To drink or not to drink?

[Dragonfly]

Never mind all the scientific research wheres the common sence?

 

[BrandiCanucks]

^ well im afraid they are basing that on old research, how can they say its okay? Do they personally know for sure? Recent studies have proven that no amount is safe 100%

You might have one a week and your baby may be fine, but how do you really know? Evry recent study i have seen recommends NO alcohol, for the fact that they cant say for sure how much exactly may or may not be safe.

Why risk it? I just dont understand. You dont need alcohol, it does nothing good for your baby? Whats the big deal in abstaining for such a short amount of time?

Its a choice, I enjoy alcohol, plus I have not been told to abstain totally. Do I take the advice from my Dr's and Midwives, or do I take advice from a Forum? As I keep saying, its a personal choice...

So what about the personal choice of your child? What about when your child is born with facial anomalies and is made fun of in school? What about when your child has trouble with articulation and no one can understand him/her? What about when your child struggles to spell his/her name because his/her mentality is that of a 6 month old? How about you struggling to potty train your child or teach them not to run into the road?

How could you, knowing the risks, even consider risking it?! As I said, I hope your child isn't born with the difficulties, as a parent of a special needs child, I would never wish a special needs child on anyone, but it baffles me how a mother can be okay with risking disabilities in their child that is totally preventable. Totally, totally selfish. I don't care if you enjoy alcohol. It's 40 weeks. You can hold out, and if you can't, then you need some intervention.

This may come across as harsh, and feel free to flame me for it, but if your child is born with FAS or FAE, I hope to God you regret your decision to drink in pregnancy and work your ass off to support that child through all the difficulties he or she may have, because it's a lifelong job raising a special needs child and it is FAR FROM EASY

 

[ShanandBoc]

Never mind all the scientific research wheres the common sence?

Ive mentioned this several times. Alcohol isnt good for a baby? How is this hard to comprehend and accept?

 

[Jess&Jay]

Only a Selfish mother would ask their doctor "IS IT OKAY TO CONTINUE DRINKING?!" When drinking while NOT being pregnant is STILL dangerous for you. Drinking whileNOT pregnant is YOUR CHOICE. Drinking AND BEING PREGNANT should not be your choice, it should be WHAT IS RIGHT FOR THE BABY.

Have you noticed drinkers, that this whole time debating, you are only saying HOW YOU ENJOY A DRINK. Give drinks to all minors and maybe that'll make things okay for u to drink while pregnant then!

 

[My_First]

I think the difference we have here is that US is stated as NONE. However UK it is not, and I think thats perhaps why this gets so heated...I dont think any of us will ever be in agreement.

 

[ShanandBoc]

Jess&Jay while i agree with the majority of what you are saying, calling people that choose to drink 'selfish' isnt really appropriate.....it will only get this thread closed.

Opinions have much greater effects if they dont include personal attacks xo

 

[My_First]

Only a Selfish mother would ask their doctor "IS IT OKAY TO CONTINUE DRINKING?!" When drinking while NOT being pregnant is STILL dangerous for you. Drinking whileNOT pregnant is YOUR CHOICE. Drinking AND BEING PREGNANT should not be your choice, it should be WHAT IS RIGHT FOR THE BABY.

Have you noticed drinkers, that this whole time debating, you are only saying HOW YOU ENJOY A DRINK. Give drinks to all minors and maybe that'll make things okay for u to drink while pregnant then!

I am sorry I didnt ASK 'Can I drink?' I was offered that drinking is okay in small amounts, as does all my pre natel literature. So don't you dare call me selfish when you dont even know me. Its actually quite rude. And it is my choice, just as its your to abstain.

 

[elephant29]

I have to agree with My_First on this one. It is a personal choice if someone decides they would like the occassional drink during pregnancy. YOU may not agree, literature and research has not been conclusive either way.

"The link between heavy drinking during pregnancy and consequent poor behavioural and cognitive outcomes in children is well established.

"However, very few studies have considered whether light drinking in pregnancy is a risk for behavioural and cognitive problems in children.

"Our research has found that light drinking by pregnant mothers does not increase the risk of behavioural difficulties or cognitive deficits.

"Indeed, for some behavioural and cognitive outcomes children born to light drinkers were less likely to have problems compared to children of abstinent mothers, although children born to heavy drinkers were more likely to have problems compared to children of mothers who drank nothing whilst pregnant."

This was a study carried out by the University College London, not someone just deciding they would say how they felt.

I think we can all agree that heavy drinking during pregnancy is inappropriate and dangerous, but until further research is done it is unfair to condem someone who choses to have 1 or 2 during pregnancy. And i don't drink now! I had half a glass of champagne on my 30th a few mths back but have had nothing since so it is not a case of me agreeing with this point because I like to drink. I just feel strongly that it is personal choice.

 

[Dragonfly]

See where back to the row that always occurs here and what other word is there for a mum who dosnt want to abstain from something that could be dangerous to her child she is meant to keep safe and healthy as she can inside her but just dosnt want to?

I wouldnt use that word as it does sound harsh but I can understand why the word has been used. Its only 40 weeks or less if as some find out when they are 4 weeks on etc so why not just not have any just to be safe? instead be (insert word you wish) and have some just to make you feel better.

 

[polo_princess]

With reference to giving minors/children alcohol, its actually perfectly legal here to give a child aged 5 and over alcohol whilst in your own home, now whether you agree with that is a whole other topic, but just to clear up the "well give your kids a drink" comparison.

I dont know how the law stands with that in other countries but yeah, thats how it is here in the UK

And also ladies, please refrain from calling people "selfish" "ignorant" etc, its not contructive nor helpful in getting your point across and will only result in tit for tat arguing and the discussion coming to a prompt end, thanks

 

[ShanandBoc]

I have to agree with My_First on this one. It is a personal choice if someone decides they would like the occassional drink during pregnancy. YOU may not agree, literature and research has not been conclusive either way.

.

But thats the point that it hasnt been conclusive of how much , if any is a safe amount. So there is risk involved to your unborn baby when you drink....it hasnt been proven that its not! Hence its recommended to abstain.

 

[NicoleB]

You have no control tho over your baby ending up with downs syndrome? x

Sorry I don't know if you meant that as a question or not but..No I do not think you can control rather your baby has downs or not. We found out at my 18 weeks scan that my now 14 month old had a 2 vessel cord (3 is normal) and babies with 2 vessel colds can be born with downs, spina bifida, heart problem, under weight or all the above. I never smoked or drank or eat bad things. There was no way I had done anything that would have caused the 2 vessel cord..and that alone could have caused downs. Thankfully my little man was 100% at birth and still is. Anyway all I'm saying is no I don't think you can control rather your baby has downs or not.

 

[BrandiCanucks]

I won't call you selfish, but I will agree the decision to drink during pregnancy and risk disabilities that are completely preventable IS selfish. You say you enjoy alcohol, well, if you can't abstain for the health and safety of your baby, then perhaps those who choose to drink during pregnancy need some intervention.

You want some literature from the UK?

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/13332.php

May I ask what kind of financial supports the UK offers kids with disabilities? If it's none, thn perhaps that's why the government hasn't yet recommended no alcohol, because they don't have to pay for the choices of parents inflicted upon their children.

Regardless of what your UK literature says compared to my Canadian/US literature and recommendations, ALL literature agrees that THERE IS NO KNOWN SAFE AMOUNT OF ALCOHOL IN PREGNANCY!! That does not translate to, "Okay, I guess I can drink some because they don't know the dangerous amount" it translates to "You know, it's common sense, I need to abstain from alcohol because my absorption rate is probably different from another's woman's, so even one drink could affect my child".

My god, it's friggin common sense, and if your doctor and midwife told you it's okay to drink, then they ought to lose their licenses. They're not the ones having to raise these poor innocent children. I hope if your child is born with FAS, you can live with you decision.

 

[ShanandBoc]

You have no control tho over your baby ending up with downs syndrome? x

Sorry I don't know if you meant that as a question or not but..No I do not think you can control rather your baby has downs or not. We found out at my 18 weeks scan that my now 14 month old had a 2 vessel cord (3 is normal) and babies with 2 vessel colds can be born with downs, spina bifida, heart problem, under weight or all the above. I never smoked or drank or eat bad things. There was no way I had done anything that would have caused the 2 vessel cord..and that alone could have caused downs. Thankfully my little man was 100% at birth and still is. Anyway all I'm saying is no I don't think you can control rather your baby has downs or not.

It was in response to the previous post hun, i was stating that you dont have any control over DS but you do with FES AND FAS as DS was used as a comparison xo

Lol does that make sense??

 

[Jess&Jay]

You can give a child alcohol in the UK? Wow.

Alcohol is a DRUG. Feeding your unborn a drug is ridiculous just because YOU want a drink. This argument is going no where and should be closed PERIOD. Not because I'm sayin certain mothers are selfish, which are.

 

[Lady-K]

*Gets popcorn*

 

[My_First]

You have no control tho over your baby ending up with downs syndrome? x

Sorry I don't know if you meant that as a question or not but..No I do not think you can control rather your baby has downs or not. We found out at my 18 weeks scan that my now 14 month old had a 2 vessel cord (3 is normal) and babies with 2 vessel colds can be born with downs, spina bifida, heart problem, under weight or all the above. I never smoked or drank or eat bad things. There was no way I had done anything that would have caused the 2 vessel cord..and that alone could have caused downs. Thankfully my little man was 100% at birth and still is. Anyway all I'm saying is no I don't think you can control rather your baby has downs or not.

It was in response to the previous post hun, i was stating that you dont have any control over DS but you do with FES AND FAS as DS was used as a comparison xo

Lol does that make sense??

It was my badly explained example that caused confusion...

 

[BrandiCanucks]

"However, very few studies have considered whether light drinking in pregnancy is a risk for behavioural and cognitive problems in children.

"Our research has found that light drinking by pregnant mothers does not increase the risk of behavioural difficulties or cognitive deficits.

As someone in the field of working with children with disabilities, I would completely disagree with this statement. Go look up fetal alcohol effect or Alcohol-related Neurodevelopmental Disorder.

 

[Armywife]

People are never going to agree here, despite how strongly each person may argue their case. I think the best thing to do here is leave it. Some posts are getting to the point where they could be considered offensive which is a shame as we are all here as we want the best for our babies, even if we do have different views as to what 'the best' may be. Hormones and emotions run wild during pregnancy and i'd hate any of you ladies to be more stressed than we already are at the moment!

 

[ShanandBoc]

I must admit the fact thats legal to give your child aged 5 and over alcohol in your own home i find astonishing...i had to re read the post i thought it was a joke!!??!

I know princess polo wasnt condoning it, i just cant believe any government would make that legal.