Success stories about bottle refusers, please! Going back to work...

[Cangaroo]

Hi all. My DD is 9 months and I'm going back to work in 3.5 weeks. I have been delighted to EBF her with no bottles at all and BLW from 6 months, which is going well. She doesn't eat huge amounts, but has more than her sister used to at this age so I'm happy. However, now we're trying to get her to take milk from a cup from the childminder, and it's not going well. We have a Nuby sip 'n' grip cup (with a silicone top), which she quite likes playing with, but won't drink more than a few sips from. We've tried a doidy cup and a normal sippy cup which she does the same with. She had her first settling in session with the childminder today, and refused to eat or take milk at all and woke up starving from her nap so I had to rush back to feed her. Not ideal! I've dug out my old medala calma teat for my pump bottle. Again, she's giving it a go but not taking much. The problem is, if try her when she's actually hungry, she's too upset to even entertain the idea of trying it! I'm just looking for some reassurance she will get there, really. I wouldn't mind if she chose to eat more and wait for me to have milk overnight, but I really don't think she's going to be able to eat enough for that yet. Any tips?

I've never had this problem before. My DD1 had a bottle from 4 weeks of age as I knew I was going to work early so she'd have to take a bottle. It was never a problem. Not having to think about pumping or bottles and having a perfectly regulated supply has been wonderful, but it's a luxury I'm having to pay for now!

 

[bundle4me]

My son was exactly the same till he was 2 and i just had to wait for him to be ready. Keep trying the cups she will eventually take it but only when she wants and if she's anything like my son nothing will make her having it till she's ready. Light at the end of the tunnel was after about a month he finally gave up lol. Good luck

 

[Cangaroo]

Well, she took a little milk from a doidy cup this evening, and then ate a decent amount of dinner including loads of yogurt. Maybe she'll just rest instead of taking milk. I really wish I didn't have to go back to work!

 

[bundle4me]

Aww excellent that's progress. I know hun i can imagine x

 

[emeeorevan]

My lo was similar though I went back to work early (6weeks) i'm a teacher so I was off for the summer and she was EBF anytime I was around. I just started back to work recently and at first she re refused a bottle. After a day or so she began taking a bottle but only one 4oz bottle a day. She prefers a real cup or a water bottle! She typically nurses at 5am, eats a fruit homemade baby food at about 8am, takes a bottle around noon and eats a little more fruit/veggies around 3 if hungry but I nurse as soon as I get home around 4pm, she may or may not try some food at dinner with us around 6pm (just for trying new things) and she nurses again around 6-7 then playtime, bath, and bed (nurses to sleep) Since I've been back to work she nurses less in the day but wakes up to nurse more often at night. (1-2 times between 8pmand 5am)

 

[fortunecookie]

I had the same problem when I went back to work when DD was 6.5 months old. I persevered with the Nuby valve sip and grip. It has always been hit and miss to be honest. Sometimes she will down 4oz with OH, but sometimes she took barely an oz from the childminder. Broke my heart after all the hard work expressing 😢. She is now nearly one and cutting down on daytime feeds. She got weighed at her 8-12 month HV check and has crept up half a ce tile so I guess it hasn't hurt her not getting a great deal of milk away from me, she just made up for it when she was with me. Good luck and (unlike me) try not to panic about it to much. Just make sure she has plenty of snacks and dairy to take with her x

 

[Cangaroo]

Thanks all. I really don't mind if she takes the milk or not, as long as she has enough that she's not hungry. The problem we've had is her waking up hungry and cross, at which point all she wants is me... I'm hoping the childminder will manage to get more into her before the nap next time so that doesn't happen. Fortunecookie, did your DD manage to eat enough solids to not be hungry?

 

[wishingonastar]

I echo what bundleforme said. Both my two were exclusively breastfed as they refused bottles from the start. When I went back to work I tried every bottle known to man...none worked. Water they would drink from a tommee tippee sippy cup and I taught them to sign for it (make a squeezing fist) and their nursery staff were aware of this. Milk wise one would have a few sips from that type cup the other would refuse it. I found a big thing was that they refused expressed milk and one would tolerate a little formula so I sent her in with a small foil carton for the day and the other refused formula and went straight to cows milk which she loved.

If you're worried then just ask childminder to offer water more regularly then usual and ask them to try to add in milk and dairy based ideas where possible such as giving porridge for breakfast.

Both mine would feed like mad when I picked them up to make up for losing out in day but this soon righted itself.

It's very stressful as a parent but they honestly do find a happy ground. Once they settle in childcare babies and children are very different from their presentation in the home. My youngest could only be breastfed to sleep or driven or pushed in buggy. Yet at nursery they literally laid her on a cot bed, said night night and left room and five mins later she was asleep. I was amazed and gutted considering I went to hell and back getting that child to sleep!!!

 

[Cangaroo]

My childminder hasn't been very accommodating our reassuring, which doesn't help! She's always been great with our older DD and it's too late to change note, but it's making me more stressed. She basically told me I have to find a way to make her eat more or she'll be very unhappy all the time. Helpful. DD2 is eating well and loves yogurt, but when she's tired all she wants is me to feed her to sleep.

 

[fortunecookie]

I'm guessing she did eat enough as she put weight on. I was very concerned before I went back so I took her for a weigh in before and after a month of being at work. My childminder wasn't very patient either, I suppose it's hard when you have quite a few kids to accommodate, but in the end my DD seems happy enough there and DS is happy too. In the beginning I made up the deficit by getting her to use BM in her porridge which helped, and lots of yoghurts and fromage frais on standby. I definitely over worried and still do when cutting out the afternoon feed as I found my pump output considerably dropping (I work earlies and lates so have concentrated on masking enough for mid morning and bedtime feeds).

With regards to being upset when she wakes, are sure it's not just because she misses her mummy. My DD took quite a while to settle in but always now self soothes when with hubby or CM, but fights to get to the boob with me.

 

[Cangaroo]

I think it is hunger. The times she's napped without me in the buggy having feed before, she's been happy on waking. The times people have tried getting her to take EBM before her nap, she's woken up sad and hungry. It's very early days with settling in and we do still have plenty of time, but it's really horrible having to put your incredibly easy going and content baby in a situation where you know they'll be sad, hungry and stressed.

 

[fortunecookie]

The only other option I had thought of was popping out of work at the relevant time to BF at the childminders, although a last resort and would be very awkward. Could that be an option for you, it would be for a few months until she doesn't need quite as many daytime feeds?

 

[Cangaroo]

I really wishi could do that, but I work too far away and my working day is relentless. I can't spare time to come back to feed her.

 

[fortunecookie]

Then I think the only option is to wait a few weeks and see if she finds her groove and just perseverance on your childminders part. Breaks your heart though. Hope it all works out for you xx