Trying To Conceive After Tubal Reversal

[tatertahelon]

Getting pregnant is definitely NOT something WE have total control over...If we did, we'd all have babies and be happy and wouldn't need this thread b/c life would perfect

IVF IS super expensive...like 7K for ONE round..and I (like you Dash) don't agree w/ it so much...not for me...
My TR was 11K and really we could have went one round IVF and failed then been more in the hole..Thinking the TR was the right choice,,,and the fact that we ALL did what we did and then chose to change that and choose life...we WILL be blessed...I REALLY believe it..and REALLY the stat's for TR ARE really good, like 86%~something huge...
Momma, THANK YOU for posting what you posted about the moods, un-enjoyment, ya know the one...about it consuming...I HAVE SOOOO felt that way and was "scared" to express it..I HATE to allow ANYTHING RULE my life...it's hard enough to CHOOSE to be positive w/out having a HUGE "thing" on the brain....I've SO been there and then felt rotten about feeling that way..UGH ..and Faith THANK YOU for posting what you did...I've sooo pushed my DC to the side a time or 2 or MANY times to google, research etc etc etc..I put them to bed...stay up FAR to late and then can't wake up w/ them in the morning....Or if I do, am grumpy w/ them...
I find out I'm not preg and get annoyed w/ THEM, I MC I'm annoyed w/ them..WHAT??????? Far too often I've allowed me to dwell on what I DO NOT have and want rather than what I have and cherish...I DO NOT NEED more children..I do desire to have a large family..but we DO NOT NEED and instead of being grateful I'm annoyed, grumpy, and mean..???!!!! WHOA
I'm sorry I'm having a lil tangent but I THINK It's a good thing
I have decided that THIS is THE month...ALL of my faith is in my God FOR that...IF He would chose to not bless that...OK, but either way I WILL stop temping in 70 days...I'll know my bod by then which IS what I wanted to accomplish and that's that...we can only do so much....the rest is out of our hands...
I LOVE~~I MEAN LOVE you girls..I love to be able to run off on a lil tangent and KNOW no one is going to judge, (most of) YOU KNOW I'm VERY long winded but still will listen and give an encouraging word!!!
This thread is one of a kind and I Love you ALL..I love you input, your opinions, your advice, your knowledge, your kindness, encourangment and EVERYTHING else beautiful about you!!!!! JUST KNOW THAT!!!!

 

[spuggle]

Getting pregnant is definitely NOT something WE have total control over...If we did, we'd all have babies and be happy and wouldn't need this thread b/c life would perfect

IVF IS super expensive...like 7K for ONE round..and I (like you Dash) don't agree w/ it so much...not for me...
My TR was 11K and really we could have went one round IVF and failed then been more in the hole..Thinking the TR was the right choice,,,and the fact that we ALL did what we did and then chose to change that and choose life...we WILL be blessed...I REALLY believe it..and REALLY the stat's for TR ARE really good, like 86%~something huge...
Momma, THANK YOU for posting what you posted about the moods, un-enjoyment, ya know the one...about it consuming...I HAVE SOOOO felt that way and was "scared" to express it..I HATE to allow ANYTHING RULE my life...it's hard enough to CHOOSE to be positive w/out having a HUGE "thing" on the brain....I've SO been there and then felt rotten about feeling that way..UGH ..and Faith THANK YOU for posting what you did...I've sooo pushed my DC to the side a time or 2 or MANY times to google, research etc etc etc..I put them to bed...stay up FAR to late and then can't wake up w/ them in the morning....Or if I do, am grumpy w/ them...
I find out I'm not preg and get annoyed w/ THEM, I MC I'm annoyed w/ them..WHAT??????? Far too often I've allowed me to dwell on what I DO NOT have and want rather than what I have and cherish...I DO NOT NEED more children..I do desire to have a large family..but we DO NOT NEED and instead of being grateful I'm annoyed, grumpy, and mean..???!!!! WHOA
I'm sorry I'm having a lil tangent but I THINK It's a good thing
I have decided that THIS is THE month...ALL of my faith is in my God FOR that...IF He would chose to not bless that...OK, but either way I WILL stop temping in 70 days...I'll know my bod by then which IS what I wanted to accomplish and that's that...we can only do so much....the rest is out of our hands...
I LOVE~~I MEAN LOVE you girls..I love to be able to run off on a lil tangent and KNOW no one is going to judge, (most of) YOU KNOW I'm VERY long winded but still will listen and give an encouraging word!!!
This thread is one of a kind and I Love you ALL..I love you input, your opinions, your advice, your knowledge, your kindness, encourangment and EVERYTHING else beautiful about you!!!!! JUST KNOW THAT!!!!

Tater i totally relate to everything you have put here, we should be greatful for what we have and enjoy it.

 

[sweetlissa]

HOLY COW $11,000 OMG.... mine was $5,900 and WOW.....

 

[spuggle]

I don't know what the conversion is between dollars and GB pounds but $11.000 seems alot, mine was £2.600.

 

[mommax3]

FAith, ready and tater im so happy to know im not the only one who has felt taken over even though Im trying very hard not to feel this way, Im going to wait until october to look into IUI that will be my year date but I agree ready im not taking no for an answer I mean I already shelled out $6,000 whats another 1,000 lol
i missed so much yesterday evening I will have to see what else I wanted to comment on lol we ran out of propane last night and im freezing right now ttyl

 

[spuggle]

FAith, ready and tater im so happy to know im not the only one who has felt taken over even though Im trying very hard not to feel this way, Im going to wait until october to look into IUI that will be my year date but I agree ready im not taking no for an answer I mean I already shelled out $6,000 whats another 1,000 lol
i missed so much yesterday evening I will have to see what else I wanted to comment on lol we ran out of propane last night and im freezing right now ttyl

brrrrr momma, hope you warm up soon. xxx

 

[mommax3]

YAY! we have heat again lol SO i totally messed with my chart I think i just messed it up lol oh well in my taking charge of your fertility book it tells you how to draw your baseline and even if I did O on cd17 ff shouldnt have put it where it was all because of 2 high temps ugh whatever im totally reading into this way to much!
Faith how ya feeling are you ss?
Dash did you test again im going crazy with wondering!!!
tater you must be getting ready to get your opk on
Future thanks for the info on the IUI
spuggle and ready hiya ladies
Im taking trace to a local place called kid zone today its ball pits and tunnels and stuff like that its 8 bucks for the whole day so my friend and I are just going to chill and let the kiddos play Im sure i will be back on as soon as I get home because Im a bnb addict

 

[spuggle]

YAY! we have heat again lol SO i totally messed with my chart I think i just messed it up lol oh well in my taking charge of your fertility book it tells you how to draw your baseline and even if I did O on cd17 ff shouldnt have put it where it was all because of 2 high temps ugh whatever im totally reading into this way to much!
Faith how ya feeling are you ss?
Dash did you test again im going crazy with wondering!!!
tater you must be getting ready to get your opk on
Future thanks for the info on the IUI
spuggle and ready hiya ladies
Im taking trace to a local place called kid zone today its ball pits and tunnels and stuff like that its 8 bucks for the whole day so my friend and I are just going to chill and let the kiddos play Im sure i will be back on as soon as I get home because Im a bnb addict

Have fun.

 

[sweetlissa]

Yes Dash we are dieing to know... HOPE YOU GET A BFP

 

[tatertahelon]

I don't know what the conversion is between dollars and GB pounds but $11.000 seems alot, mine was £2.600.

I'm sorry, I'm pretty uneducated..is you money in euro's? I wanna Google it and see the conversion...

 

[spuggle]

I don't know what the conversion is between dollars and GB pounds but $11.000 seems alot, mine was £2.600.

I'm sorry, I'm pretty uneducated..is you money in euro's? I wanna Google it and see the conversion...

It's GB sterling pounds hun.

 

[spuggle]

I don't know what the conversion is between dollars and GB pounds but $11.000 seems alot, mine was £2.600.

I'm sorry, I'm pretty uneducated..is you money in euro's? I wanna Google it and see the conversion...

It's GB sterling pounds hun.

What is your currency ?

 

[tatertahelon]

OK, thanks..
US dollars

 

[tatertahelon]

OK, so I THINK my cost ~the $11,000.00 in US dollars would be 6867.71 in the GB sterling pounds....

Yeah, it cost a LOT..we were NOT expecting it to be that much...They HAD originally told us $14,500...but we looked at each other and asked the girl to give us a minute...she did and we prayed that the Lord would work it out and 5 min later when she came back in she was all apologizing saying that SHE had made a mistake and that was an incorrect number...it would actually be $11,000....so in 5 min it went from $14,500 to $11,000..I was like can you leave for 5 more minutes...? We are on a roll here, maybe it'll go down some more it didn't..but it was a blessing!!!!!!

 

[Sagapo75]

I am so far behind, I don't know how I will ever catch up! I read through a little and I saw that Ready, you have cysts and are considering IUI? And I saw that we have at least one new member...Spuggle! Welcome! So glad you found us...I will read back through everything to see what is going on with the rest of my TR gals sometime today...but after this post, I am going to do something I never do...and take a NAP.

Y'all, this has really been a crappy couple of days... I had ANOTHER positive test last month...followed by my period. And now just a few days AFTER my 'period' ended, I am spotting and cramping AGAIN. I did go to the doctor after my latest positive HPT and subsequent period. I WAS pregnant...and now my HCG levels are at 6...so no medical intervention necessary...

And if that weren't bad enough...you guys know that my husband and I were contemplating IVF...just simply because of our ages...moreso his than mine...he said he will already be 52 when our child is ten and he does not want to wait much longer to get pregnant...I can't blame him for feeling that way. So, we were seriously considering IVF, but I was holding out hope that it would happen naturally before that became an issue and IVF would no longer be necessary...BUT...

We knew in the beginning that my husband had a slightly abnormal sperm count...his morphology was on the low side, but not THAT low. Since absolutely everything else was NORMAL, we were told that we should still be able to conceive naturally. However, since we were considering IVF, we have already been doing all the preliminary stuff, testing, etc. I still have no polyps, cysts, etc...I am doing well on all counts... My poor hubby went in for his testing...his SA...and we got the results back....his morphology has gotten lower. It was down to 3%. He did a repeat one following that one and that one was even WORSE. The results on that one were 2% morphology.

Our doctor said that if I do get pregnant, which I have...that it likely will not be sustainable...BUT, given the fact that he IS producing sperm, there is a chance we could achieve a healthy pregnancy naturally, but the odds are just really low. He said if we were 25, he would recommend that we just keep trying...but considering our ages, he thinks IVF is the ONLY way we will be able to have a baby together. Their success rate for IVF per cycle is 60 to 65%...which, I guess, is a hell of a lot better than our 2% chance of conceiving naturally per cycle...

They think that his morphology issue is being caused by a varocele (I have no idea if I spelled that right). It's an enlarged vessel or cluster of vessels in the testicles that causes them to be warmer than they should be...and heat on sperm is a bad thing...Our doctor said he could have surgery to repair it...and continue to try naturally...but because the varocele will cause no harm to him to leave it there, and because of our limited time to conceive because of our ages, he said if it were him, he would skip the varocele surgery and go directly to IVF.

We both agree...apparently one of us had surgery for nothing...the other one should not have to follow suit...

Honestly, I really don't care if they have to put a baby in through my ear...it's the end result that matters...but...it's just so damn frustrating. I just want to scream!!!

Sooooo...at some point this summer, I will undergo IVF. It's already written in stone... But in the meantime, my doctor told me that people who are in good shape and are at or close to their ideal weight tend to have the most success...so I have been treating myself as if I am training for the biggest marathon of my life...and in a way, I am...

The bad news is that IVF will cost a total of $12,000.00 PER CYCLE. Yes, did you blow a gasket in your brain reading that? I know I did! And that will be $12,000.00 on TOP OF the $6500.00 we spent on the TR! AGHHHHH!!!!!!!! HOLY SH*T! I feel so blessed and fortunate that we can do that...and we have already pre-agreed to try two cycles, if necessary. If we can't get pregnant through two cycles of IVF, then I am just going to take in some more stray dogs and buy them cute outfits like I've been doing already...yep, I'll just become the crazy dog lady...

The doctor also said that there is absolutely NO reason IVF won't work for us...my uterus is strong and healthy...hormones normal...everything is good. We just have to get a good, healthy embryo in there...and it SHOULD implant. Once pregnancy is confirmed, I will have to give myself a shot of progesterone every day for TWELVE WEEKS! Yes, I said shoot myself in the arse with a needle every day for TWELVE WEEKS! And before pregnancy, I will have to shoot myself up MULTIPLE times a day with various medications so that multiple eggs can be harvested at once...they are hoping for 15+. Holy moly. I am not having 15 kids....so that leaves the very unpleasant issue of...what to do with extra embryos...freeze them...or...ugh...destroy them...what a horrible thing to have to contemplate...that just makes me so sad.

Jeez...but once they harvest from me, they also get a 'sample' from my husband, wash it (meaning they separate the good ones from the bad ones), put it together with my eggs...then they wait 5 days, pick the 'best' ones, and implant...my doctor recommends implanting 2-4. I have already decided on just two. If I did 4, then it would be just my luck that they would all take and I would be pregnant with quads. Which would be great if I was a bigger woman...but I am a small framed 5"0' woman....I just would have no room to put them anywhere...and they would come early. I had twins naturally and THEY were born 10 weeks early because there was just no room in the Inn, if you know what I mean. There is a 40 to 50% chance of having multiples with IVF...and honestly, that scares the hell out of me because of what I went through last time. I went into pre-term labor very early...I took a pill, terbutyline, to stop pre-term labor...and it worked for a while, but the problem is your body builds up a tolerance and it will stop working...and it did. So, I had to wear a pump that administered a steady dose...the problem with that was I had to wear it for weeks and I had to learn to insert a cath into my own thigh and alternate thighs each week...not fun. THEN that began to stop working...and at that point, I was rushed to the hospital and the only alternative for me, the last resort, was magnesium sulfate...they administer in one mass dose and some people have horrible reactions to it...even those who don't have "horrible" reactions, the mag is awful...it makes you feel like you are on FIRE from the inside...the nurse told me she has seen women rip off their own clothes because of the way it makes you feel...but I was one of those women with the HORRIBLE reactions. Mag sulfate is a smooth muscle relaxer. Your uterus is a smooth muscle...but so are your heart and lungs. That does of magnesium sulfate caused my heart to stop...and I 'died'. I was gone for about 5 minutes. They brought me back just as they were making the decision to give up and just take the twins...

After they were born, my son also went into cardiac arrest...from all the trauma...you would never know it now though...he's a mess...

But, I was SO hoping I could conceive naturally...less chance of multiples...knowing that I have to have IVF and knowing that there is a 50/50 chance of having twins and going through that all over again scares the t-total SH*T out of me....and like I just NEED something else to worry about...

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just feel like smacking someone...I know it's irrational...it's no one's fault, but I swear, right about now, I think it would just make me FEEL better.

 

[spuggle]

OK, so I THINK my cost ~the $11,000.00 in US dollars would be 6867.71 in the GB sterling pounds....

Yeah, it cost a LOT..we were NOT expecting it to be that much...They HAD originally told us $14,500...but we looked at each other and asked the girl to give us a minute...she did and we prayed that the Lord would work it out and 5 min later when she came back in she was all apologizing saying that SHE had made a mistake and that was an incorrect number...it would actually be $11,000....so in 5 min it went from $14,500 to $11,000..I was like can you leave for 5 more minutes...? We are on a roll here, maybe it'll go down some more it didn't..but it was a blessing!!!!!!

Yes that's right, i worked it out too.

It's still alot of money though, glad they sorted out the mix up with price.

When i was researching having mine done i went for the closest hospital to where we live which is only about 4 miles away luckily, and it was the cheapest, some of the others i called wanted £4.000 which i thought was pricey, IVF over here is around £5.000 per go and IUI is around £500-£1000 per go.

 

[spuggle]

I am so far behind, I don't know how I will ever catch up! I read through a little and I saw that Ready, you have cysts and are considering IUI? And I saw that we have at least one new member...Spuggle! Welcome! So glad you found us...I will read back through everything to see what is going on with the rest of my TR gals sometime today...but after this post, I am going to do something I never do...and take a NAP.

Y'all, this has really been a crappy couple of days... I had ANOTHER positive test last month...followed by my period. And now just a few days AFTER my 'period' ended, I am spotting and cramping AGAIN. I did go to the doctor after my latest positive HPT and subsequent period. I WAS pregnant...and now my HCG levels are at 6...so no medical intervention necessary...

And if that weren't bad enough...you guys know that my husband and I were contemplating IVF...just simply because of our ages...moreso his than mine...he said he will already be 52 when our child is ten and he does not want to wait much longer to get pregnant...I can't blame him for feeling that way. So, we were seriously considering IVF, but I was holding out hope that it would happen naturally before that became an issue and IVF would no longer be necessary...BUT...

We knew in the beginning that my husband had a slightly abnormal sperm count...his morphology was on the low side, but not THAT low. Since absolutely everything else was NORMAL, we were told that we should still be able to conceive naturally. However, since we were considering IVF, we have already been doing all the preliminary stuff, testing, etc. I still have no polyps, cysts, etc...I am doing well on all counts... My poor hubby went in for his testing...his SA...and we got the results back....his morphology has gotten lower. It was down to 3%. He did a repeat one following that one and that one was even WORSE. The results on that one were 2% morphology.

Our doctor said that if I do get pregnant, which I have...that it likely will not be sustainable...BUT, given the fact that he IS producing sperm, there is a chance we could achieve a healthy pregnancy naturally, but the odds are just really low. He said if we were 25, he would recommend that we just keep trying...but considering our ages, he thinks IVF is the ONLY way we will be able to have a baby together. Their success rate for IVF per cycle is 60 to 65%...which, I guess, is a hell of a lot better than our 2% chance of conceiving naturally per cycle...

They think that his morphology issue is being caused by a varocele (I have no idea if I spelled that right). It's an enlarged vessel or cluster of vessels in the testicles that causes them to be warmer than they should be...and heat on sperm is a bad thing...Our doctor said he could have surgery to repair it...and continue to try naturally...but because the varocele will cause no harm to him to leave it there, and because of our limited time to conceive because of our ages, he said if it were him, he would skip the varocele surgery and go directly to IVF.

We both agree...apparently one of us had surgery for nothing...the other one should not have to follow suit...

Honestly, I really don't care if they have to put a baby in through my ear...it's the end result that matters...but...it's just so damn frustrating. I just want to scream!!!

Sooooo...at some point this summer, I will undergo IVF. It's already written in stone... But in the meantime, my doctor told me that people who are in good shape and are at or close to their ideal weight tend to have the most success...so I have been treating myself as if I am training for the biggest marathon of my life...and in a way, I am...

The bad news is that IVF will cost a total of $12,000.00 PER CYCLE. Yes, did you blow a gasket in your brain reading that? I know I did! And that will be $12,000.00 on TOP OF the $6500.00 we spent on the TR! AGHHHHH!!!!!!!! HOLY SH*T! I feel so blessed and fortunate that we can do that...and we have already pre-agreed to try two cycles, if necessary. If we can't get pregnant through two cycles of IVF, then I am just going to take in some more stray dogs and buy them cute outfits like I've been doing already...yep, I'll just become the crazy dog lady...

The doctor also said that there is absolutely NO reason IVF won't work for us...my uterus is strong and healthy...hormones normal...everything is good. We just have to get a good, healthy embryo in there...and it SHOULD implant. Once pregnancy is confirmed, I will have to give myself a shot of progesterone every day for TWELVE WEEKS! Yes, I said shoot myself in the arse with a needle every day for TWELVE WEEKS! And before pregnancy, I will have to shoot myself up MULTIPLE times a day with various medications so that multiple eggs can be harvested at once...they are hoping for 15+. Holy moly. I am not having 15 kids....so that leaves the very unpleasant issue of...what to do with extra embryos...freeze them...or...ugh...destroy them...what a horrible thing to have to contemplate...that just makes me so sad.

Jeez...but once they harvest from me, they also get a 'sample' from my husband, wash it (meaning they separate the good ones from the bad ones), put it together with my eggs...then they wait 5 days, pick the 'best' ones, and implant...my doctor recommends implanting 2-4. I have already decided on just two. If I did 4, then it would be just my luck that they would all take and I would be pregnant with quads. Which would be great if I was a bigger woman...but I am a small framed 5"0' woman....I just would have no room to put them anywhere...and they would come early. I had twins naturally and THEY were born 10 weeks early because there was just no room in the Inn, if you know what I mean. There is a 40 to 50% chance of having multiples with IVF...and honestly, that scares the hell out of me because of what I went through last time. I went into pre-term labor very early...I took a pill, terbutyline, to stop pre-term labor...and it worked for a while, but the problem is your body builds up a tolerance and it will stop working...and it did. So, I had to wear a pump that administered a steady dose...the problem with that was I had to wear it for weeks and I had to learn to insert a cath into my own thigh and alternate thighs each week...not fun. THEN that began to stop working...and at that point, I was rushed to the hospital and the only alternative for me, the last resort, was magnesium sulfate...they administer in one mass dose and some people have horrible reactions to it...even those who don't have "horrible" reactions, the mag is awful...it makes you feel like you are on FIRE from the inside...the nurse told me she has seen women rip off their own clothes because of the way it makes you feel...but I was one of those women with the HORRIBLE reactions. Mag sulfate is a smooth muscle relaxer. Your uterus is a smooth muscle...but so are your heart and lungs. That does of magnesium sulfate caused my heart to stop...and I 'died'. I was gone for about 5 minutes. They brought me back just as they were making the decision to give up and just take the twins...

After they were born, my son also went into cardiac arrest...from all the trauma...you would never know it now though...he's a mess...

But, I was SO hoping I could conceive naturally...less chance of multiples...knowing that I have to have IVF and knowing that there is a 50/50 chance of having twins and going through that all over again scares the t-total SH*T out of me....and like I just NEED something else to worry about...

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just feel like smacking someone...I know it's irrational...it's no one's fault, but I swear, right about now, I think it would just make me FEEL better.

Hi Saga and thanks for the welcome, wow you have been through and are going through alot, my Dh suffers from 5% morphology and is having another SA on friday to see if it has improved at all so i know how you feel from that point of view, is you DH on anti depressants at all ?? it's just that they have been linked to low morphology, my DH was on them when he last did a sample.

I hope the IVF goes well for you keep us posted with your progress and i'm so sorry for your loss last month

 

[Sagapo75]

Way to go not POAS. I'm sure I will lack the self control not to- just as i lacked the self control to not polish off that cheesecake. I will be anxiously waiting to see how this month turns out for you! Positive changes always pay off.

Here is a link to the first sweater I knitted:

https://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2039295&id=1073050889

I think you guys should be able to see it, I have that one pic set to public. I LOVE knitting, and it keeps my hands busy which is nice. I taught myself by watching Youtube videos so if you want to learn how Tate, I suggest that- there are some good ones!

Aghhh! Oops! I was trying to look at your hoodie...but it didn't show me anything...so I sent a friend request and a message...but then I realized it wasn't YOU! All I said was...I saw the link to the hoodie you posted...I can't see the hoodie, but I saw that you have a FB page...this is Diana, a.k.a Sagapo75.

So, whoever she is got some random cryptic message from a woman in SC today...oops!

 

[Sagapo75]

I am so far behind, I don't know how I will ever catch up! I read through a little and I saw that Ready, you have cysts and are considering IUI? And I saw that we have at least one new member...Spuggle! Welcome! So glad you found us...I will read back through everything to see what is going on with the rest of my TR gals sometime today...but after this post, I am going to do something I never do...and take a NAP.

Y'all, this has really been a crappy couple of days... I had ANOTHER positive test last month...followed by my period. And now just a few days AFTER my 'period' ended, I am spotting and cramping AGAIN. I did go to the doctor after my latest positive HPT and subsequent period. I WAS pregnant...and now my HCG levels are at 6...so no medical intervention necessary...

And if that weren't bad enough...you guys know that my husband and I were contemplating IVF...just simply because of our ages...moreso his than mine...he said he will already be 52 when our child is ten and he does not want to wait much longer to get pregnant...I can't blame him for feeling that way. So, we were seriously considering IVF, but I was holding out hope that it would happen naturally before that became an issue and IVF would no longer be necessary...BUT...

We knew in the beginning that my husband had a slightly abnormal sperm count...his morphology was on the low side, but not THAT low. Since absolutely everything else was NORMAL, we were told that we should still be able to conceive naturally. However, since we were considering IVF, we have already been doing all the preliminary stuff, testing, etc. I still have no polyps, cysts, etc...I am doing well on all counts... My poor hubby went in for his testing...his SA...and we got the results back....his morphology has gotten lower. It was down to 3%. He did a repeat one following that one and that one was even WORSE. The results on that one were 2% morphology.

Our doctor said that if I do get pregnant, which I have...that it likely will not be sustainable...BUT, given the fact that he IS producing sperm, there is a chance we could achieve a healthy pregnancy naturally, but the odds are just really low. He said if we were 25, he would recommend that we just keep trying...but considering our ages, he thinks IVF is the ONLY way we will be able to have a baby together. Their success rate for IVF per cycle is 60 to 65%...which, I guess, is a hell of a lot better than our 2% chance of conceiving naturally per cycle...

They think that his morphology issue is being caused by a varocele (I have no idea if I spelled that right). It's an enlarged vessel or cluster of vessels in the testicles that causes them to be warmer than they should be...and heat on sperm is a bad thing...Our doctor said he could have surgery to repair it...and continue to try naturally...but because the varocele will cause no harm to him to leave it there, and because of our limited time to conceive because of our ages, he said if it were him, he would skip the varocele surgery and go directly to IVF.

We both agree...apparently one of us had surgery for nothing...the other one should not have to follow suit...

Honestly, I really don't care if they have to put a baby in through my ear...it's the end result that matters...but...it's just so damn frustrating. I just want to scream!!!

Sooooo...at some point this summer, I will undergo IVF. It's already written in stone... But in the meantime, my doctor told me that people who are in good shape and are at or close to their ideal weight tend to have the most success...so I have been treating myself as if I am training for the biggest marathon of my life...and in a way, I am...

The bad news is that IVF will cost a total of $12,000.00 PER CYCLE. Yes, did you blow a gasket in your brain reading that? I know I did! And that will be $12,000.00 on TOP OF the $6500.00 we spent on the TR! AGHHHHH!!!!!!!! HOLY SH*T! I feel so blessed and fortunate that we can do that...and we have already pre-agreed to try two cycles, if necessary. If we can't get pregnant through two cycles of IVF, then I am just going to take in some more stray dogs and buy them cute outfits like I've been doing already...yep, I'll just become the crazy dog lady...

The doctor also said that there is absolutely NO reason IVF won't work for us...my uterus is strong and healthy...hormones normal...everything is good. We just have to get a good, healthy embryo in there...and it SHOULD implant. Once pregnancy is confirmed, I will have to give myself a shot of progesterone every day for TWELVE WEEKS! Yes, I said shoot myself in the arse with a needle every day for TWELVE WEEKS! And before pregnancy, I will have to shoot myself up MULTIPLE times a day with various medications so that multiple eggs can be harvested at once...they are hoping for 15+. Holy moly. I am not having 15 kids....so that leaves the very unpleasant issue of...what to do with extra embryos...freeze them...or...ugh...destroy them...what a horrible thing to have to contemplate...that just makes me so sad.

Jeez...but once they harvest from me, they also get a 'sample' from my husband, wash it (meaning they separate the good ones from the bad ones), put it together with my eggs...then they wait 5 days, pick the 'best' ones, and implant...my doctor recommends implanting 2-4. I have already decided on just two. If I did 4, then it would be just my luck that they would all take and I would be pregnant with quads. Which would be great if I was a bigger woman...but I am a small framed 5"0' woman....I just would have no room to put them anywhere...and they would come early. I had twins naturally and THEY were born 10 weeks early because there was just no room in the Inn, if you know what I mean. There is a 40 to 50% chance of having multiples with IVF...and honestly, that scares the hell out of me because of what I went through last time. I went into pre-term labor very early...I took a pill, terbutyline, to stop pre-term labor...and it worked for a while, but the problem is your body builds up a tolerance and it will stop working...and it did. So, I had to wear a pump that administered a steady dose...the problem with that was I had to wear it for weeks and I had to learn to insert a cath into my own thigh and alternate thighs each week...not fun. THEN that began to stop working...and at that point, I was rushed to the hospital and the only alternative for me, the last resort, was magnesium sulfate...they administer in one mass dose and some people have horrible reactions to it...even those who don't have "horrible" reactions, the mag is awful...it makes you feel like you are on FIRE from the inside...the nurse told me she has seen women rip off their own clothes because of the way it makes you feel...but I was one of those women with the HORRIBLE reactions. Mag sulfate is a smooth muscle relaxer. Your uterus is a smooth muscle...but so are your heart and lungs. That does of magnesium sulfate caused my heart to stop...and I 'died'. I was gone for about 5 minutes. They brought me back just as they were making the decision to give up and just take the twins...

After they were born, my son also went into cardiac arrest...from all the trauma...you would never know it now though...he's a mess...

But, I was SO hoping I could conceive naturally...less chance of multiples...knowing that I have to have IVF and knowing that there is a 50/50 chance of having twins and going through that all over again scares the t-total SH*T out of me....and like I just NEED something else to worry about...

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I just feel like smacking someone...I know it's irrational...it's no one's fault, but I swear, right about now, I think it would just make me FEEL better.

Hi Saga and thanks for the welcome, wow you have been through and are going through alot, my Dh suffers from 5% morphology and is having another SA on friday to see if it has improved at all so i know how you feel from that point of view, is you DH on anti depressants at all ?? it's just that they have been linked to low morphology, my DH was on them when he last did a sample.

I hope the IVF goes well for you keep us posted with your progress and i'm so sorry for your loss last month

Nope, he has never been on antidepressants...he's like me...neither of us will take anything other than Tylenol if we can help it...I haven't taken antibiotics of any kind in 5 years...he's healthy as a horse...whodathunk he would have a varocele!?! *sigh*

 

[spuggle]

It was just a thought. x