checked and my vitamin contains zinc to cover 100% of my daily need, so that together with zinc-rich foods should be enough. She said for now I need to focus on nourishing and resting 'my body and soul' in order to fully heal and be strong to support a future pregnancy. After I start feeling better, she can also give me some custom herbs, but for now she didn't want to give me anything extra until I feel 'stronger'. She said my acupuncturist (who is not oriental) is following a set protocol that many in the industry follow and prescribe, but she felt I may be needing something slightly different - different combinations of herbs and such, as opposed to a standardized protocol. Which I agree with. She's also happy to do acupuncture on me, but I have to go all the way down to San Diego where her practice is, which is 3 hours away So we shall see. I wonder if it would be too crazy to use my regular acupuncturist for the acupuncture part (she's good, I like her - it's the herbs prescription I have doubts about) but go to my step MIL for herbs, since I won't need these refilled too often?? I certainly can't be driving to SD once a week, but I'm even wondering if once a month would be too much. Good thing about the step MIL, she won't be charging for her services, and I definitely want to take advantage of her offer somehow, as I seem to agree with her views about food, holistic treatment, supplements etc. more than with my actual acupuncturist. I'm glad I had this talk with her, as it helped and made much sense to me. I was feeling a little lost and confused.
Finally, her view is that the body needs a minimum of 6 months and ideally closer to a year to fully heal from a miscarriage. My plan was to start TTCing again either on the November cycle or the December one. I doubt I will want to wait much longer than that though, as my low AMH is always in the back of my head, even though I try not to think about it much and usually I'm successful. After all, there are reported cases of women whose AMH increased on subsequent tests, and research on this marker is still scatty, so I'm trying to keep a cool head about it and not let it get to me. Still, sometimes I do get anxious about whether I only have a couple years of good enough eggs left ahead, but when I mentioned this to my step MIL, she said not to think about it and to focus on having ONE HEALTHY CHILD. She said even one child would make me complete and I shouldn't worry about having one or two or whatever number. She also said that you don't need thousands upon thousands of eggs to create a healthy baby (or even two), so basically back to the theory of 'one healthy egg' is all that's needed'

Phew - I think that was everything for now. Hope everyone is doing well!

 

[Hatethewait85]

You must be so excited for your trip! A month away sounds perfect I hope you enjoy it all! Is your hubs coming with you?

It sounds like your body is making every effort to get back to normal which is awesome!!! Did you get the fertile saliva yet? Is the saliva method when you look under the microscope for ferning or something like that?

What a productive meeting you've had with your MIL! I think it would work well to have her do the herbs and then continue to see your current acupuncturist weekly for acupuncture. Would you even need to meet with her at all for the herbs? I guess she'll want to look at your tongue and check your pulse? At least that is what my lady does- she's not oriental either which I thought was weird at first. But she seems excellent so I'm not going to worry that she doesn't fit the 'image.'

Did your MIL explain why the body needs so long to heal? That seems like a crazy amount of time to wait if you ask me. I'd be like you!! haha. As I understand the low AMH, it just means you have low number of eggs left but it does not say anything about quality. Your young age makes it more likely the quality of your eggs is good!

 

[Christi85]

Thank you, yes, I am very excited! I'm busy doing laundry etc. today, I'll be packing up later and I fly tomorrow evening.
Yes, I'm so glad I can 'take' a month off - the good thing about being self employed, but of course that means I won't be working and I won't be getting paid either Unfortunately hubby isn't coming with me. We thought he could maybe join me for my last 2 weeks there and fly back with me, but the nature of his current job doesn't really allow him to take 2 weeks off all at once (he's at a digital advertising agency in charge of several client accounts), so we thought we'd leave it for this year. Although the same happened again last year (he'll be working there 2 years in November), so we've started to think that it may be time for him to look for another job with better flexibility. He'll be using his remaining days off for any interviews that may come up (assuming he'll find suitable jobs to apply to in the next month or so), and the rest he'll be taking around Thanksgiving. We're going to miss each other, that's for sure.

As for me, I guess I didn't end up ovulating this month Or at least, the tests didn't pick it up. Which is weird, because I had a lot of fertile CM on Wednesday and then again Friday-Saturday, but the test was always negative. Maybe my body geared up to ovulating, but couldn't get to actually finishing the work? No clue Yes, the saliva test is the one with the miscroscope where you are trying to see the ferning pattern. I used it the month I got pregnant for the first time and the patterns were much more pronounced than this time, but I remember still feeling confused back then and unsure as to when I did ovulate. I remember it gave me 1 day positive- 1 day transitional - 1 day positive then 1 day transitional again, and then I stopped testing. But obviously I did ovulate that month, as the results showed
I hope the next cycle will be more normal, and hopefully my cycles should be back to 100% within the next couple of months. I may also go back to urine OPKs.

Yes, it was a very productive meeting I thought. Minor correction: she's not my actual MIL. She's my step-MIL, my FIL's second wife. So not hubby's Mom Anyway, yes, I don't know how close I will be required to be to be treated by her. If it's mainly herbs, I'm sure we can find a way to only meet every now and then. For a more holistic treatment, I'd love to be treated by her since she's also family and has an extra incentive to give me the 5-star treatment, but the distance is a big problem...
No, I don't think she mentioned why she thinks the body needs that long to heal. Honestly, I think it's just different people having different opinions. E.g. my doctor told me I could TTC after I get my first period post D&C. The doctor who did my D&C as well as the nurse at that clinic told me it would be a good idea to wait 2-3 cycles to give the body some time. I've heard other doctors going with the 6 month rule, and again others who will say you can start TTCing right away, without even waiting for a period. So I think I'll stick with my original plan of starting again once I feel better and stronger on a physical and on an emotional level. I'm thinking towards the end of 2014 I'm likely to be back in the game

I agree, an acupuncturist doesn't need to be oriental to be amazing. My step-MIL is actually Middle Eastern but not Chinese, so it's not a must for me either It's just, as much as I like my acupuncturist, there is something that is a little off and I think it's the lack of a personalized holistic treatment that I was after. Probably nothing to do with her not being oriental.

As for the AMH, yes, it's a very confusing marker with not much research behind it at this time. There are even studies that challenge its validity and say it's only good to predict likely IVF outcomes in terms of numbers of eggs harvested, but it says nothing about someone's fertility or chances of having a successful pregnancy. I agree about quality too - and quality can also be improved via one's diet, nutritional supplements, even fertility massage/yoga etc., so there are things that can be done about it. Also, there have been recorded cases where women's AMH actually went up in subsequent testing, so despite the general consensus that it can only go down, there have been cases who have proven it's not so black-and-white. So I'm trying not to let it get to me and I still think I have at least 3-5 years of decent fertility and decent chances of a healthy pregnancy ahead of me

I'll make sure I read all of you in Greece and I'll be sure to update this thread if there is anything worth mentioning, otherwise I'll catch you all in early November I guess