Support thread for all the atheist,agnostic,non-religious and secular humanist TTCers

[tsyhanochka]

Welcome Tri, these ladies are wonderful....trust me I know.

Yay bubbles no pcos!!!!!

Viet I tested at 15 do and the test was super dark. It came up before the control line did. I was looking and thought "that's not where the control line should be I must have a bad test.....wait a minute"

Still in shock and cautious now. Losses are something that happen in my family so I'll be treading lightly until Ukrainian Christmas in January.

Thanks everyone. Mrs M and I will revive the other thread or make a new one. Hope to still pop in here too still some. And fx many of you will be joining us on "the other side" very soon.

You ladies and my other group of ladies mean so much to me. This has been the best support a girl could ask for in all sincerity.

 

[triceratops]

Thanks for all the support chikas! I get a bloodtest today so I should know for sure very soon!!! how long does a bloodtest take to come back? I'm having it done at my Ob's office....

had a crazy pressure that I was really nervous about on Tuesday....felt like it was splitting me up the middle and got worse as i sat down that pain only happened once and it only lasted a minute. other than that, very slight cramps a couple times a day. does anyone know what im talking about???

i've been soooooooo emotional too.....crying all the time...this is SOOOOOO not me....am i pregnant or just worried??? who knows??

Thanks for the Agnes Castes (vitex) recommendation and accupuncture. I'm gonna get some and try it if this is negative today. My parents want to help us get pregnant, and told me they wanna pay for a couple things every now and then i'm lucky to have them

Obviously, I haven't had any alcohol for a few months, but after this cycle, if we find out we're not pregnant, it's time for WINGS AND BEER but if i am prego, i'll be veeeeery happy! **babydusting myself** lol

 

[triceratops]

just found out yesterday that in the last month, 2 of my sister-in-laws had miscarriages... makes me want to cry bc i know what they are going through but we aren't close enough to talk about it.....i'm so glad i have this outlet to vent my worries and frustrations

thanks

 

[Sbmack]

Welcome Tri! I always have cramps throughout the second half of my cycle. Usually around my ovaries though...not usually in the center. How sad for them both to have a mc. Hopefully they can talk to each other about it. Sorry about your long cycles. It must be very frusterating.

I am not feeling too well today. Started spotting last night. AF is due on Saturday. We didn't get to bd as much this cycle so I wasn't super hopeful, but it still sucks. I'm going to try progesterone cream next month to help lengthen my lp, which I think is only at 12 days.

 

[triceratops]

keep me posted about your progesterone cream experience on here! what are your symptoms that made you think you might have low progesterone? Did you need a bloodtest to determine levels? Just curious bc I am looking for options for myself

 

[pbl_ge]

I'll add a bit about progesterone cream. The first thing is that it's not an empirically supported treatment, meaning that there's not much evidence it works (and some suggesting it doesn't) unless you have a verified (by blood tests) deficiency. And I don't think that's really accepted an "effective," either. The second thing to know is that the extra progesterone can have some nontrivial side effects, so it's not recommended unless you really need it. Third, and this one is tougher, it may cause nonviable pregnancies to hang on longer than they should.

I write all this as someone who self-diagnosed a progesterone deficiency and started using the cream, but still had a miscarriage (and a prolonged one, at that). After reading more and talking to my doctors, I will not be using it again in the future.

I don't mean to discourage anyone--just had to share my experiences.

 

[Sbmack]

I'll add a bit about progesterone cream. The first thing is that it's not an empirically supported treatment, meaning that there's not much evidence it works (and some suggesting it doesn't) unless you have a verified (by blood tests) deficiency. And I don't think that's really accepted an "effective," either. The second thing to know is that the extra progesterone can have some nontrivial side effects, so it's not recommended unless you really need it. Third, and this one is tougher, it may cause nonviable pregnancies to hang on longer than they should.

I write all this as someone who self-diagnosed a progesterone deficiency and started using the cream, but still had a miscarriage (and a prolonged one, at that). After reading more and talking to my doctors, I will not be using it again in the future.

I don't mean to discourage anyone--just had to share my experiences.

Thanks for all the info plb! I hope your body is recovering...not that your mind ever will.

I just started looking into the cream. I think I may have low progesterone because my periods keep getting shorter ( 25) and I spot thoughout the second half of my cycle. I haven't been tested bc my dr. won't until I've been trying for a year. It's only been six months with two ntnp prior.

 

[Rachelle351]

HI!!! Can I join you ladies?

Heres my story: I was born and raised Methodist. But honestly, my parents were never really that religious. I on the other hand was the polar opposite. I went to church, pretty regularly, with or without my parents. I was against sex before marriage, and divorce (which really stems from the fact that my parents are divorced). I made the bold decision to wait until I was married to have sex. Which still to this day, I am so proud of myself. My mother was abusive, physically and mentally, and I had a fairly bad childhood. I was diagnosed in 2010 with major depression and generalized anxiety disorder. The majority of that came out because of the abuse. I got married when I was 19, so my husband is in the army. He's first duty station was in Germany. One of the worst experiences of my life. (I was in from 2005 to 2008) It plunged me into a very dark place. It still wasn't resolved when we pcsed (moved) to our next duty station, Ft Riley, KS. My husband was in Iraq, and he did some really mean, terrible things to me. (he didn't cheat, its a really long story) Everything accumulated, and I had a complete and total nervous breakdown. I stopped eating and sleeping. During this time is when I started to question my faith. I consider myself to be a very good person. I thought I had done everything right. So if God loved me so much, why was all this bad stuff happening to me? I slowly started to lose my faith. War, child abuse, rape, animal abuse....why does all that happen? If there was really someone up there who was almighty and all this and all that, then WHY does he let bad stuff happen? I eventually started leaning towards agnostic. I felt, IF there was a god, theres no way we could ever know about it. then we moved to Ft Lewis, WA. I met someone who told me to watch the movie "Zeitgeist". It really goes into depth about "god". It scientifically explains all the great things god "did". I opened my eyes, and realized there wasn't a god. I am now a full blown atheist.

I believe in Freedom of Religion. And I think everyone should believe in whatever gives them comfort. But I hate religion with a burning passion. I think it causes way too many problems, and causes people to be hypocrites, judgmental, and all around jerks. In my eyes, the biggest hypocrites ARE religious people. I feel like they use God as an excuse to do bad things. They do horrible stuff, and then hide behind their god. Its just another way to say "better than you".

Anyways, I'm done! =)

 

[babyluv2012]

I just had an early loss Got a BFP on 11/1 and got HCG test showing that the levels were doubling, but I was spotting the whole time. Just found out on Wednesday that the HCG levels went from 150 down to 30 in about 5 days or so. The doctor said the pregnancy is not viable, I just started the heavy bleeding today.

So now I have had an ectopic (4 years ago) and a chemical pregnancy (don't love that word) I like to just call it an early loss.

Just need a little encouragment as I feel that maybe I won't ever be able to have a baby.

I was only about 5 weeks and I know it is early, but I'm still really sad I was already getting really attached to that little ball of cells that I thought was going to be our baby.

 

[bubbles82]

Really sorry to hear that chick, I can't imagine how horrible that experience is. Hugs to you. You will get that BFP eventually, got to believe that xx

 

[pbl_ge]

I just had an early loss Got a BFP on 11/1 and got HCG test showing that the levels were doubling, but I was spotting the whole time. Just found out on Wednesday that the HCG levels went from 150 down to 30 in about 5 days or so. The doctor said the pregnancy is not viable, I just started the heavy bleeding today.

So now I have had an ectopic (4 years ago) and a chemical pregnancy (don't love that word) I like to just call it an early loss.

Just need a little encouragment as I feel that maybe I won't ever be able to have a baby.

I was only about 5 weeks and I know it is early, but I'm still really sad I was already getting really attached to that little ball of cells that I thought was going to be our baby.

Awwwww.... I know a bit about how you feel, although I've only had one loss. It's terrible, and I don't care if you're 4 weeks or 12 weeks. I do think it can be worse later in a pregnancy, but that doesn't mean that early losses aren't incredibly painful. For me, the hormone changes when the pregnancy first started to fail made it feel truly calamitous--this improved a bit a few days later when my body was a bit (just a bit, mind you) more stabilized.

I can't provide the light at the end of the tunnel, as I'm only now getting back to normal after my ectopic, but there are loads of ladies who have been through far more losses than you and have gone on to have happy and healthy babies. Obviously, you can get pregnant, which is a huge step, as many women struggle to get that far. But spend some time on the TTC after a loss, and the TTC after multiple losses, threads and you'll find some amazingly strong women who have succeeded after some truly harrowing TTC journeys.

It will happen for you too! In the meantime, take very good care of yourself!

 

[pbl_ge]

Really sorry to hear that chick, I can't imagine how horrible that experience is. Hugs to you. You will get that BFP eventually, got to believe that xx

Hi Bubbles! Congrats for the O!!!! How are you doing?

 

[bubbles82]

Hey Pbl!

Thanks! They're as rare as rocking horse poop these days for me eh! So quite exciting, although not hopeful for a BFP due to my internal scan taking place at the most inappropriate time! But I'm doing ok thanks, just happy things are kind of working as they should, and hopeful I can shave anothe couple of weeks off my next cycle too!

How's everything with you? xx

 

[pbl_ge]

Hey Pbl!

Thanks! They're as rare as rocking horse poop these days for me eh! So quite exciting, although not hopeful for a BFP due to my internal scan taking place at the most inappropriate time! But I'm doing ok thanks, just happy things are kind of working as they should, and hopeful I can shave anothe couple of weeks off my next cycle too!

How's everything with you? xx

What's better than a dirty colloquial simile?

What do you mean by internal scan? HSG? I will be having one of those in a little over a week, because (drum roll.....) I am finally on CD1 of a new cycle! Yay! I busted out the champagne that I got for election night, but didn't drink because I couldn't stay up late enough to find out an official winner.

 

[tsyhanochka]

YAY for CD 1 pbl! As weird as that is to say to some TTC ladies... I know you've been wanting to resume normality. And Champers is one way to celebrate that!

Bubbles, what kind of scan did you have? Just fyi I had my internal ultrasound this cycle and it didn't seem to effect me. What do you mean by "inappropriate time" if I may ask?

good luck for this cycle ladies.

 

[babyluv2012]

I just had an early loss Got a BFP on 11/1 and got HCG test showing that the levels were doubling, but I was spotting the whole time. Just found out on Wednesday that the HCG levels went from 150 down to 30 in about 5 days or so. The doctor said the pregnancy is not viable, I just started the heavy bleeding today.

So now I have had an ectopic (4 years ago) and a chemical pregnancy (don't love that word) I like to just call it an early loss.

Just need a little encouragment as I feel that maybe I won't ever be able to have a baby.

I was only about 5 weeks and I know it is early, but I'm still really sad I was already getting really attached to that little ball of cells that I thought was going to be our baby.

Awwwww.... I know a bit about how you feel, although I've only had one loss. It's terrible, and I don't care if you're 4 weeks or 12 weeks. I do think it can be worse later in a pregnancy, but that doesn't mean that early losses aren't incredibly painful. For me, the hormone changes when the pregnancy first started to fail made it feel truly calamitous--this improved a bit a few days later when my body was a bit (just a bit, mind you) more stabilized.

I can't provide the light at the end of the tunnel, as I'm only now getting back to normal after my ectopic, but there are loads of ladies who have been through far more losses than you and have gone on to have happy and healthy babies. Obviously, you can get pregnant, which is a huge step, as many women struggle to get that far. But spend some time on the TTC after a loss, and the TTC after multiple losses, threads and you'll
some amazingly strong women who have succeeded after some truly harrowing TTC journeys.

It will happen for you too! In the meantime, take very good care of yourself!

Thank you for the kind words. I am also sorry for your loss as well.

 

[bubbles82]

Yay for CD1 Pbl, I know what a tough time you've had lately, so it's good to have a line drawn in a way I guess, must be good to see your body kind of let you know it's ready to try again.

My scan was meant to be just an abdominal ultrasound but ended up being a transvaginal ultrasound too, and it ended up being the day before I ovulated, right in between the two BD I got in. So I just worry that it could've affected our chances when we don't get many goes as it is.

 

[vietmamsie]

babyluv: So sorry for your loss I had a MC 8 weeks ago and it is still very hard and painful. I know what you're going through.

Bubbles: I think you should be fine with the scan, I don't think it should effect you... congrats on the O! I just got mine as well and feeling pleased as we BDed at just the right time! want to be TWW buddies? When are you testing?

pbl: Wahoo!!! time to celebrate for sure. I can't believe you have had to go through this MC for so long.... Now its finally over.

AFM, got cross hairs on CD16, then they moved to CD18 after I entered my temp from this morning. Feeling good about our chances, we missed O day, but we got in -2-1 and +1.

SS: sore bbs for the last few days... wondering if I just slept on them wrong or something? Cramps for the last week or so.

 

[vietmamsie]

Rachelle: Welcome to the group! Sorry for what all you have been through, but happy that you seem to be on the right track now. Good Luck!

 

[bubbles82]

Thanks Viet, I just got it in my head that the gel probably isn't sperm friendly, so he BD the day before the scan might've been ok, but I don't feel positive that the poor swimmers could've survived the day after with all that still up there, not sure how long it takes to disappear! Also during my research (consulting Dr Google) into what effect the gel could have, I didn't get a conclusive answer, but ended up finding info about how the ultrasound waves themselves are actually harmful to sperm. So not feeling hopeful, but you never know. I'm just pleased to be in a TWW again either way!

Good luck with your TWW, chart looking good! I'm not really a fan of testing, I have a 15/16 day LP so AF is due around 29th/30th Nov and I normally just try wait for that, I'm sure my chart will give me the heads up she's on her way!