Thoughts on this....??

[Katt]

Personally I think it is rude the lady said that, and as said, its not my cup of tea, but each to their own.

I woudl like to comment on some interesting points though and some personal opinion.
For me, I do too wonder for whom's benefit it is for and in my opinion, maybe its more for the mothers, and an aspect of not wanting their baby to have their own independence, letting go, etc. but thats just my psychology training coming in..

Also with regards to the sexual comments with boobs, my breast feeding book mentioned that it is common to get slightly aroused when breast feeding your baby, and so the fine line between them being 'sexual' or not is not that defined.

Finally, with the comment people make on other cultures, we are not living in those cultures, just as they are not living here. Maybe they would like to try our way, and might prefer it? We have a much more conveient, busy, working world,(in the West) where talking a baby into a client board meeting in a sling is not deemed appropriate, but thats our culture. Its the way we are. the fact that many do not extend breastfeed, is not a sad reflection on our society, its our culture. We dont not need to learn from other cultures, as many ways would not fit.

I have read the thread!

You say that you wonder whose benefit it is for, then your next point goes on to add that mum might get slightly aroused. That suggests that mum does it for her own benefit as it arouses her.

Surely you can see why I got confused there!

 

[My_First]

Personally I think it is rude the lady said that, and as said, its not my cup of tea, but each to their own.

I woudl like to comment on some interesting points though and some personal opinion.
For me, I do too wonder for whom's benefit it is for and in my opinion, maybe its more for the mothers, and an aspect of not wanting their baby to have their own independence, letting go, etc. but thats just my psychology training coming in..

Also with regards to the sexual comments with boobs, my breast feeding book mentioned that it is common to get slightly aroused when breast feeding your baby, and so the fine line between them being 'sexual' or not is not that defined.

Finally, with the comment people make on other cultures, we are not living in those cultures, just as they are not living here. Maybe they would like to try our way, and might prefer it? We have a much more conveient, busy, working world,(in the West) where talking a baby into a client board meeting in a sling is not deemed appropriate, but thats our culture. Its the way we are. the fact that many do not extend breastfeed, is not a sad reflection on our society, its our culture. We dont not need to learn from other cultures, as many ways would not fit.

I have read the thread!

You say that you wonder whose benefit it is for, then your next point goes on to add that mum might get slightly aroused. That suggests that mum does it for her own benefit as it arouses her.

Surely you can see why I got confused there!

Sorry for the confusion, it was reasons as to why people MAY find it difficult to seperate boobs as sexual and boobs as food, AS quote the breastfeeding book, I paraphrase, 'Its not uncommon to have sexual feelings when breastfeeding'. It was actually three different points, one on the sexual point that related to some not being able to seperate the two.

I have also stressed 'MAY' and not 'Will', just to clarify...

 

[Katt]

I get it now!


It just goes to show how complicated the issue is!

 

[Mum22GTTC]

And as for BF being sexual It's silly statements like that that give BF the stigma it's got.

I feel I need to clarify this and it was me that brought this up. The only reason I commented on this was because it was a statement made in a legimate breastfeeding book. The book is VERY pro breastfeeding and attachment parenting, and so it gave me no reason to doubt its credability. It does also seem that some comments since that it is actually more common that one thinks, (or cares to admit).

"or cares to admit"

I don't know if you meant that in the way I've read it, but to me, that line says a lot about your opinion.

No, totally mis read...I am not in the slighest being rude, or abnoxious, or anti breastfeeding. Hey I did it myself for a good few months! What I meant is because some people may not want to admit to feeling that way, because it may come across as 'weird', whereas its totally normal.

May I add, that I dont think its weird at all, neither is it my business whether people choose to extend breastfeeding or not, and neither did I want everyone jumping on the 'sexual' thing, it was a legitimate comment i read, which I have quoted and referenced, which could possibly lead to a theory that maybe defining the two feelin gs maybe not be as clearly defined.

I am not intending to make judgemental assumptions here, nor trying to offened anyone, just offering an alternative thought. Apologies if you read it that way..

I get you now. Thank you for explaining

 

[mumoffive]

Well i suppose im going to get shot down in flames for this but it is my opinion and many im sure will disagree.

It is a fact that by the time a child is 4, they are expected to be weaned from milk and on solid, ordinary food..so imo, a child does not have the need for breastmilk from a nutritional point of view. If its for comfort, well thats a different matter.

Therefore, it doesnt seem right to me to still be bf a 4 year old. They need to grow up and part of that is being independant from mum.I dont think its disgusting..just not appropriate at that age. I also admit i would feel very uncomfortable about someone doing that in front of me.

 

[Lara310809]

She's certainly not got a reason to be ashamed of herself, but at the same time it's not considered normal to breastfeed a child of that age. Breastfeeding a newborn baby, unfortunately isn't universally accepted, so many mothers are told to stop feeding, or that they're being inconsiderate to others by feeding their babies in public - and that's when they're feeding a newborn So when it's done to feed an older child, it's not surprising that it's met with adverse reactions.

I don't think it's acceptable to tell anyone to stop breastfeeding their child though. It's a source of nutrition at the end of the day, and what other people think about it shouldn't come into the matter. I don't think the mother should have to defend her actions or explain herself to anyone either. I personally wouldn't breastfeed a child beyond a year old, but that's my personal preference. I don't really care, nor is it any of my business what other mothers choose to do. I know what's right for me, and what's right for my children, and surely that's all that matters here?

 

[T-Bex]

I don't see what the problem with it is, personally. Live and let live. The worldwide average of weaning is 4, anyway, so she's just normal, for the world average.

 

[kmumtobe]

Not my thing but she was doing nothing wrong so no need for comment, people should learn to keep their mouths shut.

 

[Palestrina]

Before I BF my son I had preconceived notions and I remember them clearly. Based on my upbringing, culture, society, and experience I thought the following things.

- Breast is best
- 6 months BF is long enough
- If a child is old enough to ask for it, they're too old to BF
- NIP should be discreet with a cover up
- Pumping is just as good

During pregnancy I took the time to do research on BF because I really wanted to do it. I was armed with the above list of knowledge. Slowly that knowledge started to evolve. I realized that 6 months may or may not be long enough and the only people who can decide that for us is me and my LO. I realized that pumping is not easy and try to do it as little as possible while still building a freezer stash. I realized that NIP is the most important thing we BF moms can do to promote BF. The longer we hide in the toilet doing it the longer the stigma of BF continues. And I also learned that a baby asks for milk from the moment they are born, whether they can say the words or not.

 

[mumoffive]

There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a baby but the point remains, children of 4 dont need to be breastfed for nutritional reasons. That is a fact.

 

[xemmax]

Before I BF my son I had preconceived notions and I remember them clearly. Based on my upbringing, culture, society, and experience I thought the following things.

- Breast is best
- 6 months BF is long enough
- If a child is old enough to ask for it, they're too old to BF
- NIP should be discreet with a cover up
- Pumping is just as good

During pregnancy I took the time to do research on BF because I really wanted to do it. I was armed with the above list of knowledge. Slowly that knowledge started to evolve. I realized that 6 months may or may not be long enough and the only people who can decide that for us is me and my LO. I realized that pumping is not easy and try to do it as little as possible while still building a freezer stash. I realized that NIP is the most important thing we BF moms can do to promote BF. The longer we hide in the toilet doing it the longer the stigma of BF continues. And I also learned that a baby asks for milk from the moment they are born, whether they can say the words or not.

 

[youngmummy94]

There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a baby but the point remains, children of 4 dont need to be breastfed for nutritional reasons. That is a fact.

Why breastfeeding your toddler is a good idea
• Even though your child is now getting most of his nutrition from solid food, breastmilk still provides valuable immunities, vitamins, and enzymes. In fact, studies have shown that breastfed toddlers get sick less frequently than their peers do.

• As your child becomes more independent, breastfeeding can be an important source of reassurance and emotional support. The strong attachment your child feels with you while feeding will foster independence, not make him overly dependent or clingy as some may have you believe. Our culture tends to believe that "pushing" children away will help them develop a strong sense of self-worth and independence, but forcing a child to stop breastfeeding before he is developmentally ready will not necessarily create a more confident child; rather, it could make him more clingy.

• If your child is ill, breastmilk may be the only thing he can keep down. You'll feel better too, knowing that you're helping him fight off the illness.


Read more: https://www.babycenter.com.au/baby/breastfeeding/extendedbreastfeeding/#ixzz1Yy6ONViG

 

[Blah11]

Kids don't NEED formula or milk at all once weaned but we give it to them anyway cos its good for them. Breast milk is no different except its even better for them and provides immunities that NO other food source can. The same cannot be said for other milks.

 

[Palestrina]

There is nothing wrong with breastfeeding a baby but the point remains, children of 4 dont need to be breastfed for nutritional reasons. That is a fact.

Why breastfeeding your toddler is a good idea
• Even though your child is now getting most of his nutrition from solid food, breastmilk still provides valuable immunities, vitamins, and enzymes. In fact, studies have shown that breastfed toddlers get sick less frequently than their peers do.

• As your child becomes more independent, breastfeeding can be an important source of reassurance and emotional support. The strong attachment your child feels with you while feeding will foster independence, not make him overly dependent or clingy as some may have you believe. Our culture tends to believe that "pushing" children away will help them develop a strong sense of self-worth and independence, but forcing a child to stop breastfeeding before he is developmentally ready will not necessarily create a more confident child; rather, it could make him more clingy.

• If your child is ill, breastmilk may be the only thing he can keep down. You'll feel better too, knowing that you're helping him fight off the illness.


Read more: https://www.babycenter.com.au/baby/breastfeeding/extendedbreastfeeding/#ixzz1Yy6ONViG

Only fair to point out the flip side they talk about in the same article. And to be clear, a 4yr old is not a toddler.

Why breastfeeding your toddler can be a challenge

• Expect rude comments and criticism from people who think breastfeeding an older child is strange. You may have to be more cautious about breastfeeding in public if you want to avoid the inevitable remarks. This can be difficult if your toddler lifts up your shirt in the supermarket and demands a quick snack.

• Breastfeeding can become a crutch. Your baby may start to rely on the breast when he's really just bored or it's the only way to get your attention. Engage your child in other ways - toddlers are eager to explore the world and need stimulation to fuel their rapid development.

• Breastfeeding a toddler when you've got another baby on the way is possible, but some women find it too physically demanding. Unless you plan to continue breastfeeding your older child after the new baby is born, you may want to think about weaning her before the 'competition' arrives. However, many toddlers decide to wean themselves when their mother is pregnant, because the taste (and sometimes volume) of her milk changes during pregnancy.

 

[Blah11]

Lol, have you ever bf a toddler or when pregnant?

Eta just realised that's not your opinion. No idea.where they plucked that info from!

 

[youngmummy94]

Lol, have you ever bf a toddler or when pregnant?

Eta just realised that's not your opinion. No idea.where they plucked that info from!

If your talking to me.. I found it on a website...

 

[hot tea]

Nothing weird about it at all. I breastfed my son until three and a bit. I will tell you, I did it for hm, not for me. At two I put my hands up and said I am done... He wanted to continue, so on we went.

I could not justify quitting when he clearly needed it. He needed it for bonding, not just nutrition. I do not regret it at all.

We never breastfed in public after a certain age though, I understand it is very controversial.

 

[mumoffive]

Its not necessary and thats the point. If people want to then thats up to the individual...but the simple fact is that its just not necessary to feed a 4 year old breastmilk. How many animals in nature do you see still suckling their young when they are past a certain level of maturity? None. As i say, its my opinion and others will disagree and thats fine but the original op did ask for opinions.
I would also argue why bf a 4 year old when they can get the nutrients from other things? Im not sure about antibodies at that age so i cant comment on that one..but in my mind i think surely it would be negligable anyway since they have to develop their own immunity to things anway and at some point? I personally think the immunity argument has been overplayed but again that is imo and not based on any research..just life experience.
I would also agree that it is also true that a 4 year old is actually by toddler hood.

 

[mumoffive]

I would also add, finally, for those that think they would do it until 4 at what age would they stop and why? Why stop at all? It could provide life long immunity to just continue lol!!!...and with those same reasons i would say they are the same ones i would use to stop when 'weaning' is more or less complete.

 

[hot tea]

Even if I produced absolutely nothing I would still have let my son suckle if he had wanted to. I don't see the problem with breastfeeding purely for bonding??? It is the most natural bonding time between mom and child. If it doesnt work for you, dont do it though.

Breastmilk is nutritional. Whether it is necessary or not is another story. No, it is not bloody necessary... Neither is that standard glass of enriched milk most parents give their children during the day. I personally think cows milk is unhelpful in its natural form and humans shouldnt drink it at all. We are the only animals that drink other mammals milk. Fancy that! At least breastmilk is built for the human body.

As for immunities, they help them build their own natural immunities. Not sure where you are going with that one.